Welcome to my re-read of the magical series “Harry Potter”. 🤓⚡️My journey this time around is a hybrid of reading the books, listening to a fun (adult) podcast and watching the movies. ❤️📚🎧🎬
⚠️Spoiler Warning: stop reading now, if you’re unfamiliar with the world of Hogwarts.⚠️
Personal Opinion Note: I’m terribly sad for you, if you’ve never read the books (or at least watched the movies). 😉📚🎧🎬
I’ll be updating this review as I progress through the series, so, be prepared for a long review. 🤗
📚Chapter 1: The Worst Birthdays
The Dursley’s have not changed. They’re still terrible muggles. Harry has not heard from anyone all summer. Uncle Vernon’s boss is coming to dinner and Harry’s been told to stay upstairs and not make a sound.
📚Chapter 2: Dobby’s Warning
Dobby the house elf really makes a bad first impression. Dobby had been taking all of Harry’s letters all summer, in hopes that Harry wouldn’t want to go back to school. Dobby does a spell and Harry gets the blame, soon after a letter arrives from the ministry of magic giving Harry a warning. Uncle Vernon puts bars on his window and says he can’t go back to Hogwarts.
📚Chapter 3: The Burrow
The Weasley’s really are the best! Them showing up in a flying car to rescue Harry is the best scene ever. Harry tells them about Dobby. Fred and George tell him house elves usually belong to rich wizard families. Harry believes Malfoy sent him. Ron is embarrassed by his home, but Harry thinks it’s brilliant.
📚Chapter 4: At Flourish and Blotts
I love that Hagrid breaks up a fight between two grown wizards! Harry and the Weasley’s head to Diagon Alley to gather school supplies. Gilderoy Lockhart is signing books and announces that he’ll be the new defense against the dark arts teacher. Mr. Weasley gets into a rumble with Mr. Malfoy.
📚Chapter 5: The Whomping Willow
That’s one mean tree!! Harry and Ron are unable to get through platform 9 3/4. So, they fly the car, along the train, to Hogwarts. But the crash the car into a very old and angry tree when they arrive. Ron breaks his wand.
🎧Podcast: Binge Mode: Chapters 1-5
***Warning: podcast has adult content***
Ummm… did you read that warning? If you’re easily offended by things like: swears, wanking jokes, milf’s, etc. etc. do not listen to this podcast. To all my fellow heathens out there, this is not only entertaining- but also very spot on!
📚Chapter 6: Gilderoy Lockhart
Oooooo…. Weasley got a Howler!! Needless to say, Mrs. Weasley was none-to-pleased with the car disappearing from the station. Lockhart takes his moment to brag more, but only proves he has no idea what he’s doing. Ron’s wand is malfunctioning. Harry’s got a fan in a first year named Colin.
📚Chapter 7: Mudbloods and Murmurs
Poor Ron can’t catch a break with that wand. He tried to curse Malfoy for calling Hermione “mudblood” and it backfired, resulting in him puking slugs. Speaking of Malfoy, his father bought his way onto the Slytherin Quidditch team. Harry hears a chilling voice.
📚Chapter 8: The Deathday Party
Harry is nice to everyone, even ghosts. Nearly Headless Nick invites Harry to his deathday party. He foregoes the Halloween feast, to attend. Rotten food, cold room, screeching music… not exactly a warm blooded good time. While leaving the party, Harry heard the voice again. This time he follows it to find a message scrolled on a wall, about the chamber of secrets.
📚Chapter 9: The Writing on the Wall
Filch’s cat got frozen, aka petrified. Professor Binn’s explains the history of the chamber of secrets, which supposedly contains a Slytherin monster that would wipe out all non-pure-blood wizards. The trio speculate that Malfoy may be the heir of Slytherin.
📚Chapter 10: The Rogue Bludger
Freaking Lockhart… such a dumb dumb!! First Quidditch game against Slytherin and a bludger is targeting Harry. He end up with a broken arm, which Lockhart tries to fish, resulting in the removal of Harry’s bones. As he sits in the hospital, Harry overhears the Colin was petrified as well.
🎧Podcast: Binge Mode: Chapters 6-10
***Warning: podcast has adult content***
I love the why? why? why? We all think it and none of us know. It’s all very intriguing! Like Tom’s trophy still being displayed at Hogwarts… why?? Given who he is and what he’s done, you’d think that thing would be hidden or destroyed.
📚Chapter 11: The Dueling Club
Polyjuice Potion in Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom. Hermione’s working on the potion. The whole school has heard about Colin. Lockhart starts dueling club, to keep everyone safe. Harry and Malfoy are matched up. Malfoy congers a snake and Harry speaks parseltongue in front of everyone. Another student and ghost are petrified.
📚Chapter 12: The Polyjuice Potion
Harry’s called to Dumbledore’s office, where he meets Fawkes the pheonix. The trio takes the polyjuice potion, Harry/Ron become Crabbe/Goyle, pointlessly, as they discovered nothing. Hermione became a cat.
📚Chapter 13: The Very Secret Diary
Harry and Ron find a diary with TM Riddle on it. Ron remembers the name from a trophy. Harry discovers the diary writes back and allows him inside memories. He sees why Hagrid was expelled.
📚Chapter 14: Cornelius Fudge
Harry’s room was broken into and the diary stolen. Quidditch is cancelled and everyone is told the school is on lockdown. The Minister of Magic shows up to take Hagrid to Azkaban (wizard jail) and calls for Dumbledore to step down as head master.
🎧Podcast: Binge Mode: Chapters 11-14
***Warning: podcast has adult content***
It’s really funny how they point out things, like Ginny being upset, so Fred and George scare her… Dumbledore asking Harry point blank if he has anything to tell him and he chooses not to. Truth. Hurts.
📚Chapter 15: Aragog
Per Hagrid’s request, Harry and Ron follow spiders into the forest. They find Hagrid’s friend spider, Aragog, who is the size of a horse. The spider tells his family to eat them, but the old flying car rescued them in time.
📚Chapter 16: The Chamber of Secrets
Ginny is still acting strange. The boys visit petrified Hermione, to find a note in her frozen hand, which identifies the monster as a type of snake. They run to tell, but overhear that Ginny was taken. They go into the pipes to find her.
📚Chapter 17: The Heir of Slytherin
Harry find Ginny in the chamber, with a ghostly Tom Riddle nearby. Tom shares about Ginny and his diary and his identity… Voldemort. Dumbledore’s bird Fawkes appears, carrying the sorting hat. Harry uses a sword from the hat, to kill the snake, gets bit, uses the snake fang to destroy the diary, causing Tom to disappear.
📚Chapter 18: Dobby’s Reward
Harry talks to Dumbledore about Voldemort. Mr. Malfoy shows up with Dobby on his heals. Harry confronts him about slipping Riddles diary to Ginny. He slips a sock into it and chucks it to Mr. Malfoy. He unknowingly freed Dobby. Lockhart and his wiped memory are no longer an issue. All the petrified get woken up. Gryffindor wins the house cup.
🎧Podcast: Binge Mode: Chapters 15-18
***Warning: podcast has adult content***
They covered so much- but these last chapters covered a ton too! Main points: Why doesn’t Harry replace Ron’s wand for him? He has the money! But treats from the cart will have to do… lol…. Why does the school take so long to wake the petrified? Like those are the only Mandrakes in the world…. Dumbledore assures Harry he’s a true Gryffindor, because of his CHOICE to be in Gryffindor.
🎬Movie #2
I wish they had depicted the fist fight between Mr. Malfoy and Mr. Weasley in the movie. But alas, it was left out. But there was a lot still there, that I loved seeing come to life. Travel by floo powder…. the Mandrakes…. Harry going into the diary. I also love how Ron’s voice cracks all the time. It’s really great.
🎧Podcast: Binge Mode: Movie
***Warning: podcast has adult content***
Hedwig!! Poor Hedwig. She does need a bigger cage and boy, oh boy, she had a rough time. Sadly the movie does skip quite a bit. Our choices define us, not our blood- what a great message overall. Hogwarts!! The safest place in the world, lol, where Voldemort has attacked Harry, twice now. I love that they manage to sum up all the thoughts with humor.
Checking Chamber of Secrets off my list. Thanks for following along on my journey. Now… onto book 3! ❤️📚