What do you think?
Rate this book
The Cooper Family Saga #1
Too Jewish
ASINB004FGMT4U transferred to more recent edition.
When young, brainy Bernie Cooper escapes the Nazis and ends up in New Orleans, he thinks at first that he’s landed softly, almost immediately finding love with Letty, not only a nice Jewish girl, but fifth-generation Southern upper crust. But suddenly, snobberies he couldn’t even have guessed at are set in motion. It seems Letty’s prominent Jewish parents hate him for being…too Jewish!
At first this strikes him only as petty and small-minded, but he has no idea how much hatred his scheming mother-in-law can wring from the situation. She knows, for instance, that he had to leave behind his beloved mother, and she uses his mother’s life and memory as a lever against him, eventually causing him physical and mental problems that threaten his family’s well-being in every possible way and thwart him at every turn.
Thus, Bernie and Letty’s daughter Darby is born into the strangest of mixed marriages, torn, as her mother is, between loyalty to her grandparents and to her father. Even she, at her tender age, wonders whether Letty’s love—and her own–can save Bernie from the secret pain and guilt of surviving the Holocaust. And from the machinations of his cruel mother-in-law.
This bittersweet love story is told in three novellas, each from the point of view of one member of the Cooper family. From Bernie we learn the immigrant’s story, of a young Jew making it out of Germany just as Hitler invades Poland and Europe shuts down. Speaking little English, he makes his way across America, and he finds Letty in New Orleans. In the second novella, Letty picks up where Bernie leaves off, and we see this is no ordinary rich girl, but rather an unspoiled, curious, generous-spirited young woman who sees Bernie for who he is and falls in love despite all the obstacles thrown up by her parents. When Darby picks up the story in the third novella, everything is in place for a comfortable ending–or a tragedy Darby bears the legacy of her father’s deep sadness and her mother’s need to fit into New Orleans’s peculiar social structure.
When young, brainy Bernie Cooper escapes the Nazis and ends up in New Orleans, he thinks at first that he’s landed softly, almost immediately finding love with Letty, not only a nice Jewish girl, but fifth-generation Southern upper crust. But suddenly, snobberies he couldn’t even have guessed at are set in motion. It seems Letty’s prominent Jewish parents hate him for being…too Jewish!
At first this strikes him only as petty and small-minded, but he has no idea how much hatred his scheming mother-in-law can wring from the situation. She knows, for instance, that he had to leave behind his beloved mother, and she uses his mother’s life and memory as a lever against him, eventually causing him physical and mental problems that threaten his family’s well-being in every possible way and thwart him at every turn.
Thus, Bernie and Letty’s daughter Darby is born into the strangest of mixed marriages, torn, as her mother is, between loyalty to her grandparents and to her father. Even she, at her tender age, wonders whether Letty’s love—and her own–can save Bernie from the secret pain and guilt of surviving the Holocaust. And from the machinations of his cruel mother-in-law.
This bittersweet love story is told in three novellas, each from the point of view of one member of the Cooper family. From Bernie we learn the immigrant’s story, of a young Jew making it out of Germany just as Hitler invades Poland and Europe shuts down. Speaking little English, he makes his way across America, and he finds Letty in New Orleans. In the second novella, Letty picks up where Bernie leaves off, and we see this is no ordinary rich girl, but rather an unspoiled, curious, generous-spirited young woman who sees Bernie for who he is and falls in love despite all the obstacles thrown up by her parents. When Darby picks up the story in the third novella, everything is in place for a comfortable ending–or a tragedy Darby bears the legacy of her father’s deep sadness and her mother’s need to fit into New Orleans’s peculiar social structure.
234 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 1, 2010
159 people are currently reading
822 people want to read
About the author
Patty Friedmann
35 books36 followersPatty Friedmann is a darkly comic New Orleans novelist whose dozen works include the Amazon perennial bestseller Too Jewish and the celebrated Secondhand Smoke. Her essays, short stories, and reviews have appeared in Newsweek, Publishers Weekly, New Orleans Noir, Short Story, and Oxford American, among other places. A novel titled An Organized Panic and a collection of her stories titled Where Do They All Come From are 2017 releases. Patty has had two husbands, two children, and three grandchildren, and currently lives with an annoying philodendron.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 116 reviews
August 3, 2013
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11OzH...
I literally just finished this book. Will return to review.
Returned now to write a short review.
There are books that have bumps and some dragging for short periods, and that have glorious writing, This is one of those books. This is also a book that I think is a rare find. The author's character development, the narrators' voices and how they used them, and the flow of language, all drew me in from page one. I was totally invested in the lives lost, lives present, and lives future of everyone I met here. I really did feel like I met and got to know them. The characters became real people to me. They weren't the caricatures of other authors who've chosen to write about similar issues and experiences, but couldn't breathe life into their characters no matter how they tried.
I found myself carried along by gentle and crashing waves that caught me up and kept me riding swells and lulls. There was no way that I was going to CHOOSE to get off these cresting and ebbing tides. The emotions I felt challenged me, ate me up inside, and also had me laughing and nodding my head at times - because I understood and because I FELT. And oh how I FELT!
My mind, body, and heart were challenged by the ideas, issues, and realities that the characters really did live through - this was not a historical novel. This was the real deal - Life as lived and died by millions. I didn't think about the big picture and those millions though while reading "Too Jewish", because nothing and no one existed for me while I was reading. I'm still thinking about and processing so much. I believe I will be for a long time to come. It was more than difficult for me to say goodbye to everyone and everything at the end of this book. I wished I could have told the characters how much they will always mean to me. I hope I will somehow be able to let Patty Friedmann know the same.
So, give me some lumps and bumps any time for a reading experience like this one, anytime.
I literally just finished this book. Will return to review.
Returned now to write a short review.
There are books that have bumps and some dragging for short periods, and that have glorious writing, This is one of those books. This is also a book that I think is a rare find. The author's character development, the narrators' voices and how they used them, and the flow of language, all drew me in from page one. I was totally invested in the lives lost, lives present, and lives future of everyone I met here. I really did feel like I met and got to know them. The characters became real people to me. They weren't the caricatures of other authors who've chosen to write about similar issues and experiences, but couldn't breathe life into their characters no matter how they tried.
I found myself carried along by gentle and crashing waves that caught me up and kept me riding swells and lulls. There was no way that I was going to CHOOSE to get off these cresting and ebbing tides. The emotions I felt challenged me, ate me up inside, and also had me laughing and nodding my head at times - because I understood and because I FELT. And oh how I FELT!
My mind, body, and heart were challenged by the ideas, issues, and realities that the characters really did live through - this was not a historical novel. This was the real deal - Life as lived and died by millions. I didn't think about the big picture and those millions though while reading "Too Jewish", because nothing and no one existed for me while I was reading. I'm still thinking about and processing so much. I believe I will be for a long time to come. It was more than difficult for me to say goodbye to everyone and everything at the end of this book. I wished I could have told the characters how much they will always mean to me. I hope I will somehow be able to let Patty Friedmann know the same.
So, give me some lumps and bumps any time for a reading experience like this one, anytime.
April 12, 2012
This book was written in three parts and from the viewpoints of the three main characters, Bernie, his wife Letty and their daughter Darby. It is based in New Orleans not in Europe and it tells of the struggles of holocaust escaper Bernie in dealing with his complex emotions having left family behind in Germany. Also there are issues surrounding his orthodoxy versus his wife's liberal Jewish family upbringing. Seeing the story unfold with the three characters is very compelling and one gets to understand the different viewpoints which are expressed very well. It also manages to convey how individual and family pressures can affect one's life for both good and bad.
November 19, 2014
I had to think about this book a little bit before I wrote a review. While Bernie's story about getting out of Germany and leaving his Mother behind and then the survivor's guilt that he then had to live with really moved me, the rest of the story just left me cold.
It's not a great book and the writing isn't all that good and there were so many grammatical errors that I found them distracting. Didn't someone (with a college degree) edit this book before it was published?
As a Jew I feel a little guilty giving this book three stars and a tepid review but honestly there are just so many better books about the Holocaust and survivors out there that this one just isn't necessary.
It's not a great book and the writing isn't all that good and there were so many grammatical errors that I found them distracting. Didn't someone (with a college degree) edit this book before it was published?
As a Jew I feel a little guilty giving this book three stars and a tepid review but honestly there are just so many better books about the Holocaust and survivors out there that this one just isn't necessary.
April 25, 2012
This wasn't a good book. The characters are either villains or victims, and the reason the victims choose to behave as such is left totally unclear. Why the family whose viewpoint the story is told from didn't just leave town, refuse to take money, and cut the toxic people out of their lives is never fully explained. The villain's motivation is never explained either - these people are simply irredeemably awful to everyone around them. The book had a petulant and yet deeply sad tone to me, as if written by someone struggling to create a narrative to explain the inexplicable, and the swathe of trauma the holocaust left in its wake. Unfortunately, by creating a couple of snobbish new orleans reform Jews as cartoon villains, it fails miserably to explore the complexity of human survival and emotional life. I had hoped the book would explore the religious tensions between new immigrants and older settled Jewish communities, but there was almost no discussion of this in the book at all.
February 10, 2014
A Must Read
Through my life I have met and known people like the characters in this book. Age and maturity determined how I have felt or judged these individuals. I am always amazed at how prejudiced Jews can be about other Jews or family members.
This book tells a wonderful but sad story about the effects on the life of one family living through the time of the holocaust and it's affect on their entire lives. Personally I want everyone reminded of that horrific time because too many try to make it out as a farce or that the Jews deserved this treatment. We must not forget if we want any group of people from being treated in this manner.
I admire the Patty Friedmann's ability to write such a powerful story. I hope the process ended as a positive experience.
Through my life I have met and known people like the characters in this book. Age and maturity determined how I have felt or judged these individuals. I am always amazed at how prejudiced Jews can be about other Jews or family members.
This book tells a wonderful but sad story about the effects on the life of one family living through the time of the holocaust and it's affect on their entire lives. Personally I want everyone reminded of that horrific time because too many try to make it out as a farce or that the Jews deserved this treatment. We must not forget if we want any group of people from being treated in this manner.
I admire the Patty Friedmann's ability to write such a powerful story. I hope the process ended as a positive experience.
March 2, 2014
Sad, frustrating story about the costs of guilt (imagined or real).
Very well written short generational story about the Holocaust, the families left behind, and the ones to come.
The author's easy flowing style (and just enough humor to keep the book real)kept this story moving through three narrations: Bernie (the father), Letty (the mother), and Darby ( their daughter) and how all three are affected by one act of prejudice and closed-minded snobbery.
There are enough typos and punctuation errors to catch the eye and I hope the author finds the time to make those corrections.
But they really don't detract from the fast-moving story, with its shocking conclusion.
Very well written short generational story about the Holocaust, the families left behind, and the ones to come.
The author's easy flowing style (and just enough humor to keep the book real)kept this story moving through three narrations: Bernie (the father), Letty (the mother), and Darby ( their daughter) and how all three are affected by one act of prejudice and closed-minded snobbery.
There are enough typos and punctuation errors to catch the eye and I hope the author finds the time to make those corrections.
But they really don't detract from the fast-moving story, with its shocking conclusion.
May 2, 2014
As someone who has always had a fascination with Holocaust survival stories, I was interested in this work of fiction told from 3 members of a Jewish family living in America who face discrimination from fellow Jews based on class. It's the idea of wanting to assimilate to a wealthy American lifestyle and the struggle of shedding their own ethnic identity in the process. It's a story of a couple and their daughter coming from different class upbringings fighting against the crazy wealthy mother-in-law who will stop at nothing to ruin her son-in-laws life because she thinks he's "too Jewish". A moving novel that is worth reading.
May 6, 2018
Bernie is the German Jew who escaped Nazi Germany before the war. He wants to be an observant Jew, but when he meets and marries Letty his Jewish observance is eroded. For her snobbish mother he is too Jewish. She sees herself as being above the label of being Jewish, yet all her connections are Jewish. Arguably her prosperity depends on her Jewish roots. For Letty’s mother money buys everything; the tuition at her granddaughter’s school, Rena the maid and later the judiciary in a hit and run accident.
Bernie starts his oral history by saying his favourite programme is the $64,000 question. This may be connected to his desire to provide a sustainable income for his family, through his business. Money is a constant theme throughout the book, because Letty’s parents are wealthy and use this as a powerful weapon against their own son-in-law. This obviously makes Bernie feel uncomfortable and is one of the reasons why he wants to move to New York, to be closer to his business partner. Lack of money was also an issue when he was trying to free his mother from Nazi Germany. The fact that he was too late, will forever weigh on his conscience. It also may be one reason why he asks that his oral history be kept secret until 50 years have passed.
Where Bernie sees bumping into Letty on Ellice Island as a coincidence, she sees it almost as fate. For Letty this is another example of her mother’s snobbery. The fact that bumping into someone was their fault and as such they should pick up her spilled luggage. Later she denies having met Bernie, as they would have been travelling first class.
Letty states in her oral history the she does not like to travel, which is partly the reason why she won’t leave New Orleans and that she does not care what people think. This is only partly true, as she does care a great deal about what her mother thinks. It is because she wants her mother’s approval, love and respect that she will not move away, despite Bernie’s pleas. Yet she can never get away from her mother’s money and influence. She wants the best for her daughter, so agrees to her mother paying the fees, but later she applies and qualifies for a scholarship. If she was less caring and more independent minded, she may have done this sooner, before the threat of non-payment of fees.
Derby is Bernie and Letty’s daughter. Her most important characteristic is that she can speak and read German. This allows her to speak to her father’s German friends and enables her to read her paternal grandmother’s letters, written to her father from Germany. It is her friends prejudice against the Germans, and the Nazi’s in particular, which bring out the tragedy and new beginnings at the end of the book. Darby, perhaps more than her mother, personifies an unfettered attitude when it comes to what people think. She is very much the clever outsider. It is only when her best friend Catherine leaves for boarding school and she is forced to fit in with the other girls that things go drastically wrong.
The most prominent and obnoxious character is Letty’s mother. Dominating the book completely, she rules and manipulates everyone’s lives through money and influence. In the end, you also feel her husband has to tow the party line. For her, being Jewish is a second-class citizen not a badge of honour and being an orthodox Jew or an observant Jew is even worse. Snobbish to the point of vulgarity she is petty and mean. Letty refers to her as delighting in making other people’s lives miserable. For her it is a source of power and status. She cares what people will think of Letty, as it is a bad reflection on her. When she takes Darby to Europe it is to show her the advantages of money and what she can do for her that her father can’t. No one knows that Darby and her father have their own bond through their knowledge of the German language. Indeed Bernie requests her grandmother does not take his daughter to Germany due to the painful memories. In the itinerary she marks Germany as Austria and takes Darby to Bergan-Belson where her paternal grandmother was held and where she learns of her ultimate fate. Such is her cruelty when Darby gets upset and does not want to know, she goes through the records herself.
The novel is separated into 3 perspectives; father, mother and child. Each give their own side of the proceedings with the hateful grandmother being the central link. I do wonder if the story is overshadowed by the grandmother’s presence, diminishing the others roles and somewhat flattening their characters.
The ending is fitting to what is essentially a very challenging situation. A lesson in how far we let money and other people dominate our lives.
Bernie starts his oral history by saying his favourite programme is the $64,000 question. This may be connected to his desire to provide a sustainable income for his family, through his business. Money is a constant theme throughout the book, because Letty’s parents are wealthy and use this as a powerful weapon against their own son-in-law. This obviously makes Bernie feel uncomfortable and is one of the reasons why he wants to move to New York, to be closer to his business partner. Lack of money was also an issue when he was trying to free his mother from Nazi Germany. The fact that he was too late, will forever weigh on his conscience. It also may be one reason why he asks that his oral history be kept secret until 50 years have passed.
Where Bernie sees bumping into Letty on Ellice Island as a coincidence, she sees it almost as fate. For Letty this is another example of her mother’s snobbery. The fact that bumping into someone was their fault and as such they should pick up her spilled luggage. Later she denies having met Bernie, as they would have been travelling first class.
Letty states in her oral history the she does not like to travel, which is partly the reason why she won’t leave New Orleans and that she does not care what people think. This is only partly true, as she does care a great deal about what her mother thinks. It is because she wants her mother’s approval, love and respect that she will not move away, despite Bernie’s pleas. Yet she can never get away from her mother’s money and influence. She wants the best for her daughter, so agrees to her mother paying the fees, but later she applies and qualifies for a scholarship. If she was less caring and more independent minded, she may have done this sooner, before the threat of non-payment of fees.
Derby is Bernie and Letty’s daughter. Her most important characteristic is that she can speak and read German. This allows her to speak to her father’s German friends and enables her to read her paternal grandmother’s letters, written to her father from Germany. It is her friends prejudice against the Germans, and the Nazi’s in particular, which bring out the tragedy and new beginnings at the end of the book. Darby, perhaps more than her mother, personifies an unfettered attitude when it comes to what people think. She is very much the clever outsider. It is only when her best friend Catherine leaves for boarding school and she is forced to fit in with the other girls that things go drastically wrong.
The most prominent and obnoxious character is Letty’s mother. Dominating the book completely, she rules and manipulates everyone’s lives through money and influence. In the end, you also feel her husband has to tow the party line. For her, being Jewish is a second-class citizen not a badge of honour and being an orthodox Jew or an observant Jew is even worse. Snobbish to the point of vulgarity she is petty and mean. Letty refers to her as delighting in making other people’s lives miserable. For her it is a source of power and status. She cares what people will think of Letty, as it is a bad reflection on her. When she takes Darby to Europe it is to show her the advantages of money and what she can do for her that her father can’t. No one knows that Darby and her father have their own bond through their knowledge of the German language. Indeed Bernie requests her grandmother does not take his daughter to Germany due to the painful memories. In the itinerary she marks Germany as Austria and takes Darby to Bergan-Belson where her paternal grandmother was held and where she learns of her ultimate fate. Such is her cruelty when Darby gets upset and does not want to know, she goes through the records herself.
The novel is separated into 3 perspectives; father, mother and child. Each give their own side of the proceedings with the hateful grandmother being the central link. I do wonder if the story is overshadowed by the grandmother’s presence, diminishing the others roles and somewhat flattening their characters.
The ending is fitting to what is essentially a very challenging situation. A lesson in how far we let money and other people dominate our lives.
February 10, 2020
This is a departure from the usual crime books I read and what a pleasant departure it turned out to be. Friedman uses words beautifully to draw the reader in and play their emotions through every part of the scale. The story is seen from the perspective of three characters. - Bernie, His wife Letty and their daughter. Darby. This works well and the three stories dovetail beautifully. An interesting perspective of post war New Orleans and of the melding of Jewish cultures.
July 1, 2011
This was such a wonderful story that draws on the events of WWII for one young man and blends it with his new life in New Orleans. We follow Bernie's emotional journey after he narrowly escapes Nazi Germany for a better life, only to leave his mother behind to a destiny he could hardly fathom. We see how the Holocaust effects Bernie and those that will become his support system in the United States.
Friedmann did a great job of breaking this story up into different sections of family members but still sharing the emotions of all that are involved. As the story opens we see what life was like for Bernie in Nazi Germany as he struggles with the decision to leave the only place he has known as a home. His mother is set in her ways and instructs Bernie to leave if that is what he desires, but she will stay behind because this phase of the war would certainly pass quickly. She was confident that things would return to normal before too long. When Bernie arrives in the United States he meets a friend living in New York and they embark on a business venture together. Since it is a new business and Bernie needs to find a way to make money he decides to join the armed services. He figures that he will eventually be able to help his mother by joining the Army.
The Army is what leads Bernie to New Orleans and to Letty. Bernie seemed to me to be a pretty Orthodox Jew as he recited Hebrew in the Temple, tried to follow a kosher diet (not always easy in the army), and always followed the rituals of the Sabbath Day. Meeting Letty and some other Jewish folks in New Orleans was quite a rude awakening as to how these people were living. I mean what Jewish mother in her right mind would serve pork for dinner?
Letty is a sweet girl that seems to be fully controlled by her parents. Bernie definitely throws off the entire plan that they have for her by winning her heart. As Bernie gives Letty a desire to live her life for herself rather than depending upon them for every need. When Bernie and Letty decide to start a life together they decide to stay in New Orleans, which happens to keep them under her parents umbrella. This is very frustrating for the young family as Letty's parents seem to find ways to keep them dependent on the finances they have available.
Letty's parents do not seem to realize how deeply the Holocaust has effected Bernie. As their lives go, on all Letty can do is watch his health decline as he inwardly punishes himself for not being able to do more for his loved ones that he left in Germany. She is in a continuous battle with her parents to try to prove that Bernie is a good man that will take care of their needs sufficiently.
When Letty gives birth to Darby that just seems to be the final anchor that her parents need to be able to control their lives. We see Darby's own struggles as her father tries to instill his Jewish traditions within her while Letty's parents are just trying to forget all of the rituals that go with their religion. They do have a very special father/daughter relationship as Bernie seems to be able to relate to Darby in such an honest way.
This was such a sad story as we watch what is like for Bernie to adapt to life in the United States while knowing what is happening to his loved ones in Germany. It would have been nice if his new in-laws understood Bernie's pain and accepted him lovingly into their family. This made for a tremendous amount of familial controversy, which was really hard for me to comprehend how people can be so selfish. With themes of the Holocaust, family, honor, and traditions, I found this to be an enjoyable but yet heart-wrenching book. I believe that this book was written for the enjoyment of the Young Adult audience, but really any age group can learn from these pages.
Friedmann did a great job of breaking this story up into different sections of family members but still sharing the emotions of all that are involved. As the story opens we see what life was like for Bernie in Nazi Germany as he struggles with the decision to leave the only place he has known as a home. His mother is set in her ways and instructs Bernie to leave if that is what he desires, but she will stay behind because this phase of the war would certainly pass quickly. She was confident that things would return to normal before too long. When Bernie arrives in the United States he meets a friend living in New York and they embark on a business venture together. Since it is a new business and Bernie needs to find a way to make money he decides to join the armed services. He figures that he will eventually be able to help his mother by joining the Army.
The Army is what leads Bernie to New Orleans and to Letty. Bernie seemed to me to be a pretty Orthodox Jew as he recited Hebrew in the Temple, tried to follow a kosher diet (not always easy in the army), and always followed the rituals of the Sabbath Day. Meeting Letty and some other Jewish folks in New Orleans was quite a rude awakening as to how these people were living. I mean what Jewish mother in her right mind would serve pork for dinner?
Letty is a sweet girl that seems to be fully controlled by her parents. Bernie definitely throws off the entire plan that they have for her by winning her heart. As Bernie gives Letty a desire to live her life for herself rather than depending upon them for every need. When Bernie and Letty decide to start a life together they decide to stay in New Orleans, which happens to keep them under her parents umbrella. This is very frustrating for the young family as Letty's parents seem to find ways to keep them dependent on the finances they have available.
Letty's parents do not seem to realize how deeply the Holocaust has effected Bernie. As their lives go, on all Letty can do is watch his health decline as he inwardly punishes himself for not being able to do more for his loved ones that he left in Germany. She is in a continuous battle with her parents to try to prove that Bernie is a good man that will take care of their needs sufficiently.
When Letty gives birth to Darby that just seems to be the final anchor that her parents need to be able to control their lives. We see Darby's own struggles as her father tries to instill his Jewish traditions within her while Letty's parents are just trying to forget all of the rituals that go with their religion. They do have a very special father/daughter relationship as Bernie seems to be able to relate to Darby in such an honest way.
This was such a sad story as we watch what is like for Bernie to adapt to life in the United States while knowing what is happening to his loved ones in Germany. It would have been nice if his new in-laws understood Bernie's pain and accepted him lovingly into their family. This made for a tremendous amount of familial controversy, which was really hard for me to comprehend how people can be so selfish. With themes of the Holocaust, family, honor, and traditions, I found this to be an enjoyable but yet heart-wrenching book. I believe that this book was written for the enjoyment of the Young Adult audience, but really any age group can learn from these pages.
April 15, 2012
Patty Friedman's Too Jewish is deceptively simple. It is three overlapping first-person stories that collectively chronicle the life of Bernie, who flees Germany a nick ahead of the holocaust; of Letty, the woman from a wealthy New Orleans Jewish family who marries Bernie; and of Darby, their daughter.
Other novels have explored the stories of Jewish immigration to NYC. Friedman shows us an alternative path, a path where the existing Jewish community is not welcoming and sympatheic, but disapproving, even caustic.
The title refers to the derogatory term assimilated Jews in NOLA use to judge Jews who hold on to their more European observances. Darby's grandmother (Bernie's mother-in-law and Letty's mother, get it?), is one of the most unrelentingly unpleasant characters I've ever read outside of fairy tales, and she seems modeled on the evil stepmother archetype, or stereotype when Friedman just lays it on too thick.
What starts as a comedy of manners-- the customs of assimilated NOLA Jews, the behavior of young adults in a private school --soon hops into a comedy of humors as we encounter individual characters who cross lines even within their own circles, and then turns disturbing and tragic. In "Too Jewish," evil is seductive, both on global and local levels. When a character starts to believe that being "Too Jewish" is a crime, even in innocent moments as when Darby wants shorty pajamas because they are "in," the door opens to let in murder if murder wants to get in. Murders wants to get in.
At times, the book crosses over from deceptively simple to facile, for example Letty's sudden conversion at the end of Darby's story and what took her so long in the first place? But at the end I am left with a fine novel that leaves me with some frightening thoughts about the inevitability and dangers of compromise.
A final note. I read this book on a Kindle (I'm conflicted about this). "Too Jewish" recently had its hardcover and paperback ink-on-paper lifetime, and it received good reviews. But now it has come back as a discounted ($4.99) eBook where it has become a Kindle best-seller.
Other novels have explored the stories of Jewish immigration to NYC. Friedman shows us an alternative path, a path where the existing Jewish community is not welcoming and sympatheic, but disapproving, even caustic.
The title refers to the derogatory term assimilated Jews in NOLA use to judge Jews who hold on to their more European observances. Darby's grandmother (Bernie's mother-in-law and Letty's mother, get it?), is one of the most unrelentingly unpleasant characters I've ever read outside of fairy tales, and she seems modeled on the evil stepmother archetype, or stereotype when Friedman just lays it on too thick.
What starts as a comedy of manners-- the customs of assimilated NOLA Jews, the behavior of young adults in a private school --soon hops into a comedy of humors as we encounter individual characters who cross lines even within their own circles, and then turns disturbing and tragic. In "Too Jewish," evil is seductive, both on global and local levels. When a character starts to believe that being "Too Jewish" is a crime, even in innocent moments as when Darby wants shorty pajamas because they are "in," the door opens to let in murder if murder wants to get in. Murders wants to get in.
At times, the book crosses over from deceptively simple to facile, for example Letty's sudden conversion at the end of Darby's story and what took her so long in the first place? But at the end I am left with a fine novel that leaves me with some frightening thoughts about the inevitability and dangers of compromise.
A final note. I read this book on a Kindle (I'm conflicted about this). "Too Jewish" recently had its hardcover and paperback ink-on-paper lifetime, and it received good reviews. But now it has come back as a discounted ($4.99) eBook where it has become a Kindle best-seller.
July 11, 2013
Good book. I am having trouble deciding on whether to give this 3 or 4 stars. I usually save 4s for books I will never forget and I totally love and I can't decide if this is one of those books or not.
I have it in my biography folder even though the book is categorized as fiction. The book is about the author's father who as a 23 year old young man (and Jewish) escaped from Nazi German at the last possible minute...leaving his mother behind. This is his story, and is told from 3 people, the man, his wife and their child.
I have read over 50 Holocaust books over the years and I learned some things in this book. One of the things that shocked me what the hate and prejudice the more liberal Jews had for some of the traditional Jews that escaped the Holocaust. The author uses the book to describe her father's life as well has his trial and tribulations, including dealing with the fact that he left his mother behind.
I have it in my biography folder even though the book is categorized as fiction. The book is about the author's father who as a 23 year old young man (and Jewish) escaped from Nazi German at the last possible minute...leaving his mother behind. This is his story, and is told from 3 people, the man, his wife and their child.
I have read over 50 Holocaust books over the years and I learned some things in this book. One of the things that shocked me what the hate and prejudice the more liberal Jews had for some of the traditional Jews that escaped the Holocaust. The author uses the book to describe her father's life as well has his trial and tribulations, including dealing with the fact that he left his mother behind.
March 3, 2015
"Too Jewish" by Patty Friedmann was a very good read. I liked the way the author told the story from the perspective of Bernie (the German Jewish immigrant who left Germany when Hitler started annihilating the Jews; he had tried to get his Mother to leave with him, but she didn't believe Hitler really intended to exterminate the Jews. She realized too late he was as evil as her son tried to tell her.), Letty (the New Orleans girl he met during the war and he came back and married after the war, much against her families wishes. Her family didn't like Bernie because he was an observant Jew "Too Jewish" and they were Reform...very Reformed "Almost Episcopalians." They tried to destroy their marriage until the very end.), and Darby (their daughter). Through their eyes I could visualize the numerous characters. It was a sad ending, but not at all unbelievable.
April 2, 2012
From the 1st page until the page I was wrapped in emotions. I am a 45yo converted Jew, married to a man who was raised Jewish and whose grandparents were immigrants from Hungary and Italy at the start of WW2. The story grabbed me, it hurt my heart, it made me sad and it made me angry. Those are good things because it means that the author grabbed ME and pulled me in to the story she was telling. The end moved me to sobbing tears, my heart broke for Bernie. What makes a novel excellent is that it stays with you forever. I don't remember the titles of bad novels, I read too much to remember the bad ones, but I do remember the outstanding ones. I will never forget Too Jewish, it will stay in my heart forever.
January 6, 2013
I bought this book after I came back from working in America as gap year since I tried to figure out what the Jewish culture like and I thought it woudl be a great idea to start hearing some stories of the old Jews. Well, I finished this book during the first month I came back to England and so the American memories can still come up to my mind when reading the book. A good write about this particur Jew's family and what difficulties they came across within the sociaty and within the family itself.
April 28, 2014
An Emotional Experience
Ms. Friedman has created a small cast which comes to life in this book. They are real people some of whom you come to love and some you hate. I cheered the good people and was disgusted with the bad ones, but I was devastated and emotionally torn at the end. This was easily a five star book which I can fully recommend.
Ms. Friedman has created a small cast which comes to life in this book. They are real people some of whom you come to love and some you hate. I cheered the good people and was disgusted with the bad ones, but I was devastated and emotionally torn at the end. This was easily a five star book which I can fully recommend.
February 19, 2015
Much better than I expected
Worth at least 3.5 stars, and it could have been four had the editing been better. I did not expect to appreciate this book as much as I do. It gave me a different perspective on those Jews who were left with the terrible plight of survivor's guilt. It has left me with a lot to contemplative.
Worth at least 3.5 stars, and it could have been four had the editing been better. I did not expect to appreciate this book as much as I do. It gave me a different perspective on those Jews who were left with the terrible plight of survivor's guilt. It has left me with a lot to contemplative.
June 8, 2013
There should be a Did Not Finish because I didn't care star.
June 27, 2024
What a sad, moving, and memorable story. The meaness of teen behaviour, cruel and unfeeling, the stupidity of bigotry and entrenched positions, the legacy of Nazi Germany to those who survived. Surviver guilt. Bigotry and prejudice. It's all in this sad and well written gem of a book.
It's been on my kindle for an age, and I've only just got around to reading it. The three person telling of the story works and the book touched me. I could find no redeeming features at all in the grandparents and couldn't understand Letty,'s insistence in staying and not moving to New York. A sobering read, quickly read. Really sad. Bernie oh my ........
It's been on my kindle for an age, and I've only just got around to reading it. The three person telling of the story works and the book touched me. I could find no redeeming features at all in the grandparents and couldn't understand Letty,'s insistence in staying and not moving to New York. A sobering read, quickly read. Really sad. Bernie oh my ........
September 14, 2018
Fact or Fiction
This is one of those stories where you just know it could have happened as written! It could have happened in any faith! It could have happened anywhere human beings are prejudiced (even within their own group!), mean-spirited, full of themselves and not in touch with any type of Golden Rule!
Well written, characters grab you enough that you want to throttle some! Sorry line has some very unexpected twists... You will need tissues!!!
This is one of those stories where you just know it could have happened as written! It could have happened in any faith! It could have happened anywhere human beings are prejudiced (even within their own group!), mean-spirited, full of themselves and not in touch with any type of Golden Rule!
Well written, characters grab you enough that you want to throttle some! Sorry line has some very unexpected twists... You will need tissues!!!
February 6, 2021
The ending was unexpected, which to me highlights a 'good read'. The subplot of the Adler family unhappy being Jewish, almost embarrassed to be Jewish and doing everything they could to be 'less Jewish' as their daughter builds a relationship and will eventually marry someone who escaped the Nazi's but could not get his own mother to come with him...to me was so stark. The disdain they showed was clear and the privilege that money gave them was always the weapon they wielded.
April 25, 2019
2.5, but Goodreads won't do halves.
I had problems with the characters not getting out of a situation that was mentally abusive and exhausting. Often the chapter for a character's side of the story got whiny or rambled, trying to justify their behavior... and very little can justify keeping your family in psychological warfare, especially when you have the means to leave.
I had problems with the characters not getting out of a situation that was mentally abusive and exhausting. Often the chapter for a character's side of the story got whiny or rambled, trying to justify their behavior... and very little can justify keeping your family in psychological warfare, especially when you have the means to leave.
September 14, 2018
The story of a young Jewish man who leaves Germany just before the war. He joins the US Army and is stationed in New Orleans. The story tells of his life, his wife, and later his daughter. It tells of the problems of being Jewish in New Orleans and having in-laws that can't stand you.
March 11, 2020
Interesting read especially if you are Jewish.
I. Not going to say this is great literature, but I will say it is an interesting cultural insight into living in the South as a Jew. An easy read. I recommend it.
I. Not going to say this is great literature, but I will say it is an interesting cultural insight into living in the South as a Jew. An easy read. I recommend it.
January 1, 2023
This story was written from the perspective of the three family members, each taking their turn to share their life with the reader. A heartbreaking story of discrimination, persecution, perseverance, love and loyalty.
November 18, 2017
The first third of the book was great, but it kind of went downhill from there. Ending didn't feel satisfying--forced.
August 27, 2018
I didn't like the Letty `character. Yes, her parents were snobs but she let them use her and that was worse.
March 26, 2019
What price for freedom?
A story about rich parents who want to continue to control their daughter and what it took for the daughter to stand up for herself.
A story about rich parents who want to continue to control their daughter and what it took for the daughter to stand up for herself.
January 3, 2020
Tough read
I liked the story and this was a quick little read. I guess I just found it depressing people spending their whole lives in their own way.
I liked the story and this was a quick little read. I guess I just found it depressing people spending their whole lives in their own way.
September 22, 2021
Started reading and it was slow paced. I couldn't get into it.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 116 reviews