Sports from Hell: My Search for the World's Most Outrageous Competition

by Rick Reilly

Bestselling author and ESPN star, Rick Reilly delivers a hilarious, unabashedly fun, and at times, skin-searing tour through some of the world’s most amazing and outrageous sports
 
From the physically and mentally taxing sport of chess boxing to the psychological battlefield that is the rock-paper-scissors championship, to the underground world of illegal jart throwing, Rick Reilly subjected himself to both bodily danger and abject humiliation (or, in the case of ferret legging, both) in order to personally find the world's strangest sporting event. Chronicling his adventures as only he can, Rick enters a world of bizarre characters, fierce competition, and exotic locals--with stops in Australia, New Zealand, Finland, Denmark, England, and even a maximum security prison at Angola, Louisiana--and the result is a laugh-out-loud book perfect for any sport’s fan.

Genres: Sports, Humor, Nonfiction, Essays, Adult

224 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2010

Reviews

[Frank · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good beach read. Some of the “sports” are dated, but that is not important. Rick Reilly can write in a style that emphasizes sports and the characters with a humorous touch.

[Adam Nelson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reilly's sense of humor is tasteful and optimistic, even when he's covering stuff that is far from the former, as with the chapter on drinking games. I laughed out loud frequently while reading this book. Reilly has a gifted ability to raise the lowbrow to something Shakespearean with his elevated and witty prose. The premise may be a little off-putting; on the surface, it appears as if he's shining a light on these sports and their participants only to ridicule them, but if you know anything about Rick Reilly, you know that he is humble when he needs to be, willing to point the finger back at himself as frequently, if not more so, as his subjects. And the chapter on homeless soccer ends the book on a very uplifting note and reveals what sports, whether "dumb" or not, are really all about. Well worth the time.

[Jess · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just to be clear, this would be getting five stars if the author wasn’t homophobic/sexist/kind of a pig. But that’s straight men for ya.

Never did I ever think I’d be reading a book by a sports journalist and loving it, but love it I did. Sure, there were references I didn’t get and the baseball section made my eyes glaze over. But there was so much interesting stuff in this book - and so much insanity - and I was in literal tears laughing at the chess boxing chapter.

The prison rodeo - utterly bonkers. Utterly American. The sauna championships and the bursting boils, good grief! And the homeless football section was actually really poignant.

If Reilly wrote another book like this one I’d snap it up. And hopefully his views have changed a little since 2007.

[Ellis · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh. Not as funny as I thought it would be. There are some weird shadings that make some of the stories uncomfortable - the ferret legging isn't very funny once some woman gets horribly bitten, for instance. Prison rodeo is okay if you can suspend your disbelief & care about the rodeo adventures of some convicted murderers, but at the end Reilly gets the reaction of one of the victim's fathers, which kind of deflates the whole thing: "I didn't know that someone who raped & murdered an innocent person would get to ride in a rodeo." The three mile golf hole is pretty cool, though.

[Scott · Rating 2 out of 5]

I used to like Rick Reilly quite a bit when he wrote the Point After for Sports Illustrated. Which is why I thought this would be a nice listen on a long road trip. While there were classic Reilly moments and the usual spate of pop culture references, on the whole he comes across as kind of an a-hole. Which is too bad. Some of the sports he covers are interesting. Others are not really sports at all. But what could have been a good time was partly spoiled for me by Reilly's attitude about most of what he saw and participated in.

[Harrison Rip · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reilly is a TERRIBLE writer, but the content he covers is fascinating. So, if you can ignore the bad jokes and go for the incredible stories, I recommend this for anyone who likes weird niche events.

[Carolyn Binder · Rating 1 out of 5]

Love Rick Reilly’s humor in his golf books and was really looking forward to this one. It was a dud. As a woman in the sports broadcasting field I was particularly off put by the chapter on women in pro football. I’m all for humor but that entire chapter was demeaning.

[Steve Nelson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was going to give this 3stars because of the sport of “Drinking Games,” but then I got to the chapter on Baseball and his roasting of the game was worth several extra stars! Fortunately baseball has rectified most of his complaints about random glove adjustments and infinite throws to first and so forth, since he wrote this book.

I read Reilly’s two books about the small municipal golf course in the shadow of the Country Club and laughed myself silly with them. This book was more random facts and funny observations of obscure things that people do for the sake of competition. Why did someone think you should play 4 minutes of chess, then hop up and box each other for a round before sitting down for more chess? Who thought of stuffing a ferret into tightly secured sweat pants. What motivates a prison rodeo participant to try and grab a coin worth $500 from between a charging bull’s horns? What will happen when the last Jart is broken? They have been banned since 1988, so the supply is dwindling.

Reilly finds a personal side in almost every case that helps you understand. The strangest, and surprisingly most touching, was the Homeless World Cup. The teams from a couple dozen countries sent actual homeless people to compete in Denmark. How do you create a team? They don’t have a phone tree or address. It seems silly on the face of it, until Reilly tells several personal tales, including one player that had never slept under a roof, on a bed, or seen water come from a tap. The incredible part was that the organizers had provided a reason for nearly all the players in previous years to reverse their fortunes and provided more good than simply giving them a housing voucher for a month. Belonging to something made all the difference for these people. Of course, they never did discover the next Messi or CR7, or anyone that could have made the city park pickup league, but they changed their lives.

There is still a lot to learn about what motivates people.

[Dashiell Tillery · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dashiell Tillery
Period 2
5/16/18

Sports From Hell by Rick Reilly
Sports From Hell by Rick Reilly is a humorous, compelling, and intriguing novel that describes a sports writer’s journey to find the stupidest sport ever. When I first discovered this book I was tentative at first, but after reading the first chapter all timidity was gone and I was sucked into this funny yet interesting story of his path. This book is split up into different chapters that each pertain to a different sport that he discovered and each provide a new and refreshing storyline to follow. The book takes place over two years in multiple continents. Throughout the book he tries really crazy sports from ferret legging to chess boxing and provides interesting explanations of other too dangerous sports. The author is accompanied by his girlfriend (referred to as TLC in the book) and in select chapters, his sons.
As the story progressed I felt more and more connected to the characters and their emotions and I felt like I really knew them by the end of the book. Another great thing about this book is that it never gets boring. During one of the chapters the author talks about the international rock paper scissors championships and I never got bored for a second. He was able to make me interested in something that isn't that interesting in the first place. The pacing of the story was was a little slow but I felt that it was like that because the book often is like a collection of short stories. Therefore I think that the pacing puts more emphasis on its specific chapter better. All in all I think that this is a great book to read because of its humor and overall storyline.

[Adrian · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am obsessed with people that devote their lives to “side quests”, particularly board games or arcade games. I think the dedication to spending so much of your free time and life on a pursuit that at the absolute maximum level pays like $3,000 is really fascinating, so I picked this up hoping to find more of that. And the book does absolutely provide that content. However, it’s an older book and the humor is absolutely rooted in “early 2000s sports writer” and that does kill the current readability of it. The author cannot help but mention the exact number of women at any event and whether they’re attractive. One chapter is about Ferret Legging (you put a ferret down your pants with no underwear for two minutes). With all he could have asked the provider of the ferrets or anything he could say about her, just commented that she was fairly attractive. Surely her role mattered more than that. He was particularly obsessed with how many of the Women’s Pro Football team were lesbian and chronicled their relationships more than the game. Very many a gay joke throughout. I’d be intrigued to see if sports writing has matured more at this point, but if that part isn’t a dealbreaker then this book delivers the premise. Also Chess Boxing is the best sport in this book and I NEED to see a game.

[morris elliott · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you came across a book that had a picture of a laughing man getting an actual ferret stuffed down his sweat pants on the cover, what would you do? You look at the title and start reading that sucker is what! I'm familiar with Rick Reilly from his Sports Illustrated days and some of his other work for ESPN. I've read most of his books and find him to be clever and pretty funny. This book was hilarious. He recounts how he and his girlfriend set out on a quest to find the dumbest and often dangerous competitions world wide. Here are a few of them: FERRET LEGGING. Nude BICYCLING. WORLD SAUNA CHAMPIONSHIPS. HOMELESS SOCCER. JARTS. ( Did you know lawn darts were banned by the feds in 1988? True shit. I totally forgot that fact.) BULL POKER. CHESS BOXING and more. Thousands of people were competing in stuff like this worldwide in the 2000's when the book was written. He cracks wise on a lot of the participants but he ultimately makes them very human and likable. It's all pretty silly, but very funny. The Homeless Soccer chapter might even make you tear up a little. This is a fun, breezy read. Read it. As for me, I gotta hit up the Dark Web and find me some lawn darts because my grand kids are Soft and should learn about their idiot grandfathers killer toy experiences.

[TJ · Rating 4 out of 5]

First of all, the sports in the title of "Sports from Hell" should be italicized because they really aren't what purists think of as sports. Don't let that get in the way of a fun reading experience for you though. In thirteen rapidly moving chapters, Reilly exposed his readers to a variety of activities - most, I'm guessing you've (like me) never heard of. A sampling of the "sports" include Chess Boxing, Zorbing, Bull Poker, and Ferret Legging. The intrepid sportswriter takes all of these 13 sports on with varying levels of success, but lots of good stories for his readers.
If you're a fan of Reilly's books and writing style, then "Sports from Hell" is for you!

[Kyle Thompson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pretty good, but it ran out of steam about halfway. Chapters 8 and 9 broke the rules the author set. They weren't about real sports. "Drinking Games" was just about drinking games. "Zorbing" was about a collection of unrelated semi-extreme hobbies. The baseball chapter was a good joke, but not much else. "Nude Bicycling" was also a cheat.

In short, two-thirds of the book were about searching for the world's dumbest sport. The other third was an excuse to write essays about some some dumb stuff.

[Scott Donaldson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dumb is in the eye... Along with a Jart.

Great, great bunch of tales. The chapters and the tales they contain are alternately funny, ironic, sad blizzard and inspirational. Some of these sports you wouldn't play if they'd pay you. Some were created for people totally UNLIKE you. There are even some that evoke some admiration. Read it. Read it soon ! !

[Brian Sexton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a bad book, but his attempts at humor (some successful and some not) interrupts the flow of reading it. That being said, it is interesting learning about these different sports and the final chapter on homeless soccer puts a lot in perspective. If you need a book to read, you can do worse than this one.

[Adam Foster · Rating 2 out of 5]

Would be higher, but deducted a full point for the pointless anti-baseball rant in the middle. Must have been included as a filler, because it had no place in book about bizarre sports.Plus he all but plagiarized George Carlin in that chapter as well.

[Stan Finger · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reilly is a gifted writer and long one of my favorites at Sports Illustrated. This collection showcases his talent.

Many of the stories seemed too long for me, though individual tastes will vary. I can't believe some of the stunts he got involved with, but then, that is the point of the book.

[Jan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Extremely funny and entertaining! My husband and I listened to this on a cross country trip.

[Julie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was expecting obscure silly “sports” and got a little of that but a chapter on baseball? Women’s pro football? Drinking games? Yuck!

[Dennis Doucette · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rick Reilly is a great storyteller. He is very funny and dives deep into the crazy world of dumb sports in only the way he can.

[Sidney · Rating 2 out of 5]

Was forced to listen to this on a road trip. So stupid. I grimaced once and rolled my eyes a thousand times.

[Adam N.]

Sports From Hell:
A Mans Quest to Find the Dumbest Sports Competition
What would you do if you found a contest to see who could keep a large
rat in their pants the longest? Well in Rick Rielly’s Sports From Hell this is the case.
Rick goes to various parts of the country and explores some of the wackiest sports games
and competitions known to man. Some of these include The World Santa Championship
and Chess Boxing. This book takes place all across the United Sates of America. The
main character in this book is Rick Reilly. The genre of this book would be best
classified as informational. May rating of the book would be 3.345 stars out of 5. This is
a good book worth reading because, it has lots of humor, funny stories and reasons that
inspire you not to try any of these sports competitions.
One of the reasons that Sports From Hell is a good book is because it has lots of
humor. One of these examples is when he is playing women’s professional football. The
text says, “’Stunt Monkey!’ they’ll (the women’s pro football team) holler, which
basically translates to: Let’s hit this guy so hard snot bubble come from out of his nose”
(87). As I was reading this portion of the story all I could do was laugh at the fact that he
was going to get bashed in a man’s sport by a bunch of women. That is why I thought
that this book was very humorous.
The second reason why this was a good is because it has lots of funny stories. One
of these humorous stories is called chess boxing. In this wacky sport two contestants box
for one round and then they play chess for fifteen minutes. In this game you can win one
of two ways, by knocking out your opponent in the ring or winning the game of chess.
The text says, “Does that make any sense? The sport was never intended to be a sport in
the first place. It was a piece of performance art by a Dutchman named Iepe Rubingh”
(102)I thought that this was a funny sport just because of the nature of it. I did not
understand why two people would do such a thing, but as I read through the chapter I
realized that this sport truly is both humorous and stupid.
The final reason why Sports From Hell is a good book is because although it has a lot of very wacky sports it discourages you from trying most of them. Although these sports are very dangerous there is a warning in each chapter that basically says try at your own discretion. The text says, “Doesn’t make it right, only makes it slightly less dumb” (119). I thought that this was a very interesting quote. I thought that this was good for the sake of the book. That is the final reason why I thought Sports From Hell.
Sports From Hell is a good book worth reading because, it has lots of humor,
funny stories and reasons that inspire you not to try any of these sports competitions.
I enjoyed this book for all of those reasons. My connection to the book is that I have no connection to the book and I think that if I were to try any of these outrageously crazy sports that they would be a detriment to my health.
Overall on this assignment I worked very hard, and I think that I deserve an A on the book review. The easy part for me was doing the typing however the hardest part of this assignment for me was doing all of the thinking that needed to be done. if I could improve on this paper I would have gotten better quotes and probably added more of them.

[Derrick Scott · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm only halfway through this one and already give 5 stars because every chapter makes me lol. For me, humor is usually a visual thing. So finding an hilarious book is a rare treat.

[Tom Gase · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another great book from the best sportswriter alive. I found the first 100 pages of this book so funny, that a couple times I had to leave the coffee shop because I was laughing so much and didn't want to disturb anyone. Reilly's sentences describing funny situations are better than anyone, and he makes you feel as if you were actually there watching these dumb events like Bull-Poker, Chess Boxing, Beer Games, Girl Football, Jarts and Feret Legging. Although Reilly has written one of the most hilarious books I've ever read, he gets serious on the last sport--homeless soccer. I would give this book five stars like all his other ones, except that I actually like baseball, which Reilly lists as one of the dumbest sports. That being said, Reilly has some valid points on why the sport CAN be boring at times. His argument is mostly that the sport takes too long. My counter argument is who goes to any event voluntarily and can't wait to leave? Who are these people? Where do they come from? Mars? Anyway I do agree with him that Gary Sheffield is a moron and that relief pitchers should not be given eight warmup pitches when they enter a game.

Rick, keep writing them and I'll keep reading them. If by any chance YOU are reading this, I'm the one that told you that you are my generation's Jim Murray when you signed this book in Westwood. I recommend this book to anyone, you don't even have to be a sports fan to enjoy this. Can't wait for his next one, whenever it is.

[Paul Pessolano · Rating 3 out of 5]

Rick Reilly has been voted National Sportswriter of the Year, eleven times!!!!! He has been a senior writer for Sports Illustrated, and is currently a columnist for ESPN.com. He has written several books including the New York Times bestselling , "Who's Your Caddy?.

In "Sports from Hell" Reilly has searched the globe for the world's stupidest idea of a sporting competition. He traveled to eight countries over three and a half years in this quest.

To give substance to his endeavors he set up certain criteria for the sport.

1. It had to be an actual sport.
2. It couldn't be stupid for the sake of being stupid.
3. It couldn't exist mainly as tourist bait.
4. He had to actually watch people do it.
5. It couldn't even be slightly famous.
6. He didn't want to die covering it.
7. It couldn't have already been covered.
8. It had to at least resemble a sport.

Some of the sports he covered:

Bull Poker - actually played in Angola State Prison where 85% of the prisoners are serving life sentences.

Women's Pro Football - and you thougt the NFL was tough.

Jarts - banned, but there is an annual Jarts contest held illegally every year.

Baseball - just wait until you hear what he has to say abour our "National Pastime"

Homeless Soccer - this may surprise you and warm your heart.

Any sport enthusiast will love this book, not only for its absurdity, but its laugh out fun.

[Richard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bought and read on the advice of my son, it is not your typical sport story. It is, instead, stories of 13 different sporting events which take place around the world. The author took three years traveling from one event to another, and participating in these events. Some were really different, such as the Nude Bicycling, the World Sauna Championship (where participants willingly bake themselves to see who can stay in temperatures of about 270 degrees the longest, and where this year one participant died from the heat and burns) and Jarts champtionship which is held here in Ohio. Found out that Jarts are now banned since too many people have been killed with them in the pastt.

What is great about this book is that each chapter is totally independent of the others, meaning they may be read in any order and at any time. If you take a break between chapters you need not try to remember a storyline when you get back to reading the book.

A good book for both sports enthusiasts and those who simply like to read of odd happenings.

[Tammy]

Parts of this book had me laughing so hard I was crying. I especially loved the chapters on the World Sauna Championship, the 3-mile golf hole, and the Rock Paper Scissors Championship (I so want to go to that one). The last chapter, on homeless soccer, isn't funny and isn't meant to be, but it does give a great alternative view on how to help others in a truly meaningful way.

The only complaint I have with this book is that the author referred to his then-girlfriend (now wife) as TLC (The Lovely Cynthia) throughout. I don't have a problem with this per se, I just wish he had given her an acronym that wasn't also a TV channel.

[Alpha · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5/5 - A hilarious read. I have to admit that my own sports (rock climbing and ultimate) are pretty stupid, so how could I not love other stupid sports? Highlights include having a chapter on baseball, which cracked me up, as well as another chapter on sports in New Zealand in general! This book doesn't pretend to be anything it's not, and does a great job hitting its target. In the end, I have to agree with the author - it's a pretty fantastic thing to see someone be passionate about something they love, even if it is pretty stupid to the rest of the world.

[David · Rating 4 out of 5]

What's not to envy about Rick Reilly? Long-time Sports Illustrated writer, ESPN analyst. Accompanied during the research for this book by a beautiful blonde "researcher", half his age, nicknamed "TLC" (she subsequently became his wife). He personifies "the life of Reilly".

The book? Oh, yes, the book. Funny as hell, even if you're not a Reilly fan. He covers some of the weirdest "sports" you've never heard of. It's laugh out loud material.

[Tlnorz · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is hilarious. Rick Reilly can do funny without being overly sarcastic and he can write about unusual people without mocking them. His book is chocked full of unusual people and Reilly tells their stories with all of their peculiarities but never in a mean-spirited way. This makes his stories all the more funny. You feel like you are laughing with people who put ferrets down their pants, not at them.