On today's episode of "Lyn lives in a decaying meat-sack and faces the horrors of entropy and time," guess who now has to get monthly injections directly in their eyeball to combat macular degeneration? The fun times just keep on rollin', folks; nothin' but parties all day long here!

(I'm fine, really. I have a full-time desk job, I'm on my meds, and I'm now in trauma therapy. I'm just a crotchety old biddy and I love to complain.)

I saw more movies than usual. I'm not a movie person (I walked out of Oppenheimer because it was so boring!), but the summer season, combined with months of unemployment, naturally led to more time spent in the theater (or in front of Netflix with a pug in my lap).

My parents and I watched Disney's "Saving Mr. Banks" (2013) together which, despite being corny historical revisionism, was still enjoyable for all of us due to stellar acting and sweet father/daughter sentiments. And speaking of historical revisionism, none of us enjoyed 2017's "The Greatest Showman." I usually love musicals (and Hugh Jackman), but I struggled to get into this one, especially knowing what a trashbag P. T. Barnum was in real life. "Hey, people with disabilities and deformities! Can I exploit and dehumanize you for profit and still be a likable protagonist?" (Answer: No.)

We liked "A Man Called Otto" (2022) a lot. It actually hit pretty hard, as someone who's struggled with mental illness and suicidal thoughts since I was ten years old. Sometimes it's so easy to forget that everyone impacts everyone, and the loss of one human life has such a ripple effect, even when that person believes themself to be alone; unloved.

Thing Three's entire class performed a stage adaptation of The Little Mermaid, so I went to his school to watch (Thing Three made a superb Grimsby), and then the next weekend we went to see the new Disney adaptation of the same story in theaters. Halle Bailey was gorgeous, and her chemistry with Dimples McGee — sorry, Prince Eric — was adorable. We also saw "Elemental," which was a lot cuter and more engaging than I expected. Were Thing Two and I ugly-crying at anthropomorphic fire falling for anthropomorphic water in a touching metaphor for interracial immigrant love? I'll never tell!

I'd been looking forward to the Barbie movie since the first trailer dropped, and it didn't disappoint (for me, anyway. I saw it with my mom and Sibling1, and they didn't like it nearly as much). It was a little "baby's first feminism," in that I felt I was being spoonfed concepts I've known and understood for years (yes, movie, I know society places the pressure of perfection on women while praising men for mere adequacy. Thank you for spelling it out, though!), but the jokes were funny, the sets/props were phenomenal, and Ryan Gosling stole the show.

I didn't want to mention seeing the remake of The Haunted Mansion, but Dad said that it would be "sad" not to. (Although I'm not sure why he cares, seeing as he stole my popcorn and then fell asleep in the theater. Head back, mouth open, zonked. At least he didn't snore.) It really didn't need to exist, but it had a good cast and a few funny moments. Danny Devito is always a win; Jared Leto can step on a Lego.

Season two of Good Omens dropped! I was leery to watch at first; after all, season one covered the entire book. What further story is there to tell? A freaking good one, as it turns out. I shouldn't have worried; Neil Gaiman's never let me down. So much of this season had me giggling and squealing in fangirl bliss, and you bet your biscuits I wrote fanfic once I was done watching. Very queer, very sweet. Dad thought it was too heavy on fluff, light on plot, but that didn't bother me. Who knew Jon Hamm was so hilarious?! I'm beyond excited for season three.

Speaking of book-to-TV adaptations, we finally watched Sharp Objects. You know a show is dark when it starts with a note reminding the audience to seek help if they're self-harming. I... Didn't like it much. The editing/pacing was weird and hard to follow, and the girl they cast to play Amma was too old for the role (the fact that she's thirteen is pivotal to her character!). While I halfheartedly tried to make Dad second-guess himself, he figured out all the twists pretty early on. Amy Adams is great in her role as Camille, but otherwise, this one fell flat; definitely a case of "the book did it better." At least I don't have to pay for HBO anymore. (Still paying for Crunchyroll, though.)

I haven't been reading very much since I got out of rehab. I just have no drive for it... I buy books, I stare at 'em, I don't read 'em. And when I do read 'em, I don't like 'em. But here's what I managed to get through this summer:

The Blackthorn Key by Kevin Sands was the first book that two of my nieces (Thing Two and Red Fish) chose to read for our newly formed book club. I... Did not care for it. It was a struggle just to get through the first one, and then my girls turned around and requested the sequel (Mark of the Plague) for our July meeting... SIGH. You can tell the author is a giant history nerd, so it was interesting to see the big focus on social/class dynamics of children, apprentices, business owners, political workers; the king vs the people vs the church... But it's just hard to care when everything is so bleak and everyone keeps getting murdered and 98% of the characters are mean (aka: all the reasons I hate Game of Thrones. Minus the sexual assault). While it might be accurate that adults were fine with beating kids, any kids, in the 1600s, it's still depressing to read hundreds of pages of, say, a 13-year-old orphan getting kicked in the chest by grown men until her ribs break. Not my idea of a good time, personally.

Pretty sure this was an instance of "it's not you, it's me," but I was a bit disappointed by Quietly Hostile: Essays by Samantha Irby. Maybe I'd just hyped it up too much in my head? Of course it was funny and sassy, and I liked a lot of the essays (the one about teenagers was hilarious), but a lot of it felt like it was retreading old ground, retelling stories from previous books (her dad's ashes, etc). I acknowledge this one is worth listening to a second time, to see if it was just my cranky mood at the time impacting my experience, or if it really is Not As Good as her other 3 books. I'd hoped there would be a little more focus on Irby's wife and stepkids (again, that chapter on teenagers was hilarious, but it focused on teens in general; not Irby's kids). I understand if she wants to keep her family's privacy, but it feels like she's written so much about her past, and very little about her current life. Just use pseudonyms, Samantha, please!

I really did not expect Paris Hilton's Paris: The Memoir to be so interesting, but it hooked me on page one. I didn't know Paris has clinically-diagnosed ADHD and PTSD, and I did not expect rape and pedophilia within the first few chapters, so that was painful. But most interesting was all of her writing focusing on the criminally abusive Troubled Teen Industry, which my mother attempted to enroll me into, back in 2009 (Sibling2 had to talk her out of it). Hearing Paris go into detail on the abuse, assault, mental torture, and murder that teens went through on the pretense of "straightening them out" was harrowing.

Celebs and pop culture are not things that I pour much thought into, so there were a lot of references and namedrops I didn't get (especially since they were a bit before my time... I was a mid-90s baby), and I definitely cannot relate to partying, sex, or being social, but the writing was engaging enough for it not to matter. I liked how it was so cemented in pop culture, showing the passage of time with specific references. That felt very appropriate for a book like this. Paris isn't someone I would ever want to hang out with, and whether she's a "good person" is debatable (the last-chapter apologies for all of her racism and homophobia felt very "my editor/agent made me write this"), but it's nice when someone who's been so demonized and slut-shamed has a chance to tell her side of things, and she's definitely spitting some hard truths about the rape culture and virgin/whore dichotomies we trap young girls in. Good book, Paris; you'll always be Amber Sweet to me.

I read This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar because I had to read a new sci-fi/fantasy release to complete Kindle's spring challenge, it was barely over 200 pages, and that whole silly debacle wherein one anime nerd on Twitter single-handedly launched this book onto the best-sellers list intrigued me. But... It was very much not my cup of tea. Was the writing beautiful? Absolutely! Was there any plot whatsoever? Nope! It doesn't surprise me that the author mostly works in poetry — just like with most poems, I was left wondering, "what was the point of all that???" and "is this actually going somewhere? Anywhere???" the whole time. So many pretty words used to describe absolutely nothing. If you want a story wherein gay otherworldly beings flirt over centuries of meddling in human affairs, just re-read Good Omens.

I bought my niece (Red Fish) some books I'd enjoyed as a child for her birthday, which sent me back down memory lane rereading The Ghost of Fossil Glen and its sequel by Cynthia C. DeFelice. I may have made a mistake in that they're a little young for Red Fish (who is now 12) — though she's pretty advanced for her age. I guess your mileage may vary, depending on whether your kid can handle concepts like child murder and animal abuse. Kid-me liked them, and I still like 'em now. They center around Allie, a pre-teen who is a bit of a ghost magnet; ghosts frequently come to her for help. Sometimes the ghosts are good and sympathetic. Sometimes they're evil liars. Sometimes they're dogs. Again: the books are quite simple and don't much beat around the bush, but as a kid I really enjoyed figuring things out with Allie, and feeling mildly spooked all the while. And you gotta love that late 90s cheese. I only re-read the first two before I felt satisfied; I didn't need to read all 4 books.

The last "Kindle Spring Challenge" was to read a book that had gone viral on Booktok... Unfortunately, Booktok sucks; full of Colleen Hoover and Sarah J Maas. But of all 86 titles, there was ONE I've been wanting to read... Crying in H Mart is Michelle Zauner's emotional autobiography about her messy relationship with her late mother, as well as her Korean heritage and the complications of being mixed race in both Korean and American settings. I think I'm just gonna have to accept that I'm Old now, because I really love autobiographies/memoirs. Anyway, I did enjoy it; it had a very strong beginning, but it kinda lost me after that. It meandered and lost its punch. Still good, though!

The timing of this book's release was serendipitous. I'd already pre-ordered the eBook for Mothered by Zoje Stage, and it turned out to be a book I needed for Kindle's summer challenge! Task? Read a "beach read." Since most of said beach reads were either bad mysteries or bad romances — and not the fun Lady Gaga kind — I was relieved to be able to read a bad... Whatever this was, instead. Okay, it's not fair calling this 'bad.' I enjoyed it immensely, just as I'd enjoyed Stage's "Baby Teeth." Sometimes I enjoyed making fun of it more than I enjoyed reading it, but the joy was there nonetheless. It's a thriller wherein mother and daughter survive the Covid-19 pandemic by moving in together... But this unearths some old traumas and quickly drives them both insane. You know from page one that someone murders someone; the rest of the book just unveils who did what, and why. Being a Zoje Stage book, weirdness ensues. (Also: apparently "Zoje" is pronounced "Zoya." Who knew?!)

I told you that I love memoirs! Pageboy by Elliot Page just came out... I'm kind of a Page fan. Every movie or show I've seen with him, I enjoyed (especially Umbrella Academy! And y'all know I'm a big X-Men fangirl). So I'm not sure why I didn't love this. Was the writing too simple and explicit, making me cringe a LOT? Was there too much sex, sexual assault, bodily excretions, and drugs? (Not that Paris's memoir DIDN'T have all that, but it wasn't uncomfortably graphic like this was.) Maybe it was the audiobook that was the problem? Elliot reads it himself, and his voice is so flat and monotone... Elliot, you're an actor! What the heck! — And it's not just the voice, but the text, too. Elliot lists all this bad stuff happening, with 0 emotion or commentary. Just: welp, this happened. Okay?? Anything to add??? Maybe I'm just jealous that Elliot has more romantic and sexual experience than I'm ever gonna get, and he's accepted his own gender/identity in a way that I'm far off from doing of my own? I definitely don't wanna examine that too closely, so... Elliot, I'm happy for your journey and coming out, I'm glad things have gotten better for you, I'm sorry you've been through so much trauma... And I'm sorry I didn't love your book.

When I told my nieces that I couldn't stand to read about children being abused in 1600s London anymore, Thing Two suggested we read about children being abused in 1960's Berlin, instead. A Night Divided by Jennifer A. Nielsen was our third bookclub book, and I liked it a lot. I guess I never knew much about the Berlin Wall; why it existed or for how long, or the dangers of trying to cross it. (I didn't pay much attention in history class, okay?) This book humanizes the facts by focusing on a tween girl's experience on the impoverished east side, trapped by Russian communists as her father and brother narrowly escape to the more liberated west. On fear of death, she contends with secret police, hidden cameras in her own home, propaganda, censorship, fake friends, dead teenagers... It all feels very dystopian/sci-fi, but apparently this is real stuff that happened! Occasionally the preachy nature of children's lit started to drag — no, child, you don't need to feel bad about stealing a shovel, and you definitely don't have to pray for the police who are actively threatening your life — but overall it was very interesting, and inspired me to research more into Cold War happenings. Hey, kids, learning is fun!

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants by Ann Brashares was something I read back in '05 when the movie first came out (America Fererra being one of my first celebrity crushes!), and was inspired to re-read when Dad and I watched a 3am game of women's soccer, because neither of us is good at sleeping. On reread... Yeah, these books are really good, the writing is excellent, the relationships between these four best friends feels authentic and warm. But the "romances..." Oof. We've got Statutory Rape: the Slowburn! that Eric tries to justify with "you're too sexy and young for me!" (but I raped you, a mentally ill child, anyway, and I really really hope you won't tell the police!). How... Romantic? Barf! And we've got Kostos and Lena, aka "we have zero chemistry and barely interact, but suddenly we're in love, I guess." I remember teen-me liking Tibby and Brian, so I guess if I reread the rest of the books, I'll see if I still like 'em. Problematic "romances" aside, I did enjoy this, even if every word out of Eric's mouth made me contemplate homicide.

Speaking of contemplating homicide! Really Good, Actually by Monica Heisey was... Difficult. It's been a minute since I've been so annoyed by a protagonist. It's about a 28-year-old Canadian who gets divorced... And that's it; that's the plot. Cue several hundred pages of her wallowing in despair and insulting anyone who has the misfortune to care about her well-being while making the worst life decisions possible. This woman has absolutely no self awareness, and it was hard to read. Speaking as a crazy person who also wallows in despair: I am at least aware of when I'm being obnoxious! When my friends are mad at me, I usually know why! So it was very frustrating to read about someone so relatable and yet so stupid about it. You can't treat people like this, Maggie. And her constant obsessing over her appearance also made me want to slap her. I think the author was trying to write a contemporary "this is what it's like to be a modern woman!" narrative, but like... No, it's not? Like Maggie, I too am a queer white woman, and I too ruin all my relationships. But gott in himmel, please tell me I'm not this annoying!

Yeah... I think it's time to give up on author Lucinda Berry, because the A Welcome Reunion novella pissed me off big-time. It's a follow-up to her "The Perfect Child," a basic "family adopts evil child. Evil child is Evil. Oh No" story. I can't say much on WHY this made me so mad without spoiling it, sadly, but it had the same conclusion as her "Saving Noah" book did, and it didn't sit with me right THEN, either! Therapists saying that their patients are "beyond help"? Um, ew??? Suggesting they stop "sociopaths" from having kids/passing their genes down? Okay, eugenicist. I have a cluster-B personality disorder with a heavy stigma, and it sucks! It SUCKS to be talked about like you're a problem to be solved. This author used to be a PSYCHIATRIST, for crying out loud. This is what she actually thinks about people like me?! (Also this novella was clearly rushed and badly written. I sent a few of the worst metaphors to my friend so we could laugh about it, because honestly! Did she write this in five minutes while sitting on the toilet?!) I wanted a follow-up to Janie's story; not some rushed trash about everyone BUT Janie.

The Other Mrs. Miller by Allison M. Dickson was pretty mid-tier. I enjoyed the first three quarters, which is more than I expected; a "wealthy yet unhappy wine-guzzling white woman notices that things are Amiss, but nobody believes her" thriller is a dime a dozen, but the first of several twists actually surprised me and added some freshness to the tropes. Towards the end, though, I started getting bored again. If you like this kind of book, you'll enjoy this one; if you don't, it won't change your mind.

T. Kingfisher, my beloved! Thornhedge is her newest yarn; a short fairytale with Sleeping Beauty origins, though of course she takes it in her own direction with Irish folklore and Muslim heroes. Toadling was such a lovable protagonist. And she was a greenteeth! I don't see a lot of those in fairy lore, for some reason. Honestly, Kingfisher never misses; there was no doubt that I'd love this. If you like classic fairy-tales with a twist, I highly recommend you check this little novella out.

I am so, so beyond thankful for Big Swiss by Jen Beagin, because it reminded me of why I love reading so much. This book was good stuff. Everything I love; fantastically written capital-L Literature about unhinged, dysfunctional queer women with bucketloads of unresolved trauma. Thank you for getting me out of my reading rut. I stayed up all night to read this thing, because I couldn't put it down. Not to be mean, but this book achieved what "Really Good, Actually" failed to convey. The writing was just excellent; the kind of thing I aspire to write. So creative, so funny. Very few things make me laugh out loud, but I highlighted every other paragraph, it felt like, and some lines hit me like a truck. I LOVE WORDS. I LOVE ART. I've read 70 books this year (so far!) and only 4 of them have made it onto my "best of 2023" list, but this one shot onto that list immediately. Time to stalk this author and consume everything she's ever written!

I picked my way through My Hero Academia volumes 13-21, and I've finally caught up to (and surpassed) where I stopped watching the anime a couple years ago. (Since I'm terminally online, however, I know most of the major spoilers for the whole series. Luckily, spoilers never bother me.) I don't really have much to say about this series that I didn't say in my last blog post... It kind of feels like Horikoshi has toned down the sexism (or maybe I'm just numbed to it)? I was talking with some friends about whether Bakugo is a "redeemable" character... I find that he is, specifically because he's fifteen, and he does learn and grow as the series progresses. If Horikoshi is good at one thing, it's drawing parallels between protagonists, antagonists, and villains, showing that everybody is two sides of the same coin; that, under different circumstances, our heroes might have become villains, and vice versa. The parallels between Bakugo and Endeavor really showcase what he could — and is trying not to — become. Good stuff.