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The Llama Parlour
Love is in the air - or is it only Kat's car exhaust? The thing I longed for the most was to fall in love. I wanted an American Romeo, hot off the press, home-delivered. Nothing special, as long as he had pectorals, a PhD, a nice bum, a non-sexist attitude, a top tan, a well-read penis, pale blue eyes, could cook souffles, arm-wrestle crocodiles and wanted a loving relationship with bone marrow-melting sex. Now, was that too much to ask of a billionaire? Kat Kennedy is bored with Australian life. Especially the men. So when she wins a part in a top American sitcom, she jumps at the chance to experience some Hollywood glamour. Even if they do wear sunglasses indoors. But even her new best friend, the straight-talking Tash, can't prepare Kat for a town where the men have love-bites on their mirrors, there is no law of gravity (skin sags upwards), and they say 'Have a nice day' - and then shoot you. And then there's the irresistible superstar Pierce Scanlen. But can Kat compete with the other great love of his life - himself?
Paperback
First published January 1, 1992
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171 people want to read
About the author
Kathy Lette
63 books249 followersKathy Lette divides her time between being a full time writer,
demented mother (now there's a tautology) and trying to find a shopping trolley that doesn't have a clubbed wheel.
Kathy first achieved succés de scandale as a teenager with the novel Puberty Blues, now a major motion picture.
After several years as a singer with the Salami Sisters and a newspaper columnist in Sydney and New York (collected in the book "Hit and Ms") and as a television sitcom writer for Columbia Pictures in Los Angeles, her novels, "Puberty Blues" (1979) "Girls Night Out" (1988), "The Llama Parlour" (1991), "Foetal Attraction" (1993), "Mad Cows" (1996),"Altar Ego" (1998) "Nip'N'Tuck" (2001), "Dead Sexy" (2003) and "How To Kill Your Husband (and other handy household hints)" (2006) became international best-sellers. Kathy Lette's plays include "Grommits", "Wet Dreams", "Perfect Mismatch" and "I'm So Happy For You I Really Am".
She lives in London with her husband and two children and has just finished a stint as writer in Residence at London's Savoy Hotel.
Kathy says that the best thing about being a writer is that you get to work in your jammies all day, drink heavily on the job and have affairs and call it research! (Although her husband says he should have the affair as it would give her a better book!)
demented mother (now there's a tautology) and trying to find a shopping trolley that doesn't have a clubbed wheel.
Kathy first achieved succés de scandale as a teenager with the novel Puberty Blues, now a major motion picture.
After several years as a singer with the Salami Sisters and a newspaper columnist in Sydney and New York (collected in the book "Hit and Ms") and as a television sitcom writer for Columbia Pictures in Los Angeles, her novels, "Puberty Blues" (1979) "Girls Night Out" (1988), "The Llama Parlour" (1991), "Foetal Attraction" (1993), "Mad Cows" (1996),"Altar Ego" (1998) "Nip'N'Tuck" (2001), "Dead Sexy" (2003) and "How To Kill Your Husband (and other handy household hints)" (2006) became international best-sellers. Kathy Lette's plays include "Grommits", "Wet Dreams", "Perfect Mismatch" and "I'm So Happy For You I Really Am".
She lives in London with her husband and two children and has just finished a stint as writer in Residence at London's Savoy Hotel.
Kathy says that the best thing about being a writer is that you get to work in your jammies all day, drink heavily on the job and have affairs and call it research! (Although her husband says he should have the affair as it would give her a better book!)
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Displaying 1 - 25 of 25 reviews
dnf
July 30, 2025DNF - Absolutely not my cup of tea. I gave up at around 15% at the second attempt.
I didn't like the characters and the language at all. Usually I try to give a book chance until I'm at least 30% done with, but this book I didn't like from the first page and it got worse with each chapter and even if I'm risking to miss out on a good book I wasn't able to force it anymore :-(
I didn't like the characters and the language at all. Usually I try to give a book chance until I'm at least 30% done with, but this book I didn't like from the first page and it got worse with each chapter and even if I'm risking to miss out on a good book I wasn't able to force it anymore :-(
September 28, 2012
Embarrassing 90s nonsense.
July 26, 2015
I don't normally write reviews, but in this case I felt compelled to help counteract all the negative ones. I'm really surprised there aren't more positive reviews of this book on here (but then again I am a bit of a weirdo). I really enjoyed it! I picked it up because it was one of the only English books in a bookswap point in an old phone box in Germany, and I loved the 90sness of the cover (it turns out to have a very 90s feel in general, which might annoy some people, but I love that). The blurb on my copy doesn't really sum it up at all...it's about a lot more than love, sex, shallowness etc. (although those are some of the 'themes') - the blurb on here gives a better idea, but still doesn't describe it very well. I found it very, very, very fun! It's a silly, zany romp, kinda farcical, and at times exhaustingly fast-paced, but with a healthy dose of realism, and it made me laugh out loud quite often! I was initially put off by the subject matter of the first chapter, but then gave it another chance when I felt like something 'light', although it surprised me in that respect sometimes too, as it could be quite philosophical, serious and sad (yep, really!). Unlike this review, I thought it was actually really well-written (apart from Abe's accent, which annoyed me, a few offensive quips, and a few typos, at least in my 1991 edition), and it's pretty feminist, too, which is an awesome bonus. I always have a lot of books on the go, and although I'm reading some great stuff, nothing usually holds my attention for very long so I'm constantly switching between them every few chapters. But I was reading this one pretty much non-stop and I got through it a lot quicker than most of my books!
July 28, 2014
In a nutshell, I found this book dated and silly. Were we all that daft, vapid and childish in the 90s? I found the main character so wet that I longed to punch her in the ovaries - Ron Burgundy-style - and kept getting annoyed that serious subjects (*gay man has HIV klaxon*, *long-lost child klaxon*) were even included. The book was trying to be light-hearted and serious at the same time and I just found that incongruous. I mean, what's funny about herpes? Bugger all in my opinion. It's with a heavy heart that I wonder if it's possible to be too old for a book.
June 22, 2012
perhaps in the past you have been tempted to say that a certain book you read was the worst book ever. well, boy were you wrong. this book is without a doubt absolutely the worst book ever. it was so bad that i had to ke ep reading just to assure myself that it wasn´t going to suddenly make a change and redeem itself. and, hey, being the worst just means that you´re the best at being terrible.
July 11, 2011
Kat's in Hollywood to meet a man who doesn't have love bites on his mirror. Nothing special, as long as he has a nice bum, a PhD and wants a loving relationship with bone-marrow-melting sex. Now, is that too much to ask of a billionaire? For Kat, love is in the air...or is it only her car exhaust...
One word - rubbish, never been so disappointed in a book.
One word - rubbish, never been so disappointed in a book.
August 29, 2011
I didn't find this book particularly funny. I didn't buy into the depiction of Hollywood and the characters just didn't work for me.
Halfway through it was a bit like wading through sludge and I almost gave up, however I rarely put a book down unfinished so I persisted but it ddn't get bettter.
Halfway through it was a bit like wading through sludge and I almost gave up, however I rarely put a book down unfinished so I persisted but it ddn't get bettter.
August 22, 2013
not particularly funny & Kat just got on my nerves
October 30, 2014
Not very good, you just want to shake some sense into the main character throughout most of the book.
April 6, 2015
A very odd book for me. A young Aussie goes to Hollywood, told with a great deal of bizarre sex and swearing. Generally well-written, but not really my cup of tea.
February 16, 2009
“What did I like about him?… I liked the fact that he’d worked out how many years of your life you spend trying to ring someone. He was the only person I knew who wondered if God saw people when He took acid. I liked the way he touched me all the time. I liked the way he wondered why he couldn’t tickle himself. And how could I not like a bloke who’d faked an orgasm with a prostitute because he didn’t want to hurt her feelings?”
I think that I have read something by this author, but I can’t remember. Even if I have read them, and hated them, I have a compulsion to buy authors that I have read. Also, on the cover there is a blurb that says, ‘It cheered me up’ - Salman Rushdie… sounds promising, no?
The quoted bit was the only bit that I even remotely enjoyed… the narrator said things like ‘gi-normous’. Very annoying. And she tried to phonetically write out different accents, which was over the top and annoying as well. Unlike TRAINSPOTTING, where it worked. Not much in this book ‘worked’.
I think that I have read something by this author, but I can’t remember. Even if I have read them, and hated them, I have a compulsion to buy authors that I have read. Also, on the cover there is a blurb that says, ‘It cheered me up’ - Salman Rushdie… sounds promising, no?
The quoted bit was the only bit that I even remotely enjoyed… the narrator said things like ‘gi-normous’. Very annoying. And she tried to phonetically write out different accents, which was over the top and annoying as well. Unlike TRAINSPOTTING, where it worked. Not much in this book ‘worked’.
June 23, 2008
Funny chick-lit from a former writer on The Facts of Life. Having been written in the early '90s, some elements are dated, but others are still relevant. A cute satire of California and Hollywood celebutante culture through the eyes of a Australian naif, and I love the Aussie colloqualisms.
February 22, 2011
I could not resist the Blurb, Kathy Lette's first intro to me was her list of books to read - so I thought i would try one of her, not disspointing - very funny. My kind of wit.
22/02/11
not too great, bit painful to read - perhaps my mind was not in it...
22/02/11
not too great, bit painful to read - perhaps my mind was not in it...
December 20, 2007
didn't enjoy it as much as Foetal Attraction, but it was still an entertaining read.
February 9, 2008
Why does anyone think she is funny?
July 6, 2008
Very funny, I like Kathy Lette's humour
September 27, 2012
Read it to broaden my reading. Task done.
Read
August 1, 2017Sad to say but this book does nothing for me. Normally I would keep going and persevere with a bad read but alas with this one I will not bother, really bad.
January 20, 2018
I wanted to like this book but just couldn't. the characters are so contrived and unlikable. The plot twists were obvious too.
February 27, 2020
So shocked that I didn't enjoy this book. The main character was was very deluded and the main man was an ass hole to say the least. It also ended in a strange place where the story was kind of left in the middle of nowhere where nothing had been resolved. Very shocked I didn't love this as I have loved all of Kathy's work so far but this definitely wasn't her best work.
October 4, 2024
i only kept reading this terrible book because every time i finished a chapter, i thought, "surely, surely it must get better?"
by the end of it i really wasn't expecting anything anymore, but it sort of looked up at the last two chapters, so it gets a star more than i was going to give it.
by the end of it i really wasn't expecting anything anymore, but it sort of looked up at the last two chapters, so it gets a star more than i was going to give it.
September 19, 2019
Some funny lines. Far too much drongo.
June 26, 2022
Can we bring back the word pukesvile?
Pierce is the worst but Tasha is a slay.
Pierce is the worst but Tasha is a slay.
Want to read
April 18, 2019from my Picador box set of 10
Displaying 1 - 25 of 25 reviews