Reclaiming Desire: 4 Keys to Finding Your Lost Libido

by Andrew Goldstein, Marianne Brandon

4 Keys to Finding Your Lost Libido Anyone who has stood in a supermarket checkout line has seen all the sexy headlines on women's magazines, touting exciting new ways for readers to drive their men wild in bed or to heighten their own sexual pleasure. These are tantalizing promises, to be sure. But they sorely miss the mark. The fact is, many women aren't interested in more sex or better sex. They aren't interested in sex at all. They used to be, of course. Over months or even years, their sexual desire all but disappeared. And they can't understand why. Through years of clinical practice, Andrew Goldstein, M.D., and Marianne Brandon, Ph.D., have worked with scores of clients who aren't satisfied with their sex drives. They've seen how women struggle to open up about this very personal and painful problem. And they've seen how it can erode women's self-esteem and strain intimate relationships. In Reclaiming Desire , Dr. Goldstein and Dr. Brandon present a self-care version of their highly effective holistic approach to treating low libido. Inside you'll
- An exclusive self-test to assess physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual health--the four cornerstones of a healthy sex drive - Essential information on how major life events like pregnancy, menopause, and divorce can affect a woman's sexual health - A range of practical measures, from conventional and herbal medicines to mind-body techniques and lifestyle strategies, that can help rekindle sexual desire - Personal stories that draw upon the real-life experiences of women who once struggled with low libido--and emerged with a greater understanding of their sexual selves Reclaiming Desire also offers a healthy dose of reassurance and encouragement as an antidote to all of the misconceptions about low libido. As you'll learn, a decline in sex drive doesn't automatically happen with age. And while hormones influence sexual desire and response, they don't determine a woman's sexual destiny. Just as important, low libido doesn't necessarily point to a problem in a woman's relationship with her partner. More than likely, she simply has lost touch with her sexual self. Unlike those magazine headlines, Reclaiming Desire will more than live up to its promise. With this book, you can reclaim your desire--and make your sex life better than ever.

Genres: Sexuality, Psychology, Nonfiction

336 pages, Hardcover

First published May 11, 2004

Reviews

[Gwen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I mainly wanted to read this book to see if the authors mentioned asexuality. I was happy to discover they mentioned it about three times, although not always in the best (or most in depth) way. I really like that the authors pointed out very early in the book that low libido is only a problem if the person who has the low libido thinks it's a problem, and that there are people out there who are happy with their low libido and it doesn't necessarily affect them (or their relationships) negatively.
Overall, I think there's some sound advice in here for anyone, regardless of libido status.
I will say that the book was a bit too pro-higher libido for my liking, however, it wasn't too overly done. I think there's a fine line when it comes to sexual activity and encouraging people to engage in sexual activity when they don't want it. The (sexual) needs of each person in a relationship are important (no one more than the other), so, I don't think it's necessarily healthy or always the best to meet the needs of the higher libido person at the expense of the lower libido one and, at some point, the difference in libido (or in sexuality) is just incompatible. I think the book would've been better if it addressed incompatibility (and possible separation) as a very real and legitimate option for relationships.
Also, the book could be a bit repetitive at times.

[Melissa McDonald]

Low libido is the most common sexual disorder in American women, affecting an estimated 22 to 43 percent of the female population. And, according to authors Goldstein (a gynecologist) and Brandon (a clinical psychologist), the problem is more complex than most therapists realize. "A decline in sexual desire seldom has a single cause," they argue. "The collection of factors that influences a woman�s sex drive is as unique as the woman herself." Drawing upon their experience at the Sexual Wellness Center in Annapolis, Maryland, an institution that they founded, the authors advocate a holistic treatment that addresses four spheres of a woman�s life: physical health, emotional resilience, intellectual fulfillment and spiritual contentment.