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Homeless: Growing Up Lesbian and Dyslexic in India
After discovering she’s lesbian and dyslexic at 20, Vaishali begins to untangle her anxieties around reading and writing. She comes out to her mother at 22 and leaves her Bombay home to make her own way. In a dingy, insect-ridden yet rent-free hostel room in Hyderabad with a door that doesn’t quite close, she tries to make the best of the situation by writing a book about her experiences. As she writes, she finds the past has a way of catching up with her, even as she explores her dyslexia, homosexuality, and the clitoris; falling in love and recovering from a harrowing breakup; academic failure, loneliness, and homophobia; living with sickness, anxiety, depression, and her caste, gender, and body. This is the story of Vaishali's relationship with her many truths and the truths of many young people in India.
157 pages, Kindle Edition
Published March 8, 2023
9 people are currently reading
211 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 45 reviews
May 19, 2023
An Indian queer memoir that also talks about mental health and disorders? Sign me up!
I'm very glad to have picked it up. I breezed through it and just couldn't put it down.
Vaishali takes us through her journey of what it was like growing up with symptoms of dyslexia and dysgraphia. She shows us how unkind Indian society is, how unaware we're to our kid's struggles. How toxic and dysfunctional families can be, while appearing to be "a normal perfect family" in the society. She discovers something about herself and while she knows her family might not accept it, she goes ahead and comes out to her family as a lesbian. As in most Indian families, it feels like the ends of times to her mother. And the struggles that Vaishali had faced growing up, only multiple when she finally has to move out.
And that's where the core of this book lies. She takes us through flashbacks of her life while navigating her ongoing battles.
To keep the review spoiler free, I'm going to end it here. The writing seemed effortless and so very accessible. I'm going to be on the lookout for the author's future works.
I think it's a very important book and we need to hear and encourage such diverse voices.
Highly Recommended!!
I'm very glad to have picked it up. I breezed through it and just couldn't put it down.
Vaishali takes us through her journey of what it was like growing up with symptoms of dyslexia and dysgraphia. She shows us how unkind Indian society is, how unaware we're to our kid's struggles. How toxic and dysfunctional families can be, while appearing to be "a normal perfect family" in the society. She discovers something about herself and while she knows her family might not accept it, she goes ahead and comes out to her family as a lesbian. As in most Indian families, it feels like the ends of times to her mother. And the struggles that Vaishali had faced growing up, only multiple when she finally has to move out.
And that's where the core of this book lies. She takes us through flashbacks of her life while navigating her ongoing battles.
To keep the review spoiler free, I'm going to end it here. The writing seemed effortless and so very accessible. I'm going to be on the lookout for the author's future works.
I think it's a very important book and we need to hear and encourage such diverse voices.
Highly Recommended!!
December 24, 2024
Homeless by K. Vaishali offers a raw and introspective account of her journey as a lesbian and dyslexic individual in Indian society. While I appreciate the author's courage and honesty in sharing her story, certain aspects left me wanting more. The frequent mention of her dyslexia and dysgraphia felt like excessive repetition, and I would have preferred a more balanced focus on significant aspects of her life and growth.
The book predominantly revolves around what she couldn't do and societal expectations, yet I empathize with her struggles. On a positive note, the candid discussion of anxiety resonated with me, and the vivid descriptions of hostel life in Hyderabad added depth to the narrative.
Overall, it offers thought-provoking insights into intersectional identities and the challenges faced by marginalized individuals in contemporary India.
Read the detailed review here - Books Chharming
The book predominantly revolves around what she couldn't do and societal expectations, yet I empathize with her struggles. On a positive note, the candid discussion of anxiety resonated with me, and the vivid descriptions of hostel life in Hyderabad added depth to the narrative.
Overall, it offers thought-provoking insights into intersectional identities and the challenges faced by marginalized individuals in contemporary India.
Read the detailed review here - Books Chharming
April 18, 2023
"Being different in a society that is not very open to different."
Right from the title, the book grabs you and shows you with its super accessible language the reality of being a lesbian in a country where being that is not okay. You are less than human if you are a lesbian.
Being an adult is complicated. Add to that growing up with a learning 'disorder' that shows up in different places in different ways in quotidian existence, like telling left from right. Add to that being lesbian in a country that is less accommodating to lesbians, and you have got yourself in a tough tough position.
What's the way out of it? Writing of course. And write she does. She's raw. She's real. She doesn't mince words. She pours it all into this book, and you will want to devour it all in one sitting.
You also get to learn (and unlearn) about her struggles with dyslexia and how complicated that monster is, how difficult it is to access the meager government facilities, and how inaccessible the society is to people with this 'disorder'. It's time we as a society make ourselves aware of this 'disorder' and its various forms and recognize it in our young and tweak their learning according to their needs.
With where the country is now, this book places itself in an important position and becomes essential reading about lgbtq+ people, and dyslexic people.
This memoir can and will pull on your heart strings.
Right from the title, the book grabs you and shows you with its super accessible language the reality of being a lesbian in a country where being that is not okay. You are less than human if you are a lesbian.
Being an adult is complicated. Add to that growing up with a learning 'disorder' that shows up in different places in different ways in quotidian existence, like telling left from right. Add to that being lesbian in a country that is less accommodating to lesbians, and you have got yourself in a tough tough position.
What's the way out of it? Writing of course. And write she does. She's raw. She's real. She doesn't mince words. She pours it all into this book, and you will want to devour it all in one sitting.
You also get to learn (and unlearn) about her struggles with dyslexia and how complicated that monster is, how difficult it is to access the meager government facilities, and how inaccessible the society is to people with this 'disorder'. It's time we as a society make ourselves aware of this 'disorder' and its various forms and recognize it in our young and tweak their learning according to their needs.
With where the country is now, this book places itself in an important position and becomes essential reading about lgbtq+ people, and dyslexic people.
This memoir can and will pull on your heart strings.
June 29, 2023
I think I've found my own Indian version of Holden Caulfield.
She comes in the form of an overweight, dyslexic, depressed and lonely lesbian living in Hyderabad.
The best Indian queer read of this year!
I won't shut up about this book for a long, long time to come.
Her rant on patriarchy, casteism, feminism, ableism, love, longing and the human condition is so spot on and relatable. Her sarcasm is taunt and funny.
I'll be stealing these quotes!
”Does cutting my hair short and having body hair make me masculine? Those are just choices."
"I’ve lived so long, I should matter to somebody, no?"
"I’d rather be sad in my room than be sad at a party."
She comes in the form of an overweight, dyslexic, depressed and lonely lesbian living in Hyderabad.
The best Indian queer read of this year!
I won't shut up about this book for a long, long time to come.
Her rant on patriarchy, casteism, feminism, ableism, love, longing and the human condition is so spot on and relatable. Her sarcasm is taunt and funny.
I'll be stealing these quotes!
”Does cutting my hair short and having body hair make me masculine? Those are just choices."
"I’ve lived so long, I should matter to somebody, no?"
"I’d rather be sad in my room than be sad at a party."
April 7, 2023
Homeless by K. Vaishali is a memoir of the author’s days spent introspecting in her own company as she is forced to leave her Mumbai home after coming out to her mother as lesbian; at first, in a co-rented flat in Ahmedabad and then in a UoH hostel, left to fend for herself devoid of the comforts, yet burdened with the ongoing challenges of dyslexia and dysgraphia. The memoir, for the major part, revolves around this major conflict—a type of parenting, the end goal of which is to prepare children for marriage and reproduction, or simply, to affirm that their children are as capable and qualified as children of other community members.
The problem with such type of parenting is the unacknowledged generational gap that leads to the normalisation of the imposition of parents’ beliefs, ideals, perceptions, and everything imaginable—that it’s okay to make your kids go through what they had gone through, that it’s maybe good for developing their kids’ mental strength, that whether it’s parental abuse or frequent fights between parents, there are going to be no repercussions. Ultimately, the children may suffer from clinical depression and lifelong mental disorders, like anxiety and OCD. If left unattended or found no conscious way to deal with it, the next generation is fated to receive what is popularly known as “generational trauma”— a deeply ingrained legacy of pain and suffering, including substance abuse, violent behaviour, and whatnot.
Before I digress further from the memoir, apart from the subject discussed above (one of the several issues that surface in the book), the author talks about being lonely, breakup, finding a partner, the fear of getting outed as having ‘homosexual tendencies’ in the times when homosexuality used be a criminal offense, casual homophobia, and daily struggles that come with many disorders she is trying to control and manage consciously. Overall, as the synopsis reads, living with disabilities that are not apparent from the outside, fighting against homophobia, and being a victim of inter-generational trauma are the truths of many young Indians, and we must listen to them.
Read the full review on my blog - https://bit.ly/3KOo0UF
The problem with such type of parenting is the unacknowledged generational gap that leads to the normalisation of the imposition of parents’ beliefs, ideals, perceptions, and everything imaginable—that it’s okay to make your kids go through what they had gone through, that it’s maybe good for developing their kids’ mental strength, that whether it’s parental abuse or frequent fights between parents, there are going to be no repercussions. Ultimately, the children may suffer from clinical depression and lifelong mental disorders, like anxiety and OCD. If left unattended or found no conscious way to deal with it, the next generation is fated to receive what is popularly known as “generational trauma”— a deeply ingrained legacy of pain and suffering, including substance abuse, violent behaviour, and whatnot.
Before I digress further from the memoir, apart from the subject discussed above (one of the several issues that surface in the book), the author talks about being lonely, breakup, finding a partner, the fear of getting outed as having ‘homosexual tendencies’ in the times when homosexuality used be a criminal offense, casual homophobia, and daily struggles that come with many disorders she is trying to control and manage consciously. Overall, as the synopsis reads, living with disabilities that are not apparent from the outside, fighting against homophobia, and being a victim of inter-generational trauma are the truths of many young Indians, and we must listen to them.
Read the full review on my blog - https://bit.ly/3KOo0UF
May 14, 2023
4.5*
A short read doesn't equal an easy read. With just over 200 pages, the days it took me to complete the book were longer than I anticipated.
The book is a short insight into the author's experiences. Her coming out as a Lesbian to her mother, her mother's rejection that followed, her struggle with dyslexia (reading disorder) and dysgraphia (writing disorder), her heartbreak and her trials to fit in a society that is not progressive enough to accept her sexuality.
More like a journal, the honesty and open writing is quite admirable.
I hope this book finds its way to the bookshelves of young readers. I hope that through such experiences of our fellow friends, and awareness, we let go of the existing beliefs that were imposed on us. I hope we could come closer towards accepting everyone as they are naturally, without effort.
.
.
.
PS: I loved the book cover. Vibrant and Colorful.
A short read doesn't equal an easy read. With just over 200 pages, the days it took me to complete the book were longer than I anticipated.
The book is a short insight into the author's experiences. Her coming out as a Lesbian to her mother, her mother's rejection that followed, her struggle with dyslexia (reading disorder) and dysgraphia (writing disorder), her heartbreak and her trials to fit in a society that is not progressive enough to accept her sexuality.
More like a journal, the honesty and open writing is quite admirable.
I hope this book finds its way to the bookshelves of young readers. I hope that through such experiences of our fellow friends, and awareness, we let go of the existing beliefs that were imposed on us. I hope we could come closer towards accepting everyone as they are naturally, without effort.
.
.
.
PS: I loved the book cover. Vibrant and Colorful.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 29, 2023
K. Vaishali pens , what by me is a raw and real memoir of her journey of a painful self discovery. The story deals with Vaishali s discovery of her sexuality and dyslexia and the overall animosity she had struggled with.
.
Moving out of her parents'jurisdiction, I should say her mom mostly, she tastes freedom but also has to deal with pangs of heart wrenching loneliness, self proclaimed autophile tendencies due to fear of judgement, panic attacks and a subdued hypochondriac nature.
.
I think parenting and upbringing in our country is a great feature here. The way most parents just want to produce a 'normal' kid, with marriageable and children producing capacities is damningly sad.
.
How Vaishali actually channelises all her experiences to find solace in writing and sticks to her determination to do something and own a house is really appreciatable.
.
Overall I think this book makes a strong mark in showcasing the reality a human has to face, bear with and live through being not only a lgtbq person but also having the 'Taare Zameen Par' disease, yes thats what dyslexia is nowadays and well, dysgraphia - who even knows of it.
The way love finds expression via Vaishali s words is very prominently touching too. With all her dysgraphia, I applaud her for bringing to front her emotions so well.
.
.
Moving out of her parents'jurisdiction, I should say her mom mostly, she tastes freedom but also has to deal with pangs of heart wrenching loneliness, self proclaimed autophile tendencies due to fear of judgement, panic attacks and a subdued hypochondriac nature.
.
I think parenting and upbringing in our country is a great feature here. The way most parents just want to produce a 'normal' kid, with marriageable and children producing capacities is damningly sad.
.
How Vaishali actually channelises all her experiences to find solace in writing and sticks to her determination to do something and own a house is really appreciatable.
.
Overall I think this book makes a strong mark in showcasing the reality a human has to face, bear with and live through being not only a lgtbq person but also having the 'Taare Zameen Par' disease, yes thats what dyslexia is nowadays and well, dysgraphia - who even knows of it.
The way love finds expression via Vaishali s words is very prominently touching too. With all her dysgraphia, I applaud her for bringing to front her emotions so well.
.
June 23, 2024
I don't quite know how to review this book....It is nice to read voices of Indian queer nuerodivergent individuals, and for that I am glad the book exists. I was excited about it and started it with an open mind. But I personally felt it was poorly written and edited and felt like a diary more than a memoir. And it was extremely tone deaf which just annoyed the hell out of me as a fellow neurodivergent lesbian growing up in India (adding a self deprecating caveat in the book about 'maybe I am being tone deaf' doesn't absolve you of it).
April 30, 2023
It was such a good book! Really emotional, engaging, and cathartic to read in a way that kicked my ass. Loved reading a queer memoir, definitely a fan of this author now!
Read
June 24, 2025k. vaishali has penned a memoir that attempts to capture the unique situational context of india, within which she places equal weight on her disability and sexuality: for the first half of her life she is unable to identify or verbalise her troubles associated with dyslexia and dysgraphia and suffers for it. later as she settles into her identity as a lesbian she is pushed further into a deepening spiral of loneliness.
the author doesn't make things sound poetic or rose-coloured, her prose is straightforward: here is how she suffered and here is how she got through this. there's a part where she explains her inability to read arundhati roy's the god of small things due to the intricacy of roy's prose; it hurt my heart but i could also see how it could be frustrating for a person with similar issues to her own. as wry-toned as the memoir was, i do respect her honesty in what and how she wrote. its straightforwardness communicated a diaristic genuineness which in this circumstance could be a more authentic medium of narrating personal events than a highly-polished memoir with dramatic prose that leads nowhere. class and caste are commented on, as the author is a (probably upper) middle-class brahmin woman, with some of her difficulties emerging partly due to the shelteredness her privilege accorded her for the years before she left her home as well.
i think a criticism that i had seen for this memoir often had to do with how she was 'whining' or complaining too often, which i would think is a highly insensitive comment to make. she clearly shows the struggles she has to go through and she has clearly underscored how writing about what she has been through could be cathartic for her. as a disabled person who had to prove her disability often, born into a highly troubled household and a country that deemed queer sex illegal till 2018, the struggles are constant and exhausting for her and it would make sense that she would want to elaborate on that and the profound effect it has on a lot of parts of her life rather than mention it in a throwaway line.
the memoir is only a slice of her life; a slice saturated with struggle, pain, opinions, comments, and thoughts, but a slice nevertheless. i do wish its scope could have encompassed a more substantial view of her journey and also gone on for longer before it slapdashed to her present situation.
the author doesn't make things sound poetic or rose-coloured, her prose is straightforward: here is how she suffered and here is how she got through this. there's a part where she explains her inability to read arundhati roy's the god of small things due to the intricacy of roy's prose; it hurt my heart but i could also see how it could be frustrating for a person with similar issues to her own. as wry-toned as the memoir was, i do respect her honesty in what and how she wrote. its straightforwardness communicated a diaristic genuineness which in this circumstance could be a more authentic medium of narrating personal events than a highly-polished memoir with dramatic prose that leads nowhere. class and caste are commented on, as the author is a (probably upper) middle-class brahmin woman, with some of her difficulties emerging partly due to the shelteredness her privilege accorded her for the years before she left her home as well.
i think a criticism that i had seen for this memoir often had to do with how she was 'whining' or complaining too often, which i would think is a highly insensitive comment to make. she clearly shows the struggles she has to go through and she has clearly underscored how writing about what she has been through could be cathartic for her. as a disabled person who had to prove her disability often, born into a highly troubled household and a country that deemed queer sex illegal till 2018, the struggles are constant and exhausting for her and it would make sense that she would want to elaborate on that and the profound effect it has on a lot of parts of her life rather than mention it in a throwaway line.
the memoir is only a slice of her life; a slice saturated with struggle, pain, opinions, comments, and thoughts, but a slice nevertheless. i do wish its scope could have encompassed a more substantial view of her journey and also gone on for longer before it slapdashed to her present situation.
July 17, 2023
This book takes you on the journey of a lesbian and a dyslexic person in India at the time when homosexuality was illegal.
The story revolves around how the author got to know about her sexuality and her disability and how she dealt with it.
Its a good read for someone who is interested in knowing more about people who lie in this section of society
The story revolves around how the author got to know about her sexuality and her disability and how she dealt with it.
Its a good read for someone who is interested in knowing more about people who lie in this section of society
June 5, 2024
Whiny, plot-less, boring pity party. I want to give it a zero but that’s not possible so I’ll give it a one.
July 8, 2023
BRILLIANT WRITING, PERIOD. I've already cried about this book on Twitter, won't repeat it here. Hands down THE BEST Pride Month Read ever.
June 17, 2024
“Growing Up Lesbian and Dyslexic in India” by K. Vaishali is my chosen read for Pride month. This memoir provides an unfiltered and authentic glimpse into the author's life, where she faces the dual challenges of dyslexia and discovering her sexuality in a conservative Indian society. Through this gritty first-hand account, Vaishali shares her personal experiences.
This is my first time reading an LGBT book set in India. Unfortunately, Indian society remains judgmental and conservative in accepting differences.
I was deeply impressed by the author's resilience and courage. Despite facing numerous challenges, such as academic struggles, societal homophobia, a dysfunctional family environment, and a failed romance, she remains determined.
While the topic and themes are intense, the writing style could have been improved. The lack of organization, repetitions, and pacing detract from the overall flow and rhythm. The disjointed narrative disrupts the reading experience.
As with memoirs, the narrative is based on the author's personal experiences and does not provide a detailed exploration of the experiences of others in similar situations. Consequently, it suffers from personal bias and offers a limited perspective. Additionally, there are generalizations about larger groups or communities without proper justification.
Despite these flaws, the memoir remains a vital contribution to the literature on marginalized identities and is a must-read for those seeking to understand the nuanced challenges of living with multiple intersecting marginalized identities in contemporary India. Reading about the author's experiences will sensitize readers and deepen their understanding of these issues.
“Homeless: Growing Up Lesbian and Dyslexic in India” is a powerful memoir that combines personal storytelling with social critique. Its honesty and educational value are significant strengths, although the intense focus on struggles and issues with the narrative structure may lessen its overall impact.
_________________________________________________
Connect with me on Twitter | Instagram | Blog and let’s talk BOOKS!!
This is my first time reading an LGBT book set in India. Unfortunately, Indian society remains judgmental and conservative in accepting differences.
I was deeply impressed by the author's resilience and courage. Despite facing numerous challenges, such as academic struggles, societal homophobia, a dysfunctional family environment, and a failed romance, she remains determined.
While the topic and themes are intense, the writing style could have been improved. The lack of organization, repetitions, and pacing detract from the overall flow and rhythm. The disjointed narrative disrupts the reading experience.
As with memoirs, the narrative is based on the author's personal experiences and does not provide a detailed exploration of the experiences of others in similar situations. Consequently, it suffers from personal bias and offers a limited perspective. Additionally, there are generalizations about larger groups or communities without proper justification.
Despite these flaws, the memoir remains a vital contribution to the literature on marginalized identities and is a must-read for those seeking to understand the nuanced challenges of living with multiple intersecting marginalized identities in contemporary India. Reading about the author's experiences will sensitize readers and deepen their understanding of these issues.
“Homeless: Growing Up Lesbian and Dyslexic in India” is a powerful memoir that combines personal storytelling with social critique. Its honesty and educational value are significant strengths, although the intense focus on struggles and issues with the narrative structure may lessen its overall impact.
_________________________________________________
Connect with me on Twitter | Instagram | Blog and let’s talk BOOKS!!
April 26, 2023
Homeless by K Vaishali was such an easy read, despite talking about such intense situations. The Author writes with such honesty and vulnerability that it almost felt like I could see it all happen in the moment. They describe both the situations around them and their thought process while they are trying to get through them without making it confusing.
I loved how the author managed to stay mindful of the words used to describe dyslexia and dysgraphia, the way they say "My brand of Dyslexia" to not exactly define the condition was brilliant. Most people assume that there are specific "symptoms" or definitions that are absolute, this generally furthers the idea that someone would need to go through a check list to be able to understand themselves and their issues. Reading the words "My brand of Dyslexia" was incredibly validating.
The book made me think about the way we treat people who Invisible disabilities, Most outright refuse to acknowledge the existence of such disabilities, let alone think about accessibility. The authors struggles with dysgraphia stuck a cord with me.
The definition of Dyslexia given in the book most accurately describes it. It has given me a new perspective on the way I understand the condition.
The fear and suffocation felt by someone who needs to survive in a place where their "homosexual tendencies" was a crime until recently, all while maneuvering through adulthood, heartbreak and loneliness without external support was both harrowing and Inspiring. Their self-awareness about the privilege they held in certain situations was refreshing to read.
The conversation about family structures, need for societal validation (or not), Parents internalising their childrens issues and seeing them as personal failures instead of helping the children through them, expectations from children and how transactional parent -child relationships can be, The kind of dual lives most children lead as to not offend or hurt their parents and society is thought provoking and heart breaking.
The book is the most accurate reflection of the society and how people who do not fit into the "standardized boxes of acceptable" are forced to live.
I loved how the author managed to stay mindful of the words used to describe dyslexia and dysgraphia, the way they say "My brand of Dyslexia" to not exactly define the condition was brilliant. Most people assume that there are specific "symptoms" or definitions that are absolute, this generally furthers the idea that someone would need to go through a check list to be able to understand themselves and their issues. Reading the words "My brand of Dyslexia" was incredibly validating.
The book made me think about the way we treat people who Invisible disabilities, Most outright refuse to acknowledge the existence of such disabilities, let alone think about accessibility. The authors struggles with dysgraphia stuck a cord with me.
The definition of Dyslexia given in the book most accurately describes it. It has given me a new perspective on the way I understand the condition.
The fear and suffocation felt by someone who needs to survive in a place where their "homosexual tendencies" was a crime until recently, all while maneuvering through adulthood, heartbreak and loneliness without external support was both harrowing and Inspiring. Their self-awareness about the privilege they held in certain situations was refreshing to read.
The conversation about family structures, need for societal validation (or not), Parents internalising their childrens issues and seeing them as personal failures instead of helping the children through them, expectations from children and how transactional parent -child relationships can be, The kind of dual lives most children lead as to not offend or hurt their parents and society is thought provoking and heart breaking.
The book is the most accurate reflection of the society and how people who do not fit into the "standardized boxes of acceptable" are forced to live.
January 14, 2025
A beautiful memoir on being queer & dyslexic in India. Her meditations on the economy, caste, patriarchy, generational trauma & heteronormativity are razor sharp and honest.
The constant exhaustion and fear with which queer & disabled people have to survive in ableist spaces was so clearly translated as an all consuming experience in this book. I wish people in positions of institutional power read this book end to end twice at least to understand how damaging many institutions in our society are and truly any re-envisioning of our world must begin with taking experience like the author's into account.
Her story leaves me with the reminder to keep practicing dismantling/ decentering ableist & casteist notions permeating our daily lives & pushing for systemic changes while creating structures that are rooted in love & empathy.
The constant exhaustion and fear with which queer & disabled people have to survive in ableist spaces was so clearly translated as an all consuming experience in this book. I wish people in positions of institutional power read this book end to end twice at least to understand how damaging many institutions in our society are and truly any re-envisioning of our world must begin with taking experience like the author's into account.
Her story leaves me with the reminder to keep practicing dismantling/ decentering ableist & casteist notions permeating our daily lives & pushing for systemic changes while creating structures that are rooted in love & empathy.
July 14, 2023
Very engaging and unputdownable.
The author has a way of describing the mundane details of our lives in depth and goes into tremendous detail on accessibility of the world for people with dyslexia & dygraphia.
The book has been heavily marketed for being raw. More than being raw, I see it's positioning: it talks about disability and substandard living conditions to a demographic that would not automatically reach out for a book on someone suffering in India. It is positioned to reach a younger, more sheltered audience on the realities of life outside the comforts of our parents' homes. This will always be an accomplishment for this book.
Please check your trigger warnings before reading the book.
The author has a way of describing the mundane details of our lives in depth and goes into tremendous detail on accessibility of the world for people with dyslexia & dygraphia.
The book has been heavily marketed for being raw. More than being raw, I see it's positioning: it talks about disability and substandard living conditions to a demographic that would not automatically reach out for a book on someone suffering in India. It is positioned to reach a younger, more sheltered audience on the realities of life outside the comforts of our parents' homes. This will always be an accomplishment for this book.
Please check your trigger warnings before reading the book.
June 12, 2024
A very well-written intersectional memoir about being queer and disabled in India. A lot of the author's experiences are so relatable (as a fellow HCU alumnus, the descriptions of the HCU hostel brought me flashbacks; and the depiction of struggles with mental illness hit close to the heart for me) and everything has been written with such care. And the story also opened my mind up to a lot of new perspectives I hadn't thought about before.
Reading this book felt like so much like talking to a friend. We need more such books in the world.
Reading this book felt like so much like talking to a friend. We need more such books in the world.
September 17, 2024
This is K. Vaishali’s memoir about growing up lesbian and dyslexic in India in which she points out the different ways in which so many Indians discriminate against people who are different from societal standards in the smallest ways and how that discrimination grows into hate when the person in question is a lesbian.
The book is eye-opening as Vaishali narrates her life and how she was treated by her own family. The whole situation in her family wasn’t that great to begin with, given the many expectations on her shoulder. But when she told them she was lesbian and dyslexic, their reaction was beyond any she had imagined.
Beyond that, she takes us through how being kicked out onto the street has affected her, her career, her love life, her friendships, and her desires. It is a clinically written book but you can see the hurt emerging from its pages.
Please read it, spread the word, and try not to be like the people who made Vaishali feel this way.
The book is eye-opening as Vaishali narrates her life and how she was treated by her own family. The whole situation in her family wasn’t that great to begin with, given the many expectations on her shoulder. But when she told them she was lesbian and dyslexic, their reaction was beyond any she had imagined.
Beyond that, she takes us through how being kicked out onto the street has affected her, her career, her love life, her friendships, and her desires. It is a clinically written book but you can see the hurt emerging from its pages.
Please read it, spread the word, and try not to be like the people who made Vaishali feel this way.
February 6, 2026
so glad my constant search for lesbian Indian writing brought me here! breezed through, with gorgeous detail in places. Love how she admits not being able to fully explain or articulate her thoughts but still invites us into snippets of them. The book also got me thinking about Brahmanical purity codes and the entanglement of sex, fetish and food!
July 7, 2023
This book covers a vast range of topics including homophobia, sexism,patriarchy, the Indian caste system,body shaming,isolation, depression,anxiety,loneliness and of course being queer and dyslexic. This is most definitely one of the best queer books ever. A must read for everyone.
August 17, 2024
This memoir is both raw and extremely skillfully written, with a caustic humour I very much appreciated, but then I love gallows humour. It's a pity we have so few queer books in India, and I hope to read many more by this author.
I don't love the title though.
I don't love the title though.
May 27, 2025
Honest and Heart-Wrenching From the first page, you can feel the weight of experience.
The writing is full of honesty, even when it hurts.
There's healing between the lines, even in the pain.
This book is both a wound and a balm.
The writing is full of honesty, even when it hurts.
There's healing between the lines, even in the pain.
This book is both a wound and a balm.
June 5, 2025
This isn’t a straightforward journey; it’s layered and messy.
And that’s exactly what makes it feel so real.
The writing respects complexity without ever losing clarity.
It’s emotional, thoughtful, and incredibly honest.
And that’s exactly what makes it feel so real.
The writing respects complexity without ever losing clarity.
It’s emotional, thoughtful, and incredibly honest.
June 10, 2025
Deep and Resonant
It’s not just a storyit’s a voice echoing what many feel.
The emotions are not dressed up; they’re laid bare.
The writing feels personal, like a secret being shared.
A deeply resonant read for thoughtful hearts.
It’s not just a storyit’s a voice echoing what many feel.
The emotions are not dressed up; they’re laid bare.
The writing feels personal, like a secret being shared.
A deeply resonant read for thoughtful hearts.
June 11, 2025
The story doesn’t ask for your approval it simply exists.
It holds up a mirror to all the quiet battles we hide.
There’s something freeing about its raw openness.
It doesn’t try to fix everything and that’s okay.
Some stories are meant to just be heard.
June 11, 2025
Fearless and Raw
This book dives straight into the uncomfortable without flinching.
The writing doesn’t ask for pityit demands to be heard.
Each page carries the weight of truth and self-reflection.
It’s more than a memoirit’s a statement.
You’ll walk away feeling changed.
This book dives straight into the uncomfortable without flinching.
The writing doesn’t ask for pityit demands to be heard.
Each page carries the weight of truth and self-reflection.
It’s more than a memoirit’s a statement.
You’ll walk away feeling changed.
June 11, 2025
Quiet and Intimate
Reading this felt like listening to a close friend share secrets.
The tone is gentle but never dull, personal yet universal.
It paints pain without dramatizing it.
There’s healing in the honesty.
It’s the kind of story that stays with you quietly.
Reading this felt like listening to a close friend share secrets.
The tone is gentle but never dull, personal yet universal.
It paints pain without dramatizing it.
There’s healing in the honesty.
It’s the kind of story that stays with you quietly.
June 11, 2025
Straightforward and Striking
No fluff, no distractionsjust experience laid bare.
The author writes with clarity and purpose.
Even the smallest details are full of meaning.
It’s deeply personal but also deeply relatable.
This book speaks to anyone finding their way.
No fluff, no distractionsjust experience laid bare.
The author writes with clarity and purpose.
Even the smallest details are full of meaning.
It’s deeply personal but also deeply relatable.
This book speaks to anyone finding their way.
June 11, 2025
Honest and Layered
This isn’t just about identityit’s about survival.
Every emotion is layered, every memory told with care.
The voice feels real, never polished for effect.
There’s beauty in its messiness.
It tells the truth even when it hurts.
This isn’t just about identityit’s about survival.
Every emotion is layered, every memory told with care.
The voice feels real, never polished for effect.
There’s beauty in its messiness.
It tells the truth even when it hurts.
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