Week 11: A Skype Session With Seattle Institution Rob Morgan

Forget the songs and what we’re covering this week for a moment, because I introduced Rob “Capt.” Morgan to my students today. Don’t know, Rob? Well, picture a human hurricane, only infinitely funnier and more entertaining.

Rob, along with a few other self-described weirdos, basically created the Seattle punk rock scene out of thin air in the 1970s. When we had Lenny Kaye visit us a couple weeks back, he talked about how underground the NYC punk scene was back then. In New York, the only place to play original music was at a dump known as CBGB’s.

That being said, at least there was a dump to play at. And because it was New York, most of those bands got signed to major labels, like the Patti Smith Group, Ramones, Talking Heads, Television, and Blondie.

In contrast, there was nothing in Seattle and the major labels weren’t interested. The closest the Northwest punkers had to a club was the Bird, which existed for about six weeks in 1978 until the fire department shut it down. After that, the punk community rented halls wherever they could find to put on shows.

Rob has been in a bunch of bands, but his most memorable and long-running is the Squirrels, a band that does the most creative song mashups imaginable. In contrast to the Seattle stereotype of a bunch of cavemen playing grunge (and don’t get me wrong, I obviously love that stuff), Rob provides a broader picture of what really was happening in Seattle besides (and prior to) Sub Pop.

I don’t have enough space or time to get more into the Squirrels other than to tell you they combined Dave Brubeck’s “Take Five” with the Hawaii Five-0 theme song and called it “Hawaii Take Five-0.” You’ll have to read my book to find out the rest. I did a special chapter addendum on Rob and the Squirrels.

So Rob appeared in front of us at 12:20 pm ET, and I braced myself, because I knew my students have never experienced anyone like him. I knew he would blow them out of their seats. Rob did not disappoint.

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(A student, foreground, waits for Rob to answer a question)

A student asked Rob about what punk rock meant to him beyond leather jackets. Rob laughed and said he never owned one. Punk to him meant doing what you want, both musically and otherwise, being yourself and not playing to what you think the world wants.

Another student asked Rob about his most memorable gigs. Rob mentioned a late 1980s Squirrels show at the Rainbow Tavern (Seattle, University District.) The tables at the Rainbow were basically large round wooden spools. One of the patrons kept heckling the band to get the hell off stage or whatever. So after he went to the bathroom, Rob & Co. proceeded to haul the table, including the customer’s bottle of wine, up on stage.

After he returned, Rob said the customer did a double take reminiscent of a cartoon when he saw the space where his table had been (I can’t do Rob’s imitation justice in writing…suffice it to say it got the students cracking up.) The customer was about to respond harshly when he noticed Rob on stage downing the bottle of wine, and then immediately changed his demeanor. He laughed and told the band they had balls.

At a Bumbershoot gig (annual outdoor Labor Day weekend music festival at the Seattle Center), the Squirrels had accumulated a bunch of Cabbage Patch dolls (again, further described in my book) and decided to hook up surgical tubing between two mics. While the two Squirrels guitar players wailed on the “I Dream of Jeannie” theme, Rob pulled the tubing back as far as possible and began launching Cabbage Patch projectiles into the audience. Rob said that was the last time the Squirrels were invited to Bumbershoot for some reason. He also said he’s killed about 300 Cabbage Patch dolls in his career.

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(That’s Marshall not asking the Marshall question.)

Rob was wearing a Darkness shirt, so I felt compelled to get him talking about one of his favorite bands. That was a mistake, because he was relentless…I mean, now apparently I am required by law to go see them. Assessing the situation, one student checked out the band’s latest tour dates on her phone. They’re coming to Philadelphia (Troc) on April 18, she said. Rob couldn’t say enough things about them. He likens them to rock n roll’s last best hope…a band that hasn’t forgotten that the music is ultimately about fun.

Needless to say, Rob was great. One student emailed me afterward and said this: “I really enjoyed Rob today. Definitely the funniest guest we’ve had so far.” There you go.

A big thanks to Rob for doing this.