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64 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1989
at my first opera,
I watched a swarm of matches
light up the Roman arena
until we were silent. It was as if
music were a night-blooming flower
that would not open
until we held our breath.
Then the full-blown sound,
the single-minded combat
of passion: voices sharpening
their glittering blades on one another,
electing to live or die.
It was that simple. The story was
of no importance, the motive lost
in the sufficient, breathing dark.
If there was a moon I don’t remember.
That was when they began
Carlota’s lapses, her erasures
She wiped out the unbearable,
erased her husband’s execution
and lived for sixty oblivious years
in an out-of-the-way palace,
her exclusive madhouse,
wondering vaguely each evening
why he did not join her for dinner.
In the end it is music that saves us.
the Waldstein Sonata. We move
to couches and padded chairs,
rest our heads against pillows.
Petunias, blue velvet,
bloom in a bowl. For a long time
we listen and no one says anything.
When we do, our voices have changed.
…It is there to keep me honest. I look at a couple having coffee
in a diner late at night; their relationship is ambiguous; she looks
fragile, vulnerable, no longer quite young; his forehead is shad-
owed by the wide brim of his hat. Their faces are bleached by the
merciless light. The gaunt-faced waiter leans forward; he wants to
tell them about himself. They are someone to talk to in this plate-
glass house with the redundant salt and pepper shakers, the care-
fully spaced chrome napkin holders…
…a mystery. Forty-five years ago, when Hopper painted
these people, did he know they would endure? I see them down-
town in the underground concourse below the glass hotel and the
granite-and-marble bank; in tat spooky region line with over-
priced ships selling cheap goods, and drab cafes tarted up with
lights. There they are, no older, only he is hatless these days. The
waiter-turned-waitress is still thin-faced and can’t support her kids
on what she makes…