Kristen Kalp's Blog

You know what people I deeply admire are really good at, no matter their other beliefs or talents?

Decision-making.

They have figured out how to reach a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ or a ‘give me more information please.’

They know how to FIND THE ANSWER WITHIN THEMSELVES, regardless of what the world is saying or doing or yelling or ignoring.

In this episode of That’s What She Said, Sara Arey and I explore the world of No-ing and Knowing.

There are many ways to approach decision-making that aren’t ‘thinking about it’ while endlessly looping in ‘I don’t know.’

We’ll help you distinguish between logical thinking and intuitive knowing. That’s a crucial part of making choices that align with your WHOLE BEING, not just your calendar or bank account.

Sara and I will also help you hone the bodily awareness and feeling powers that help you reach a decision. ANY decision, not just one about the Creation Constellation retreat we’re hosting in February.

If “I don’t know’ is your Achilles heel, we’ll also talk about the upsides and downsides of this handly little phrase.

The Creation Constellation retreat will deeply align you with your power and life force.

If you’re facing a big challenge, a new chapter, or an overwhelming period in which the some shitty pattern replays over and over and over, this IS for you.

✨ Book your call to talk with us about attending.

No sales page, nowhere to read bullet points, just one call stands between you and the retreat!

P.S. Listen to this podcast episode for a deeper dive into what the retreat entails!

The post No and Knowing appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

You know that thing?

…that vivid vision that haunts you, but you can’t figure out where it fits in your life so you tell yourself you’ll worry about it later?

…that dream you’ve had for years now, but you’ve taken zero steps toward bringing it to life?

…that pattern you keep repeating and you’ve decided to solve it through SHEER WORRY because SURELY if you just quietly freak out for another six months, you’ll find the answer?

…that problem you keep to yourself, hoping it will resolve with no further attention?

I know how much you want to handle those dreams and visions and problems and patterns ALONE.

I know how much paralysis comes from not knowing EXACTLY how to begin.

And I know how much movement comes from sharing the glorious mess of you with other humans.

YES OF COURSE I KNOW YOU’D RATHER BE PERFECT AND NEED NO ONE.

But that doesn’t appear to be how this whole ‘being human’ thing works.

We need each other when we’re sloppy or lost or confused or running in circles or just beginning something important.

We need each other MOST when we’re trying to follow the faint nudges of intuition that a few thousand years of patriarchy have tried to kill.

If you find yourself at a crossroads, a precipice, or quietly spinning your wheels, listen to this week’s podcast. 

In this episode of That’s What She Said,
Sara Arey and I
introduce you to our winter retreat,
walk you through why you care and who it’s for,
then invite you to talk to us about attending.

Spoiler alert: you’ll enjoy chatting with the two of us whether you decide to attend or not. We’re friggin magical.

Book your call with us. 

Hugs,
K

The post Brand New Magic appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

There’s this overwhelming pressure women put on themselves to do MORE with LESS.

We’re striving for more engagement, more hustle, more productivity, and more impact..

…with less time, less energy, less enthusiasm, less sleep, and less support than ever before.

When 💩 hits the fan, we push ourselves HARDER to keep going.

The impulse is correct: when things are dire, we have to keep going.

And the impulse is also programmed: when things are dire, women are trained to skip fueling up because WE NEED TO KEEP GOING. IT’S MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVER, DON’T YOU SEE??? HOW COULD WE WORRY ABOUT RESTING AT A TIME LIKE THIS!????

We collectively pretend we’re doing GREAT with 4 hours of sleep, 3 deep breaths, and an endless supply of lattes.In reality, we’re STARVING.

We’re starving for rest and calm.
We’re starving for a sense of connection to our fellow humans.
We’re starving for trust and safety.
We’re starving for ways to heal from all the things the pandemic broke in our societies and in our beings.

I want to help stop the starving.

That’s why I’ve gathered my nerdiest embodiment friends, Sara Arey and Emily Jaworski-Koriath, to co-create The Antidote.

The Antidote is a series of monthly gatherings that will help you refuel at the deepest levels so that you can face the rest of 2024 with resilience and grace.

Sara, Emily, and myself do NOT want you to stumble through 2024 depleted af.

We want you to create the habit of fueling yourself at the deepest levels so that you can take more effective action in every part of your life. (And if the thought of taking action feels SO EXHAUSTING…grab your seat in The Antidote now.)

👉🏻 The Antidote details live here.

Start by listening to the latest episode of That’s What She Said, This is The Antidote, and see if what we’re creating resonates with you. 👇🏻

Promo code TRUST takes $33 off the price until our first gathering on March 12th.

P.S. If you’re a woman who’s…

⚡️ overworked
⚡️ exhausted
⚡️ doomscrolling
⚡️ lonely
⚡️ out of the habit of refueling/resting
⚡️ generally freaking out
⚡️ afraid of the news

…please check out The Antidote.

The post This is The Antidote. appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

My past year has basically been a tour of everywhere that you do not want to go as a human: loss, failure, loneliness, detachment, existential angst, grief, both parents’ cancer, and fear.

AND I’M STILL HERE.

This episode of That’s What She Said details the ways I’ve moved through the time since losing my mom.

Take a meander through the most devastating year of my life, embroidered with poems and tenderness and laughter.

In this episode, I’ll walk you through the practice that helped to reconnect me to my body, my breath, and my being when grief hit. Then, I’ll share completely heretical, would-have-gotten-me-burned-at-the-stake things I’ve learned to help me re-establish my connection to the divine.

I encourage you to embrace the bigger, larger, more profound connection to the divine that I’m detailing within this episode. It’s a connection I never found in a church of any denomination, but that I feel each time I place my feet on the earth. (Related: coming out of the spiritual closet.)

Progress Report

In the sacred text
left behind by Mary Magdalene,
the word ‘God’ was replaced by
‘The Good.’

Mama I saw
snowdrops yesterday.
They were revealed when the snow melted,
blooming on ice.

I almost genuflected in the mud.

Mama I’ve seen
birds bathing in the stream
as the woods thawed
and the juncos were passing through,

I’ve seen fog and rain
and the leaves falling one by one
for weeks until only a handful
hung on for winter,

I’ve seen deer
wandering through the forest
and a fox slinking through the snow.

Mama now I know
the pulsing of the land, alive,
even in winter.

I can feel the creek’s current
in my fingertips as it passes.

I’ve drawn the sun into my chest
and danced as if you’ve never left;
I’ve wet the forest floor with tears
for everything we did
and did not say.

Mama I’ve never danced so much.

I’ve shown up in the forest and loved
you, the world, the sky,
The Good,
even when nothing felt good
and I wanted to join you
somewhere beneath the earth.

Mama, I’ve seen
The Good.

Mama.
I’ve seen The Good.

P.S. The word Heretic is IN THE TITLE, so please don’t listen if you’re a Good Catholic Looking to Take Offense At Every Word I Say.

If you’re curious about how a formerly Catholic woman moves beyond early experiences of church to reclaim her connection to the divine — listen in now.

The post Dance of the Heretic 💃🏼 appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

Last week I heckled a man with a gun. It’s the PERFECT way to kick off my IDGAF era!

I’ll tell you the story in this episode of That’s What She Said.

WHAT DOES YOUR IDGAF ERA MEAN, KRISTEN?

Since I started a business 15 years ago, I’ve made things with all of my heart and soul. I’ve cared about every creation so deeply that I could hardly speak about it. I then followed a general pattern of undervaluing my work, beginning to value it, and then pricing myself right out of the market as I gained confidence.

It happened with photography, with ghostwriting, with straight-up writing, and with business coaching over the course of the past 15 years.

Throughout time, I’ve consciously asked: how do I make meaning through the ways that I make money?

For the first time, here’s what I’m doing:

I’m gonna play.
I’m gonna make products.

If they work, great.
If they don’t work, great.

I’m consciously untying money from meaning in 2024.

This translates to creating a number of biz experiments just to see what happens.  Some are private, some are public, some will use my real name, and some a pseudonym.

This is about holding my creations as they relate to capitalism a little more loosely, giving my ideas room to breathe, and reporting back about what I find.

My IDGAF era is for stretching those
purely-for-the-hell-of-it
muscles.

EXPERIMENT #1:

I’ve created literal IDGAF jewelry for my new experimental shop, Goldenswift!

These talismans are inspired by Taylor Swift’s use of the word ‘Eras’ to describe life phases.

⚡️ Grab your IDGAF era jewelry at Goldenswift.

P.S. On your own journey to IDGAF, may I suggest creating a NO Collection? 😉

The post In my IDGAF era appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

For a number of months there I felt like toothpaste.

You know how, when you have toothpaste and it’s in a tube, you come to the end…

…and then you roll it all the way down until eventually there’s just nothing left.

You don’t have new toothpaste so you’re just desperately pressing on the tube, like. “COME ON, GIMME SOMETHINGGGGG!!!”

But there’s nothing. No matter how hard you squeeze.

That was my life for a number of months last year.  We could call it burnout, but that sounds so clean and easily spotted.  This was trickier.

As much as I was like, “Just squeeze it harder!!!!!,” my method didn’t work.

If you’re doing capitalism in any sort of ongoing way, you’ll have your toothpaste moments when there’s just…nothing left.

This episode of the That’s What She Said podcast is for your toothpaste moments.

How do you navigate from NOTHING to something?
How do you begin to fill your tank if it’s been on E for days or weeks or months or years or decades?
What’s so bad about being the human equivalent of an empty tube of toothpaste?

We’ll get really existential and really practical together in this episode of That’s What She Said.

P.S. Did you see that Rob Bell was in the house recently? Go listen!

The post Reporting From Toothpaste (And by toothpaste I mean burnout) appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

Come along with me for a gorgeous conversation about all things grief and joy and life and death and a new novel, Where’d You Park Your Spaceship, with the one and only Rob Bell.

We talk about books and writing (what’s it like to hold a world in your head?), the process of starting over and over and over (how do you JUST KEEP GOING, ROB BELL?), and why Rob’s being bad at ‘parking it’ is a gift to you and me and him and all of us.

I’ve been a fan-but-not-a-stan of Rob’s for 9 years now, and this conversation was pure joy from beginning to end.  The delight in my voice is PALPABLE throughout.

Grab the 1st 100 pages of Where’d You Park Your Spaceship here.  (SPOILER ALERT IF YOU DOWNLOAD THESE PAGES YOU’LL END UP BUYING THE BOOK.)

P.S. ‘Brave’ is just another word for vulnerable.

The post Rob Bell is in the house! appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

I’ve never had an experience like this one.

For 8 months, I cultivated the energy of The Innermost, checking in with it, taking notes, making plans, and generally dreaming it to life. EIGHT. MONTHS.

As it came to the public, with a sales page and affiliates and general marketing, I continued to check in with it daily. There were no sales and lots of ‘no’s and ‘no thank you’s, but certainly that would change, right?

And then last Tuesday, I woke up and there was no energy in the event. None. Where there had been enthusiasm and excitement and YAY LET’S DO THIS, there was simply nothing. Like a weird little void in my heart.

I checked my email and found what I call the Wall of No: dozens of asks, big and small, all responded to with a no of some kind. The California No, the Firm No, the ‘Maybe Later’ No, the ‘This Sounds Great But I Have Plans Already’ no, the ‘Invite Me Next Time’ No…on and on and on. Each no was kind, but complete.

(I’ve encouraged entrepreneurs to build a No Collection for years now. Normally there’s a Yes or 17 on the other side of all those no’s. Not this time, though!)

Past me would have pushed HARDER: maybe there are a few dozen more people I can ask to promote this event! Maybe if I just buy ads/promote harder/send an endless stream of emails/harass the fuck out of my people…!

Truth be told, the pushing sounds exhausting. And with a fresh case of long Covid, I don’t have the energy for the pushing.

So, The Innermost is canceled.

In this episode of That’s What She Said, I’m speaking directly from the place exactly 0% of business owners like to be: the place where your latest project has been canceled and you have absolutely NO idea how the next one will take shape.

Listen in as I walk you through The Land You Hope You’ll Never Visit with humor and as much insight as I can muster.

P.S. When your failproof plan fails…it’s time to let your deep knowing drive the bus. 😉

The post The Wall of NO (Innermost event = canceled) appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

When you bring something entirely new to the world, it can be hard to find the words for it.  Further — the FEEL of a live event is difficult to convey via the internets.

The Innermost is as much a devoted space for exploring the taboo as it is an event — which is why Taboo Time was born!

Taboo Time is a brief podcast series featuring conversations about alllll things business taboo.  Rachel Clifton and I talk about the forbidden, the hidden, the invisible, and the ignored in business so you can FEEL what The Innermost will be like in a tangible way.

Softness and revelation? Check.

Deep, meaningful conversation? Check.

The willingness to ‘go there?’ Absolutely.

Listen in as we explore the taboos surrounding women and business 👇🏻

Taboo Time #1: The Lonely.

Between Covid and technological advances, we are far lonelier than we’ve ever been as entrepreneurs.  Worse, most of the time we don’t have safe places to talk about that loneliness — which is why it’s the first topic of Taboo Time. 😉

If you like what you hear, come to The Innermost! 

The Innermost is a live event this November that will help you identify and then neutralize all the ways conditioning passed down to females makes having a business a.) way harder than it has to be and b.) much less fun.  It’s LIVE because we all know ZOOM AIN’T IT — check it out!

P.S. The Innermost will be way more fun if YOU attend. 😉

The post Taboo Time appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.

The Innermost is coming to Asbury Park, New Jersey, this November 5-7, 2023.  It’s a live event designed to help you UnGoodGirl your business as quickly and painlessly as possible.

BUT WHAT AM I GOING TO LEARN, YOU ASK…

Let’s start with the fundamentals: how to steer your business to pleasingly profitable places, no matter the circumstances.

The world of owning a business is laced with ways to waste money, time, and energy ABSOLUTELY EVERYWHERE. You can easily waste maaaaany thousands of dollars, a few years of your life, and all the energies that cause grey hairs to emerge without making ANY real progress.

Good girl conditioning makes everything about owning a business WORSE.

Specifically, it makes having what you have and wanting what you want nearly impossible.  Those are the keys to navigating entrepreneurial waters cleanly and quickly.

Conditioning dictates that you aren’t reaaaally allowed to have what you have.

You aren’t to talk about your achievements, talents, gifts, powers, or accolades. You aren’t supposed to talk about money, either, which means that even discussions of funding and pricing can become taboo. Because you aren’t allowed to simply HAVE WHAT YOU HAVE, it becomes difficult to feel like you’re a ‘real’ business owner or that your success isn’t just ‘luck’ or ‘a fluke.’

Fully owning what you have, inventory style, is essential to directing your business with confidence in both your abilities and resources.

If your conditioning is fully intact, you won’t know what you want — which is the key to creating a business that brings energy and meaning to your life.

I have talked to MANY MANY MANY female business owners who do NOT want a business. They may have one because they had a hobby and spent too much money on it, so they tried to make it a profitable enterprise, or they may have taken the next ‘logical’ step with their talents, or they may have been forced to use their back-up plan when in financial hardship.

The key to undoing this conditioning is simply to SPEAK ALOUD WHAT YOU WANT AND THEN KEEP HOLD OF IT NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE SAYS.

No one on earth can ‘make’ you want something. It’s your job — your sacred duty, even — to be precise and clear about what, exactly, will light you up.

Sometimes the key is to let go of what you don’t want to make room for something better.
Sometimes the key is refining what you already have to make it sing.

No matter what: refusing to acknowledge what you have and what you want will end with a loss of time, power, and energy.

Listen to this episode of That’s What She Said to explore having and wanting in more detail, and to tease out the ways navigating from a place of secure resources and deep desire can help you starting right this moment.

If you enjoy what you hear, come to The Innermost!

P.S. My whoooooooole business at the moment is focused this one event, this one time, and it’s going to be PURE. MOTHERFUCKING. MAGIC. Check out The Innermost, okay?

The post Steering Your Business with EASE appeared first on ⚡️Kristen Kalp.