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Fucking Trans Women
From the website:
"Trans women are told things about our sexualities all the time, but only rarely are we given the opportunity to say something about our own sex lives. Sex is a very important part of my life, a very important part of all our lives, but so very little writing has been done on the sex lives of trans women that doesn’t write us off in one way or another. I found myself looking for a guide, an instruction manual, anything beyond essays on gender and problems. Fucking Trans Women is that guide."
"Includes:
-How-to guides
-Sex stories
-Instructions for various kinds of sex acts
-The diversity of trans women's bodies
-Trashy art & comic strips
-Moments of triumph & tender anecdotes
-Passionate explorations of our lusty bodies
-Diagrams, and so much more!"
"Trans women are told things about our sexualities all the time, but only rarely are we given the opportunity to say something about our own sex lives. Sex is a very important part of my life, a very important part of all our lives, but so very little writing has been done on the sex lives of trans women that doesn’t write us off in one way or another. I found myself looking for a guide, an instruction manual, anything beyond essays on gender and problems. Fucking Trans Women is that guide."
"Includes:
-How-to guides
-Sex stories
-Instructions for various kinds of sex acts
-The diversity of trans women's bodies
-Trashy art & comic strips
-Moments of triumph & tender anecdotes
-Passionate explorations of our lusty bodies
-Diagrams, and so much more!"
80 pages, zine
First published October 1, 2010
65 people are currently reading
997 people want to read
About the author
Mira Bellwether
1 book18 followersMiranda Darling Bellwether was an American author, artist, and sex educator best known for Fucking Trans Women, a single-issue zine in which she wrote and illustrated all articles. Described in Sexuality & Culture as "a comprehensive guide to trans women's sexuality", Fucking Trans Women was the first publication of note to focus on sex with trans women and was innovative in its focus on trans women's own perspectives and its inclusion of instructions for many of the sex acts depicted.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 74 reviews
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March 26, 2023It’s tragic that #0 is all there is. Imagine if the project had grown into the community dialogue Mira Bellwether envisioned… Sigh. Glad that I sat down and read more than the bits and pieces I had perused since buying it a couple of years ago. More detailed review to come, maybe, but for now I’ll just say that this is smart, frank, sexy, and quotes Angela Carter, so you know I liked it.
October 24, 2020
This is just wonderful. It's rare that I feel this cared for, seen, and inspired by anything I read. Definitely inspires change in how I feel about myself, my body, my existence. There's so much here and it's so beautiful.
November 23, 2019
Ok so there's so much in this zine that is great, direct, and comforting.
My experience was marred, however, by a few things, especially as someone who's relatively new to the trans scene. Firstly, it is completely unreasonable to get impatient with someone who doesn't understand that you mean inguinal canals when you say "cunts" or glans when you say "clit". We all have our own standards and descriptions for ourselves, and they are always valid, but you can't expect someone to know these names immediately.
Secondly, communication is not always helpful. Folks don't always want to share their experiences, it can be upsetting or violating for some people and claiming that there's no excuse for not sharing, especially with ex-lovers, is once again unreasonable.
The third difficulty of the zine is the blanket statement that sperm donors do not get a say in the case of a surprise pregnancy. Making broad semi-political statements in a zine comes across as aggressive and preachy; it doesn't feel like an opinion or a dialogue.
But it's a good start. I'm glad it exists.
My experience was marred, however, by a few things, especially as someone who's relatively new to the trans scene. Firstly, it is completely unreasonable to get impatient with someone who doesn't understand that you mean inguinal canals when you say "cunts" or glans when you say "clit". We all have our own standards and descriptions for ourselves, and they are always valid, but you can't expect someone to know these names immediately.
Secondly, communication is not always helpful. Folks don't always want to share their experiences, it can be upsetting or violating for some people and claiming that there's no excuse for not sharing, especially with ex-lovers, is once again unreasonable.
The third difficulty of the zine is the blanket statement that sperm donors do not get a say in the case of a surprise pregnancy. Making broad semi-political statements in a zine comes across as aggressive and preachy; it doesn't feel like an opinion or a dialogue.
But it's a good start. I'm glad it exists.
July 18, 2018
What an incredible resource. Diagrams, instructions, and moving personal essays about sex from the perspective of a trans woman without bottom surgery living in Iowa (in and of itself an underrepresented voice in the current conversation about transness). This is lovely for those of us with a transfeminine partner, but also for me personally there is a lot of value to be taken from a nonbinary dyke perspective on sexuality. I only wish that Mira had been able to put out more issues!
February 8, 2025
Oh sick, this is on here.
I don't usually rate theory (this is theory, right?) but this one really fundamentally altered the entire baseline of my existence. The author was just like, "I don't presume to" and I was like, "Woah really? Is that real?" and sure enough it was, which fucking rules. "Did you know that", no I did fucking not!!!! Thank you for saying!!
I think I had too much imageboard brainrot before coming to this zine to figure it out myself, so reading this and getting the idea that gross fucking cisnormative views of things and bodies is not the be-all and end-all ended up playing a major part in where my stupid ass is today. It seems kind of stupid in retrospect that I needed to be made AWARE of re-sexing (the best theory is all homespun) as a concept, but I had only existed in spaces and relationships where cisnormativity was the only thing presented. It didn't really occur to me that "biology" and the terms that come with it are actually just made up by a guy, and this ended up showing me. FTW is incredible just on its own.
It makes me pretty sad every time I remember the author passed away. I don't really know how to express grief and I never spoke to her, but I kinda felt that. Even if the specifics might not be useful across the board, FTW is built different.
I don't usually rate theory (this is theory, right?) but this one really fundamentally altered the entire baseline of my existence. The author was just like, "I don't presume to" and I was like, "Woah really? Is that real?" and sure enough it was, which fucking rules. "Did you know that", no I did fucking not!!!! Thank you for saying!!
I think I had too much imageboard brainrot before coming to this zine to figure it out myself, so reading this and getting the idea that gross fucking cisnormative views of things and bodies is not the be-all and end-all ended up playing a major part in where my stupid ass is today. It seems kind of stupid in retrospect that I needed to be made AWARE of re-sexing (the best theory is all homespun) as a concept, but I had only existed in spaces and relationships where cisnormativity was the only thing presented. It didn't really occur to me that "biology" and the terms that come with it are actually just made up by a guy, and this ended up showing me. FTW is incredible just on its own.
It makes me pretty sad every time I remember the author passed away. I don't really know how to express grief and I never spoke to her, but I kinda felt that. Even if the specifics might not be useful across the board, FTW is built different.
May 22, 2023
Hot and slightly frustrated, heavy DIY vibes, sometimes fun, sometimes sad. The author (RIP) makes an appeal to (potential) sexual partners, allies, and friends of trans women to be considerate of the uniqueness of each woman's body, of the way trans women may experience the world in their bodies, and of how they may relate to those bodies and the way they function. Unsurprisingly, one of the core messages in a book about the way we connect with one another seems to be to COMMUNICATE about preferences, desires, boundaries, sensations, experiences, and emotions, and, in doing so, sharing intimacy and responsibility for each other's and our own well-being and pleasure.
November 23, 2019
Enlightening, educational, entertaining, edifying. Shared from the author's personal experience, with an invitation for more voices to chime in. I think there weren't any sequels, but i sure would like to read them. Fun and instructive illustrations, and a whole lotta love for self, body, sex positivity, letting go of imposed expectations and discovering one's own most pleasurable truth.
January 4, 2024
The Sex Ed we need!
October 31, 2025
if only i was actually into muffing 3
August 29, 2020
This review is not for moms, but if you're cis or scared, I highly reccomend you continue.
Self-presented as a cookbook, the zine provides a guide to a wide scope of issues as faced by one trans women, with the goal of serving as a practical introduction to sexual practice. It's firmly stated not as an introduction to trans women, nor an introduction to the discussion of terminology (although might fare more reasonably as the latter), but rather to an entirely different philosophy of finding pleasure and sharing the vulnerabilities of one's body and identity.
Bellwether sensitively and honestly explains her struggle to balance the teaching approach she finds necessary with most cis women with the frustration, objectification and vulnerability that surfaces for her when faced with a stronger focus on explanation than experimentation - especially given the traditional education on what sex is we've all been bathed in by popular media (read: p in v). With humorous candor and illustration that borrows as much from vintage pin-ups as it does comic books, Bellwether seeks to bridge this gap for all partners.
It dips it's proverbial toe into the problematic ideology of the "trap" meme and the sexist anti-lesbian sentiments that some women bring with them into performing some sexual acts.
It covers courting as sensitively as it does the confusing issue of insemination.
My favorite section covers adjusting around the effect testosterone blockers are known to encourage in flaccid penises. Not least because the generality of the advice opens the discussion up as an introduction to creative sexual practice and transformative boundary setting in sexual situations that I truly think applies to all people.
A note: Bellwether states throughout that this zine cannot serve as a compendium of trans experience as it focuses specifically on one woman's experience and approach to sex. As much as she tries to round out to non-generalized statements - it's worth stating that there is a sequel to this zine which focuses more on submitted commentary.
Self-presented as a cookbook, the zine provides a guide to a wide scope of issues as faced by one trans women, with the goal of serving as a practical introduction to sexual practice. It's firmly stated not as an introduction to trans women, nor an introduction to the discussion of terminology (although might fare more reasonably as the latter), but rather to an entirely different philosophy of finding pleasure and sharing the vulnerabilities of one's body and identity.
Bellwether sensitively and honestly explains her struggle to balance the teaching approach she finds necessary with most cis women with the frustration, objectification and vulnerability that surfaces for her when faced with a stronger focus on explanation than experimentation - especially given the traditional education on what sex is we've all been bathed in by popular media (read: p in v). With humorous candor and illustration that borrows as much from vintage pin-ups as it does comic books, Bellwether seeks to bridge this gap for all partners.
It dips it's proverbial toe into the problematic ideology of the "trap" meme and the sexist anti-lesbian sentiments that some women bring with them into performing some sexual acts.
It covers courting as sensitively as it does the confusing issue of insemination.
My favorite section covers adjusting around the effect testosterone blockers are known to encourage in flaccid penises. Not least because the generality of the advice opens the discussion up as an introduction to creative sexual practice and transformative boundary setting in sexual situations that I truly think applies to all people.
A note: Bellwether states throughout that this zine cannot serve as a compendium of trans experience as it focuses specifically on one woman's experience and approach to sex. As much as she tries to round out to non-generalized statements - it's worth stating that there is a sequel to this zine which focuses more on submitted commentary.
May 12, 2020
So much better than I'd expected!!!
With a title like "Fucking Trans Women" I had expected the tone of this zine to be brash.
I was extremely pleasantly surprised at the patience and conscientiousness of the zine.
She didn't assume you knew everything and were just looking for tips on how to really stand out.
As a trans/non-binary person, a few months into hormonal transition, I started noticing that the usual way that I received and provided pleasure to my partners was going to have to be adjusted. I was put onto this zine through a DailyDot article by Ana Valens called "Trans/Sex: Masturbation is tough for trans women. I know first-hand", and I'm very happy I ordered the zine!
Strongly recommend reading it!
With a title like "Fucking Trans Women" I had expected the tone of this zine to be brash.
I was extremely pleasantly surprised at the patience and conscientiousness of the zine.
She didn't assume you knew everything and were just looking for tips on how to really stand out.
As a trans/non-binary person, a few months into hormonal transition, I started noticing that the usual way that I received and provided pleasure to my partners was going to have to be adjusted. I was put onto this zine through a DailyDot article by Ana Valens called "Trans/Sex: Masturbation is tough for trans women. I know first-hand", and I'm very happy I ordered the zine!
Strongly recommend reading it!
October 28, 2021
Extremely educational and insightful, and I'd recommend everyone reads this because the attitudes and points ov view Bellwether covers are applicable to just about anyone, regerdless of who or how you want to fuck. Stellar work.
December 18, 2020
The sequel to sex ed that is much better than the original.
June 22, 2024
I finally know how to fuck trans women !!!!! This information will prove extremely valuable to me !!!!
June 13, 2023
Put 4 stars.
It was filled with very important information and honestly put into words some things I struggled with explaining about my own body. There are obviously always going to be missed elements in things like this, and experiences are so varied it's hard to even begin, but it was nice to see this information spelled out.
It was filled with very important information and honestly put into words some things I struggled with explaining about my own body. There are obviously always going to be missed elements in things like this, and experiences are so varied it's hard to even begin, but it was nice to see this information spelled out.
June 14, 2023
Very helpful and extremely informative read! It's obviously not a complete, all encompassing guide of every trans woman's, duh, but has a lot of valuable insight. I like this author's Voice a lot, she sounds very cute and fun. You can tell a lot of passion went into making this. I will say it was a little hard to physically read at some points, like the print size was a little too small and had some walls of text I found to be a little hard to get through (my own problems.) But still, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this as a nonbinary, genderfluid afab person myself!
My favorite section was the discussion that sex with your partner(s) should happen outside the bedroom, in a non-sexual way, as it helps keep the focus on communication and flow of dialogue. Not every sexual conversation needs to be a sexual encounter, especially when you're trying to communicate boundaries and your needs. It was very nice to see that said.
My favorite section was the discussion that sex with your partner(s) should happen outside the bedroom, in a non-sexual way, as it helps keep the focus on communication and flow of dialogue. Not every sexual conversation needs to be a sexual encounter, especially when you're trying to communicate boundaries and your needs. It was very nice to see that said.
February 20, 2019
Not well formatted for ebook
Lots of really good information in this zine, and I highly recommend checking it out! That said, there were several issues trying to read it on Kindle.
Reading it on my phone, the words were too small and I had to zoom in, often requiring me to move the focus about the page in order to continue reading. Then once I was done, I had to X out of the page before going to the next.
I tried to pull it up on my computer so the words would be larger, but on the computer screen it was too blurry to read.
Another minor complaint. The book only had a few checkpoints, so rather than showing actual progress, it would say I was 50% done for several pages, then suddenly switch to 58%.
Lots of excellent information, I just wish it was easier to parse.
Lots of really good information in this zine, and I highly recommend checking it out! That said, there were several issues trying to read it on Kindle.
Reading it on my phone, the words were too small and I had to zoom in, often requiring me to move the focus about the page in order to continue reading. Then once I was done, I had to X out of the page before going to the next.
I tried to pull it up on my computer so the words would be larger, but on the computer screen it was too blurry to read.
Another minor complaint. The book only had a few checkpoints, so rather than showing actual progress, it would say I was 50% done for several pages, then suddenly switch to 58%.
Lots of excellent information, I just wish it was easier to parse.
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February 12, 20211) I learned a new way to fuck my girlfriend! (muffing)
2) The "Soft Bodies" essay is really great.
... Er, I feel like that came across like those are the only two good things about this zine, whereas really they were the two best parts of the zine (for me). (Okay, the actual best part was maybe how much my partner loved this zine. Best $10 they'd ever spent? Maybe 😂)
My partner bought the PDF and shared it with me, but after I read it I bought my own copy. I'm bummed that there hasn't been a follow-up issue in the decade-plus since this issue came out :(
2) The "Soft Bodies" essay is really great.
... Er, I feel like that came across like those are the only two good things about this zine, whereas really they were the two best parts of the zine (for me). (Okay, the actual best part was maybe how much my partner loved this zine. Best $10 they'd ever spent? Maybe 😂)
My partner bought the PDF and shared it with me, but after I read it I bought my own copy. I'm bummed that there hasn't been a follow-up issue in the decade-plus since this issue came out :(
June 26, 2016
Bodies are much more magical and sci-fi than I ever thought. Of course its a trans woman who figures it out.
This is a beautiful loving zine, and so much more than a "How to Sex" zine, it's full of essays on Bellwether's experiences as a woman trying to have adult relationships, and the beautiful and sad things she experiences because of her lovers. I really enjoyed this zine and I am looking forward to the next issue.
This is a beautiful loving zine, and so much more than a "How to Sex" zine, it's full of essays on Bellwether's experiences as a woman trying to have adult relationships, and the beautiful and sad things she experiences because of her lovers. I really enjoyed this zine and I am looking forward to the next issue.
April 15, 2022
Now I want a “Fucking Enbies”. Every time I read a candid, sexually explicit text by a trans author I feel like rejoicing.
Interesting things:
- inguinal canals, muffing and tucking
- Sex with soft penises (and a general societal need to make things hard, and not celebrating the soft)
- Give agency to your body - it can need and demand things
- Doubting your own experiences makes sense when you have no frame of reference for that experience bc it’s non-normative and not talked about
Interesting things:
- inguinal canals, muffing and tucking
- Sex with soft penises (and a general societal need to make things hard, and not celebrating the soft)
- Give agency to your body - it can need and demand things
- Doubting your own experiences makes sense when you have no frame of reference for that experience bc it’s non-normative and not talked about
February 6, 2024
INFORMATIVE! Blunt and clear and weirdly reassuring even though I am not a trans woman nor was I planning to sleep with a trans woman any time soon. Texted my friend "Anyways. Something about this random zine writer saying "fucking is all about having a good time with someone else. Otherwise what's the point" is resetting my brain a little" and like. Yeah! I know this isn't for everyone but like. Recognizably important
December 18, 2020
This is the beginning of our much needed trans women's Our Bodies Our Selves moment. The lessons specifically on muffing have transformed my sexual experiences for the better. Thank you for starting the conversation, Mira!
I will be sure to loan this to any new partners. It will be required reading, and there will be an oral exam.
I will be sure to loan this to any new partners. It will be required reading, and there will be an oral exam.
March 6, 2024
Legendary and groundbreaking. Also much more well-written and illustrated than you’re probably expecting, and just as informative as it needs to be. Only four stars because the other things I want addressed were supposed to come in the later issues that never happened. Rest in peace to Mira Bellwether. May her dream one day come true and issue #1 be released!!!
July 29, 2014
A NECESSARY and IMPORTANT book that I want ALL queers to read and should be in every radical and feminist and sex-positive bookstore! The more we know and understand and physically LOVE the bodies around us, the more we can all be connected as an LGBTQIA community.
December 18, 2018
This book is sexually explicit, as one might expect, but it is an incredibly useful reference for trans women and their partners on the many ways that transfeminine sexuality can work.
March 13, 2020
If you identify as queer, or love and respect women, or you are dating a Trans woman, or someone you know is--do yourself a service and read this book!!
April 15, 2021
im gay now......
April 20, 2021
A must-read for trans women and the humans who fuck them. Also, issue 0 is highly recommended for anyone who has sex where a penis is involved, because the "soft bodies" essay is excellent.
December 29, 2022
Rest in Peace Mira Bellwether. Anyone who writes about sex the way she did is a hero in my book.
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