Eros Unredeemed

by Dieter Duhm

In a direct and committed language Dieter Duhm describes the state of love in our culture today. He places the unsolved issues of jealousy, free love, faithfulness, longing, impotence, morals etc. at the center of the question of true non-violence and peace. From the experience of free love he develops new perspectives for a new way of living, where love between two people no longer excludes free love. He describes the philosophical and social basis for a culture in which jealousy is no longer a natural law, where sexual desires no longer have to be suppressed and where faithfulness between two lovers no longer breaks down because of a too narrow vision of love. "Knowing love" is the term he uses for the process of developing a culture without sexual re- pression, fear and violence.

184 pages, Paperback

First published June 27, 2010

Reviews

[Gary Lyndaker · Rating 4 out of 5]

An Arguement for the Power of Love, Including Sensual Love as a Healing Power for Individuals and the Human Race


The book is long and not an easy read. I'm also skeptical of his perspective, wondering how much of his argument is based on his own preference for free sexuality.

But, Duhm strongly and accurately criticizes our modern Western cultural fear of sexuality. He argues that since the end of nomadic human societies, the control/ownership of women and sexual relationships has been contorted into a system that is unhealthy for humans and has led to the aggressiveness and greed if modern civilization.

He builds an argument that the unleashed power of love, including sensual love, would change the heart of humanity and the fate of our species.

I do not agree with many individual statements and some arguments, but the overall conclusion may be closer to true than most of us would admit.

What if our relationships were built on the foundation of trust, sharing, and emotional and sexual intimacy, freed from the cultural fear, guilt, jealousy, and anger that we accept as a given in human nature?

[Cretaceo · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dieter Duhm kritisiert in "Der Unerlöste Eros" vor allem Monogamie, die daraus entstehende Eifersucht und wie ein einziges Beziehungsmodell nicht zu allen Menschen der Welt passen kann. In das scheinbar einzige System gedrängt resultiert daraus Gewalt, Impotenz, verlorene Leidenschaft und vor allem Unglück. Als Lösungsvorschlag empfiehlt er die freie Liebe, welche letztendlich die wirkliche Liebe und den Frieden auslösen würde.
Wichtige Themen wie Verlangen, Moral, Eifersucht, Beziehung, Liebe, Freiheit und viele weitere werden im Buch behandelt und analysiert, halten sich jedoch stets in einem heteronormativen Verhältnis, die strenge Binarität der Geschlechter verzeiht das Erscheinungsjahr des Werkes noch, die fehlende Inklusion anderer Sexualitäten jedoch nicht.
Ich stimme nicht mit allen Behauptungen und Vorschlägen überein, aber das Buch als Gesamtheit ist eine Erinnerung daran, dass vieles in unserem System kein Naturgesetz ist sondern durch Routine und die Vorstellung von "Norm" konstruiert wurde und dadurch schlichtweg veränderbar ist und auch verändert werden muss.

[Clivemichael · Rating 2 out of 5]

Either the translation is poor or...the writing is. The ideas are fascinating and the vision positive. It is a little dated; only once did he mention homosexuality and no reference to transgender or any cultural differences beyond a western european perspective. Repetitive and tedious. Idealistic, needs rewriting and a serious edit to make it palatable for contemporary readers.

[Malia Matteson · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are some worthy and radical ideas here, and I have great respect for Duhm and his efforts to create a new model for human community based on equity, honesty, and openness about love and sexuality. However, there are some, old, creaky ideas in this book, some of which I reject utterly, such as certainty about "what a woman wants" and a binary view of gender. Perhaps Duhm is simply a product of his time (as we all are to some extent) and it is up to younger folk to take the gems here and leave the rest behind. Also, either the translation of this book is awkward, or Duhm is not a very graceful writer.

[Monika Berghoff]

Dieses Buch ist ein ebenso tiefgründiges wie humorvolles Weisheitsbuch zu vielen Fragen rund um Liebe, Partnerschaft, Sexualität, Eifersucht, Familie... Es ist ein Buch, das uns die Augen öffnet, mit welchem Stoff und welcher Kraft wir es eigentlich zu tun bekommen, wenn wir uns verlieben, wenn wir einen anderen Menschen begehren, wenn wir der Liebe Dauer geben wollen. Der Autor hat sich wie kein zweiter diesem Bereich mit Herz, Seele und Verstand zugewandt und den Versuch gestartet, das, was falls überhaupt bisher nur zu zweit, privat, hinter verschlossenen Türen kommuniziert wird, ans Licht zu bringen. Das Buch ist ein Beitrag dafür, die Knoten aufzulösen, die wir alle aus unseren Zweierbeziehungen her kennen. Es stellt unsere persönlichen Probleme in einen öffentlichen, politischen Zusammenhang. Je länger man sich einliest, umso merkwürdiger kommt es einem vor, dass diese so wichtige Themen im Leben aller Menschen so lange verschwiegen werden kann.
"Der unerlöste Eros" ist eines der wichtigsten Bücher unserer Zeit.

[Monika Berghoff · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book for all those who want to learn more about sexuality, love and partnership, about how to liberate oneself from fear and mistrust and create sustainable relationships. It is a deep and truthful book, it never ends to read it. You will always find different sentences which touch your soul.

What a relief that the author places these private issues of love and sexuality into a "political" frame, into the frame of the whole society. I am thankful that I could learn the public relevance of what I called before my "personal problem".

A must read for all who want to manifest love!

[Steve · Rating 4 out of 5]

[loaned to Antonio]

[Sheryl Cox · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent. It would behoove everyone to read this book with an open heart and mind. Were the ideas in this book implemented world wide, we would have peace (IMHO). HIGHLY recommended to read.