Someone recently shared with me the Lana Turner quote “A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.” I’d never heard this one before, and it gave me some food for thought. There are a number of ways to interpret this quote, especially within the context of D/s, so I thought I’d mull it over a bit and then throw it out to the comments section to see what you all thought. 

At first glance, there’s a cynical (yet understandable) matter-of-factness to the expression. The implication is that all men are inherently wolves—dangerous, feral, threatening—and that a gentleman is a wolf who knows how to temper these urges slightly better than their counterparts. Although reductive, we can find the echoes of this sentiment in the “man or bear” question that’s been making the rounds for the past year or so.

But if we peel back the onion a bit and look at the expression through a D/s lens, I would argue there’s a different tack we could take here. Perhaps the wolf’s characteristics aren’t dangerous, feral, and threatening, but rather cunning, intelligent, and determined. And when we add “patient” to the mix, this wolf is a sublime manifestation of all that is dominant. He commands respect, he won’t be ignored, he will be obeyed…and he will outlast you no matter how long you resist him. Hmmm…

In all fairness, I’m not so sure that Ms. Turner would agree with this second interpretation, but at least we can engage in some healthy debate about our patient, gentlemanly wolves. 

What’s your take on the expression? I’d love to hear your thoughts!