Lately, I’ve been feeling more and more embarrassed of being a man.

No, I didn’t pee my pants in public, nor did I randomly hug a stranger on the street mistakenly thinking he was my childhood friend.

I’m simply embarrassed of my existence. And the world makes sure to drill this fact in my brain every single day. Morning, evening, and mostly in the night.

I think I did everything right. I studied in a co-ed and sat with guys all decade long. I went to college, fell in love, and pampered my girl like any reasonably minded guy would do. I’ll get married, be responsible for my family, work my bottom off to provide for my children, and eventually die in peace knowing that I never groped or raped anyone.

But unfortunately that won’t be possible. That’s a long lost dream. Because I’ve been labelled a rapist by millions of women over the years to a point where I try to look back and wonder if I actually did commit any such crime.

I’m part of a social media generation. The middle class Indian who spent most of the last decade obsessed with what’s being talked about on Facebook and Twitter.

For me, the most shared article on ScoopWhoop held more importance than the front page news in the Times of India. And twice more importance than whatever Arnab thought India wanted to know that day.

Posts, videos, tweets, comments, and images that I read every single day reveal some interesting facts about me.

Men are…

Honestly speaking, I had to Google the meanings of Misogyny and Chauvinism after I had seen hundreds of comments about me being one. Yay, for better vocabulary. Nay, for making me wonder if I actually was those things.

I was as shocked as the dear old grannie next door when I heard about the Delhi bus rape. That started the wave of women safety online. I admire all the articles and videos and tweets and comments that stand up for women safety. I admire the courage of people to fight the administration for the rights of women. I admire Shenaz for calling out the influential people in our country to develop stricter laws. I truly do.

I don’t admire you for calling ME a rapist.

0.1% of the men on this planet could be labelled as molesters and sexual offenders. Why label the other 99.9% of us the same?

And those 0.1% are the Criminal Men or CMen. So if you want to talk about them, you explicitly state you’re talking about the CMen. (no pun intended)

It makes me feel like all the honesty, respect, kindness, silly jokes, and puppy eyes, that I’ve bestowed upon females all my life… ’twas all for nothing.

An article gets shared on Facebook that raises an important point about women safety, and I start reading it. Somewhere in the article, or in the comments, a line of similar stature would come up:

“Shame on you men. Why do you rape us? You are disgusting.”

(This is not quoted from an actual source, but you understand what I’m trying to say)

After reading that line, all my positive energy just drains away and I become a slobbering pile of mess beating my head trying to remember when I committed such a heinous crime.

I’ll be honest with you. I like girls. They are the most beautiful thing I’ll ever see in my lifetime. Without them, us men would be a stinking pile of mess. No, really. You should visit a boys hostel dorm-room sometime.

What many people don’t realize is that the articles, videos, and comments being shared online won’t ever be read by the actual CMen. They don’t have Facebook accounts nor do they take selfies and post it to Instagram after applying the ‘Toaster’ filter.

Most of the horrid crimes committed in this lovely country are the courtesy of uneducated twerps who have nothing better to do in their lives. Who don’t have access to porn to let out their frustrations. Who don’t read/speak the language that you and I are so comfortable with. So why the outrage on social networks? Why these Youtube videos telling me that I’m a rapist?

I’m the man who will open the door for you, cover you with my jacket when its cold, ask you out on a date, hold your hand when you’re afraid, make you laugh when you’re least expecting it, look you in the eye and tell you you’re the prettiest thing I’ve seen in my life, give you a ring and commitment to spend a lifetime with you.

I’m the man who will father your children, go out of my way to give you a comfortable life, guide you and console you when you’re down, be the logical one when you’re being the emotional one, help you with cooking, and protect you when the time comes.

I’m the man who will do everything you wanted your man to do for you. And them some. So, am I the same man who raped you?

I’m a man, and I’m embarrassed of being one.

About The Author

Ritoban Chakrabarti is an entrepreneur, author, internet marketer, and bathroom singer. His debut novel, When She Smiled, was released in December 2014 and is an Amazon Bestseller. He is a freedom fanatic and an avid traveller.