Life in the cloud is beautiful in fantasies, but hard in a reality. Imagine that you are focused only on one thing, instead of many duties and obligations you should do the next day. That one thing is your addiction. Ask yourself, did you ever forget to eat because in your mind was only a cigarette? Did you forget to pick up kids from school because you got drunk? Maybe you did not come at a date because you were gambling. Even it sounds really bad and irresponsible, these are characteristics of addicts.

I will not talk about a medicinal basis because I have no expert knowledge about this. I wish to talk about something I saw from my experience.



These are patterns of behavior when you met with the addict.

A drunk person, a gambler, the internet freak and other addicts have many things in common.

Family, parents, job or friends are on the margin.

This kind of addicts don’t care for a real world, their world is parallel space. A day is passing with glasses of wine or another alcoholic beverage, with wins on the casino or with a number of messages on the internet pages.

They are sleepless.

Once when you discover a secret “cure” for your problems, you will ask for that in any part of the day. The cell phone is under the bed, and you need to turn it on, to see if someone sent you a message. Let’s smoke because we can’t sleep. Let’s eat, something is in the fridge.

They neglect their partners.

You sit with that kind of person in a coffee bar and he is typing on a cell phone constantly. He is broke. without money and he doesn’t want to hear to leave the casino, cause he will win this time. Any advice is useless.

They cross their limits and risk.

When you are addicted, you will do everything to come and take your medicine. You will run for a source. If your source is the casino, you will run there in hope to get money. If your source is a cybersex, you will open the internet just to see your naked lover. If your source is a cigarette, you will spend last money on a tobacco.

They hurt another people, even without the intention.

Would you steal other’s lover for the sake of the own pleasure? Would you steal money to gamble? Would you leave from work, just to drink alcohol in a coffee bar near? If yes, you are addicted.

The addict seems like a weak person who doesn’t care about reality. If you think that the addicted person is someone in rags, dirty and poor, you are misguided. They are between us. Your boss is maybe the person who is addicted to Xanax. Your colleague can be a cyber freak, and your cooperator could be a drunk man who hides his addiction successfully.

The addiction is indeed a denial. You refuse to accept that you have a problem which should be solved in another way because the solution is not in the bottom of a glass. We are all close to the bottom. One or two bad crises, you wish to get drunk, smoke or to send everything into a hell.

Lena is a smoker. She is doing her work well, but she is under the stress. When her boss is unbearable, she is going out to smoke. A day by day, she is smoking more, because every time there is a reason that she must light a fire. She is coughing, but her addiction takes over.

When we assemble the union with the devil called the addiction, we are fooled that everything will look better. Maybe at that moment, when we are drunk or stoned, the reality is pinker. Problems are still there and they will not disappear if we don’t face it.

When you are in a relationship with the addict, you are with two persons. One is original and you love her. Another person is a clone, but the evil twin. That person stands between you two because she is grumpy, moody and ready to destroy everything. You need to set free your love from a slavery because that is the only way to get her back.