One week from today, the second book of the Moonfall Mayhem series, The Meddlers of Moonshine, will be released by World Weaver Press. I hope you're excited--I certainly am!

To celebrate the occasion, Raga-n-Bones, the co-protagonist of Meddlers, has generously offered to share some recipes and tips concerning his most favorite food in the world--avocados.

Take it away, Rags!

Hello! I’m Rags-n-Bones. I’m a friend to Miss Ascot, Sir Dmitri, and the Captain, and the terrified servant of The Mighty Terror from the Deepest Shadows. (Miss Ascot calls him Moony, but I wouldn’t dare.)

I love avocados. Even the word sounds yummy! Avocado! Avo-ca-do! Ah-VO-ca-DO! Doesn’t that make your tummy rumble?

Anyway, on October 25th, you’ll be able to read The Meddlers of Moonshine, which is the story of my adventures in the town of Widget. They were very scary at the time, but I met some new friends and it all worked out in the end. To celebrate the occasion, I thought it might be nice to share with you some of my favorite avocado recipes.

But before we get on to actually eating the avocados—oh, and I know what torture that is!—I think it might be good to talk about how to keep them happy.

Avocados are actually a fruit, even though they’re nutty-tasting rather than sweet. Sometimes they’re called “alligator pears,” although I think that’s a scary name! Alligators bite, and avocados would never do that. Avocados like warm climates, so if you live in a place where it snows, you probably won’t be able to grow them yourself. There are many different types of avocado, but the two you’re most likely to find in stores are Haas avocados and a kind from a mysterious land called Florida. You’ll notice a difference immediately. Haas avocados are dark in color, almost a purple-green, and their peel has little bumps all over it. The larger Florida avocados are green, shiny, and smooth. All avocados are yummy and deserve love, but Haas avocados have a richer, nuttier taste and should be used in most recipes. Florida avocados are particularly good in crisp, fresh salads.
The bad thing many people do when selecting an avocado is to squeeze it too hard. Don’t do this! Avocados are sensitive creatures, and even if the avocado is hard when you squeeze it, it will remember and form bruises as it ripens. There’s nothing sadder than opening up an avocado and finding it all black inside because it was hurt earlier.

Instead of squeezing the avocado, probe it gently near the stem end. This is where ripeness will first show. If it’s hard here, the avocado is definitely not ripe and should be stored in a paper bag for two to three days to ripen quietly. They ripen quicker when it’s warm, of course.

But if the area near the stem has flexible feel to it, probe the other end—again, gently! If it’s hard, store the avocado for a day before checking again. If the has some softness to it, you may slowly and gently squeeze the avocado around the middle. You’re checking for pliability, rather than actual squishiness. Overripe avocados can get mushy around the edges. If they’re not too liquid or bruised, they’re still tasty, but are perhaps best mashed up and used as a dip or spread on a sandwich.

A perfect avocado has pale green flesh with the texture and consistency of butter. Their peel should come away cleanly, without clinging to the flesh. Clinging peel is a sign of over-ripeness, or worse, rot. If your avocado does have some dark or squishy spots, it’s often possible to cut them out and enjoy the rest. I like to tear off the peel in strips and save it for nibbling later, but Miss Ascot tells me most people prefer to slice the avocado in half and remove the pit. To keep your knife from slipping and hurting you, thrust the point of the knife in first and then follow along the incision you’ve made. If the avocado’s ripe, the knife should sink in easily.

Recipe #1. Phew! Well, that should be enough to get you started. For this very first day, I will leave you with the easiest of all avocado recipes.

Avocado Au Natural
Ingredients: One ripe avocado. Salt and pepper, malt or apple cider vinegar (optional).

Directions: Find a quiet spot all to yourself. For best eating, avocados require privacy. Pet it a few times, gently, then cut the avocado in half, or gently tear pieces of peel away with your fingernails. If you follow the second option, you may wish to save the strips of peel for later nibbling.

Sprinkle with salt and pepper, or, if you cut the avocado in half, remove the pit and fill the hole with vinegar. Eat.

Oh my! *heart* *heart* *heart* *heart* *heart*

Extra note: It’s often advisable to sing to the avocado while eating it. This adds to the happiness of the occasion.