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Exes and Ohs: A Downtown Girl's (Mostly Awkward) Tales of Love, Lust, Revenge, and a Little Facebook Stalking
Think you’ve have some outrageous dating horror stories? You don't have anything on Shallon Lester. Spunky Shallon Lester has accumulated more than her fair share of embarrassing stories. In this collection of hilarious essays, she chronicles her dorky, daring, and awkward journey from waitress at the ninth circle of hell known as Houston's Time Square restaurant, to columnist at one of New York's leading gossip magazines, to MTV reality star, gleefully weaving in stories of all boys she's loved, lost, and avenged along the way.Complete with cringe-worthy tales -The time a new boyfriend found the stockpile of Magnum condoms hidden under her bed-Getting caught stealing (borrowing?) bacon from her local supermarket-Unwittingly getting romantically involved with the leader of a mafia ring-Being dumped on Valentines Day (for the second year in a row), just minutes before being forced to attend El Concierto Del Amor con Marc Anthony
192 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2011
12 people are currently reading
287 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 37 reviews
May 20, 2020
I think this may be one of the most offensive, boring, unfunny and least self-aware books I’ve ever read.
Full review is here: https://youtu.be/znWaY9ag-X8
But, to summarise:
This is a fairly short book but it drags on forever. Each chapter lacks any real purpose, nevermind a cohesive narrative and the overall structure of the book is lacking. It opens and ends with not a bang, but a whimper.
As for the content... if you’re looking for a book with racism, sexism, treating people as objects, a grown adult boasting about predatory behaviour towards teenagers, narcissism, a worrying number of references to Hitler, manipulation and abuse, then this IS the book for you!
However if you prefer books that are amusing, smart, or display any kind of personal development, then you’d be much better off reading anything else.
Full review is here: https://youtu.be/znWaY9ag-X8
But, to summarise:
This is a fairly short book but it drags on forever. Each chapter lacks any real purpose, nevermind a cohesive narrative and the overall structure of the book is lacking. It opens and ends with not a bang, but a whimper.
As for the content... if you’re looking for a book with racism, sexism, treating people as objects, a grown adult boasting about predatory behaviour towards teenagers, narcissism, a worrying number of references to Hitler, manipulation and abuse, then this IS the book for you!
However if you prefer books that are amusing, smart, or display any kind of personal development, then you’d be much better off reading anything else.
September 11, 2011
Dear Twenty-Something Women,
I understand the desire to emulate the ladies of Sex and the City. Fabulous parties, moral ambiguity, cosmopolitans, an infinite conveyor belt loaded with hot men and even hotter clothes...what's not to love? But, not to hurt that pretty little head of yours, that's just good television. It's not real life. In real life, a sane woman would not scuff her $475 Manola Blaniks as she runs down a urine-staurated alley in an attempt to escape seeing her ex-boyfriend. A real friend does not make another friend feel bad because she won't slip her a check for a couple grand just because she has the cash. In the real world, it is not romantic to cheat on your current partner with a married friend, blaming fate and Shakespeare the entire time. Again, big fan, but still an intelligent woman able to discern fact from fiction. So, with that said, I beg all of you sweet, manipulative little darlings out there: please, for the love of mothers everywhere, stop spending your lives trying to be Carrie Bradshaw, Charlotte York, Samantha Jones and Miranda Hobbs. The show ended, GET OVER IT and find a new show!
As for you, Ms. Lester, aside from your absorption of the SATC lifestyle, you seem like a funny girl. . You also appear to be the only woman I've ever read to be so excited about your blond hair and fair skin. Seriously, you made mention of your extreme appreciation of the fact in every story. A note to the author: 50% of your readers are likely brunette so maybe kill sentences such as, "Brunettes are full of nasty surprises--unibrows, upper-lip hair, unintelligible accents--but blondes are lovely and always smell like Sun-Ripened Raspberry body spray." It just makes us brunettes want to rip out of every one of those blonde strands.
I understand the desire to emulate the ladies of Sex and the City. Fabulous parties, moral ambiguity, cosmopolitans, an infinite conveyor belt loaded with hot men and even hotter clothes...what's not to love? But, not to hurt that pretty little head of yours, that's just good television. It's not real life. In real life, a sane woman would not scuff her $475 Manola Blaniks as she runs down a urine-staurated alley in an attempt to escape seeing her ex-boyfriend. A real friend does not make another friend feel bad because she won't slip her a check for a couple grand just because she has the cash. In the real world, it is not romantic to cheat on your current partner with a married friend, blaming fate and Shakespeare the entire time. Again, big fan, but still an intelligent woman able to discern fact from fiction. So, with that said, I beg all of you sweet, manipulative little darlings out there: please, for the love of mothers everywhere, stop spending your lives trying to be Carrie Bradshaw, Charlotte York, Samantha Jones and Miranda Hobbs. The show ended, GET OVER IT and find a new show!
As for you, Ms. Lester, aside from your absorption of the SATC lifestyle, you seem like a funny girl. . You also appear to be the only woman I've ever read to be so excited about your blond hair and fair skin. Seriously, you made mention of your extreme appreciation of the fact in every story. A note to the author: 50% of your readers are likely brunette so maybe kill sentences such as, "Brunettes are full of nasty surprises--unibrows, upper-lip hair, unintelligible accents--but blondes are lovely and always smell like Sun-Ripened Raspberry body spray." It just makes us brunettes want to rip out of every one of those blonde strands.
April 19, 2016
This was painful to read, the narrator is sexist and bigoted and I couldn't stand to read it anymore. All of the plots were weak and uninteresting as well. I didn't finish it and I don't see myself ever doing so.
August 19, 2015
This booked should've been titled #WhiteGirlProblems.
The perfect book if you're in the mood for shallow, racist, and homophobic remarks.
The perfect book if you're in the mood for shallow, racist, and homophobic remarks.
August 19, 2023
Oh honey... Please never type again🥺
March 31, 2017
This book is so awful. I'm a fan of reading a fun, silly memoir every now and then but this book was almost unbearable. I finished it out of pure stubbornness, but it certainly wasn't worth it. The author is so narcissistic, racist, and honestly just boring. It's not even worth writing a review on, but I thought I might save someone the trouble of picking up this god-awful book.
June 29, 2011
This is just a perfectly fluffy, light summer beach read. Don't expect anything deep, poignant, or thought-provoking, just accept it for what it is: A Cosmopolitan article in book form.
July 11, 2011
Shallon Lester is an intriguing personality in just her seemingly unmarriageable traits: she's the girl who makes sure to give food to the homeless whenever she can but she also makes sure she exacts revenge on any enemy that crosses her (food seems to be her weapon of choice). In the end, Shallon is likeable because she doesn't hold back about any of these things - she can go from being obsessed about giving back to the community to being obsessed with becoming famous. Her honesty is clear, and her wit sharp as she divulges in some of the more messier chapters of her life as they relate to men. I laughed out loud quite a few times. A fun beach read for the summer.
June 28, 2011
Since Shallon is a Uni grad, a number of my Facebook friends notified everyone that her newest book was available, so I had it downloaded to my Kindle right away. It was a very fun read! So funny, partly because her life is so different from mine, but it is what I'd like mine to have been when I was in my twenties. It reads like a memoir with a clever amusing style that is consistently entertaining. Her adventures in Manhattan, full of name-dropping and restaurant-referencing, blend in well with her recollections of her growing up in Irvine, complete with references to Vista Nerdy, and Uni High Homecoming dances. The perfect book for me to read in the evenings when I'd been scoring AP essays all day far from home :-) Looking forward now to following her work online!
August 19, 2011
sometimes eh, sometimes really funny.... a very light read told in a bunch of short stories by a blogger and mtv reality star.... has some laugh out loud moments.... nice to have a breezy read for summer or travel.... would share with others... all in all enjoyed...
February 27, 2012
A very random collection of essays by a very disturbed mess. Albeit funny at times, this book us horribly written and is all over the place (much like the author I suppose)I hope Shallon Lester uses some of her profits for therapy.
August 4, 2011
LOVED this book!! A hilarious read about a 20something NYC gal and her trials and tribulations of single life & dating. She's witty, blunt, and sometimes a bit crass. I ::heart:: her.
August 7, 2021
I'm so happy to be done with this I could cry from relief! Reading this book can only be compared to being chased by your sleep paralysis demons.
At times in my life when I think I cannot possibly torture myself anymore I go and read crap like this. How do I even manage to describe how bad this book is?? I said in the progress update Shallon really decided she was going to be offensive to .every.single.group.of.people in the WORLD and she did it! I respect the commitment to being a resentful and hatred-filled bitch but she takes it too far! This book has rage-inducing stereotyping of people, fatshaming, bi erasure, and so much more.
Also, when literally no one in your life believes these things happened it's possibly time to brand the book as fiction. Because nearly all of it only happened in her head so...
Would I recommend this to anyone? Only if you really hate yourself and feel you haven't suffered enough in this life.
At times in my life when I think I cannot possibly torture myself anymore I go and read crap like this. How do I even manage to describe how bad this book is?? I said in the progress update Shallon really decided she was going to be offensive to .every.single.group.of.people in the WORLD and she did it! I respect the commitment to being a resentful and hatred-filled bitch but she takes it too far! This book has rage-inducing stereotyping of people, fatshaming, bi erasure, and so much more.
Also, when literally no one in your life believes these things happened it's possibly time to brand the book as fiction. Because nearly all of it only happened in her head so...
Would I recommend this to anyone? Only if you really hate yourself and feel you haven't suffered enough in this life.
November 20, 2017
Shallon Lester is quite an interesting individual. For the last five years, I've read her blog and listened to her advice on her Youtube page, and reading this story really tells the truth of not only her crazy new beginnings in New York, but also all of the things that can go wrong in a relationship! The ending was rather abrupt, but her short essays were full of (quite) awkward moments and stories that could pull a laugh, but probably not one I would reread.
3.5/5 stars
3.5/5 stars
July 20, 2020
I really loved it this. It’s cute, funny, and is filled with New Yorker stories. Shallon is hilarious. I personally loved the stalking stories the most. When Shallon was talking about her hockey player boyfriend, I related to her so much because everything she did, I constantly day dream of. Take this book of what it is- it is a memoir style, FUN book! Read it as such. Don’t take it too seriously.
November 21, 2019
Reading a book I marked "To-Read" over 8 years ago makes me wonder what kind of head space I was in then, or rather, what head space I've grown into. This was not my cup of tea, though perhaps it's because I'm not aimlessly wandering around in my 20s (it's now aimless wandering in my 30s).
August 18, 2021
Everything was all over the place.
I like Shallon, but I have to be honest, this is just .... NO.
2 stars for the bravery of reliving all those awkward cringy stories and exposing yourself to the whole world.
I like Shallon, but I have to be honest, this is just .... NO.
2 stars for the bravery of reliving all those awkward cringy stories and exposing yourself to the whole world.
December 26, 2019
She’s a phenomenal writer and youtuber. Funny and interesting book
January 1, 2020
Enjoyed it. It's exactly what it says on the cover. Nice, relaxing and entertaining read, quite funny at times.
Ps. I didn't expect to learn so many new words from this book but I did
Ps. I didn't expect to learn so many new words from this book but I did
May 3, 2015
This Novel is about the life of MTV reality-TV star, Shallon Lester. It is basically an autobiography about how through her awkward years, she got to be a TV star. She talks a lot about boys and dating as well since is also a dating columnist. I think the theme of this novel should be: To believe in your dreams. Since Shallon put a lot of dedication to what she believed in, she became a TV-star."Thanks to my inherent weirdness and endless string of dating debacles, I eventually landed myself an MTV reality TV show, Downtown Girls." (164)
My favorite character of this novel was the main character because I can definitely relate to her. She has an interesting personality which reminds me of me. When I was younger I was an awkward child and I'm sure that I'm not the only one. We have had our embarrassing moments that no one would want to remember, let alone write about it. I love how she shared them, I probably wouldn't and I admire her bravery. Just thinking about my embarrassing moments makes me shudder.This was more of a personal reaction because the author definitely did not intend for this, she is just writing her personal life and experiences. "If it hadn't happened to me, I would have laughed. It was eleven
p.m. on February 13, the night before Valentine's Day, and I was getting dumped. Again." (87)
I thought this book was intriguing, just reading other people's life makes me feel like it's mine. I would recommend this book, but not to manly males because she does talk A LOT about boys so most males would not want to read something like this and some females as well. This is not a romance novel so wouldn't recommend this to hopeless romantics. I probably would recommend it to people who like reality TV or more realistic books. I would categorize this as Teen to Young Adult novel. This book reminds me of fanfics although it is not fiction. Fanfics are something almost every teenage girl (of this generation) who likes boy bands read. I would recommend this book to the
fangirls of the world. It is a wonderful book that people could relate to and laugh along with. Also feel relieved that this is not their life. When reading this book it is like living a double life.
My favorite character of this novel was the main character because I can definitely relate to her. She has an interesting personality which reminds me of me. When I was younger I was an awkward child and I'm sure that I'm not the only one. We have had our embarrassing moments that no one would want to remember, let alone write about it. I love how she shared them, I probably wouldn't and I admire her bravery. Just thinking about my embarrassing moments makes me shudder.This was more of a personal reaction because the author definitely did not intend for this, she is just writing her personal life and experiences. "If it hadn't happened to me, I would have laughed. It was eleven
p.m. on February 13, the night before Valentine's Day, and I was getting dumped. Again." (87)
I thought this book was intriguing, just reading other people's life makes me feel like it's mine. I would recommend this book, but not to manly males because she does talk A LOT about boys so most males would not want to read something like this and some females as well. This is not a romance novel so wouldn't recommend this to hopeless romantics. I probably would recommend it to people who like reality TV or more realistic books. I would categorize this as Teen to Young Adult novel. This book reminds me of fanfics although it is not fiction. Fanfics are something almost every teenage girl (of this generation) who likes boy bands read. I would recommend this book to the
fangirls of the world. It is a wonderful book that people could relate to and laugh along with. Also feel relieved that this is not their life. When reading this book it is like living a double life.
March 25, 2025
⭐ 3 out of 5 stars
There’s something undeniably fun about reading Exes and Ohs. It’s bubbly, chaotic, dramatic—and delightfully self-aware. Shallon Lester, with her trademark sass and sharp tongue, brings her early 2000s-era dating escapades to life in a way that feels like a cocktail-fueled gossip session with your most unfiltered friend. It’s not high literature, and it doesn’t pretend to be—but it delivers exactly what the title promises: laughs, cringe, and a sprinkle of revenge.
🎤 The Shallon Effect
As a longtime Shalligator and daily viewer of her app and YouTube content, I went into this book already knowing her unique brand of humor, self-empowerment, and brutally honest dating advice. That familiarity made reading this memoir-style collection of essays feel even more intimate. It’s like watching early ShallonTV—raw, sparkly, and a little chaotic. For fans, that’s a feature, not a flaw.
💬 What Works:
Authentic Voice: You can hear Shallon’s voice on every page. Whether she’s plotting petty revenge or falling for the wrong guy (again), her voice is never dull. She owns her mistakes and misadventures with refreshing honesty.
Relatable Themes: From heartbreak and ghosting to the era of Facebook stalking (ah, memories!), many of these stories hit home for anyone who’s ever survived the dating scene in their 20s and 30s.
Entertainment Value: This is pure entertainment—ideal for a beach read, post-breakup pick-me-up, or an escape into someone else’s drama that, thankfully, isn’t yours.
✍️ What Fell Short:
As much as I love Shallon, I know she’s capable of more nuanced, evolved storytelling. Exes and Ohs feels very much like a time capsule—fun, but dated. The writing is casual to a fault, often sacrificing depth for sass. And while some stories had me laughing out loud, others felt repetitive or surface-level.
But let’s be honest—if you're picking this up for literary brilliance, you’ve missed the point. This is memoir-meets-comedy, and it never pretends to be anything more. Still, I’d love to see Shallon’s voice mature in a future project, especially in the fantasy novel she’s teased. She has the storytelling bones to pull it off—and I’m first in line when that book drops.
There’s something undeniably fun about reading Exes and Ohs. It’s bubbly, chaotic, dramatic—and delightfully self-aware. Shallon Lester, with her trademark sass and sharp tongue, brings her early 2000s-era dating escapades to life in a way that feels like a cocktail-fueled gossip session with your most unfiltered friend. It’s not high literature, and it doesn’t pretend to be—but it delivers exactly what the title promises: laughs, cringe, and a sprinkle of revenge.
🎤 The Shallon Effect
As a longtime Shalligator and daily viewer of her app and YouTube content, I went into this book already knowing her unique brand of humor, self-empowerment, and brutally honest dating advice. That familiarity made reading this memoir-style collection of essays feel even more intimate. It’s like watching early ShallonTV—raw, sparkly, and a little chaotic. For fans, that’s a feature, not a flaw.
💬 What Works:
Authentic Voice: You can hear Shallon’s voice on every page. Whether she’s plotting petty revenge or falling for the wrong guy (again), her voice is never dull. She owns her mistakes and misadventures with refreshing honesty.
Relatable Themes: From heartbreak and ghosting to the era of Facebook stalking (ah, memories!), many of these stories hit home for anyone who’s ever survived the dating scene in their 20s and 30s.
Entertainment Value: This is pure entertainment—ideal for a beach read, post-breakup pick-me-up, or an escape into someone else’s drama that, thankfully, isn’t yours.
✍️ What Fell Short:
As much as I love Shallon, I know she’s capable of more nuanced, evolved storytelling. Exes and Ohs feels very much like a time capsule—fun, but dated. The writing is casual to a fault, often sacrificing depth for sass. And while some stories had me laughing out loud, others felt repetitive or surface-level.
But let’s be honest—if you're picking this up for literary brilliance, you’ve missed the point. This is memoir-meets-comedy, and it never pretends to be anything more. Still, I’d love to see Shallon’s voice mature in a future project, especially in the fantasy novel she’s teased. She has the storytelling bones to pull it off—and I’m first in line when that book drops.
January 25, 2016
This was the perfect book to pull me out of a funk. It wasn't a guy related funk but I'm sure it'd give you a few laughs even as you mourn your unrequited love or jerk of an ex-boyfriend. My hardship was a broken blender.
The book had me laughing until I couldn't breathe, choking on my spit, tears leaking from my eyes and ending with me coughing like death is near. And for the time being I forgot my sorrows.
[UPDATE - JAN 2016]
Again I needed something to give me a couple quick and silly laughs, and returning to this I didn't find it as funny as I did the first time, but I definitely got a couple odd looks when I started laughing out loud in a group of friends.
The book had me laughing until I couldn't breathe, choking on my spit, tears leaking from my eyes and ending with me coughing like death is near. And for the time being I forgot my sorrows.
[UPDATE - JAN 2016]
Again I needed something to give me a couple quick and silly laughs, and returning to this I didn't find it as funny as I did the first time, but I definitely got a couple odd looks when I started laughing out loud in a group of friends.
August 7, 2011
Cracking me up every step of the way. Lester isn't the most squeaky-clean character and certainly isn't reasonable, but she's likable and in the end her faults become laughs. If I was to write a book it'd be something just like this one. A smidgen deeper, but (I hope) just as entertaining.
Want to read
April 24, 2025This book literally has no point and not in a fun way. She talks about shoplifting meat for the homeless, stalking her ex boyfriend, working as a waitress and how she got revenge on the restaurant. Believe me when I say my review is more entertaining than this book
August 23, 2011
Hilarious book. Lester's adventures were so outrageous you almost want to not believe them. It's a book of stories and good ones at that.
August 7, 2011
A great summer read -
October 11, 2011
A Fun and Hilarious read!
October 3, 2011
A friend loaned me this book, though it's not my typical read. It was entertaining and light, as the author shares her misadventures in dating.
August 10, 2012
Some parts were laugh-out-loud funny, but towards the end of the book, all of the essays started to seem the same. A short, fluffy, humorous read.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 37 reviews