Fathermucker

by Greg Olear

"...a whip-smart, hilarious, and deeply moving meditation
on fatherhood and marriage."

--Jonathan Evison, author of West of Here and All About Lulu


"In vivid Crayola yellow, Olear brilliantly highlights the bliss and pathos, fear, loathing and lusting of 21st century parenthood. Yet beneath the sippy cups, crumpled Happy Meal bags, and Mom Jeans intertwined with another dad's sweatpants on the floor of this runaway minivan of a novel lies much more. FATHERMUCKER is nothing less than a moving and sneakily profound meditation on what it means to exist in these absurd and troubling times."

-- James P. Othmer, author of The Futurist and Holy Water


"..a book you can't wait for your friends to read, too -- an exhilarating and fearless celebration of life's highs, lows, and all the glorious in-betweens."

-- Maria Semple, author of This One Is Mine


" Fathermucker is a staggering achievement. A reflection on love, marriage and parenthood,
so astoundingly honest, laugh-out-loud funny, and genuine, it will break your heart."
  
-- Robin Antalek author of The Summer We Fell Apart


"I LOVE this book. Packed with fantastically spot-on parenting details, and so funny, I kept
reading it out loud to everyone around me (Yes, even the kids. Let's hope they don't remember)."

--  Lenore Skenazy, author of the book and blog Free Range Kids


"With candor and wit, Greg Olear takes the reader to the most uncomfortable truths
of marriage and parenthood--and yet Fathermucker oozes with vulnerability and love.
I burst into tears several times while reading this novel, and was beyond moved by the
anguished acceptance of young Roland's autism. Compassionate, insightful, and
laugh-out-loud funny."

-- Susan Henderson, author of Up from the Blue

"Funny, wise, sexy...this claustrophobic vision of contemporary parenting hits home."

-- Thelma Adams, author of Playdate

"Only a writer with the verve, daring and great talent of Greg Olear could pull off a novel
that deals with sippy cups, masturbation, autism spectrum disorder, affairs, and playdates
all at once. Fathermucker is delightfully unexpected, wholly original, and a joy to read."

-- Jessica Anya Blau, author of The Summer of Naked Swim Parties
and Drinking Closer to Home

Genres: Fiction, Humor, Book Club, Parenting, Marriage, Contemporary, Family

312 pages, Paperback

First published October 1, 2011

About the author

New book Dirty Rubles: An Introduction to Trump/Russia is a primer on the greatest political scandal in US history.

"If ignorance is your bliss, Dirty Rubles isn't for you. Greg Olear deliciously tears down that barrier Trump has erected between the truth and the American people.
—Cheri Jacobus, USA Today columnist, political pundit and Trump target

“While Donald Trump represented the greatest threat to the United States since the Civil War, the US Media abdicated its duty to tell the American people the truth. Luckily, skilled writers and patriots like Greg Olear stepped into the fray, keeping readers rapt as he helped condense complex conspiracy into lucid narrative. Dirty Rubles is a long-form version of that lucidity, a cogent book that will catch people up to speed as they realize the story of the century was kept from them. To help America get back on track, read this book and share its insights with family and friends.”
—Eric Garland, strategic analyst, author of Future Inc: How Businesses Can Anticipate and Profit from What’s NEXT and How to Predict the Future and Win.

Author of the novels Fathermucker and Totally Killer.

Founding editor, The Weeklings.

Reviews

[Twobusy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wanted to like this. I really, really wanted to like this. The concept sounded terrific: a SAHD in an upper-middle class enclave in upstate NY is told, during the course of a playdate, that there is suspicion his wife is having an affair. The idea is pure gold — a setting and a cast of characters impossibly ripe for comedy, plus an opportunity to add some emotional depth via the very troubling idea of a beloved wife (in an imperfect marriage) who may be quietly shattering our protagonist's heart.

Unfortunately... the execution fell far short of my expectations. Let me be clear: Olear can write — he knows how to craft language and put together an interesting story. And he certainly does a credible job of recreating the vast wilderness of SAHM/D life in the 'burbs. But in terms of really delivering on either the comedic or tragic implications of the story... it fails.

Problem 1: it's not funny. At all. And the fact that Olear clearly has the ideas and chops to deliver on a strong comic premise - and yet, consistently, fails to do so - became an ongoing source of frustration for me as I went through the book. I'll put it this way: a full-length comic novel that makes you smile and/or laugh a grand total of once? Is not a very successful comic novel.

Problem 2: it offers multiple opportunities to broaden into really emotionally resonant territory, both as a function of exploring the wife's possible infidelity and in exploring the emotional impact of having a child on the autism spectrum (Asperger's, in this case) on a marriage. And yet, every time it starts moving in that direction... Olear instead veers into a machine-gun spatter of pages-long paragraphs listing people who attended a playdate and how they interact with and/or screw around with each other (or some other, similar tactic). It's as if he's hoping that if he dances realrealrealfast, no one will notice that he's not ready or willing to write with anything approaching real emotion.

All of which leads me to this conclusion: I've read far, far worse books this year... but none that made me feel more frustrated or actively angry for not being better.

(Disclosure: I was sent this book by the very kind people at Fathermucker's publishing house, whose name I can't think of right now. Thanks and sorry — I really wanted to enjoy this a lot more than I did.)

[Jackie · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Fatherhood is fear. Fatherhood is disappointment. Fatherhood is anger and envy and lust. And the surest guarantee of fatherly success is a Spock-like mastery of those base emotions. Mister Spock, not Doctor."

But that's not Josh, who is having a bad week. He is (was?) a screenwriter with writers' block, a stay at home dad (SAHD) with his son who has Asperger's and his precocious drill sergeant of a toddler daughter. He's also on his own because his wife is away on business for the week. He's pitching a freelance interview for a parenting magazine with a famous punk-rock idle, handling his son's total meltdown in a pumpkin patch and trying get rid of the mice in his house. Then things got a whole lot worse--one of the women at his daughter's group playdate suggests that Josh's wife is having an affair. His creative and sleep-deprived screenwriter's imagination takes hold of him, and strange things begin to happen.

This book is laugh outloud funny at times, and other times very intimate, focusing on the loneliness and frustration of parenting two children and trying to keep a marriage alive. It's a portrait of a suburban outsider trying to follow the complicated rules of the status quo, a man desperately loving his family while desperately hating his circumstances. Olear's voice is clear, snarky, jaded, hilarious, genuine and it propels the story along nicely.

[Manuel · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book is not aging well. There are too many name dropping and reference to the late 2000's pop culture. Interestingly, Josh is a Netflix subscriber but I didn't realize immediately this was about the old DVD-by-mail renting model. Time flies...

[Debbie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I'm probably not the target audience for this book, as I'm not a parent, have no interest in having kids and don't have any interest in reading about frazzled, First-World parents and how much their kids are driving them nuts (even though the dad has the luxury of being a stay-at-home dad, but still has to rely on McDonald's to feed himself and his kids, which is probably why the character's daughter seems to be having a lot of gastric distress and his Asperger son experiences some major emotional meltdowns). But it was on a recommended reads list of an author I like and I was desperate to try a new voice, so I read it. Big mistake. I probably shouldn't go any further, especially since I really loathed everything about this book and questioned how it even got published. I'll just leave it there.

[Sean Beaudoin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny and a little heartbreaking, sexy and more than a little subversive, insightful and allusive—not adjectives you’d necessarily think would describe a novel about 24 hours in the life of a harried stay-at-home dad. At least not based on my own occasional stay at home experience(s). But in Fathermucker, Greg Olear manages to squeeze all that and more into a single day, making even the most banal aspects of child-rearing (and, let's be honest, there's a lot of them) pretty damn entertaining. This is a book about parenting, about marriage, about gender dynamics, about pop culture—about what it means to be a good father, and a good husband.

Do we need any more of these types of books? I wouldn't have thought so, but the answer appears to be an emphatic yes.

The obvious antecedent is Little Children—as pointed out in the PW review, although they spell Tom Perrotta’s name wrong—but aside from the surface element of having stay-at-home dads as central characters, the two books have little in common. Perrotta’s main concern seemed to be telling an amusing but unabashedly ready-for-Meg Ryan story, while Olear is on the whole more ambitious, his subversion not just a product of afternoon adultery, but what treads deep (and frighteningly) in the water of the parental soul. By the end of the book, there’s not much about Josh Lansky we don’t know; his flaws are readily apparent. Olear channels Joyce more than he does Perrotta—although Fathermucker is way more fun-and much shorter-than Ulysses. At least I think it is, since I gave up on Ulysses halfway through and read Beyond The Valley of the Dolls instead.

At any rate, although there are elements of his debut novel, Totally Killer, that survive in this sophomore effort—the engaging first-person narrator, the rude obsession with pop culture, and the MacGuffin of a mystery—this is a different kind of work. It's a “Way We Live Now” sort of story that sharply elbows out a space in the queue to become the definitive stay-at-home dad novel.

[Matilda · Rating 2 out of 5]

My mom's book club was reading this, and my mom, not having time herself, enlisted me to act as a human SparkNotes, so, being the loyal daughter I am, I fulfilled my duty by reading it cover to cover and reporting back on the details. There were a few funny moments, but I felt like the kids' personalities could've been developed better; in fact, very little time was spent on anyone except the main character and his interior monologues. I'd recommend this to anyone who likes reading sassy things about fancypants parents and is looking for a light read; not my personal cup of tea, but an okay book if that's what you're interested in.

[Alison · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such a funny book. I loved all of the pop culture references and above all Josh's outlook on life--I could really relate to it. But above all I loved the pathos, the many little moments that were truly touching and emotional, but never corny. A fun and touching read.

[Laura Jean · Rating 4 out of 5]

What I truly enjoyed about this book was the playful way the author uses language. It was full of pop cultural and literary Easter eggs, that just made it so fun. The concept was also fun, especially since I have a friend who is a stay at home father and has met with discrimination.

Also, since I don't have children, I think it scared me off of having kids for....ever. Parents will probably find it even more funny than I did.

In addition, I love the way the author structured the book. All set within one 24 hour period. And then I really liked the chapter that dealt with Asperger's.

[Robert Warren · Rating 4 out of 5]

Josh Lansky, titular character of New Paltz resident Greg Olear’s rich Fathermucker, is primary caregiver to willful three-year-old Maude and brilliant-but-difficult five-year-old Roland, who has Asperger’s syndrome. In addition to wrestling with the pervasive feelings of fear and failure that plague all fathers, Josh struggles with virility issues, a stalled screenwriting career, and a troubled marriage to lapsed actress Stacy, now an IBM employee haunted by lost opportunities. This is business as usual, until a foxy mom at a morning playdate reveals her suspicion that breadwinner Stacy, now five days into a business trip in LA, is having an affair. Kids are everywhere, so Josh keeps it together while heartbreak, shame, anger and dread roil about his overcaffeinated guts. Before he can get details (with whom, for how long, etc.) the foxy mom hurries away, and he must wait for Stacy to return the next day. He ruminates and rages, all while wiping young bottoms, getting pulled over by a cop, salivating at eye candy, listening to Penthouse Forum-style playdate gossip (it happens), being judged for eating verboten junk food, receiving physical abuse from unruly children, and trying to find a decent song on the radio.

Almost everyone knows a stay-at-home dad—or SAHD, as Josh says. What most of you don’t know, and what Olear provides, is the passionate, devilish inner monologue often at odds with a SAHD’s (mostly) responsible exterior. Their friends view Josh and Stacy as a “great couple,” but inside, Josh is a piece of work; even before he tortures himself with screenplay versions of his wife’s infidelity—schadenfreude at its best—he’s just this side of a car crash. His frequently hilarious, insecurity-and-id-fueled conscience is stoked and soothed by hyperconnectivity to pop culture; tormented by tabloid titillation, calmed by Tom Petty, rankled by Facebook, saved by Noggin. Most men who care for kids don’t want you to know this stuff, but Josh’s frankness strikes a refreshing, power chord of truth. His little rebellions against the crunchy hipster class of New Paltz are deeply satisfying to anyone ever frowned upon for a substandard car seat.

Olear provides a tantalizing rhythm between the raunch and roll of Josh’s “inside voice”—including an occasionally annoying fixation on detail—and what he actually does. The choices he makes more often than not reveal a deeply moving devotion to his family, an uncommon love burning constant under the worry and kvetching, all of which makes a cheating wife more compelling (and excruciating). One of the more striking chapters—Asperger’s: A Chronology—is fascinating and briskly informative; this multileveled story-within-a-story illuminates the Lansky family’s stressed situation while also delving into a history of the medical establishment checkered enough to make anyone turn punk. Just as Fathermucker, should be given out to all new parents (instead of, say, What to Expect When You’re Expecting or Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother) the Asperger’s chapter alone should be made into an educational pamphlet.

Olear’s writer chops don’t end there. In addition to Josh’s distinctive, relatable wit, the insertion of Dr. Seuss homages into a coarse, long-winded web of sexual intrigue amongst Josh and Stacy’s married friends is a bawdy, ballsy tour de force.

At one point Josh notes that twins at a playdate “couldn’t be more different. No two snowflakes and so forth. Parenthood would fill your heart with wonder if it weren’t so fucking exhausting.” He’s wrong, though; in Fathermucker, even exhaustion can’t keep the wonder away.

[Florinda · Rating 4 out of 5]

The suburbs of the Northeast have been fertile domestic-fiction territory for decades, but Greg Olear’'s view of that landscape in Fathermucker, his second novel, is thoroughly contemporary.

As many others have before them, Josh and Stacy Lansky left New York City for the Hudson Valley once they started a family, but the shape of that family is a little different. Having sold a screenplay that almost got produced a few years earlier, Josh has become a struggling work-at-home writer and stay-at-home dad to their two children, while Stacy brings in the steady income working in marketing at IBM. Their five-year-old son Roland is on “the spectrum,” and toddler daughter Maude is a handful in her own two-year-old way. At the end of a week of single parenting while Stacy is away on business, Josh is having a real two-star (out of five) day: there are mice in the walls of his house, there’s a preschool outing in the afternoon (during which he hopes to find an opportunity to pitch an interview to one of the other parents, a renowned punk-rock musician), he and Stacy keep getting each other’'s voicemails...and he’'s very distracted by a neighbor'’s suggestion that Stacy just might be cheating on him.

Plotwise, this is clearly not new territory, but the framing is. The last few decades have made us increasingly conscious that parenting is a job. In some progressive circles, that job'’s more likely to be viewed as an intensely child-focused full-time vocation, and one that doesn't’ exclusively call mothers. Having said that, there aren'’t many at-home dads at the playgroup and on preschool field trips in the Lanskys'’ circle, and even fewer breadwinner moms. And having said THAT, the novel'’s parent-centric aspects sound like everyday conversations at school pickup (or posts on a parent blog), and that extends to the particulars of raising a special-needs child.

Much of Fathermucker sounds like everyday conversation, actually--everyday RIGHT NOW. I’'m torn over whether this is a strength or a weakness. Olear uses some very specific pop-cultural references and gives his characters dialogue that places them firmly in the 2010s. I appreciated that the novel was so current, but wonder if those details might cause it to be dated quickly--can a book be TOO contemporary? Then again, Fathermucker could just as easily turn out to be an artifact marking and elaborating on a particular point in our social history.

But regardless of how it holds up, it’'s a great read at the moment. The style is modern--Josh'’s internal monologue frequently goes stream-of-consciousness, and his speculations about Stacy’'s alleged infidelities are presented in screenplay form--and while some of the characters'’ specific concerns are very current, their larger ones are timeless. While it’'s built around some elements that are certainly ripe for satire, Fathermucker mostly avoids that; rather, I found it intelligent and earnest, without taking itself too seriously. The details are sharply observed, and the commentary is on them is often very funny. I was thoroughly engaged by this novel, and at times I thought it was brilliant.

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have mixed feelings about this book. Let's first get the most obvious out on the table. Olear is a gifted and observant writer. He takes the mundane of life and writes with aplomb. He articulates the thoughts many thoughts I have that I think might be too weird for anyone to know. But Greg Olear does. The language is exceedingly strong. Shocking, I know, given the title of the book so I really have only myself to blame. I don't mind a couple of "f" bombs in my reading. But the language he uses is far from the language I use or language I hear at work.

And I work at an alternative high school.

My students come close but then there is the added content. Again, it's the "f" word. Nearly everybody's doing it and not with their spouses. But it's the detail that pushed me just a little over the edge. Again, it's just not the kind of detail I go into with my friends when we talk girl talk. But herein lies the quandary.

The protagonist, Josh, is a stay-at-home dad. He hangs out with the cast of The Real Housewives which, I might add, are far too surgically perky and thrive on neurosis and drama for my own tastes. Not that that kind of thing isn't going on, but, ew.

So, back to Josh. He's a writer experiencing writer's block. He sold a screenplay and he's feeling rather smothered by the lack of testosterone laced interaction and the full hilt of parenthood. His wife, Stacy, is an actress who is working for IBM. They have two children who are both high maintenance. This is one day of Josh's life. Any mother or father who has spent any amount of time with their children will relate to Josh. It is clever, witty, and his thought processes and emotions mirror real parents.

That said, Josh is tangential. If you are a "give me the story" kind of a reader, this book might frustrate you. Olear is an incredibly gifted essayist, using Josh's thought processes to go off onto any subject. Some of them are really good while others left me feeling like I needed to take a shower.

But don't stop yet. Olear does an exceptional job at describing Asperger's Syndrome and different theories along with opinions not supported by scientific research but thoughts of a parent of a child with PDD. Really, it is very well written and gives the reader an accurate glimpse of what parenting a child with PDD might look like. If you have a child with PDD and are already suffering from PTSD, skip the descriptions but do read the history of Autism and the theories.

Ultimately, the book had a message that I really, really liked. For all the humor, the drama, and the crass language, I finished the book and was glad. I felt empowered.

So, sorry for the mixed review.

[Georgette · Rating 5 out of 5]

Josh Lansky is a stay-at-home dad(and struggling screenwriter) who's watching his two kids for a whole two days while his wife is on a business trip. He may go justifiably insane in her absence, however, after hearing from the mommy grapevine that his wife may be having an affair. Since their marriage has been lackluster as of late, Josh chooses to worry incessantly and in the process all sorts of absolutely hillarious scenarios plant themselves in his head, including a really great one involving the officer who pulls him over for speeding. Nothing is going to convince Josh that all is well, until his wife returns. In that time frame, however, you are treated to his sardonic thoughts on everything, from sex in public places to Oprah's strangehold on the American public. What a fantastically funny book, I will recommend it to everyone once it's released.

[Drew · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great second novel from Mr. Olear (albeit still stuffed overmuch with pop culture references.....) about modern fatherhood. I read this book and felt tied into the great continuum of males on this planet - from youth to adolescence to adulthood to fatherhood and beyond, there are certain truths that I think you just sort of... suddenly understand. I've been thinking about these things a lot recently (no worries, folks - even without this book, I'm quite happy waiting on the children thing for QUITE some time yet) and so this book hit me at the right time. Wonderful. Now, if we could just do something about the pop culture references......


More talk of fatherhood, pop culture references, and man: http://wp.me/pGVzJ-hu

[booksandcarbs · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. When Father-Mucker started, I was sighing a lot and prepared to be annoyed by a hipster-ish, liberal dad being snarky about parenting. And then, Olear won me over with this novel. The pop culture references for parents of young children were spot on. The novel's depictions of the daily life transactions of an at-home parent -- from play dates to bedtime routines to meals -- rang true to me. Through his main character, a stay-at-home dad whose name I forget because I finished this book two weeks ago, Olear shares reflections on parenting that are true, funny, sometimes heartbreaking, and mostly hopeful.

[Kathryn · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 stars seems high for such a light read, but I'm going to stick with it because this book actually did make me laugh out loud....or at least giggle. As a parent, I could relate to so many of the thoughts Josh had throughout his day dealing with raising his children, their habits and the God awful TV shows that we watched during the preschool years. While the book is funny - it also is touching as it shows life as a parent of an autistic child. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and will look for others written by Olear.

[Gina Paredes · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not so much

I don’t appreciate writing with uncommon vocabulary. Big words do not necessarily make you intelligent nor do they make for a good story. The average reader shouldn’t have to lookup words as they read. Therefore this story didn’t flow, its wasn’t easy to read and there were too many details which did not pertain to the actual story.

[Stacy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amazing how similar the POVs for stay at home parents, moms and dads alike. The story was well written and very funny at times, but the unique dad perspective was not all that unique...the first person narrative could've been anyone.

[Cherlynn Gagnon · Rating 1 out of 5]

this book was HORRIBLE... I think the writer had ADD... :(

[Brie · Rating 2 out of 5]

The concept is great - the life of a stay at home dad and how he manages the day to day stuff - but this book takes place
over just one day, which is kind of ironic since it took me almost 6 months to get through it. It's sooo long winded and I
have no patience for books that have ridiculously long chapters.

The writing is great (even if it did make me feel dumb at times), and I liked the main character. I guess I just wanted more. Or
I wanted to story to cover more than one day. There was so much excess talk about people in the main character's life that really didn't need to be part of the story because it distracted from the main story and why was it necessary if we were never
going to hear about these people again?

[Bradford D · Rating 3 out of 5]

Yuppie parents, special needs kids, Catholic slash Jewish protagonist, and a day in the life of Mr new-age Mom should be the ingredients for a complete vomit-fest as far as my tastes run. Yet I not only finished this book, I enjoyed it. The author doesn't take himself too seriously. The humor is mostly fresh and irreverent, and the story has a good message full of heart. If he writes about a subject more to my tastes, I can't wait to see the results.

[Kara · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Dana Kraus · Rating 3 out of 5]

Meh. I mean I finished it, but found it exhausting. The narrator was not that relatable and the story was too one-sided for me to be invested in the character.

[Emmylou M. · Rating 3 out of 5]

Funny but too wordy.

[Megan]

Gave it a shot since it set in the Hudson valley .... big nope

[Max Hanawalt · Rating 3 out of 5]

It’s a good exploration of emotion but it’s rather pointless otherwise.

[Mkb · Rating 3 out of 5]

There were things I both liked and didn't like about this book.
Didn't like: female characters are pretty much always described by their appearance/sex appeal. Two different women have breasts that our narrator suspects are "perky" in the first forty pages or so. At the very least get a different adjective. I guess it is part of the character, but it is just kind of yucky to have the stay at home dad speculating on the hotness of his mom friends at the play date. Also, book is published in 2011--were lower back tattoos (of scorpions no less) still considered hot then?

I'm thinking not.

Did like: The unvarnished depiction of chaotic life with small children. For a novel in which not much happens in a rather ordinary day, it was quite engaging. Also there is a shout out to Quebec beer, Fin du Monde. Thing I liked best: Using a ww1 poet's name as a verb referring to soldiers in the trenches being Seigfried Sassoon'd.

Actually, the author drops a lot of names (bands, beers, poets) to show the character is kind of cool. But I wonder if it really is there to show us that the author is cool? The fact that the narrator lives in the same town as the author and is also a writer makes one wonder about the blurry line between memoire and fiction. It says in the blurb that he is a creative writing teacher. I could imagine feeling uncomfortable about wondering which of the narrator's thoughts were also my teacher's thoughts if I were his student. I am now wandering off into a cloud of speculation. I am sure this is the case with any published author and his or her students.

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

From publisher/author
Read 9/20/11 - 9/28/11
4 Stars - Strongly Recommended
Pgs: 310

Ok. I'll admit it. When I hear about books that revolve around the events of one single day, I cringe. I do. But I have good reason to. Saturday bored my socks off with it's hum-drum, well-to-do, fancy pants poshness while Fight For Your Long Day - an enjoyable read, don't get me wrong - crammed way too much stuff into one day to make it believable.

So experience tells me that the day in the life of novels never seem to find that happy medium between keeping me entertained while also keeping things realistic. Is it an impossible literary feat? Is it the Holy Grail equivalent of storytelling?

Not to fear folks! Greg Olear has found the magic combination with his "day in the life of a stay-at-home-dad" dramedy Fathermucker. It's a book that quickly worms its way to your heart while fingering your funny bone!

Josh Lansky works hard... at keeping his two preschool aged kids dressed, fed, and free of closet monsters while his wife is away on a week long business trip. On the day before his wife is due back, while hanging out at his daughter's morning playdate, one of the mom's drop a bomb on him : "I don't know how to tell you this, so I'm just going to tell you... It's about Stacey... I think she's having an affair."

As soon as the words leave her mouth, his daughter bangs her head and begins to cry. In the chaos that ensues, Josh fails to find out more details and ends up leaving in a daze. The rest of the day is a whirlwind of worries and concerns - dealing with his emotions and confusion and paranoia and inability to get ahold of his wife. Is she truly cheating on him? With who? When? How long has it been going on? How could she do that to him?

As he struggles to contain his inner turmoil, he also has to remain attentive to his children's needs - especially his son, who has Asperger's and is still quite dependent on him and prone to sporadic outbursts. He's got to make it through a field trip at the preschool, a play-date at the park, dinner, and bedtime without suffering a nervous breakdown or caving into his insecurities...

Fathermucker is a mosaic of fatherhood. It's clearly filled to the brim with pieces of Greg's own experiences and it tenderly balances the good with the bad, the funny with the serious, the parental frustrations with the silliness of childhood. What is more hilarious than hearing your daughter tell you that she doesn't want to wear underwear to bed so she can air out her china? Or getting your kids to brush their teeth at bedtime by threatening them with the fear of developing "corn teeth"? Or promising to bring your son to Lowe's to buy him the newest edition of a home floorplan magazine if he behaves while you're out running errands? How could you make that stuff up?!

(I knew a guy who used to threaten his kids with "no milk at dinnertime" as a punishment for misbehaving! I'm not kidding!)

Oozing with pop culture goodness (it wouldn't be a Greg Olear novel without pop culture references), Greg not only addresses the old-fashioned stigma of SAHD's... he cleverly crumples the stigma into a ball, throws it into the air, and knocks it out of the park, giving the whole kit and kaboodle a new name and meaning!

Greg makes being a full time father cool again.

http://thenextbestbookblog.blogspot.c...

[Laura]

Josh Lansky learns at his daughter's play date that his wife is having an affair. This whispered rumor is passed along just before things fall apart and the playdate ends. So, Josh is stuck for the rest of the day wondering about the truth of the accusations. Fathermucker takes place over the course of that day.

What drives the book is the humor and also the thoughtful discussion of the role of the Stay At Home Dad (or SAHD, as Josh calls himself). I think there is a dearth of literature that intentionally explores the topic of masculinity, especially in a realistic and lighthearted matter, and Olear is filling that void. Take for example this passage, which comes directly after an exchange between Josh and his exterminator, Joe:

Joe is the sort of guy who feels the need to constantly project his manhood, especially around an obvious inferior like me. Usually I find his compulsion toward machismo amusing. But today I'm in no mood. He derides my fatherly duties, the implication being that I'm less of a man than he is, because his line of work is predicated on my primal fears...but it's more than that: he owns his own business, draws an income, makes a decent living -- and I don't. No matter how certain I am that stay-at-home fatherhood will benefit my children more than a few extra dollars in the back, no matter how evolved and twenty-first-century my thinking, the fact remains that masculinity -- and by extension virility -- is inextricably linked to money.

Josh is a screenwriter, whose screenplay (sold and vaulted away somewhere) has earned enough to buy a house in their upscale community. However, his relationship to his role is complex. What I like about Olear's portrayal is that he doesn't simply flip the roles, allowing Josh to become a stereotypical mommy, while his wife Stacy is "ball-busting working woman." Olear wants to bust both of those stereotypes. He also doesn't portray Josh as a man who is completely satisfied with his station, basking in his own enlightened nature. He struggles, with both the philosophical aspects of his life and with the everyday.

The only complaint that I have about the book is that it is sometimes a little too clever. Josh is kind of a cheeseball, and his jokes can be over-the-top. Although I certainly appreciate the book's humor, what I appreciate more is that it isn't a one-liner, but a complex look at a modern family. And it is funny. There are lots of great jokes and descriptions of earthy, yuppie parents, but at the heart Olear portrays a group of people just trying to navigate through the complexity of society and to have loving families (with an occasional unforgivably bad seed).

***I received this book from the publisher in exchange for my honest review.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Josh Lansky is a SAHD. Yep. That stands for Stay-At-Home-Dad, but lets just say that it isn't the only thing that acronym implies. Fathermucker is just the best kind of novel. It's a fictional story, but one that so many people will connect with! Mothers, fathers, people who aren't even parents but work with children. Each person will find their own hilarious piece of this Josh's story to fall in love with.

Greg Olear manages to squeeze every minute and mundane detail about a day in the life of a stay at home parent into this book. Being a person who is not yet married, and one who hasn't started a family yet, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to really immerse myself in Fathermucker. Wrong. Maybe it's my history of working with children, but I found myself cracking up during Josh Lansky's comments about his daily life. From debating on whether or not to shower or eat (there's never time for both), to his inner thoughts on the people around him, I fell in love with every aspect of his musings. Josh Lansky isn't perfect. His flaws are bared for all to see.

What really brought extra life to this story though is that Josh Lansky doesn't just have one child, he has two, and one of them has Asperger's Syndrome. I loved how much information about this syndrome was present in the book, and how honest Greg Olear was about how it changed the family dynamic. Josh Lansky has a fierce love for this children in this book. He's a father who, despite the exhaustion and slight mental breakdown, knows his kids inside and out. This is a book about family, about parenting, about marriage, and even about how thoughts sometimes (despite the fierce love) wander back to the time before children. As I said, brutally honest. Just also hilariously done.

The references to pop culture in Fathermucker are many, and Greg Olear's ability to create the real world around his characters are fantastic. Reading this book is like watching a movie. I know authors are always going for the "show don't tell" method when writing. Kudos to Olear! A day in the life of his character, Josh Lansky, is complete with Facebook, Noggin, McDonalds, and the all important Moka Java for those poor exhausted parents.

I'm rambling I know, and I'm not even sure I've done justice to this book. Here's what I'll wrap it up with. This is a hilarious book. It's honest, it's funny, it's a look into the life that most parents live but try not to share with the outside world. Yes, there is some language that people might be offended by, but it is a male point of view after all. I for one enjoyed it immensely, and hope that you will too!

[maman tu lis quoi ? · Rating 3 out of 5]

Un grand remerciement aux éditions Cherche Midi et au site NetGalley de m’avoir permise de lire ce roman.
Mon avis :
J’ai adorée, que ce soit le style d’écriture, l’humour, le réalisme et l’histoire. J’ai surtout beaucoup aimée le fait que le point de vue soit celui du père au foyer et non de la mère au foyer. Mais que ce soit le père ou la mère, les joies d’être parent au foyer avec tout ce que ça implique.
Ce fut un véritable plaisir et moment de détente, j’ai beaucoup rigolée car rare sont les romans qui décrive avec autant d’exactitude la vie (les tracas) de parent au foyer. Le réalisme de certaines scènes m’a énormément fait sourire. Les seuls points négatifs à ce roman sont les trop nombreux points de référence aux diverses séries et autres, et le bla bla autour des actualisations de statut Facebook qui pour moi n’apportent rien de plus à l’histoire à part un temps mort qui ne demande qu’à être sauté.
« Hier, par exemple, Roland est entré dans une colère noire parce que Maude refusait de lui laisser voir le caca qu’elle venait de faire »
« Oh mon dieu, m’exclamé-je. Comment tu as fait pour sortir ça de ton corps ? C’est le plus gros caca que j’aie jamais vu ! »
Nous allons traverser avec lui ses doutes, ses crises et son quotidien de papa au bord de la crise existentielle, car oui la vie de parent au foyer est dure, parfois psychologiquement épuisante et pourtant tellement d’amour, et surtout dans ce roman, on se rend bien compte qu’avec deux enfants, on n’a pas vraiment le temps de se pencher sur nos problèmes.
J’ai adorée passer ses 24h avec ce papa qui m’a tellement émue mais tellement fait rire.