Marital Intelligence: There Are Only 5 Problems in Marriage

by Gil Stieglitz

Marital Intelligence, subtitled “A foolproof guide for saving and supercharging marriage,” is based on thousands of hours of marital counseling and observation by the author. Stieglitz is a counselor, speaker, mentor, professor, and leadership consultant based in Roseville, Calif. He is currently a professor at Western Seminary, a district superintendent for the Evangelical Free Church of America, and a church consultant for Thriving Churches International. He also directs his own ministry, Principles to Live By. Stieglitz says there are only five problems in (1) Ignoring needs; (2) Immature behaviors, (3) Clashing temperaments, (4) Competing relationships, and (5) Past baggage. With each issue, he carefully and consistently lays out biblical teaching on the subject, and then includes helpful anecdotes, solutions, and self-tests to help the reader.

278 pages, Paperback

First published February 2, 2010

Reviews

[Debbie Carlson · Rating 4 out of 5]

My church used this book in a marriage class. It was actually causing our marriage to get worse, until we realized that my husband had a medical disorder that made it difficult to process and complete the suggestion in this book. We are in the process of getting him on meds and therapy. It that's not to say this book is wrong. I believe the author is right about marital issues falling into the five categories. I can easily see which categories my marriage has issues. I feel the author gives very good common sense solutions for each category. As any book on this subject, every couple's exact dynamics and issues cannot be addressed as we have been all created so different from one another. The author sticks with most common scenarios. For example, God made me a woman who is unable to bear children, however I was created with a deep desire and passion to have a career as a professional artist. Having a career is not a bad thing for my marriage. In fact, my husband and I enjoy time sharing talk about our careers and troubleshooting work problems. There was a time when I was younger that I felt bad around church people because I wasn't like everyone else, but it's important to remember that God knows just what He's doing by making each of us special. That goes also for my husband who is just now realizing that his brain works different than most of ours. I kinda wish that authors would put disclaimers at the beginning of their books addressing that.