After some back-and-forth, a lot of editing, rewriting, formatting, proofreading, and spell-casting, my two-volume poetry collection is finally out there. It’s been Hell of a ride.

I would like to say that I have enjoyed all of it, but that was not entirely the case. There were days when I thought I will never get it finished, or just couldn’t get concentrated enough to work on it. But that’s ok. I did my best and tried to keep the goal clear in my mind. This was my first real project of author-hood and of course I expected the hardships. And I am greatly thankful for the support of my friends and family who kept me on the right track.

And then the books were finally out, and they rushed to the stores to buy their copies, even though I insisted it wasn’t necessary. But they were having none of it. So that left me with a mixed feeling of warm gratefulness and uncertain disquiet, and I waited uneasily for their opinions. Let me explain.

The people who have come into my life only in the past few years will not recognize me through this collection. It is dark, and it is sad, and full of emotions they have not yet seen in me. Or at least, to this degree. It presents a side of me they do not know. But that side is there and a valid part of me, even if it went dormant for the past couple of years.

So, for those interested, here is the story of why that collection is the way it is.

Unrequited Memories

The title came to me very soon after deciding to start this endeavor. It seemed more than fitting for the poems I’ve chosen to include in the collection. Unrequited love and heartbreak, memories of daydreams and secret wishes of the heart. The enveloping darkness, and the light I have found within. All of it, displaced into a time already passed, locked and nurtured only in my mind.

Volume IUnrequited Memories – Volume I

I started writing poems when I was a teenager. Being an introvert, I had a hard time navigating the world, and seeing how others managed so easily made me turn away even more. But I did find solace in quite a few things. Art, both my own and that of others, gave me the chance to express myself, to outline something I could identify with.

Gothic art and music spoke to me almost instantly. It was love at first sight. The play of shadows, the mystery within the darkness, the elegant details, the hidden depth behind the surface was more than alluring. Behind every piece of art, every line of lyric or poetry lay a whole world to be explored. And all of it under the cover of darkness and the spellbinding lure of the moon.

Even now I shudder to think of the endless possibilities this world holds. All the layers of emotion, felt to the deepest, brought forth and accepted in their entirety. A beautiful tragedy opening its petals to midnight.

The poems in this first volume are saturated with the trails of this fascination. The emotions presented are direct, strong and raw, the expressions of a young heart so willing to speak, and yet, so afraid to at the same time.

Volume IIUnrequited Memories – Volume II

A few years later I took to writing again. Time had passed, and I have seen more of the world. And I have started to understand my inner tickings as well. I could survey my romantic misfortunes with a calmer air.

The emotions became more nuanced and chiseled, concentrated not only in the feelings of the moment, but bore consequence and purpose. And my own stance in this whirlwind became more stable, foreshadowing a peace of mind that the eventual absence and its acceptance would bring.

And so, my memories I have lain down, and through these verses they will continue to live. And in the meantime, time did not stop, and I have moved on to another chapter of my life, this time something different and new.

So there you have it, a blink into my ever-twisting maze of a mind. And still, I must admit, my fascinations with all things dark still persist. The endless possibilities of what it can cover, the chance to reveal it shade by shade is exciting and exhilarating and thought provoking. You never know where the mere form of a shadow can take you. Me, it led me down various paths. Some of it I present in these two books, others I hope to present in works to come.