Fragile Edge: A Personal Portrait of Loss on Everest

by Maria Coffey

"Maria Coffey's tale is at once a deeply personal love story and a penetrating look into the world of professional climbers. Such clarity and honesty are seldom seen in mountain writing." - Greg Child, author of Postcards from the Ledge



Critically acclaimed Fragile Edge won the coveted the International Literary Mountain prize for Maria Coffey's eloquently written story of how climbing tragedies affect those who are left behind. This is a powerful story describes how she survived the loss of her long-time partner, dealing with the sorrow and confusion, anger and healing.



With openness and honesty, Coffey describes her love affair with elite British mountaineer Joe Tasker, who perished with his climbing partner Peter Boardman while attempting Everest's then-unclimbed Northeast Ridge in 1982. She relives her experiences, first within the hard-partying mountaineering scene and then during her long journey to understanding and acceptance of the tragedy that cost her the man she loved. She gives us an insider's view of the life of a world-class mountaineer and recounts her deeply moving pilgrimage with Boardman's widow across Tibet, a journey that retraced Tasker and Boardman's steps to their abandoned Advance Base Camp at 21,000 feet on Everest.

Genres: Mountaineering, Climbing, Biography, Nonfiction, Memoir, Adventure, Outdoors

192 pages, Paperback

First published February 27, 1990

Reviews

[chucklesthescot · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book has been on my shelf for a long time so I decided it was time to read it. I was interested in reading a book about the world of mountain climbing from the viewpoint of the girlfriend left at home, worring about the safety of the climber.

In 1982 two of Britain's brightest climbing stars-Joe Tasker and Pete Boardman-vanished while climbing a new route on Everest. Maria Coffey had been Joe's girlfriend for about two years when he vanished. His body has never been found. This is her story about her difficult relationship with Joe, competing with the mountains for his attention, and the pain and confusion of his death. It also covers the memorial trip to Everest with the widow of Pete Boardman.

As Maria is not a climber, I knew in advance that this book was not going to cover any climbing, other than hearing short stories from Joe and others who had returned from a recent expedition. I knew that the book was going to focus on all the highs and lows of her relationship with Joe, and how she coped with his death.

To be honest, I didn't like Joe very much. By definition, climbers agree that they are selfish people and it is not easy to have a relationship with them. They are prepared to leave loved ones for months at a time for dangerous climbs that could kill them, and even when they are at home, they are planning new trips or doing talks about where they have been. Maria had doubts about getting involved with Joe and I can see why. She talks about how impatient he would get when she tried to explain her fears, his attitude being 'you know what you signed up for'. When she tried to show her feelings he withdrew emotionally, leaving her wondering if she meant anything to him. He goes away for months at a time without a care yet sulked when he got home early to find that Maria wouldn't cancel a short holiday that she had planned months ago with friends to keep her occupied while he was away. And of course, he was also leaving her for periods of time to have at least one affair with another woman. I don't understand why she was staying with someone who treated her so badly.

Maria is honest about her insecurity about Joe and where she fit into his life. I had the impression that Joe was happy to have someone to watch his house and tend to his needs when he came home but didn't actually love Maria herself. I think he loved the idea of a loyal girlfriend waiting for him more than the reality of being in a relationship with her. Had he lived, I have doubts about their relationship lasting very long as he certainly didn't care about her feelings or needs and had no intention of marrying her and having kids. She admits that being lonely led her into a brief affair and she seems unhappy all the time as she remembers her life with Joe. It's not a life that I would have chosen to live. Her life with her husband Dag sounds much happier.

While the story was quite interesting, there was a lot of repetition as she rehashed the same fights that they were having about her feelings and his lack of attention to her, and Maria confused me at times by jumping around in the timeline, meaning that parts of the book lacked cohesion or structure. The part where she describes being told about Joe going missing was somewhat vague and it made it difficult to feel the emotion of the situation.

I'd describe this as an interesting and decent read, rather than anything brilliant but I think there will be a good market for this book amongst non climbers like me. I have already read her second book which I enjoyed much more.

[Jeannette Hartman · Rating 5 out of 5]

When Maria Coffey met Joe Tasker, she felt like she had come home. But Joe Tasker was a man living in two worlds: the cold treacherous slopes of the world's highest and most deadly mountains, and the comfortable, sociable, hard-partying world of England's Derbyshire.

Where she wanted commitment and permanence, he could only tell her that as long as he was climbing, he couldn't make commitments. He asked nothing of her and had no expectations; she should do likewise.

Then Joe Tasker and his climbing partner Peter Boardman went missing on the east-north-east ridge of Mount Everest in May 1982. Immersed in grief, Maria struggled to understand what had drawn Joe to such dangerous heights, putting his life and their relationship at risk.

At the suggestion of Boardman's widow, Hilary, the two got to Tibet to climb to Advance Base Camp and try to come to terms with their losses. In poignant, moving words, Coffey describes the challenges of living with a climber, her journey with Hilary to confront (and ultimately captivated) by the mountain that took their husbands' lives.

She has omitted information in this book that she discusses in other books ("Where the Mountain Casts Its Shadow"), but it is a moving addition to her exploration of what drives mountain climbers to risk their lives and how spouses, lovers, family and friends cope with the ultimate loss when an accident happens on high.

[Sally Edsall · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very good book, presenting a very different perspective on mountaineering. This is the impact that the sport / lifestyle has on those at home - the loved ones.

Maria Coffey provides a frank account of her life in and around the hard-partying, high stakes lifestyle of the British climbing community in the late 1970s and early 1980s. She falls in love with Joe Tasker, who disappeared on Mt Everest in 1982 with Pete Boardman. They were part of the British team attempting the east north east ridge ascent. Chris Bonington was part of that team.

After their death, Maria, and Hilary, Boardman's widow undertake their own journey to Tibet - seeking resolution, answers, closeness to their lovers...

She is very frank about the nature of her relationship with Tasker and her fears, his shortcomings as a partner etc. The second part is about the journey Maria takes, both physical, and emotional in dealing with the loss of a partner.

In a way, it seems Hilary was better able to deal with the emotional trauma because of the surety of her relationship with Boardman. Maria and Joe had yet to make a long-term commitment.
A frank and revealing and very personal story. If you are addicted to Everest and mountaineering books (as I am) this is a worthy one to add to the collection.

[James · Rating 3 out of 5]

First half is not great, mainly because I didn’t really like the way Joe comes off. The second half, however, is really a lovely account of coming to terms with loss and specifically the risk/reward that comes with a mountaineering career.

[Kat Doll · Rating 2 out of 5]

i should have read the title more carefully. this was not what i was expecting at all...

[Margaret Guthrie · Rating 5 out of 5]

fascinating!

Fascinating. Kept reading me reading for 1 1/2 days nonstop until I finished the book. Even if you are not into mountaineering it is fascinating.

[Mazola1 · Rating 2 out of 5]

In 1982, two of Britain's top mountain climbers, Joe Tasker and Pete Boardman, disappeared attempting a first ascent of Mount Everest by the north east ridge. In Fragile Edge, Maria Coffey, Tasker's girlfriend at the time, writes about how she dealt with his death. It is a story of loss complicated by the intensity of Tasker's almost single-minded devotion to his dangerous sport, and the fact that his body was not found and no one knew how he died.

Coffey admits that from the beginning, her relationship with Tasker was difficult. Six weeks after she and Tasker became lovers in 1980, he left to climb K2. It would be his second attempt to climb K2. On the first, a friend had been killed by an avalanche. Tasker wrote Coffey from K2 saying the expedition had been hit by an avalanche, but everyone survived, and they were going to make a second attempt to summit. The letter filled her with desperation and anger, and wonder at why Tasker would risk his life climbing.

When Tasker returned home, he was constantly busy lecturing about the expedition, and planning the next one, a winter expedition to Everest. Coffey writes that Tasker's brush with death on K2 did not weaken his drive to climb big mountains, but instead confirmed it as the focus of his life. For her part, Coffey was filled with panic at his high-risk undertakings. Her answer to how she coped with this was that "the intensity of everything made me feel totally alive."

Tasker returned in February, 1981, and immediately began planning an expedition to China that summer. After that, he planned to attempt Everest from the north side seven months later, and then to return to K2 six months after that. Before leaving for Everest, Tasker told Coffey he couldn't commit to a relationship, it wouldn't be fair to her, what with his climbing and all his committments. Coffey describes Tasker as a "deeply private man" and says he never would have married while he remained climbing, but it is obvious that she desired a deeper relationship than Tasker was willing to have with her.

In May, 1981, Coffey received word that Tasker and his climbing partner Pete Boardman had been killed on Mount Everest. Together with Boardman's widow, Coffey went to Tibet to see Mount Everest. They saw the ridge where the two climbers were last seen, and climbed as far as Advance Base Camp. This made Coffey feel close to Tasker, and she was able to recognize several places that he had photographed. Looking at the mountain, Coffey decided that there was "a simplicity and a beauty in the manner of his death, no debilatating illness or sordid car accident but a strong and certain overwhelming by the forces of the mountain." In Tibet, Coffey came to accept the reality of Tasker's death and thought she gained a deeper understanding of the reasons he climbed.

Coffey wanted to believe that Tasker's death had some meaning and was not just a stupid waste, but with time, she began to question even this. She says of Tasker and his climbing friends that they went on expeditions with full knowledge of the danger, and having made a decision to take a calculated risk, "a decision which had far-reaching consequences for the families, lovers and friends who had no part in its making." Of the climbers who lost their lives climbing, she says "climbing was their dream, and an important part of what made them so vibrant; we survivors have to try to accept that, while coming to terms with the fact that it also took them away too soon."

In the end, Fragile Edge is an unsatifying book. For the most part, it reads as if Coffey is trying to convince herself that Tasker was worth loving and that she came to terms with his death. The reality that comes through between the lines is that, despite her trip to Tibet, she still harbored deep resentment at Tasker, and was indelibly marked by bitterness that he loved climbing more than he loved her.

[Amerynth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having previously read Maria Coffey's fascinating and excellent book "Where the Mountain Casts Its Shadow: The Personal Costs of Climbing," I was already familiar with the broad strokes of the story in her memoir "Fragile Edge: A personal portrait of loss on Everest." I knew I would like this book because Coffey really has something interesting to say.

"Fragile Edge" is the story of her relationship with Joe Tasker, who disappeared high on Mt. Everest, along with his climbing partner Pete Boardman in 1982. They were two of England's top high-altitude mountaineers at time.

Even though it was written about six years after their deaths, Coffey's book comes across as very raw. Emotions tumble out as she struggles with Tasker's devotion to climbing and putting his life in danger and willingness to leave her behind (even before his death.) Coffey, who is not a climber herself, has an interesting viewpoint that is not often explored in mountaineering-related memoirs.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this book. Maria Coffey tells this story from the heart, and it reads like a novel. So many times you see the story of climbers or extreme athletes, but not from the perspective of someone left behind as their spouse or lover lives on the edge. THroughout the story as she comes to terms with her loss, she also really tries to understand what would make someone want to risk their life doing things like climbing Everest.

[Sean · Rating 3 out of 5]

An engaging read that provides a different take on the usual mountain-lit formula. Coffey shares a glimpse behind the scenes of the mountaineering world and offers a heartfelt account of life after tragedy. She writes with clarity and emotion. Her vivid descriptions and literary power to capture the subtleties of her surroundings had me reading some sections — especially during her travels through China and Tibet — several times.

[Steve Chilton · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author was the Joe Tasker's girlfriend, and her book illustrates the effects of (predominantly) male heroics on the families/girlfriends, etc. who are not part of their adventures. There is a raw emotion in her depiction of grief and loss. Interesting to compare with other books on the risks climbers take and the toll those risks takers create (eg Joe Simpson's 'Game of Ghosts').

[Di · Rating 4 out of 5]

A book that told the story of two climbers who died climbing one of the big mountains ... from the perspective of the girlfriend left behind.

Interesting for all kinds of reasons, not the least being that it fleshes out the story of the two writer/climbers who died.

[Donald · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a bad book... This was a climbers GF and how she dealt with his passing on Everest. The entire book is pretty sad, but not a bad read all in all.

[Wendy Hollister]

A very sad account of Maria's relationship with climber Joe. She had a tough time dealing with her grief and the loss of Joe who died climbing Everest.