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Blizzard
Inside the house, a group of childhood friends gathered for a Christmas party. Outside, the blizzard began, a howling hell no human could survive. But what lurked in the storm was not human. It was a mutant thing with a ravenous appetite for human flesh--and an insatiable lust for hot, fresh blood.
- GenresHorror
358 pages, Mass Market Paperback
First published January 1, 1988
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
August 15, 2020
A blizzard of the bizarre! Christmas parties don't get any crazier than this one. It's bad enough that beasties from hell roam the Earth, trapping festive friends in their home, but then there's interpersonal drama inside that's just as hellish. Sex, violence, and more! Throw in some freaky time warp stuff and you end up with a shocker that only the '80s could produce.
I read a lot of obscure, out-of-print oddities but this one takes the cake, both in terms of most unusual and most awesome. The recipe perfectly blends humor and terror, beauty and grime. Characters are fully realized, outrageous and unforgettable. Even makes you think in the end. But don't think too hard or you'll have an aneurysm.
Not sure how difficult it is to find a copy these days, but absolutely hunt one down. Highly recommended!
I read a lot of obscure, out-of-print oddities but this one takes the cake, both in terms of most unusual and most awesome. The recipe perfectly blends humor and terror, beauty and grime. Characters are fully realized, outrageous and unforgettable. Even makes you think in the end. But don't think too hard or you'll have an aneurysm.
Not sure how difficult it is to find a copy these days, but absolutely hunt one down. Highly recommended!
May 5, 2021
It's Christmas Eve somewhere in Michigan, and as family and friends all gather for a party at Jordan and Jane's home, a huge blizzard is slowly invading the town. Interspersed throughout the chapters of the gathering -- which have all your normal bickering and buried secrets -- are short little segments depicting a nightmarish, devastated world of cannibalistic humanoid creatures. Thanks to a complex, super-sciency science project brought to the house by teen-wunderkind Circe, these two realities are about to meet.
It's a ridiculous setup, but it sure is a whole lot of fun. There was a point during the middle where I thought it was turning into a 1-star read, as once the shit hits the fan things get so over-the-top and out-of-control that it strained credulity even when taking into account this is a B-movie-style horror novel. But once I decided to sit back and just go with the insanity and craziness, it was pretty damn entertaining. Just know that these characters are all absurd caricatures, and (vaguely SPOILERY) turn into raving lunatics who go to extreme lengths for things like food within hours of the house losing power and falling under the attack of the creatures, even though they'd just had Christmas dinner. And it was hard not to be bothered by the fact that many of them decide to go around buck naked while it's supposedly freezing in the house due to the loss of heat (end vague SPOILER).
Still, it was mostly a blast to read, and the totally irrational behavior of the characters as soon as things go south was actually strangely fascinating. And the deep-seated hatred among the friends and family that comes to the surface during it all was interesting as well. It's not really all that scary as a whole, though there were a few scenes of terror that were very well done, including one in the first half where Jordan, while trying to find someone who went missing, enters a laundry shoot that, he's surprised to find, Freaky.
Recommended for fans of 80s horror, especially those that don't mind a little cheese on the side. Just leave your brain on vacation.
3.5 Stars
It's a ridiculous setup, but it sure is a whole lot of fun. There was a point during the middle where I thought it was turning into a 1-star read, as once the shit hits the fan things get so over-the-top and out-of-control that it strained credulity even when taking into account this is a B-movie-style horror novel. But once I decided to sit back and just go with the insanity and craziness, it was pretty damn entertaining. Just know that these characters are all absurd caricatures, and (vaguely SPOILERY) turn into raving lunatics who go to extreme lengths for things like food within hours of the house losing power and falling under the attack of the creatures, even though they'd just had Christmas dinner. And it was hard not to be bothered by the fact that many of them decide to go around buck naked while it's supposedly freezing in the house due to the loss of heat (end vague SPOILER).
Still, it was mostly a blast to read, and the totally irrational behavior of the characters as soon as things go south was actually strangely fascinating. And the deep-seated hatred among the friends and family that comes to the surface during it all was interesting as well. It's not really all that scary as a whole, though there were a few scenes of terror that were very well done, including one in the first half where Jordan, while trying to find someone who went missing, enters a laundry shoot that, he's surprised to find, Freaky.
Recommended for fans of 80s horror, especially those that don't mind a little cheese on the side. Just leave your brain on vacation.
3.5 Stars
January 4, 2025
Ever been to a party where you hated everyone there and wished you were either drunk or, better yet, at home in bed? If the answer is yes, then you'll despise spending Christmas in 1986 at the home of Mr. Jorey Scott. Jorey makes Clark Griswold seem like the luckiest guy on earth. Among his guests are his ice-witch of a wife, his wife's even more witchy sister, his wife's nymphomaniac best friend who can't stop trying to give Jorey a boner in front of his kids, and his wife's "uncle"--a pedophiliac used car salesman with Tourette's. For 100 pages you must endure the cringiest conversations you've ever heard among the most irritating gathering of Baby Boomers ever assembled, all with names like Linda, Ralph, Jim, Jennie, Jane, and Wilma. What is this, a Hanna-Barbera cartoon?
You'll smell the blended alchemy of Canoe and Estée Lauder with potpourri and burned instant potatoes. You'll be on the edge of your seat as Wilma and Jennie bicker over sliced turkey and sage dressing while Ralph leers at Jorey's 13-year-old daughter. You won't be able to tell if the author is making a caricature of a dysfunctional suburban family or if this is just how typically screwed up the Eighties were (I remember Christmas parties at my parents' house in 1986 not being much different).
You'll want to get the hell out of there before you've finished your first Black Russian, but you can't. A freak winter storm descends from nowhere, snowing everyone in, and there's some flesh-eating mutants prowling about outside. But that's the least of your problems. Now you're stuck with these obnoxious Flintstones and Jetsons.
I confess that this almost was a DNF, if it weren't for three factors.
The first is that once the lights go out on the party, things get wild. The characters are still annoying and do even stupider things, but if you come to Eighties horror for the depraved and the bizarre, this is far better than any present you hope to get this year. I got a faux leather belt. Extra long... :(
Second was that the author injected enough humor and pseudo-Shakespearean gobbledygook about the human condition being literally a part on a stage play that the novel became much more entertaining for its unholy marriage of Woody Allen and George Romero. Combined with a genuine talent for vivid descriptive powers, the author managed to transcend the immaturity of his own material.
Most importantly was the fact that I waited for years to find a decently priced copy online which ended up still being too expensive. I would like to propose a toast (as I tap my Waterford crystal) to Grady Hendrix! Thank you for introducing a new generation of fans to these paperbacks from hell so they could buy up all the remaining copies for the pretty covers and never actually read them because it would cut too much into their extreme horror marathon of Matt Shaw novels that they also don't really read but say they do so they seem edgy and desensitized. I'm not bitter, or anything--just saying!
But if this sounds like your cup of egg nog, then do seek out your own copy. I'll probably be reselling mine online for the bargain price of umpteen hundred dollars. The cover IS nice.
SCORE: 3 unwanted house guests out of 5. I could be talked into bumping it to 3.5, but bah, humbug!
WORD OF THE DAY: Supercilious
You'll smell the blended alchemy of Canoe and Estée Lauder with potpourri and burned instant potatoes. You'll be on the edge of your seat as Wilma and Jennie bicker over sliced turkey and sage dressing while Ralph leers at Jorey's 13-year-old daughter. You won't be able to tell if the author is making a caricature of a dysfunctional suburban family or if this is just how typically screwed up the Eighties were (I remember Christmas parties at my parents' house in 1986 not being much different).
You'll want to get the hell out of there before you've finished your first Black Russian, but you can't. A freak winter storm descends from nowhere, snowing everyone in, and there's some flesh-eating mutants prowling about outside. But that's the least of your problems. Now you're stuck with these obnoxious Flintstones and Jetsons.
I confess that this almost was a DNF, if it weren't for three factors.
The first is that once the lights go out on the party, things get wild. The characters are still annoying and do even stupider things, but if you come to Eighties horror for the depraved and the bizarre, this is far better than any present you hope to get this year. I got a faux leather belt. Extra long... :(
Second was that the author injected enough humor and pseudo-Shakespearean gobbledygook about the human condition being literally a part on a stage play that the novel became much more entertaining for its unholy marriage of Woody Allen and George Romero. Combined with a genuine talent for vivid descriptive powers, the author managed to transcend the immaturity of his own material.
Most importantly was the fact that I waited for years to find a decently priced copy online which ended up still being too expensive. I would like to propose a toast (as I tap my Waterford crystal) to Grady Hendrix! Thank you for introducing a new generation of fans to these paperbacks from hell so they could buy up all the remaining copies for the pretty covers and never actually read them because it would cut too much into their extreme horror marathon of Matt Shaw novels that they also don't really read but say they do so they seem edgy and desensitized. I'm not bitter, or anything--just saying!
But if this sounds like your cup of egg nog, then do seek out your own copy. I'll probably be reselling mine online for the bargain price of umpteen hundred dollars. The cover IS nice.
SCORE: 3 unwanted house guests out of 5. I could be talked into bumping it to 3.5, but bah, humbug!
WORD OF THE DAY: Supercilious
August 30, 2021
Jane and Jordan Scott are hosting their annual Christmas party. They have a home full of their relatives, childhood friends and their kids.
Later in the night, the Scott's daughter, Heather is injured. Jane's best friend, Linda and her husband, Leslie try to call the police, only to find the blizzard raging outside has knocked the phone lines down. They next try to drive to the police, to find not only their vehicle, but the vehicles of every single guest have disappeared. Leslie sets off on foot to a neighbor's house. At this point, outside, visibility is nearly zero, and inside, the lights go out.
Leslie returns hours later, babbling incoherently about 'things' out in the snow.
Shortly after, the living room window is busted, and standing in it are huge, hairy, taloned creatures - clearly not of this world. A group of them enter through the window, grab a guest and retreat into the tundra with him.
No one can understand what is happening. Why even though it's been hours, its still pitch black. Where the cars went. Why it's snowing multiple feet an hour. What the creatures are.
It turns out, Circe, Jordan's niece has been working on a very advanced and complicated science project, which she brought to the party. Left unsupervised, some of the younger children unwittingly tinkered with it...
"The machine has formed a kind of expanded force field that includes us and this house... And it has thrust us into another dimension."
Their only hope to return to the world they know, is if Circe can somehow fix her project.
------------------
So, I have kinda mixed feeling about this. No creature action whatsoever happened until halfway through the book, but there was so much family/friend drama I really didn't even mind. This family was literally balls-to-the-wall crazy. The wife's nympho best friend jerked the wife's husband off at the dinner table. She gave him a bj in the kids room and the daughter watched. The father was creepily attracted to his (13 yr old) daughter. Then the daughter tried to get it on with her parents family friend. Wtf. 🥴 The world they were transported to somehow gave them the ability to transform their physical selves and one of the men literally turned into a woman. The people inside turned into The Lord of the Flies artic edition, turning on each other and banishing people to the tundra. It was just absolute lunacy. Did I have a good time reading it? Obviously. I mean, come on. All that stuff is great and entertaining. But for some reason I still felt like I didn't love this book.
Later in the night, the Scott's daughter, Heather is injured. Jane's best friend, Linda and her husband, Leslie try to call the police, only to find the blizzard raging outside has knocked the phone lines down. They next try to drive to the police, to find not only their vehicle, but the vehicles of every single guest have disappeared. Leslie sets off on foot to a neighbor's house. At this point, outside, visibility is nearly zero, and inside, the lights go out.
Leslie returns hours later, babbling incoherently about 'things' out in the snow.
Shortly after, the living room window is busted, and standing in it are huge, hairy, taloned creatures - clearly not of this world. A group of them enter through the window, grab a guest and retreat into the tundra with him.
No one can understand what is happening. Why even though it's been hours, its still pitch black. Where the cars went. Why it's snowing multiple feet an hour. What the creatures are.
It turns out, Circe, Jordan's niece has been working on a very advanced and complicated science project, which she brought to the party. Left unsupervised, some of the younger children unwittingly tinkered with it...
"The machine has formed a kind of expanded force field that includes us and this house... And it has thrust us into another dimension."
Their only hope to return to the world they know, is if Circe can somehow fix her project.
------------------
So, I have kinda mixed feeling about this. No creature action whatsoever happened until halfway through the book, but there was so much family/friend drama I really didn't even mind. This family was literally balls-to-the-wall crazy. The wife's nympho best friend jerked the wife's husband off at the dinner table. She gave him a bj in the kids room and the daughter watched. The father was creepily attracted to his (13 yr old) daughter. Then the daughter tried to get it on with her parents family friend. Wtf. 🥴 The world they were transported to somehow gave them the ability to transform their physical selves and one of the men literally turned into a woman. The people inside turned into The Lord of the Flies artic edition, turning on each other and banishing people to the tundra. It was just absolute lunacy. Did I have a good time reading it? Obviously. I mean, come on. All that stuff is great and entertaining. But for some reason I still felt like I didn't love this book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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October 4, 2024That's how you throw a Christmas party.
This wasn't what I was expecting entirely but it was very entertaining and the prose was smooth for the most part. Very 80s with some random, weird uncomfortable stuff thrown in.
I feel like it could have used a couple more revisions as the internal validity was off in a few places and certain character behaviors didn't always make sense.
Still, I'm glad I gave this random paperback from my local used bookstore a chance!
This wasn't what I was expecting entirely but it was very entertaining and the prose was smooth for the most part. Very 80s with some random, weird uncomfortable stuff thrown in.
I feel like it could have used a couple more revisions as the internal validity was off in a few places and certain character behaviors didn't always make sense.
Still, I'm glad I gave this random paperback from my local used bookstore a chance!
March 20, 2016
Very well written. Nice escape from reality. Keeps the pages turning.....
January 2, 2018
3.0 So this is sort of like Krampus meets something from the King world. Just so random with some things, but still a good read. Ending was not the best, just sort of poof, all done. Still an interesting read though.
September 17, 2019
If you don't mind bizarre and wacky this one is quite the ride. Fun read and batshit crazy.
January 16, 2022
3.5 stars
A surreal hellish wintry ride, like taking a toboggan off the edge of a cliff. Had no idea where this was going from one page to the next my jaw dropped and I laughed out loud numerous times. On the other hand the writing is objectively not great and the content gets problematic in multiple ways. This book would not be written today but it's the kind of gem I love uncovering when I read all these genre paperbacks.
A surreal hellish wintry ride, like taking a toboggan off the edge of a cliff. Had no idea where this was going from one page to the next my jaw dropped and I laughed out loud numerous times. On the other hand the writing is objectively not great and the content gets problematic in multiple ways. This book would not be written today but it's the kind of gem I love uncovering when I read all these genre paperbacks.
January 26, 2020
A group of people at a reunion get trapped during a blizzard with creatures in the snow. Tons of incest and pornographic depravity for the 1st 200 pages, with weird chapter breaks describing the monsters outside. Poorly written and putrid.
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April 18, 2025what in the world did I just read
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews