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Godspeed
Jim is a speed-freak bike messenger whose devotion to her drug habit rivals the intensity of her adoration for Ally, her brilliant stripper girlfriend. When she's forced to choose between drugs and the girl, time and again she succumbs to her addiction-but somehow she's still unable to attain the ultimate high she seeks. After losing her messenger job, Jim works first as a downwardly spiraling drug dealer, then as a roadie for a touring all-girl punk band, and engages in short-lived halfhearted romances while pining for Ally. She winds up staying in a squat house in New York City when the roadie gig ends, and finally begins cleaning up her act. But upon eventually returning home to San Francisco, Jim finds that things have changed in a way she can't reconcile. It's only then she realizes the ultimate rush can't be found in sex, drugs, violence, or even Ally-the source of her rapture is something else entirely.
240 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2002
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700 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 67 reviews
November 12, 2011
Very fast fun book. Inside scoop: story is SOMEWHAT based in real life, though very very fictionalized too. For instance, I didn't become a junkie (not with heroin anyway) and Lynn was sober when we were together (the ultimatum was about monogamy). What's beautiful about the book is the recurring motif of "vehicles of travel" as both concept and metaphor - the book asks "what is motion" and "what is stasis" and reinvestigates ideas of "progress" as the main character continually zings and flings around and escapes. The writing itself performs forms of motion, and this idea of traveling between states, places, and identities underlies a deeper gender philosophy and political stance within the novel.
November 20, 2008
i once met someone who claimed that this was his favorite book. i don't get that. this book kind of sucks. it's the story of a speed freak bicycle messenger of indeterminate gender & sexuality, but there's probably a queer element in there somewhere. basically this kid wrecks everything through being a drug addict. romantic relationships, jobs, band, everything, & seems totally unprentant about it, except maybe the protaganist finally kicks drugs in the end or something. it's a classic example of one of those novels that pretty much hinges on the fact that it contains a lot of sub-cultural references (in this case, san francisco queer/bike/drug/punk culture). sub-cultural references don't really mean much without a plot though. & yet, books like this (much like michelle tea's fastidiously dull work) are celebrated throughout the queer/punk land because it is representative of some small slice of certain people's culture. i mean...really? people WANT to be represented as completely boring & devoid of sympathetic characteristics? because believe you me, being a speed freak bike courier doesn't actually impress me very much. i don't know. trees died for this. it's a bummer. & yet, i read it twice, in a pathetic attempt to glean meaning & an explanation for its popularity.
April 10, 2009
Having dealt with more than my fair share of annoying speed addicts, I was a little hesitant to read Godspeed. However, having also spent a lot of time around Tribe-8's music and lots of wonderful, swaggering women over the years, I decided it was worth taking a look.
With the personal stuff in mind, I must say that this is the *best* look at methamphetamine abuse and denial behavior I've ever read. In an odd twist, it made me MORE sympathetic to people who suffer from meth abuse and constant denial, even though I still deal with them with the same tough love as always. The first-person telling really helped, and though the consistency of Jim's "give a s**t" behavior really bugged me at first, as the character came to realize the error of hier ways, the whole thing made a lot more sense. It really is a work of art, this book, and it takes a reader stepping outside of him or herself -- the character is not *you*, after all -- to get at what Breedlove wrote about in Godspeed.
The gallows-humored, first-person view Breedlove writes in with Godspeed isn't for everyone; the same people who didn't like M, Fight Club or Wiseguys probably won't like a book like this, either. For the rest of us, however, this is an *amazing* treatment of the subjects of addiction and denial.
With the personal stuff in mind, I must say that this is the *best* look at methamphetamine abuse and denial behavior I've ever read. In an odd twist, it made me MORE sympathetic to people who suffer from meth abuse and constant denial, even though I still deal with them with the same tough love as always. The first-person telling really helped, and though the consistency of Jim's "give a s**t" behavior really bugged me at first, as the character came to realize the error of hier ways, the whole thing made a lot more sense. It really is a work of art, this book, and it takes a reader stepping outside of him or herself -- the character is not *you*, after all -- to get at what Breedlove wrote about in Godspeed.
The gallows-humored, first-person view Breedlove writes in with Godspeed isn't for everyone; the same people who didn't like M, Fight Club or Wiseguys probably won't like a book like this, either. For the rest of us, however, this is an *amazing* treatment of the subjects of addiction and denial.
January 13, 2011
Geez. What did I think of this book?
This is the filthy gutterpunk account of Jim, a speed freak, unemployable bike messenger, genderfucking dyke-ish person of indeterminate gender and sexuality from the Bay Area (of course) who is forced to choose between the love of her life (a stripper, of course) and drugs (of course). It's totally trashy, escapist literature. I wish I had read it on a plane or a beach in long stretches of time, instead of little bits of lunch breaks and bedtimes. It probably would have been more enjoyable if I could have sunk into the whole world of Jim & not been distracted by everything else in my life.
It's almost a love story, but not really. There is a lot of self-absorbed, redundant, pedantic addict rambling. Then Jim goes on tour as a roadie with a dyke/feminist rock band, ends up in NYC living in a squat and becomes a different person, basically. Jim throws all the personal growth of NYC away and returns to the West Coast and then the book ends. The first 3/4 of the book drags on and on, in that annoying way like... I mean, have you ever tried to have a conversation with a speed freak? It's like that for about 220 pages, and then there are some lovely moments in NYC where everything seems possible, there is a queer revolution bearing down imminently; rise up brothers and systers: the world seems bigger than the next little balloon of drugs. So, there's that quickly-fleeting relief of redemption and possibility, which is nice.
The characters are not especially likeable and the plot is not especially intriguing. It's very much like some Michelle Tea books I've read in a lot of ways: the way it's paced, subject matter (urban life, violence, family issues, drugs & pussy), relative apathy to whether the reader can differentiate between reality and drug-induced paranoia and hallucinations, etc. There are some really classic tropes of Extreme Dyke Lit in this book, and I wasn't sure if they were predictable, overwrought clichés or a postmodern intertextual reference to the predictable, overwrought clichés. I mean, it's Lynn Breedlove. It's impossible to be certain.
This is the filthy gutterpunk account of Jim, a speed freak, unemployable bike messenger, genderfucking dyke-ish person of indeterminate gender and sexuality from the Bay Area (of course) who is forced to choose between the love of her life (a stripper, of course) and drugs (of course). It's totally trashy, escapist literature. I wish I had read it on a plane or a beach in long stretches of time, instead of little bits of lunch breaks and bedtimes. It probably would have been more enjoyable if I could have sunk into the whole world of Jim & not been distracted by everything else in my life.
It's almost a love story, but not really. There is a lot of self-absorbed, redundant, pedantic addict rambling. Then Jim goes on tour as a roadie with a dyke/feminist rock band, ends up in NYC living in a squat and becomes a different person, basically. Jim throws all the personal growth of NYC away and returns to the West Coast and then the book ends. The first 3/4 of the book drags on and on, in that annoying way like... I mean, have you ever tried to have a conversation with a speed freak? It's like that for about 220 pages, and then there are some lovely moments in NYC where everything seems possible, there is a queer revolution bearing down imminently; rise up brothers and systers: the world seems bigger than the next little balloon of drugs. So, there's that quickly-fleeting relief of redemption and possibility, which is nice.
The characters are not especially likeable and the plot is not especially intriguing. It's very much like some Michelle Tea books I've read in a lot of ways: the way it's paced, subject matter (urban life, violence, family issues, drugs & pussy), relative apathy to whether the reader can differentiate between reality and drug-induced paranoia and hallucinations, etc. There are some really classic tropes of Extreme Dyke Lit in this book, and I wasn't sure if they were predictable, overwrought clichés or a postmodern intertextual reference to the predictable, overwrought clichés. I mean, it's Lynn Breedlove. It's impossible to be certain.
July 20, 2013
I think i wanted to like this a lot more than I actually did. Some of Lynn's prose is great, especially the parts about her falling in love with Ally, but the rest was pretty repetitive. Lots of fights, lots of bike messenger bro talk, lots of drug talk... all of which quickly starts to get boring. Also not sure what was up with the constant bringing up of her mother in a sexual context, but that got old really fast. Also, I haven't seen this mentioned in many reviews but there is A LOT of sexual assault in this book, both talked about and experienced, and there is a scene that I found really disturbing where the main character Jim goes down on an unconscious woman :(
Want to read
April 9, 2009I love Lynn Breedlove and can't wait to read this book
Read
January 2, 2011loved it, couldn't stop reading it. so grateful to finally be reading about grrrls/dykes who are loud, brash and unapologetic.
Read
July 30, 2011This book is amazing!
June 7, 2018
What do I think? I think you should read this book.
October 21, 2017
This is a love story like none I have ever read before. It is like the movie "True Romance" on acid.
It needs every content warning available and should not be read if anything offends you. It should be read for that reason!
On a personal note, this book might not have been the best choice to take to a rehab facility. Oops.
It needs every content warning available and should not be read if anything offends you. It should be read for that reason!
On a personal note, this book might not have been the best choice to take to a rehab facility. Oops.
February 5, 2019
I wish I’d read this in my 20s, because I spent the first half of the book wanting to scream “GROW UP!” at poor Jim. The book also skated over some really interesting action with only a paragraph or two, which I found frustrating. Still, I enjoyed it— a quick and raw novel featuring a band of misfit toys.
July 3, 2019
I really liked Godspeed. I thought that Jim was a great character; made up of sick and twisted and wonderful and sensitive things, just like people are. The prose is literally intoxicating. Fair warning, though: this read is not for the faint of heart. Drug use/abuse/addiction, rape/sexual assault, etc. etc.
August 19, 2018
Seminal reading for queer bike punks.
March 3, 2019
Okay most of the way through, some parts more compelling than others, but it really went off the rails at the end in a disconcerting and unsatisfying way.
February 2, 2020
I adore this book. Lynnie Breedlove is one of the purest humans, and the writing is so evocative of the San Francisco queer punk scene in the 90s.
August 17, 2023
really wish i had liked this more but the last half or so was such a slog for me
January 19, 2024
very gay and edgy, but not super memorable or coherent. i enjoyed the narrator’s gender troubles and gay yearning but otherwise didn’t relate too much to them
January 22, 2024
3.5, really enjoyed a lot of this but felt like a push to get through some parts… will def read again to see if my thoughts change, maybe i just wasn’t in the right mood
November 6, 2008
it's really hard to read this and not think of valencia. crazy gay girls running around getting their hearts broken, drugs, sex workers, san francisco, etc, etc. and i keep going back to valencia in my head and trying to see what i loved there that's not here. i think maybe it's the flow, and the purpose. valencia is possibly just as meandering a book, but seems much more cohesive and smooth. but i'm already a michelle tea fan. and michelle tea is a lynn breedlove fan, or so says my back cover. so am i, therefore, a lynn breedlove fan?
i think the pace of the first few pages are unsustainable through the book, the narration of a bike messenger on speed definitely sets a very specific stage, but just as anyone on any drug gets intensely annoying after a while (unless you're possibly on drugs as well), the character got annoying, then the book got to this weird state of tedious annoy-ment, where i'd read it half-asleep waiting for what would hopefully be a change of pace. which, thankfully, came a few times, and was welcome every time. but still. i feel like, if you've read one drug book, you've kind of read them all (ditto mental institutions). acid trips, by their sheer definition, never make sense and sort of blend together (though i do have a particular favorite in another book). later events took on the characteristics of an acid trip, which made everything a little... hazy, especially when the supposed jackpot revelatory moment was supposed to be coming up.
my other beef is that everything that i would have gotten out of this book i've gotten better from another source, which is unfortunate, because it makes me think i'm reading this out of order, and had i read it when it was published, it would have been that closer to the time period it's set it, and the world would have looked more similar. more shootouts in the east village instead of condos. though maybe not, because it shouldn't matter how much time is between a book existing and the time period being written about, right?
i think the pace of the first few pages are unsustainable through the book, the narration of a bike messenger on speed definitely sets a very specific stage, but just as anyone on any drug gets intensely annoying after a while (unless you're possibly on drugs as well), the character got annoying, then the book got to this weird state of tedious annoy-ment, where i'd read it half-asleep waiting for what would hopefully be a change of pace. which, thankfully, came a few times, and was welcome every time. but still. i feel like, if you've read one drug book, you've kind of read them all (ditto mental institutions). acid trips, by their sheer definition, never make sense and sort of blend together (though i do have a particular favorite in another book). later events took on the characteristics of an acid trip, which made everything a little... hazy, especially when the supposed jackpot revelatory moment was supposed to be coming up.
my other beef is that everything that i would have gotten out of this book i've gotten better from another source, which is unfortunate, because it makes me think i'm reading this out of order, and had i read it when it was published, it would have been that closer to the time period it's set it, and the world would have looked more similar. more shootouts in the east village instead of condos. though maybe not, because it shouldn't matter how much time is between a book existing and the time period being written about, right?
November 29, 2008
Godspeed by lynn breedlove is a very san francisco book. Since I live here in sf, it automatically interested me. This book is about a drug addict bike messenger, set mainly here in sf, probably ten (15? 20?) or so years ago, although it doesn't give a time frame. Reading the book reminded me of when I went to see the sister spit thing when their tour came through. I think the factory she visited in providence was even the same one they talked about during their show. Anyway, I liked and didn't like this book… it was very sad. There are times in the book when jim has hit rock bottom. Covered in scabs, no home, no job, eating out of dumpsters… and yet has loving parents that live not too far away. There was a part in the book that stood out, where jim was describing how people got that way. First you do it to be brave, to feel the rush, ignoring the inner voices that are saying this is a bad idea (ew I cannot imagine putting acid in my eyeball ewww) and then you use more and keep moving into and out of crowds, as each crowd starts looking at you funny because you do too much and have gone too far. Until you're at the end. And we all know that happens to people all the time. Anyway, by the end of the book, she's in NYC, and it totally reminded me of Rent. And, no that's not really a spoiler. I think this is a pretty realistic, and pretty engrossing book, even if you keep shying away from it even as you read it. I definitely started caring about Jim and what happened to her. Will she stay clean? Will she live? Will she die? Will she get her love Ally? Stay tuned and read the book to find out.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 17, 2007
This was pretty good. Lynn Breedlove is a member of Tribe 8, which I gather is a lesbian punk band. The book features a butch punk dyke named Jim who is addicted to heroin and in love with a stripper. Oh and she's a bike courier. She was a really cool character, but the writing style seemed like it was trying too obviously hard to be cool. At first I thought it was cool, but then it just seemed wearing. A randon sample:
"That's when the orange syringe cap on the street looms godlike. It disappears in a blur under wheels and feet. It rewinds and plays back again and again thirty times, the same piece of plastic, block after block, burning bush, big as shit, alert alert right there in the street, saying, Hi, you need to get fucked up."
Also the ending seemed a little weak. Would she get the stripper, would she meet someone else? No, she biked off into the sunset. Lame. Part of it takes place in NYC, when she's a roadie with a lesbian punk band, the rest is in San Francisco. It captures the scene pretty well I think, from a totally drugged out point of view anyway. I think this type of heroine (no pun intended) is needed in literature, but I wish someone could take it a little further than this book does. As it is, it is a colorful look at the life, with a weak plot and a 'cool' chip on it's shoulder.
"That's when the orange syringe cap on the street looms godlike. It disappears in a blur under wheels and feet. It rewinds and plays back again and again thirty times, the same piece of plastic, block after block, burning bush, big as shit, alert alert right there in the street, saying, Hi, you need to get fucked up."
Also the ending seemed a little weak. Would she get the stripper, would she meet someone else? No, she biked off into the sunset. Lame. Part of it takes place in NYC, when she's a roadie with a lesbian punk band, the rest is in San Francisco. It captures the scene pretty well I think, from a totally drugged out point of view anyway. I think this type of heroine (no pun intended) is needed in literature, but I wish someone could take it a little further than this book does. As it is, it is a colorful look at the life, with a weak plot and a 'cool' chip on it's shoulder.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 4, 2008
I was surprised by how much I liked this book. I'm really not a sex-drugs-rock-and-roll type, and this book really is - but other than a few loose ends and sometimes an overheaping of grit, this book was really strong. there was an underlying sweetness to it, and a real honesty about change, confusion, temptation, and ambivalence. some books do a lot of grit for the sake of grit, and lots of violence and lawlessness just smashed over your head in order to feel the smash. other books are really invested in themes of redemption and re-establishment of order. this book doesn't really do either (well, sometimes the grit for the same of grit), but it manages to put forward a character who is really human. fucked up, loving, torn, trying to sort out threads of the past, drawn to pleasure, and wanting meaning. likable, even if I kept thinking "don't do it! hold out for what you REALLY want!"
July 9, 2008
This book is complicated. I've been meaning to buy it since I first picked it up from the library some years ago 'cause I love Godspeed and keep re-reading it, but somehow I've never gotten around to doing it. I think I have a love/hate relationship with this semi-autobiographical novel... There are parts I hate so much within it, mostly involving certain unwise decisions by protagonist Jim, and yet I can't help pitying and caring about him/her.
I'd recommend the novel if only for the awesome descriptions of biking through the streets of an older, edgier San Fransisco. (Note: the earlier parts of this novel go very well with the song "Daredevil Delivery" by Lynnee Breedlove's ex-band, Tribe 8.)
I'd recommend the novel if only for the awesome descriptions of biking through the streets of an older, edgier San Fransisco. (Note: the earlier parts of this novel go very well with the song "Daredevil Delivery" by Lynnee Breedlove's ex-band, Tribe 8.)
September 22, 2008
As a fan of Breedlove's punk band Tribe 8 (they did a killer cover of the 70s rock classic Radar Love) I had to read this book. It is a slice of San Francisco in the 1990s. The punks, the queers, the bike messengers, the meth. (It's kind of weird now that I live in Washington where meth is the drug that all the rural communities get infected with creating all these horrible problems. When I lived in San Francisco meth was what all the hipsters did, kind of like the 1990s answer to coke in the 1980s.)
I digress. This book has a real stream of consciousness style and that may put some people off but I thought it went well with the story. Warning: the end of the book may make you feel like someone punched you in the stomach, it did to me.
I digress. This book has a real stream of consciousness style and that may put some people off but I thought it went well with the story. Warning: the end of the book may make you feel like someone punched you in the stomach, it did to me.
October 31, 2016
Gutterpunk prose. Speed, bikes, kink, genderqueers, butch/femme dynamics, vigilante feminist justice from a masculine perspective...shall I just start singing 'these are a few of my favorite things' now, or shall we wait? A dear friend gifted this book to me with a dear inscription included. My copy has since grown ragged as I think I've re-read it twice now, most recently in an up-till-midnite stretch of a day. There's a lot of layers to this book, and I love the wit, intellect, charm, and cadence of the narration, Jim feels like my brother.
Potentially triggering: rape, emotional/physical abuse, incest, drugs--lots of drugs, particularly of the smokeable/injectable variety, from speed to heroin.
Potentially triggering: rape, emotional/physical abuse, incest, drugs--lots of drugs, particularly of the smokeable/injectable variety, from speed to heroin.
December 6, 2014
This book was fun. I discovered it when I was venturing out alone into shady sections of outer Boston to attend queer performance events. There I was fortunate enough to hear the author read an excerpt from this book before it was even completed. Breedlove is a little crazy. Super high energy, either on speed or hyper-espresso filled, she's a character herself. I'm certain I heard her voice (it's hard to miss) coming over the loudspeaker at Michigan last year complaining that more womyn weren't naked like years ago. Anyway-this book is a fun novel about drugs and a stripper grrlfriend. Good beach book-
October 23, 2009
It's interesting to me that so many of the other reviews here say things like "not enough queerness, too many drugs" when it would seem to me that the whole point of the book *is* about the drug use. Sure, Lynnee wants to include les/trans/genderfuck characters, but the gist of what she is getting at are the repercussions of speed addiction....sexuality/gender are both second-story. Why not enjoy a story that has les/trans/genderfuck main characters, but doesn't focus solely on those themes?
For myself, I thought it was pretty close to a perfect examination...but, again, as another reviewer stated, maybe you need to have lived that life to appreciate what Lynnee was saying.
For myself, I thought it was pretty close to a perfect examination...but, again, as another reviewer stated, maybe you need to have lived that life to appreciate what Lynnee was saying.
December 16, 2009
I picked this book up because it seemed that if I wanted any claim to punk rock dyke-dom it was something I needed to read. I hated the first 50 pages or so, and it was only stubbornness that kept me reading. I've finished a lot of shitty books out of stubbornness, but this time it paid off.
Jim's gender resonated a lot with me. The idea of an in-between space, of being a boy who's happy with her body, of being a boy and a dyke at the same time. All of this was wonderful to read. Jim is a complicated character in many ways besides gender, and though the drug habit may not resonate with many people, her growth and ideas about community may.
Jim's gender resonated a lot with me. The idea of an in-between space, of being a boy who's happy with her body, of being a boy and a dyke at the same time. All of this was wonderful to read. Jim is a complicated character in many ways besides gender, and though the drug habit may not resonate with many people, her growth and ideas about community may.
Want to read
March 16, 2016I started reading this years ago and promptly stopped. I'm a fan of Lynn Breedlove and I'm also a former junky. I suppose I can say the fact that this triggered some very hard feelings so immensely within minutes means that it's well written. Too well for me to have continued with those feelings. After 11 years, not everything hits me like that. I hope to pick it up again another day, with a little more preparation and self care. Especially since, judging by the description, the protagonist does eventually get clean.
March 22, 2008
i dunno, i usually love recovery books & stuff by navel-gazing punks. i don't think i really dig the san francisco sister spit swagger tho. it's too precious & self-impressed for my taste.
oh, & i skimmed enough of the last 100 or so pages to realize the point of the book, & still couldn't bring myself to go back & finish it proper. i'd read enough versions of "i'm so awesome, even when i'm a bastard, i'm so awesome. also, i'm sometimes lame, but i do it awesomely."
oh, & i skimmed enough of the last 100 or so pages to realize the point of the book, & still couldn't bring myself to go back & finish it proper. i'd read enough versions of "i'm so awesome, even when i'm a bastard, i'm so awesome. also, i'm sometimes lame, but i do it awesomely."
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