https://www.amazon.com/Building-Novel-12-Steps-Discovery-ebook/dp/B0FSHQ9QF1?ref

Chapter 11

Step 11: Detail Work: Polishing Language and Character

You’ve built the structure. You’ve created a cohesive story. Now it’s time for the detail work that transforms a functional manuscript into a compelling one. This is your third revision—where good writing becomes good storytelling.

Think of this phase as adding the elements that make a house a home. The walls are up; the roof doesn’t leak, but now you’re installing the beautiful staircase, the perfect light fixtures, the crown molding that makes each room distinctive.

Here’s what to focus on in your third draft:

Powerful Dialogue: Good dialogue does multiple things simultaneously—it reveals character, advances the plot, creates subtext, and sounds authentic. Review your conversations with these questions:

· Does each character have a distinctive voice?

· Is the dialogue free of unnecessary exposition? We do not want that.

· Does the subtext (what’s not being said but exists just beneath the surface) create tension?

· Have you cut small talk and mundane exchanges?

Try this exercise: Take a crucial dialogue scene and rewrite it three different ways—one where both characters are honest, one where both are hiding something, and one where they have completely different understandings of the conversation. Even if you don’t use these versions, they’ll help you find the most compelling approach.

Deepening Characterization: By now, you know your characters well. Use that knowledge to add layers:

· Give important characters distinctive habits, expressions, or perspectives

· Ensure secondary characters have their own motivations, not just serving the protagonist

· Add moments of internal contradiction—people are rarely consistent

· Show characters through the eyes of others for a fuller picture

· Create moments where characters surprise the reader, yet remain true to themselves

Scene Dynamics: Each scene should have its own arc of tension and release. For important scenes, identify:

· The power dynamics at the beginning and how they shift

· The goals of each character in the scene

· The obstacle or conflict that creates tension

· How the scene changes the story situation

· The emotional impact on both characters and readers

Emotional Impact: This is where many technically competent manuscripts fall short. For pivotal moments, ask:

· Have you earned this emotional beat through proper setup?

· Are you allowing readers to feel the emotion rather than just describing it?

· Have you varied emotional notes throughout ?

· Are you using physical sensations to convey feeling?

· Have you avoided melodrama and sentimentality?

For each important emotional scene, identify the primary emotion you want readers to feel. Then, make sure not to name that emotion directly in the scene. Show everything around it, but let readers supply the label themselves.

Setting as Character: Bring your locations to life:

· Appeal to all five senses, not just the visual, when describing…

· Show how settings reflect or contrast with characters’ emotions

· Make settings dynamic—changing with weather, time, circumstances

· Use settings to create mood and atmosphere

· Include specific, vivid details that only someone who’s been there would know

I definitely think of Eden, the town, in my series Strangely Scary Funny as a character. If your setting is important (as it is in fantasy, horror, and sci fi in particular) consider thinking of it as a character when you’re bringing it to life.

Language Precision: Now’s the time to make every word count:

· Replace generic verbs (“walked,” “said,” “looked”) with more specific ones when it adds value

· Cut adjectives and adverbs when strong nouns and verbs can do the work

· Vary sentence structure and length for rhythm and emphasis

· Eliminate pet phrases and words you overuse

· Make metaphors and similes fresh and relevant to your story world

Beginnings and Endings: Polish the most important parts of your novel:

· Does your opening immediately engage with character, conflict, and/or question?

· Does your ending provide emotional satisfaction while reflecting the journey of your story?

· Have you cut unnecessary preamble or epilogue? Watch out for this, especially in the beginning.

The Rule of Three: In storytelling, three is a magic number. Important concepts, images, or phrases often benefit from appearing three times throughout your manuscript—first introducing, then developing, finally culminating. Look for opportunities to create these patterns.

The Unexpected Turn: Review each chapter for predictability. Where can you add a twist, revelation, or surprise that keeps readers engaged?

Clarity Check: Make sure readers will understand what’s happening without being spoon-fed:

· Have beta readers or an editor identify confusing passages/ these are often hard for the author to identify.

· Clarify without over-explaining

· Make sure important information stands out from background details

This level-of-detail work is demanding, but it’s also deeply satisfying. You’re no longer wrestling with big structural problems—you’re crafting moments, creating beauty, adding depth.

Don’t try to perfect everything at once. You might go through the whole manuscript or sections focusing on one aspect, such as dialogue or description (adding sensory details, which almost always helps), or emotional beats or what’s at stake in a scene.

By the end, your manuscript should feel like a real book—one that pulls readers in and keeps them engaged from beginning to end. You’ve moved from builder to craftsperson. Your novel isn’t just standing; it’s taking on character and charm.

There’s just one more step to go.