C'mon. You like to mock them as much as I do. Those classic titles made for America's SyFy channel that usually air here in Canada on Space. Classic titles like END OF THE WORLD, PIRANACONDA, and MEGAPYTHON vs. GATOROID. Movies that give us implausible plots that would never ever happen. Until Friday.


Friday was the day the world's top scientists didn't see the asteroid heading towards earth, crashing through the atmosphere at a mega speed that caused sonic booms to knock out glass in Chelyabinsk injuring somewhere between 250 and 1000 people. I know that's a big difference in casualties but maybe something got lost in the translation. What if SCIENCEGEEK #2 really did have the satellite feed turned to the porn channel on his watch and lo and behold all hell broke loose. Apparently it could happen.
Those events are a SyFy movie waiting to happen. I`m working on a title for the script now. ATTACK OF THE COSMOSPHERE or maybe RETURN OF THE COLD WAR. I mean, that`s what happened to the dinosaurs, right? The giganta rock falls from the sky and then whamo ... total extinction, or at least ninety minutes worth.
Some of the movies are filmed on the West Coast, and you can usually tell those ones because the catastrophic events hit the eastern seaboard of our continent, or South America. We don`t like to kill our own. Every once and a while the funding goes to an eastern prodco and Seattle takes a hit. Unless there are zombies. Zombies to try to head to Canada. I don't know why this is.


Maybe that`s why Canada`s Foreign Minister John Baird stood up in Parliament and announced that zombies were a no-go zone in Canada.
"I rise today to salute the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta and the province of Quebec for putting in place emergency measures to deal with the possibility of an invasion of zombies," Martin said. "I do not need to tell you, Mr. Speaker, that zombies do not recognize borders and that a zombie invasion in the United States could easily turn into a continent wide pandemic if it is not contained."


He continued: "On behalf of concerned Canadians everywhere, I want to ask the Minister of Foreign Affairs — is he working with his American counterparts to develop an international zombie strategy, so that a zombie invasion does not turn into a zombie apocalypse?"

Yes, he really said that. Just this week. Who says politicians aren't insightful?


I like to think that what our elected official was really trying to say is that we should be prepared in case, you know, a flesh-eating type of disease meets a SARS-like virus that creates an uncontrollable hunger and we`re all really in trouble. But that`s as likely to happen as space debris hitting Russia, right?


Maybe we all had better pay a little more attention to those crazy flicks. Somehow the earth seemed safer last week.