The Milkman's on His Way

by David Rees

Growing up gay, beginning as a teenager, to realize what you are: that's when you start to suffer. Just when everyone else is becoming involved with the opposite sex, you're alone in having to hide your feelings. Impossible to talk to anybody. It's not something you want to blurt out to your parents, obviously. Or to your teachers, Or to the boy you fancy: He'd jeer at you or hit you.The only salvation is to find people like yourself. And that's a big step. A very big step.

Ewan Macrea is a 14 year old, living in the Enlish seaside town of Bude. A surfer, Ewan is having difficulties dealing with his disinterest in girls and his growing fascination with his best mate Leslie.

Genres: LGBT, Fiction, Gay, Queer, Romance, Coming Of Age, Young Adult

120 pages, Paperback

First published June 1, 1982

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name. See this thread for more information.

David Rees was born in London in 1936, but lived most of his adult life in Devon, where for many years he taught English Literature at Exeter University and at California State University, San Jose. In 1984, he took early retirement in order to write full-time. Author of forty-two books, he is best known for his children's novel The Exeter Blitz, which in 1978 was awarded the Carnegie Medal (UK), and The Milkman's On His Way, which, having survived much absurd controversy in Parliament, is now regarded as something of a gay classic. He also won The Other Award (UK) for his historical novel The Green Bough of Liberty. David Rees died in 1993.

Reviews

[David · Rating 4 out of 5]

An 1982 classic that would have been one of the books you hoped the gay community found when positive literature was rare. Ewan is a young English teen living on the coast. He realizes his friends are ramping up what 'base' they are getting to with girls, while he not only doesn't care, but realizes he much prefers his bf.

This is the story of Ewan going through his late teens as he discovers who he really is inside. It is a coming out tale that has a hopeful spin. By about half-way, this book was feeling very tame when suddenly some spicy scenes arrived. These encounters were simple, but very real. It was great to see Ewan finally getting to understand what made him happy.

I didn't want pity, patronage, or condemnation. I wanted to be told... what? That there was nothing wrong with me, I think.

There are homophobic people in this story (set in 1978) which was to be expected. But there was also some more very likeable queer characters introduced.

Parents don't hear you. Don't ever wonder who you really are: they assume you're a carbon copy of them, and if you actually show them that you aren't, they get very disturbed.

The writing is not complex, thus keeping this at 4*. But it is actually the straight-forwardness of this writing that makes this such an easy book to recommend.

When you're sure enough of yourself to realize that it doesn't matter if people know, you'll value the ones who accept it and not give a damn for the others who don't or won't or can't.

This book was published right before AIDS hit, so VD/Clap might get a reference, but sex was still just fun. It was nice to see how Ewan experimented with some promiscuity, but realized that he would be very content finding someone (like his very straight bf from his teen days) to settle down with.

The voyage of discovery is very pleasant.

I'm glad I bought a used copy of this classic.
Solid 4*

[Liam Ostermann · Rating 5 out of 5]

When this book came out in 1982 I failed to read it though I became aware of it later when it was part of the Conservative party's campaign against gay people and in particular the Gays the Word bookshop. So it is late in the day that I have come to it but I am so glad that I have - the book is delightful, the story powerful and deep, but most importantly honest and true. It should be read by young and old - because it is an excellently written book - but also to remind ourselves of how ridiculous, but also dangerous, prejudice, ignorance and bias can be. It is not hard to understand (not accept or sympathize with - be assured) why the bigots tried to prosecute this book - because our hero fancies boys and the book does not shrink from being clear and direct about his physical desires and actions. Somehow admitting that a 16 year old boy has sexual desires and fantasies for someone of the same sex and will act on them and that his straight best friend would be happy to accommodate to frightening and upsetting in the 1980's - thank god we have moved on. (Or have we? we have but I fear that we have moved on less, and the changes I would celebrate, are less secure than I would have thought. Added in July 2024.)

But even though it was written at a certain time - as I grew up in the 1970s it is clear this is the setting of the story - but like any good story by a good writer the fact that history and society has moved on does not make a story any less worth reading. After all just because we don't have barefoot urchin pickpockets in the streets of London doesn't stop us from reading and enjoying Oliver Twist.

Overall I can not stress how highly I recommend this book. I enjoyed it and and I still believe it has a message for readers today.

[Paul Manytravels · Rating 5 out of 5]

Adolescence changes everyone, and for most, it is a struggle. Ewan's adolescence brings the added challenge of accepting that he finds more excitement when thinking of other guys than he can muster when thinking about girls. A few tentative sexual experiments with his lifelong friend and neighbor, Leslie, convinces Ewan that he is homosexual.
Ewan struggles to acknowledge his sexuality and attempts to change it. In his era and within his family, being homosexual was considered an aberration, a perversion, and a mark of immorality; two men cannot enjoy sex together, and they certainly cannot love as others do. Ewan accepts these judgments until his encounters with older, more worldly homosexuals convinces him that he is not as evil as homosexuals are judged to be.
This book is extremely well written. It feels authentic and genuine, creating a character that readers will empathize with as they would their own families.
Ewan's parents never accepted his homosexuality, but the important thing is that Ewan accepted it and in accepting it, realized the fullness of life for himself.
Acceptance of homosexuality and of homosexuals has progressed a long way since this book was published, but the quality of the writing in this book allows it to remain a classic novel of growth and self-acceptance.
(Book read as an ebook that is archived at: Internet Archive. com

[Sebastian · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book at around 15 years old a similar age to the main character in the book. In those days finding a story about a gay teenager was unheard off.
I was also gay and suffered at the hands of bullies on a daily basis. People in those days stayed in the closet. The book helped me in those dark days, it told me of an other gay person suffering some of the turmoil I was going through at the time. The book gave me hope of life getting better. I have now just reread the book 36 years later for a bit of nostalgia. It took me right back to those days, and how much the book had helped me at the time.
I read recently David Rees had died of HIV/AIDS, I was sad hearing of his death, I was going to write to him and let him know how much his book helped me during a difficult part of my life.

[Vincent · Rating 4 out of 5]

Perhaps not the most eloquent of writing styles, but it covered a lot of important topics and the sheer bravery of the author in publishing his book in 1982 merits an extra star from me.

[Katie Hunter · Rating 5 out of 5]

Up there with my favourite of the year - made all the better by reading it in one go on the beach :)

[Henry · Rating 5 out of 5]

This sort of young adult coming out novel wouldn't normally be my sort of book as I'm a bit passed all that. However I came across this book purely by accident - and I was pleasantly surprised. It's not a long book so don't expect a lot of evenings reading by the fire. I read it in a day. The book however is very well written and although written for late teens the quality of observations and writing means that anyone could find something worthwhile to reflect on. The plot is simple enough. Ewan is 15 and realises that he is not as other boys. He lives in a very quiet little town in the South West of England where nothing much happens. Being a pre-internet age he is in no position to research about his predicament so has to try to come to terms with his situation in a vacuum. Making things worse is that he falls for his attractive best friend who rejects him - but not enough to cancel some `shamefaced fumblings' they have every so often. He hangs about the town after leaving school and meets a teacher on holiday from London. He has a brilliant week and meets some of the teachers friends who seem perfectly normal and happy with their sexuality - unfortunately the teacher isn't totally honest and hides his relationship in London for the duration of the holiday - leaving Ewan feeling even more rejected.
Getting nowhere in the town he tells his parents who, although not totally rejecting their only son, simply clam up and pretend the situation is temporary. He eventually leaves for London and the latter third of the book is about his first years there - the people he meets etc. Nothing of any drama - work, bedsits, pubs and clubs. The work doesn't do major drama and would appeal to most people because that's how most people live their lives. You do feel for Ewan -possibly because you can see a lot of yourself in him and his search. Buy it if you can find it.

[Stephen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ewan Macrae is an uncomplicated, 14 year-old English lad growing up in the seaside town of Bude. He and his mates love spending long days at the beach sunbathing and surfing, but lately his mates have been more interested than he in the girls that have joined their circle of friends.

Ewan, on the other hand, is more and more interested in Leslie, his best mate. And when alone in Ewan's room after a training run Leslie reaches into Ewans shorts. Ewan realizes that he might be gay and in love with his best mate.

Published in the early 80's, this story still feels contemporary and vital. It's the story of one man's coming of age and coming out, but the discoveries are universal.

This book has an everyman quality that I found compelling when I first read it which still holds true today.

[Kats · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ian McKellen called this “A gay classic” but I hadn’t heard of it until I stumbled across it at Topping’s in Bath last month when I was looking at the local authors shelf.

Set 70% in Bude and about 30% in Richmond & London, this is a coming-out and coming-of-age piece of auto-fiction that must have been reassuring and affirming for young, anxious gay men in the early 1980s when it was first published.

I’m definitely not in the target demographic readership but I enjoyed Ewan Macrae’s coming out story, particularly during PRIDE month. 🏳️‍🌈💖

3.5 stars

[J]

An enjoyable gay coming-of-age tale first published in 1982. We follow Ewan from his first sexual experiences (with his straight best friend) to his eventual coming out, falling out with his parents, and start of a new life in London with his boyfriend James. The sort of book that would have no doubt helped a lot of struggling gay teens in the '80s if they'd read it. There's nothing groundbreaking here, but a pleasant short read for those who (like me) enjoy this sort of thing.

[Gigi Rivera · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this, devoured it in two sittings. Love this queer coming and age. It’s not sad, but it’s not without real struggles. No horrible things happen to the characters, just the struggles of being queer in the 80s. Can’t wait to read more for Rees.

[Mario · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyed the book!

[Zak F · Rating 5 out of 5]

Has to be up there with one of my favourite books. The message is still so relevant in todays society. So beautifully written.

[Silvia Duque · Rating 4 out of 5]

“El futuro inmediato. Ya hacía tiempo que había dejado de pensar que vale la pena hacer planes. Nada dura para siempre” (p. 155)

[J · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found a copy of this book in a local antique shop, when I went to the counter I opened the book up so the middle age woman at the desk could just see the price and not the half naked picture of a man on the front cover. She closed the book and passed it to me, but I saw her eyes dart down on the cover and then on me. I knew she knew. I felt so much shame and felt so stupid to buy something so obviously gay themed. I left this book tucked away with all the other books I adopt from anywhere I find them and had no intention of really reading it. Maybe I was still living in the place where buying this book brought the satisfaction and not actually reading it. Tonight I did. I read it cover to cover in bed and only stopped to use the loo. It was like I was waiting for the answers to come to light. Following this character who was experiencing things that I’ve been currently experiencing was hypnotic. My own personal fears attached to my sexuality, and being vulnerable to reality’s cruelty that sometimes flairs up in that regard. I felt safe though. I feel seen, and is that not why books are brought into the world, and even more specifically, gay books. You don’t have to be alone. You just have to open that door you’ve been keeping shut. I feel like a step has been taken forward towards there. Thank you.

[Rosamund Taylor · Rating 3 out of 5]

Set in the very early 1980s, this book is more interesting as a curiosity than as a novel. It's one of the first (possibly the first) young adult novel to deal with a teenager realising that he is gay. Ewan grows up in Bude, in Cornwall, and is mainly interested in surfing, and comes to realise he doesn't feel the same way about girls as his friends do. The novel follows him through his late adolescence as he comes to terms with his sexuality, and discovers that what everyone is telling him is wrong -- it is possible for two men to love one another and to have a fulfilling life together. The book is remarkably frank when it comes to discussions of sex, and Rees' writing really shines here: he depicts sex as a healthy and joyful expression of intimacy, in a way that feels honest and refreshing. However, the book does feel very much of its time -- it's not concerned with exploring any aspect of Ewan's life other than his sexuality, and it often feels rushed and the prose can be clunky. I'm glad that it's been reprinted, though, and I'm sure it was a vital piece of work when it came out.

[Martyn · Rating 2 out of 5]

In it's favour it's short and easy to read, but that's about all that I can say in its favour. For me the biggest problem is that the early part of the book just doesn't ring true. It doesn't sound like a typical fifteen-year-old. His language and his thoughts are too advanced, especially for someone with his apparently very limited academic interests. In some ways it felt that as the book progressed Ewan got younger - became more immature and insecure the more he aged.

There wasn't much in the plot to commend it either. The gays don't come out of it looking particularly good. They are generally presented as kind and caring people - but none of them are stable or faithful. Gay relationships seem to be presented as being of a very temporal and shaky nature, based on either lust or convenience, shifting in whatever direction the wind blows and as fancy takes them - and that is accepted as being the natural way of things.

[Stella · Rating 3 out of 5]

Judging this book may feel a bit unfair, as the introduction makes it clear that the context in which it was written and published is central to its significance. In the early 1980s, when societal norms were far less accepting of the themes explored in this novel, its ability to normalize and represent these issues was groundbreaking. This historical importance casts a long shadow over the book, making it difficult to evaluate purely as a piece of contemporary literature.

Given the cultural and social climate of the time, the book's decision to present Ewan, the protagonist, as a relatively bland and unremarkable character seems deliberate. His milquetoast nature, coupled with a lack of deep personality or interiority, appears to serve a larger purpose: to make his story more accessible and relatable to a broad audience during a time when such narratives were often considered taboo. While his perpetual internal conflict is the heart of the story, it sometimes renders him a less-than-compelling figure. He often comes across as a "boring kid," with limited complexity or emotional depth.

That said, there are moments when Ewan’s character feels more nuanced, particularly in the sections where he works at the pool. These were my favorite parts of the book, as they showcased a more layered portrayal of Ewan. Here, we see him both as an enabler of cruelty and bullying and as someone deeply afraid of becoming a victim of the same. Watching him wrestle with this fear and ultimately take a brave stand against the hatred and prejudice surrounding him provided some of the book's most compelling and memorable moments.

Unfortunately, the same depth of character is not extended to his family, who seem like exaggerated caricatures of a stereotypical British household. This lack of authenticity made it difficult to connect with them emotionally or take their struggles seriously. Their presence in the story felt more like a backdrop than a fully realized part of Ewan’s world.

Despite these shortcomings, the book is undeniably well-written. Its prose and pacing hold up, even when the characters falter. More importantly, it’s clear how much this book meant—and continues to mean—to so many people. Evaluating it against contemporary literary works may not do it justice, as its value lies not only in its narrative but in its cultural and historical impact. Viewed through that lens, the book’s flaws become secondary to the courage and resonance it brought to its time.

[Jessie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is such a beautifully written story & has made its way into my top 5 favourite books.

It is incredibly sad in places. The treatment of gays in the 80s is no myth, talk of sexuality seemed to feel truly unsafe. Parents blaming themselves for how their children turned out to be 'that way' as if it were an illness.
As this book was written & published in the 80s, the book reflects the attitude of the time. Words were used carelessly, albeit common for that time, they were jarring to see used so thoughtlessly.

I feel so lucky to live in such an accepting time, however that does not mean we should take it for granted & should always remind ourselves of how our history.

[Chucho LDR · Rating 5 out of 5]

Me parece una lectura muy bonita, en algunas partes algo dura, pero que muestran la idea central del libro: el proceso de crecer y encontrar tu lugar en el mundo. La narración me pareció fluida y entretenida.

Esta es la historia de Ewan, un adolescente que descubrirá su sexualidad y las complicaciones de la vida. Pero esto no necesariamente es algo malo, a partir de sus vivencias abrirá sus ojos al mundo, principalmente laboral y sentimental.

La vida de Ewan nos recuerda como siempre se puede disfrutar el presente, buscar soluciones a los problemas y, sobre todo, que uno siempre se tiene a sí mismo.

Realmente recomiendo esta lectura, la disfrutarán mucho!

[Klaus Mattes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deutsche Übersetzung hieß "Wellenreiter", broschiert im rosa Winkel Verlag Berlin, antiquarisch weiterhin erhältlich.

Es geht um einen Jungen in einem englischen Küstenstädtchen im Südwesten, er surft gern und sein Vater fährt frühmorgens die Milch aus. Die beiden verstehen sich übrigens gut. Es geht allerdings um die erste, glückliche Liebe dieses Jungen und somit ums schwule Coming-out in der Kleinstadt. War einst ein Renner für junge Leute im England der Thatcher-Jahre, dann in Deutschland noch mal in den 1990-ern. Heute weithin vergessen.

Zum Gelingen der Sache trägt natürlich auch bei, dass man sich noch in Vor-AIDS-Zeiten befindet.

[Sam Kiely · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very interesting look at what growing up in a rural setting was like in 1980s Britain. *There are some dated parts which people should be aware of*

An easy read that looks at the ways society can affect a person's personal development with being gay. A book that was used as a battle ace during the debates of section 28. Recommended for anyone who has ever doubted their own worth.

[Tom · Rating 3 out of 5]

A likeable coming of age story. Very much of its time, the early 1980s just before the AIDS crisis, but that is part of its charm. It's not a masterpiece, it's a bit predictable and didactic, but Rees is a good enough writer that this doesn't matter too much. Better and more realistic than the majority of LGBT young adult novels/TV shows nowadays.

[Ryan Nunez · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a great read with some beautiful story telling about a young queer man in the 70s. Although it was written almost 40 years ago, it still stands true that friendship, unrequited love, and found family is true in any part of the world. Did not enjoy James introduction but was sold at the end, which made me give this 4/5.

[Charlotte · Rating 5 out of 5]

beautiful, moving, made me cry. profoundly and deeply grateful for all queer people who came before me, and especially sad reading that last line written before the aids crisis and knowing that it cut short the lives of many amazing people including the author

[Marco · Rating 4 out of 5]

So refreshing, so relatable. Probably even 5 stars. Profound and light, Ewan's story is so genuine that every queer person from
the 80s to the 2020s will find a lot of themselves in it. And Rees’ writing is a gem.

[Eugene Murphy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great read and a book that was banned in light of Section 28. Would definitely recommend this book to anyone who has experienced falling in love, not just the LGBT community.

[Nathan Osborne · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5

the way i was on the verge of tears during all eight chapters. beautiful written.

[Pat T. · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this. It had so many beautiful things to say about life and first love and coming to oneself.

[Dave Rodriguez · Rating 3 out of 5]

Este fue el libro que utilizó el Parlamento Inglés cuando discutió la controvertida ley llamada “Clause 28” que prohibía cualquier mención de la homosexualidad en las escuelas británicas. Es sorprendente que para ser un libro del 82 esté tan deconstruido, sorprendentemente en la poca bifobia que se lee en ella. Una lectura muy positiva sobre la experiencia de un joven que descubre que es disidente, la lucha tanto interna como externa para aceptarse, la travesía por el primer amor y sus primeras experiencias sexuales, su posterior liberación en una ciudad que no lo conoce y sus intentos por sanar las raíces cuando se encuentra más preparado. Es sin duda un libro que, si me hubiera pillado en plena adolescencia, me habría dado mucha esperanza.