In Love and In Danger: A Teen's Guide to Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships

by Barrie Levy

With one out of eleven high school students in the past year experiencing some form of physical abuse — being hit, slapped, or physically hurt on purpose by a boyfriend or girlfriend — young adults need to know where they can turn for help. Even more teens (as high as ninety-six percent) reported emotional and psychological abuse in their relationships.

This revised and updated edition for teenagers who have questions about abusive dating relationships helps them understand the causes and consequences of their situation, learn what they can do about it, find help from parents and other adults, and discover how to build healthier relationships. In Love and in Danger is one of the only books available on dating violence and abusive relationships that addresses young adults directly in a straightforward and non-condescending manner. Included are facts about dating violence, tips for how to tell if your relationship is abusive, information on why dating abuse happens, and what you can do if you are being abused by (or are abusing) someone you love. Packed with practical advice and compelling interviews with teens, this edition features updated information and statistics, an expanded resource section, and a new afterword by the author.

Genres: Nonfiction, Adolescence, Psychology, Abuse

144 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 1993

Reviews

[Lupe De La Pena · Rating 4 out of 5]

The only reason why i liked this book because it sadly shows the reality of some couples and it goes on in the real world. It’s also such a hurtful book at the same time because it shows nothing but the truth that goes on in some couples daily lives. I would recommend it to someone who is going through it or similar to the stories. Hopefully helps them open up their eyes and get the help they need to realize on what’s going on. I feel like this book should be more out there and more people to see this.

[Junieth · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book because it was relatable to my situation and I noticed toxic tendencies. I also liked it because it was helpful and I would recommend it to others because it has good advice and can be used as a tool for dating in general not only abusive relationships. I also really enjoyed chapter 13 because I unfortunately know many people in abusive relationships and I’d also like to know how to approach that situation aside from mine.

[Geraldine Marin · Rating 4 out of 5]

an easy read that everyone can get into. it is helpful to understand the complexities of abusive relationships. gives different perspectives, which i appreciate. doesn't just center on the abuse afflicted on victums but also gives insight on why abusers do what they do and provides resources on how to stop. i recommend this book to anyone trying to understand this situation (if they are going through it or know someone who is) or if you want to recognize abusive habits for future relationships.

[star · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked this book because it had shared experiences and taught a lot on how even things you don’t realize can be the start to an unhealthy relationship. I would recommend this book to young girls to bring attention/spread awareness to abusive relationships and the red flags you should look out for.

[Tia]

This was sitting on my desk. I was surprised to see that this was originally published when I was 10 years old. The stories in the beginning of this book are still immensely relatable today. 32 years later. Only now, there is social medias and location services that allow abusers so much more access to their victims. It is mind blowing that I can read a text published that many years ago and we still have these abusive, toxic relationships happening. My heart hurts and I am not even done.

[Tiera · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the most relatable book that I have ever read!. I recomend this book to every women out there who had or thinks they are in a toxic relationship.Even if your not its a good book to read to make yourself aware of what a toxic relationship and abuse is.

[Maribel Ramirez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I feel it helped me with my triggers and look for red flags in my future relationships! This book was very powerful for me! I would definitely recommend to all my friends/family that are going thru an abusive relationship and it doesn’t need to be with boy friends or girl friends it could be towards friends or family!!

[Valerie Arrona · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think " In Love and In Danger" was great, I liked the book but it made me sad although it had good messages, I would recommend it to everyone because It's good to have insight on unhealthy relationships. I feel like young woman could learn how to set boundaries from reading "In love and In Dander" I guess men could learn too as well, and both genders could put their inner self love first, as the book helps you reflect a lot on the misery you can carry and spread in a unhealthy relationship.

[Andrew · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good overview on abuse and the many forms it takes. Should only take an afternoon to read. Get good and drunk after reading it, and hug someone who has treated you well. You may want to.

[Zero · Rating 4 out of 5]

I wish my mother had a book like this when she was younger, I wish I had a book like this to help me look out for signs of abuse when I was younger.

This book had a lot of great advice but when we got to the part about what to do if you find that you’re abusive/how to stop being abusive it felt like it didn’t explain how even if they change you need to leave well enough. And I feel like that’s a problem in itself since I knew people who would leave an abuser, the abuser got “better” they got back with the abuser (or never really left the abuser at all), and then the abuser just went back at it.

Other than that little detail I found this was great advice.

[Tegan | Snakes Don't Wear Braces · Rating 3 out of 5]

This text has a good heart as a foundation but has become quite dated with some of the context and theory having changed substantially in the intervening 17 years from its most recent edition. There are some good chapters though that can be helpful in discussing with teens what ahealthy relationship might look like.

[Monica M · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked this book because i can relate to it and it also helps with relationship situations and real life problems i would recommend this book to family and friends that you know are struggling with a bad or toxic relationship.

[Anaya Guerrero · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't dislike this book AT ALL! I really enjoyed it. I think i would recommend it to everyone b/c it doesn't deserve to be underrated and i think anyone can get something out of this book either a lesson, advice and can pass it down to those who are struggling.

[Baby Gaeta · Rating 5 out of 5]

i liked it because it talks about real things/ expiriences like domestic violence especially in younger relashionships which is important to talk about

[Beauty Morales · Rating 5 out of 5]

Liked it shows other girls know there value/ worth , I would recommend it too women’s struggling to get out of a toxic relationship or anyone !

[Arlene Desiree · Rating 5 out of 5]

i really enjoyed reading this book it was an eye opener. I loved it i would recommend all the girls to read this book.

[Drea]

Parts of this books are phenomenal, and part of it are not. I understand wanting to put the actual stories in, but I feel like the whole first chapter didn't really work well. And I'm not saying they don't happen, but the little blurbs along the rest of the chapters were way more relatable to teens. There were some parts, especially the safety planning, that seemed more adult orientated than teens. (Or at least teens in my mind/that I work with, which are roughly grade 6 - 12) My only decision now is if the good parts outweigh the bad ones...at least enough to put it in my library collection.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very helpful book for teenagers dealing with abusive relationships and how to get help and get through them. It is also good for counselors, like me, to talk to and help teenagers dealing with this and educate them.

[Zev · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderful resource for teens, and I'm so glad Levy included adults in her audience too. The vignettes and journaling exercises are going to be so, so valuable to teens going through this. I'm grateful this was written.

[Ann]

I enjoy this book but dislike the fact of annoying language. like "the" and repeat "afraid" more than 1000 time. literally incompetent.

[Tricia Hoffman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Simple and easy-to-read book for teens who may be struggling in abusive dating relationships.

[Michael · Rating 4 out of 5]

An interesting take on dealing with abusive relationships. The first chapter should have been "how NOT to get into an abusive relationship". Other than that, it was interesting.

[Destiny Jones · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book really helps teens get through abusive relationships. I think this book would be a big life saver to alot of yound eenages that are going through bad, and abusive relationships.

[Evelyn Salcido · Rating 3 out of 5]

Explains and patterns of abuse is never explained so clearly then form the victims themselves. This is that.