To Miss With Love: One Inspirational Teacher One Extraordinary Year

by Katharine Birbalsingh

From the whistle-blowing teacher behind the one inspirational teacher, one extraordinary year, hope and heartbreak on the front lines of an inner-city school, To Miss With Love by Katharine Birbalsingh is the remarkable and eye opening exposé of our education system. A third of teachers leave within their first term on the job. This one wouldn't quit for all the world. Meet Furious - sixteen, handsome and completely out of control. Nothing frightens him and no one can get through to him. Now meet Munchkin - a sweet kid with glasses who's an easy target and needs protecting. Then there's Seething and Deranged, two girls who are brimming with bad attitude; Fifty and Cent, who act like gangsters but are afraid of getting beaten up; and Stoic, a brilliant young mind struggling to survive. In the midst of them all, there is a bodyguard and bouncer, a counsellor and confidante, a young woman whose job it is to motivate and inspire them and somehow keep them out of their teacher. None will make it through the year unscathed. Some may not even make it at all... Spanning a year of shocking truths and hard-won victories, of fights and phone-thefts, teenage pregnancies and the dreaded OFSTED report, this is the remarkable diary of an inner-city school teacher. Revealing the extraordinary chaos, mismanagement and wrong-thinking that plague our education system, it is a funny, surprising and sometimes heartbreaking journey from the frontlines of the classroom to the heart of modern Britain. 'The constant frustration, the struggle to hold on to your ideals in the face of a broken system - this book is the story of contemporary state education. It's both heart-breaking and inspiring' Toby Young 'Everyone should read this book and do a bit of re-thinking. Straight from the chalk-face - a book which explains why our kids have been failed by State Education' Rod Liddle 'The teacher who laid bare the chaos in the education systems. . . by delivering some brutal home truths. . . articulate and inspirational' Daily Mail 'Charismatic. . . .electrifying. . . This remarkable woman has neatly identified the problem with education' The Times Katharine Birbalsingh is Britain's most outspoken and controversial teacher. Educated at a comprehensive school, she earned a degree in philosophy and modern languages at Oxford university and has taught for over a decade in inner-city schools. To Miss with Love was for several years an anonymous blog that exposed the reality of inner-city schools and the problems with the education system. She now writes regularly for the Telegraph and has given evidence at the Commons select committee for education. Her views have sparked a national debate. www.katharinebirbalsingh.com

Genres: Education, Nonfiction, British Literature, Teaching, Teachers

304 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 2011

Reviews

[Imke · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I started this novel, I was hugely irritated by the fact that the author uses nicknames instead of normal names. This has however, not stood in the way of enjoying this novel. Reading about this teacher has in fact inspired me as a teacher: do not give up on students that do not seem to want to learn. They may surprise you.

[Laura · Rating 1 out of 5]

From BBC Radio 4 Extra - Book of the Week:
A third of teachers leave within their first term on the job. This one wouldn't quit for all the world.

Meet Furious - sixteen, handsome and completely out of control. Nothing frightens him and no one can get through to him. Now meet Munchkin - a sweet kid with glasses who's an easy target and needs protecting. Then there's Seething and Deranged, two girls who are brimming with bad attitude; Fifty and Cent, who act like gangsters but are afraid of getting beaten up; and Stoic, a brilliant young mind struggling to survive.

In the midst of them all, there is a bodyguard and bouncer, a counsellor and confidante, a young woman whose job it is to motivate and inspire them and somehow keep them out of trouble: their teacher. None will make it through the year unscathed. Some may not even make it at all.

Spanning a year of shocking truths and hard-won victories, of fights and phone-thefts, teenage pregnancies and the dreaded OFSTED report, this is the remarkable diary of an inner-city school teacher. Revealing the extraordinary chaos, mismanagement and wrong-thinking that plague our education system, it is a funny, surprising and sometimes heartbreaking journey from the frontlines of the classroom to the heart of modern Britain.

Katharine Birbalsingh has been teaching in the state school system in London for over a decade. Her dream is for all schools to become interesting and exciting places of learning, where children feel safe, happy and free to aim to be the best that they can be.

Read by Adjoa Andoh

Produced by Clive Brill
A Pacificus Production for BBC Radio 4.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00z58b2

[Petra X · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a not terribly interesting story of a year in the life of a teacher in an inner city school in the UK where the aim is to get the kids to pass with Cs. Not that all the kids are thick, deprived or badly-behaved, just that the black ones (yes, black, this is the UK not America) have a choice - bad behaviour and welcome to the peer group or work hard and accept isolation. The author who is Jamaican, or at least half, by birth or by heritage visits a couple of schools in Jamaica and is shocked at the good behaviour, manners and desire to learn of the kids in even the ghetto schools. Its like that in the West Indies. The majority of grandparents had schooling to 16 only rarely and only as a privilege and that hasn't quite worn off yet.

Its an ok book, but not one worth seeking out although I think that the author might well develop into a very good writer indeed.

[Mike Steven · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked this in the fact that it's authentic and lots of what the author talks about is true. She's a Head of English like myself so there's clearly going to be some things I can identify with and some of her anecdotes are amusing and remind me of similar occurances in my own schools.

I particularly associate with how her school year starts and finishes with the Headteacher warning them that Ofsted could come at any time - it's common in schools for the focus to be on how to 'be ready for Ofsted' rather than how to be as good as we can be. Unfortunately, that's the effect of the inspection process as it stands at the moment.

The only thing that worried me about this book is Birbalsingh's attitude to certain aspects of education. She's clearly a hardworking teacher who puts a lot of effort into her work, however, she sneaks in some strong views which suggest that she may be inflexible in her approach. She disregards mixed ability teaching groups and individual targetting setting as both being ineffective and a waste of time rather than trying to see the benefits of both systems.

She also comes across as the kind of self-righteous teacher that people outside the profession have little patience for. I don't doubt that she does work 60 to 70 hours some weeks - as she reports - however, it's not necessary to do so every week and we do get an awful lot of holiday to make up for the slog of term time. It's not an easy job, but lots of people work long working hours, doing far less enjoyable things for less pay and less holiday.

[Rose]

I agree with a lot of what Birbalsingh says, but one thing creeps me out - the fact that she is single but invents a husband and writes about him in the book as if he was completely real. You wouldn't know he wasn't unless you saw one of the news articles mentioning it. I can understand trying to disguise your marital status while you're trying to remain anonymous (not that she was by the time this was published), but she goes way beyond what's necessary, making up a husband who always calls her "soldier girl" and reminisces with his mates about how hot she used to look in short shorts. When you think that this guy is a complete figment of her imagination, that seems a bit weird. I suppose, like the kids in the book, he could be a remixed amalgam of several former boyfriends, but it still seems a bit odd to try and cram in compliments about your ass possibly said by some loser you dumped years ago.

[Bettie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Book of the Week R4



Not for me at this time.

[Hayley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am fascinated by the Michaela School of which Birbalsingh is now Head, so was interested to read this account of her earlier career. And anyone who calls themselves Snuffleupagus after the Sesame St character is OK by me. Birbalsingh questions many of the sacred cows of modern UK education and shows how hypocrisy, political dogma and a perverse distortion of 'rights'is damaging young people. Although she fails to point out that many of the elite and powerful in the UK did not earn their places through the hard work she prescribes, I do agree that this is a route to be recommended and even enforced for pupils and certainly offers more hope than many current educational practices.

[Alex · Rating 1 out of 5]

I found this book preachy, sanctimonious and patronising. Having worked in various roles in the education/youth offending sector since I graduated I simply struggled to actually believe many of the characters - allegedly based on reality. It was also put simply, just quite dull. There was the odd thing I could relate to - particularly the pressure that a looming Ofsted inspection brings to the school, but these glimpses of reality were sadly too few and far between for me. I hated her style of writing and the ridiculous names she gave to staff/pupils. Very disappointing.

[Sian Wadey · Rating 1 out of 5]

To Miss With Love by Katherine Birbalsingh

Simply put this is one of the worst books I have ever read! I only got forty or so pages in before I stopped. The author uses descriptive terms to distinguish her students so it's impossible to keep track of them all and the way she writes just makes me so annoyed. With every entry I was getting more frustrated with her. Books are supposed to make you wind down!

[Mj · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's important to understand that though fictionalised, this isn't a story. It's a polemic against the state of education in England today, disguised as a diary to try and reach an audience that would otherwise not give this subject matter a second glance.

In those terms, it does a pretty good job.

[Jade · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a teacher of 11 years who both trained and spent 8 years teaching in some of the most deprived areas of London, this book resonates and makes me angry in equal measure.

Some of her views are outdated, patronising and narrowly focused on ethnic students rather than the entirely diverse range of children she teaches.

However, her experiences of being in an inner city vulnerable school are very close to home. The depravity, the challenges, the behaviour and the emotional turmoil that you experience as a teacher, when all you want for the students you teach is to leave you with skills for life, positive memories and hopefully some decent GCSE's to ensure plenty of doors are open for them later in life.

While I relate to her experiences, aside of her toxic views, one of things that makes me angry is more a reflection of myself.

She works excessive hours and justifies neglecting her family/partner (who despite his clear suffering is very supportive), but sadly she normalises this, as if being an outstanding teacher demands you work 70 hour weeks. It took me almost 8 years to learn that this is not OK and actually you are no more successful than a teacher who works less - they just clearly are working smart.

This book does however highlight the injustices in attitudes, funding, culture and the neglect that certain areas of the UK suffers at the hands of government decisions on policy and beaucracy and those on the front line that pay the price for those decisions - teachers and most importantly students.

I would recommend this book to any teacher of any career length - it's a reminder that you are not alone in your frustrations and ilicits emotional responses and makes you question your own practices and biases.

[Elfy Lyons · Rating 3 out of 5]

Raises important points regarding the Education system in the UK, however, the tone is hard to swallow.

For example, despite aiming to present Ms Snuffle as a caring and astute teacher, Birbalsingh chooses to use derogatory 1dimensional names for the students and characters such as 'Psycho' / 'Furious' 'Polish' and 'Ms Alternative' etc which are reductive, arguably offensive and undermine any journeys and character developments these individuals go on.

Birbalsingh is keen to critique all the problems within the UK education system- however, there is very little reflection on the protagonist's own teaching practise. There seems to be very little self-reflection on why teachers like Birbalsingh's character are the exception and not the rule.

It is also unclear what her objective with her students really is - whether it is to educate them and ensure they are happy and well rounded individuals, or simply able to jump through academic hoops. For example, at one point she states to her students “It’s about living a worthwhile life", yet all priority and focus re future education is on Oxbridge. To Birbalsingh, there is no where else and the arts are pointless - with frequent digs at Art, Media Studies and Drama. At one point she laughs at a PE teacher for suggesting a promising student goes to Loughborough to do their highly respected Sports Science BA as opposed to Oxford to do English, despite how the student prefers sport and is interested in fitness and the course is one of the best in the country.

[KELLY GORTON · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is excellent. I’m not sure I quite understand the criticisms of the writing style or use of pseudonym. This did, after all, start life as a blog.

What Katharine Birbalsingh does here is, whilst loving her job, still gives an honest and open narrative of what goes on day to day at an inner city secondary school. She chooses to ask the difficult questions that the liberals of the time simply wouldn’t accept, they still don’t. She tackles the reasons for poor behaviour and resulting poor results, whilst acknowledging she won’t change the world, but she will do her best for the students she has under her charge.

The book is not tedious, maybe it’s just uncomfortable reading for some.

I have heard criticism of her for inventing a husband. I didn’t realise he was fictional but I can see why she did it, first of all he allowed her a character to argue with regarding state vs private education for her own hypothetical children, a speaker for the views of those who hate private education and most of all, to illustrate the difficulties teachers face in maintaining their home relationships and work-life balance.

[Tracey · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a teacher, I was thoroughly absorbed in this book. It gives an insight into the lives of teachers and a peek into the horrendous behaviour of the students, which is condoned by all manner of people. This book is set in the UK and is based on real life events from Katharine Birbalsingh's teaching career. It's really quite depressing and almost hopeless, especially as these aren't uniquely UK issues, they are very much western issues. But there is hope, Katharine proved it by opening up her own school and setting high standards, rejecting progressive educational methods, and maintaining a 'no excuses' behaviour policy. That school, taking students from exactly the same type of disadvantaged community, is now the top performing school in the UK, according to 2022 results. If you want a clear idea of what progressive education looks like, the education almost all western kids receive, check out this book. It shows the results of a progressive education and a society that thinks being soft on kids is kind and works. (PS. The nicknames she gives people is annoying at first but very quickly you get used to them and come to find them really quite amusing.)

[Emma · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is another book I had to read for school. I have to admit it read much easier than the previous one. It was in a blog kind of style, every piece about a different day for an entire school year from the teacher's pov. All the names are fake, to hide the identity form every one she writes about. Since it's a true story. In the beginning it was odd, but eventually I got used to it. It did give an intresting insight into an average state school in The UK, but it's just not my genre. I you want to know more, or just gather more insights in British state schools and the education system, this is a good one to pick up. Especially if you're thinking about becoming a teacher yourself.

[Annemijn.P · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really shows you the difficulties of being a teacher

[Melissa Doremalen · Rating 2 out of 5]

Seems to be a retelling of to sir with love with a woman's touch. Still pretty good.

[Maire · Rating 4 out of 5]

'Hi, Cent. Great. While we're here, just the two of us, I've been wondering, where is you family from?'
'From Nigeria. Lagos.'
'And how long have you been here?' I can still hear a hint of an accent in his speech.
'Three years innit.;
'All this bad behaviour of yours. I'm guessing you would never have behaved in Nigeria the way you do here, right?'
'No, Miss,' he answers, hanging his head.
'So why is that?'
'It's Africa, Miss. That's how it is there. Yeah? It's like a family. It isn't like here.'
'I don't understand.'
Cent has trouble answering the question. He keeps saying that the environment is different, that it's impossible to explain, that I would have to go there to see why children simply don't misbehave in Nigeria. Eventually he laughs. 'It's 'cause you'll get beaten bad in Nigeria, Miss, man, teachers and parents. Everyone beats ya.'
'And you think being beaten is the only reason you behave? I mean, if we beat you here, would you behave?'
Cent's eyes look straight at me. 'Yeah, yeah, yeah.'
'And is that the only difference then? Between school in Nigeria and school in London?'
Cent shakes his head. 'Nay, that ain't it. It's Africa, man, it's like a family.'
'What do you mean by "it's like a family"?'
''Cause there's too much violence in London, man! Nigeria is a safe place. Look at all 'em stabbings!'
Leaving aside the very bizarre conclusion that Lagos is less violent than London, I'm still confused. 'You mean to say that the stabbings out there' - I gesture towards the open air and the world beyond the school - 'are the reason you misbehave in here?'
Cent shakes his head. 'Nah nah, I mean that you have to be seen to be "in" with the bad ones here, otherwise yuh get robbed, man, or yuh get beat. They need to know your face as one of 'em.'
'You mean that, if they know who you are, they'll leave you alone?'
'Yeah, so they knows your face, yuh know? Yuh gotta be one of them. Yuh gotta blend, so then when you pass 'em, they knows yuh.' Cent pushes his chin forward. 'And yuh don't get robbed.'
I smile, as if the penny is dropping. 'And there isn't that outside pressure to be bad in Nigeria?'
Cent shakes his head. 'Nah, Miss, it's like a family.'
'So where would you rather be then, Cent, here, or Nigeria?'
'Well, both, Miss. Here, 'cause it's a rich country, there is more opportunities like, but Africa, 'cause it's Africa, 'cause my friends and family are there.'
'Don't you have any friends here?'
'Yeah, but they isn't friends like in Nigeria, people you can count on. Like, they is just people I know.'
'What do you mean? Don't you have anyone who you would call a friend here?'
'Fifty. That's it. He's the only one I'd call a friend. You nuh understand, Miss. Remember what happened to Cavalier? Wholesome knew it was gonna happen. They all knew. No one did anything to stop it, yeah. That wouldn't happen in Africa. Africa is like a family.' (282)

[Louise Armstrong · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant! She articulates many of my own feelings about state education. It's so dreadful to fail so many people!

I bet she's a superb teacher. This book was well written. It read really easily, with lots of techniques to make it palatable. It's written in diary form in the present tense, so it feels as if it's happening now. The information and her political/educational ideas are presented wrapped around individual incidents and anecdotes that illustrate what she means. Opposing points of view are presented as being spoken by characters - people at meetings, guest speakers, parents etc. Really fantastic read.

What my students wanted was to be MADE to learn. Sure they kicked and moaned it was boring, but they were happiest when I made them work.

I'm wasn't so bothered about being inspected, even though I never got more than a 2 ('Never mind, Miss,' said my students, 'there's some awful teachers with grade ones!') I think that you can include activities, I like them, but I don't think you should dumb anything down. Help people get up, but keep the bar high.

Malcolm Gladwell says that state education is fine, it's just that kids don't get enough of it - it's the holidays that are the problem, and early Wednesdays, and finishing at 4. Think how long kids at boarding school spend studying.

[Gwen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am an English teacher (just your bog standard classroom type) and for that reason alone, found it a fascinating read.

Each school is it's very own unique little institutional universe and we teachers get institutionalised by our place of work. I'm working in my 3rd school in nearly 9 yrs of teaching and each has been totally different, so to read about an inner city school and the problems that that entails was fascinating to me. I've worked in an inner city school in the midlands and recognised many of the characters and issues highlighted by this teacher.

However, I didn't realise, as one reviewer stated that the husband 'Liberal' was an invention of the author which does kind of bring her credility into question.

Neither did I think it was terribly well written - I'd expect better of an English teacher.

Finally, schools and children are a veritable mine of fun, humour and downright daftness and was disappointed that that was not also present in the book. The lack of wit and humour felt like a disappointment.

Mind you, got some useful ideas for teaching in places...

[Mara Shaw · Rating 3 out of 5]

Worth a read if you're interested in the current educational crisis in England. This is very much what my daughter is experiencing in the English school system, having just moved here from Canada.

The book is a fictional diary from a real teacher in an inner-city London school. The writing style is breezy, but the conflicts she presents are unfortunately quite real.

As the English tell me, the social system in England is very broken -- and some causes are evident in Ms. Birbalsingh's book. There is no easy fix, but we can begin to at least see the reality.

[Nisha · Rating 2 out of 5]

I watch on in amazement. My little Munchkin just helped that woman. No one told him what to do. We try to teach charm and manners at school, but more often than not, we fail miserably. It was as if, by instinct, he just knew what he should do. The other people in the tube look on at the spectacle. 'He's mine,' I want to cry out. 'Munchkin belongs to me.' My heart swells with pride.

[Cham · Rating 5 out of 5]

Authentic, engaging and light-hearted, and yet surfaces the many issues in the British education system, as well as the life of teachers.

Awesome read!

[Oliver Kaye · Rating 4 out of 5]

A light hearted and amusing description of what is a serious problem with some of our schools. An experienced insiders view.

[Graham · Rating 5 out of 5]

given by father in law at christmas, read in a day. Sad to know other people have it worse than me; sometimes wonder how folk cope in difficult schools. Hat taken off to 'miss'.

[Philippa Brunt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Inspirational and well written.

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this eye opening book about life at an inner-city secondary school. I heard it adapted for radio initially and wanted to read the full copy. I wasn't disappointed.

[Colleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This took me back to the schools I taught at. Very realistic depiction of inner city schools in London. Too bad she lost her job over this book because it's a wake up call.

[Asli · Rating 2 out of 5]

I've read this and to sir with love, but I liked the latter one beter. To miss with love was not bad but also not great, it is one of those books that didn't really leave an impact on me.