5 Spiritual Solutions for Everyday Parenting Challenges

by Richard Eyre, Linda Eyre

"Every LDS parent should read this book."—Stephen R. Covey After more than three decades of experience working with parents worldwide, New York Times bestselling authors Richard and Linda Eyre have discovered that many of the parenting challenges LDS parents face are similar to those faced by parents everywhere. Many of the problems our kids have are similar to those experienced by kids throughout the world. But as Latterday Saints, our answers can be different. Our solutions can be spiritual. In this groundbreaking new book, the authors help LDS parents apply the unique insights of our eternal perspective to common parenting problems and concerns such as sibling rivalry, peer pressure, rebellion, selfishness, lack of motivation, and many more.
• Richard and Linda Eyre are nationally recognized parenting experts and the authors of numerous books, including Teaching Your Children Values.
• A unique, gospel-based approach to common parenting problems and concerns.
• Packed with examples of how parents can apply gospel perspectives in raising their children.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction, Religion, Lds, Self Help, Inspirational, Lds Non Fiction

208 pages, Hardcover

First published February 15, 2011

About the author

Writers, lecturers, and grassroots and media catalysts, Linda and Richard Eyre's mission statement: "Our vision is to FORTIFY FAMILIES by celebrating commitment, popularizing parenting, glorifying grandparenting, bolstering balance, and validating values." Their latest efforts in these directions are their new books (The Happy Family [St. Martins Press], Empty Nest Parenting [Bookcraft], and The Book of Nurturing [McGraw Hill]) and their regular appearances on The CBS Early Show. Richard's new book, The Three Deceivers: How our obsessions with ownership, control and independence are ruining the quality of our lives, will be published next year.

Richard is president of a management consulting company and a ranked senior tennis player. He was a "mission president" for his church in London, and a candidate for Governor of Utah.

Richard and Linda have nine children (one of every kind) and live in Washington, D.C. and Salt Lake City.

Reviews

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This the best book I have read in a long time!!! I do not generally read parenting books. I discovered many years ago that God is my best source for parenting help--so, when I don't know what to do about a particular issue, I pray and ask my Father in Heaven (the Father of my children's Spirits) for help and I study the holy scriptures. These are the best parenting sources. But, my mom bought me this book for my b-day, so I had to read it and I loved it.
This book is for LDS parents and it offers 5 simple spiritual solutions. They are things that immediately improved the Spirit in our home and in the past couple of days, have helped me to feel more joy in being with my children.
The first solution is to Remember your child's true identity--The Spirit children of our Father in Heaven. He loves them and knows them and how to parent them. We need to ask for help. We need to respect our children, just as we expect them to respect us.
This is a book that you can choose things that you feel you can implement in your family, but none of them are hard and yet all of them can strengthen our love and bring peace through Christ. I finished the book, but plan on going through it again and taking notes to implement more solutions.

[Janene · Rating 3 out of 5]

The five solutions were sound, I felt...

Remember your children's true identity
Remember God's parenting patterns
Remember your direct channel to the Father
Remember the church's "scaffolding"
Remember the Savior's power

Within this framework, they then give you some little tips, things to think about, and pieces of their own history along the parenting journey.

It was fine, a nice little Sunday read, but for some reason it comes with that feeling of GUILT. Not that they suggest you try and do everything included here, they state the opposite actually. Just seeing lots of great ideas that I know take some hard work and consistency to put into practice. Yes, they know a lot about parenting and have raised quite a successful crew, but what are the odds that I can do the same?

Enough about my issues, though. There is plenty of good insight here. If you are looking for some ideas, this is a definitely one to turn to. Some of the ideas I liked, others I thought were not my style. But it all certainly reminds you that from a spiritual standpoint, moms and dads have much to draw upon. Parenting really is different, easier(?), with the gospel perspective.

[Debbie Deerwester · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for parents seeking spiritual answers for raising a child/children. It can pretty much be summed up as: remember your child's identity (they are our spiritual siblings and come to earth already having their personalities from the pre-mortal life), remember God's parenting patterns (unconditional love, understanding agency), remember your direct channel to God (God knows your children better than you do, pray for help), remember the church's scaffolding (utilize resources), and remember the savior's power (use his spirit as a guide, priesthood to bless). There were lots of great ideas in this book. Actually too many to good ideas. I am just going to focus on one or two at a time and will have to come back to the book later as a reference.

[Brent Winslow · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the best parenting book I've read - the focus on spiritual solutions asks for a lot of work in understanding who your children really are (each brings an already formed personality and set of gifts and challenges, each will test us in countless ways and will contribute as much to our growth as we do to his or hers). There were some great recommendations for interactions with our children (e.g., DAT formula - when speaking with children, lower your decibels, respect their agency, and use a respectful tone; establish clear, simple rules with well announced consequences and rewards; express love frequently), being peaceful (leave tension at work via deep breathing, prayer/etc. on way home), among many other excellent suggestions. I'll be re-reading this with my wife and applying the suggestions.

[Liz Kazandzhy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read a lot of parenting books, and I liked reading about the spiritual side of parenting in this book. On one hand, I thought there were a lot of great insights and things to try at home. But on the other hand, I felt like a lot of the suggestions were beyond me. Like here they are talking about morning devotionals with their children, and here I am just trying to go a single day (hour?) without yelling at mine. So there was definitely a disconnect there.

That being said, I still think it's worth a read. Just know that if you feel a bit intimidated/guilty/disconnected while reading it, you're not alone.

[Becca · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found some really great insights. They gave some real-life tips to start adding to our family life. I will start to incorporate one at a time. If we were to try to do everything, it would be too overwhelming and it would be easy to quit. “By small and simple things...”

[Marie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book had some good ideas in it.

[Kim · Rating 3 out of 5]

I felt like I would like this book more than I did. It had good ideas. Just got too wordy for me at times.

[Kristy Q · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another wonderful book from the Eyres! This gave me so much to think about and I can’t wait to put into practice all that I have learned.

[Shalyce · Rating 4 out of 5]

My feelings are a little mixed on this book. Ultimately, I think the underlying theme is fabulous--that we can have help from our Heavenly Father in raising our children and that we can find gospel answers which will be much more successful then answers we will otherwise find. I really want to do better at incorporating these principles. I really liked the chapter on prayer and the points made on having a Christ centered life/family. I didn't necessarily agree with all their methods or think that all their ideas were super original, but again, the underlying message is outstanding and just serving as a reminder of how we can live our lives is well worth the read.

There were some things I found annoying, like how it changed which writer was speaking, so you were never really sure who was talking. I was also annoyed that they would so often reference their fabulous work "When we were in India, talking to a group of Muslims...." with no real point behind it. I also found it to be long winded at points, but if you can get through those parts and pick the points that might benefit you and your family or just remind you of why you are doing some of the things you are, then it is a great read.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing and the reviews are true... The Eyres will be speaking to the MBASA group soon and I thought I'd read up on their stuff. I must purchase this book once it's cheaper on Amazon. LOVED these LDS spiritual messages and am so glad I read now while my oldest is 5 and have time to instill in them these great ideas...

I like the reading style, flow of chapters
how they talk about Stewardship...how that needs to be emphasized and how parents do want to know everything vs. keep it private
paydays vs. allowance
valuesparenting/familyeconomy.com
active listening 76
break 83
Fear God, not your kids 96 (not over indulging, comparing etc.)
calmness is contagious 103
Sabath Day awards (part of FHE) loved this and will instigate this week! 125-126 focus on positive
prophet chaeffeur moments 132-134
Mother's Birthday Prayer for her children neat tradition 144
Monthly Testimony Meetings 152

[Keegan Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

I do not care for most parenting books. I would not recommend most of them. This one I loved. (But I should admit up front that I have become a Richard and Linda Eyre groupie, though I can say part of the reason is this very book.) Compared to other parenting books that try to tell you what to do, this book reinforces what you already know and explains why that's important as a parent. Then, they also give you practical suggestions for applying those principles to your life. Major basis in known truth (to those who are Latter-day Saints), mixed with practical ideas (but not absolute musts) for applying known truth to your life. How can you argue with that! (Though, humanly, I must admit that this couple and their family are a little bit hard to fathom because they seem a little too good to be true. So it's a bit intimidating, but still helpful.)

[Wendy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a wonderful book! It is definatly geared to LDS parents not just Chirstians in general. There is a lot of Church specific references. There are many things I will be taking from this book that I will be applying in our home. Family Laws, Family Testimony nights on Fast Sundays, and different aspects of prayer are all going to be applied.

The most important part of this book by far was the section about who our children really are. Coming to the realization that our children are who they are from before conception and trying to change their personalities is not only futile it is against Heavenly Father's plan. We are stewards to these souls and Heavenly Father wants us to teach them and support them but not change who they are. This has made my home so much more peaceful.

I will keep this book as a reference for the future.

[Lori · Rating 3 out of 5]

OK, but not my favorite book by these authors. Favorite tips I learned included the following:

-If you want more "spirit" in your home, pray more and pray harder for the "Spirit Of Peace". You can try other things like music, less TV, etc. but the sure way is through prayer.
-Take advantage of the Priesthood with Priesthood Blessings more often.
-If life is too busy for daily scripture "study" with the family, assign a child ahead of time each day to share a favorite scripture or one that has touched their lives.
-Don't fill your mind with so much "church stuff" like callings, The Word of Wisdom, Church History, etc. that you forget to focus on the center of it all, Jesus Christ.
-What Would Jesus Do? Teach this to your children.

[Slvrlinin]

What a fabulous book with true insight into the Christian family and grounding you and your children spiritually! It doesn't matter which Christian denomination you are (or if you aren't), this book applies and will give you some great real-world advice on ways to keep Christ central in your family and great ideas for parents everywhere struggling with the overwhelming responsibility of the best (and hardest) job on earth! I especially liked reading about the Eyre's personal experiences and their follow up with how things turned out. These truly are 5 basic principles that anyone can do easily and it was amazing how simple and straightforward their suggestions were! A great read for every Mom and Dad or soon-to-be parents!

[Jenny Fuller · Rating 5 out of 5]

My sister gave me this book and told me it was the most amazing parenting book she had ever read (and she has read a lot!). I have to agree with her. It is not a book that talks about the day to day dealing with personalities and issues but rather it helps us focus in on spiritual solutions that apply to all of us and our children, regardless of our personality. I loved how the whole concept behind the book is that our children truly aren't ours, they are God's, and he has entrusted them to us. It had some great ideas that I can't wait to implement and really got me focusing more on the things that I should be reflecting and focusing in on more often through the challenges of parenting. Very uplifting.

[Suzanna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked their take on a more spiritual look at parenting. There were lots of good ideas but then there were other things they shared and I thought "Good for them for being able to do that with their kids but it would NEVER work with my kids!" They don't suggest you try everything, but just make gradual or small changes. I did like the book overall and have thought about their suggestions as I've interacted with my kids since finishing it.

One thing annoyed me... the authors (a husband and wife team) shift writing between chapters or sections and it bothered me a bit that I could never tell who was speaking, the husband or wife. It was minor but was a bit frustrating.

[Alisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this based on a recommendation from my sister. It was really, really good. You can't just sit down and "read" this book to get all the ideas out of it. I especially liked the way they approached it, as insights, applications, and what you get out of each spiritual solution. They referenced several Web sites I want to check out, and had lots of great "little" idea applications I want to implement. Though I'm sure it's designed for parents of all ages, I found it probably most helpful for parents of kids living at home.

[Ruth · Rating 4 out of 5]

As I read this, I kept thinking that these two would do a great job of parenting my kids. I also felt a little intimidated as a mom. They had some wonderful thoughts. My only issue with these Deseret Book type of books is that the majority of what they write about are gospel principles and it seems slightly odd to be paying authors that write about gospel principles (even if they are really good which they are). They have some great ideas for parents and I am certainly going to go back and read over it.

[Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

The authors really helped me develop a better perspective for parenting my children that I have not had before. I have noticed a difference in my parenting since I have started reading the book. I took notes on some of the insights I thought were great and realized I have not been as stressed when it comes to parenting after reading my notes and remembering in difficult parenting moments what I read. I have read a couple of parenting books, but especially appreciated the views of the LDS parent authors of this book.

[Kelsey · Rating 5 out of 5]

So many things from this book have really stuck with me, particularly the bits about children being the greatest source of joy for parents. I'd forgotten about that...This book helped me reframe and kind of start over and realize how grumpy and mean and not fun I have been for a while. Kids are fun! Family life should be fun too.

I also loved all the thoughts about how to have a more spiritual home. Instead of making me feel there are too many things I'm not doing that I must do, it helped me realize that the only thing I need to do is focus our family on Christ.

[Kylene · Rating 3 out of 5]

If I could rate this 3 1/2 stars I would. I liked it, but not enough for the "really liked it" status. I think there are a lot of really good suggestions in this book for how to raise your children in a spiritual environment. I probably will try a few, some I didn't care for at all. The writing was good, but I was always confused as to who was talking...Bro or Sis Eyre. Anyway, enjoyable read. I probably won't read it cover to cover again, but more than likely I will pick it up as a reference.

[Tenille · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best Parenting book ever! I borrowed this book from work, so I could not mark it up, but I took 6 pages of notes! I think I will be getting this one for sure. So many things to help me to raise my children the way they should be..... and they totally make sense. Why haven't I been doing these all along? I think Our family will be a lot happier, and loving, and more spiritually minded soon!!

[Chandra · Rating 5 out of 5]

I underlined idea after idea in this book. In a nutshell, our children are really God's children and have lived long before they came to earth so they already have talents and traits and we are to help them remember those. God gave us agency and accountability so we should do the same for our children. Fear God, not your children. Gauge your childrens progress by interviews, testimonies and how they read the scriptures.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's hard for me to sum up what I thought of this book, let me just say that it will be on my nightstand for the next few years....at least. Such great ideas, such great application to real life, particularly my life. It is written for an LDS(Mormon) audience, but has so many great Spiritual/Christian principles that could be applied to any parents who have chosen to involve God and Christ in how they raise their children.

[Kim Garner · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found some great ideas within this book. I also loved this book because it really got me thinking, and then doing some of the strategies. I also was very reflective on my own parenting style and what habits I have developed that are good, and some improvements that we can make. It is a great read and I will return to it again and again for inspiration.

[Loni Spendlove · Rating 5 out of 5]

Feel the love! The Eyre's offer a support group for all latter-day saint parents hoping to build a strong family without dishing out the guilt. So many things I wish I had known as a younger parent but their encouragement gave me hope and renewed determination to remember I am a steward of Heavenly Fathers children, so He is there to help me.

[Jen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm not a huge Eyre fan in general, even though I have a lot of respect for them; actually, I'm not really a fan of parenting experts since I seem to have a deep-seated hatred/jealousy thing for all of them. But this book was a happy marriage of big picture principles and practical ideas making me, in turn, happy.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best parenting book I've ever read-especially focusing on LDS principles but good for any parent of any faith.

Chapters 1&2 applied especially to me now as I deal with young children, but I can 100% see how other chapters will help me as my kids grow. A definite book I'll always keep in my home.

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

Are there any more perfect parents then the Eyres? They are so inspirational for me, and I appreciated this book. Lots of great tips I want to incorporate into my family. I like how they teach a spirit of confidence and love in their parenting approach. It seems you can't argue with their track record either. All of their kids sound like great people. I'm a big fan!