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The Practice of Spiritual Direction
The Classic Work on Helping People Become Closer to God Fathers Barry and Connolly see the work of spiritual direction as helping people to develop their relationship with God. In thinking and practice they have absorbed the insights of modern psychotherapy, but have not been absorbed by them. This highly practical book reflects the authors' experience at the Center for Religious Development in Cambridge, Massachusetts, where spiritual direction is available and where directors are trained.
212 pages, Paperback
First published April 1, 1982
233 people are currently reading
427 people want to read
About the author
William A. Barry
43 books34 followersWilliam (Bill) Barry, a distinguished spiritual director and author, was born in Worchester, MA. He entered the Society of Jesus in 1950, studied philosophy in Germany from 1953 until 1956, and was at Weston College for theology studies from 1959 until 1963. Ordained a priest in 1962, Barry went on to earn a Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of Michigan in 1968.
In 1969, he began teaching psychology at Weston School of Theology, Cambridge, MA, and in 1971 was named director for the Center for Religious Development. He served in both capacities until 1978, when he was put in charge of formation for the New England Jesuit Province. Barry was the Assistant Director of Novices for the Province (1985-88) when he was named Rector of Boston College.
From 1991 to 1997, he served as Provincial of the New England Jesuits. Following that, he was named co-director of the Jesuit Tertianship Program. Barry directs retreats at Campion Center in Weston, MA.
Despite such a busy and committed life, Barry found the time to write 15 books, including The Practice of Spiritual Direction, God and You, Finding God in All Things, Spiritual Direction and the Encounter with God, Who Do You Say I Am?, With an Everlasting Love, and A Friendship Like No Other.
Barry has the rare ability to present complex spiritual issues in clear, well-written prose. He is one of the most influential Ignatian commentators at work today.
In 1969, he began teaching psychology at Weston School of Theology, Cambridge, MA, and in 1971 was named director for the Center for Religious Development. He served in both capacities until 1978, when he was put in charge of formation for the New England Jesuit Province. Barry was the Assistant Director of Novices for the Province (1985-88) when he was named Rector of Boston College.
From 1991 to 1997, he served as Provincial of the New England Jesuits. Following that, he was named co-director of the Jesuit Tertianship Program. Barry directs retreats at Campion Center in Weston, MA.
Despite such a busy and committed life, Barry found the time to write 15 books, including The Practice of Spiritual Direction, God and You, Finding God in All Things, Spiritual Direction and the Encounter with God, Who Do You Say I Am?, With an Everlasting Love, and A Friendship Like No Other.
Barry has the rare ability to present complex spiritual issues in clear, well-written prose. He is one of the most influential Ignatian commentators at work today.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews
January 2, 2024
I've read or surveyed many texts on spiritual direction, but this one ranks near the top. Insightful, clear and penetrating. I will keep this close at hand in the future.
October 31, 2023
Very rich. A bit technical at times but also extremely practical
September 12, 2019
In Barry & Connolly’s Practice of Spiritual Direction I was struck with encouragement that spiritual directors should possess a kind of love the authors called a “surplus of warmth” in order to foster relationships with the various personalities and life circumstances. I appreciated the additional insight to that surplus of warmth as the three attitudes: commitment, effort to understand, and spontaneity. The attitude of spontaneity as defined by the authors felt especially encouraging to me as I’ve wondered about what it means to be myself in relation to those I direct:
“Spontaneity means that spiritual directors are themselves, not controlled and inhibited by their role as spiritual directors, but able to express their own feelings, thoughts, and hopes when expressing them will be helpful to directees. Without spontaneity, ‘commitment and effort to understand will appear cold, impersonal, and stereotyped’.”
Another favorite quotation that describes so well the qualities of a spiritual director that I’d hope to describe me:
“The kinds of men and women most likely to engender trust in others are those described in the same study as developed persons. They are not perfect, but they are relatively mature. They show signs of having engaged in life and with people. They are optimistic, but not naive, good-humored, but not glad-handers. They have suffered, but not been overcome by suffering. They have loved and been loved and know the struggle of trying to be a friend to another. They have friends for whom they care deeply. They have experienced failure and sinfulness - their own and others' - but seem at ease with themselves in a way that indicates an experience of being saved and freed by a power greater than the power of failure and sin. They are relatively unafraid of life with all its light and darkness, all its mystery.”
Barry and Connolly offered some helpful insight into the realm of entering into prayer with those who may experience God, prayer, church, and spirituality in ways that differ from my own experience. They recommend that spiritual directors possess a knowledge of diverse Christian religious experiences in a posture of empathy and awareness of non-Christian religious experiences in order to “transcend...personal absolutes” and remain open to a “sense of wonder” toward the capability of God to communicate with people through a variety of experience.
In this way, I’m becoming less fearful of the more abstract terms I’ve read in my study of spiritual direction. For example, the following explanation of God as Mystery felt helpful to me:
“The Mystery we call God is just that - mystery; not mystery in the sense of an unknown, but eventually knowable, stranger, but mystery in the sense that God is too rich, too deep, and too loving to be knowable and is, therefore, God. Spiritual directors can be only helping companions to those who travel the way of such a God.”
Another paragraph I found especially helpful as I consider offering spiritual direction as a wife of a parish priest was Barry and Connolly’s description of “working alliances” and “conflicting loyalties” in chapter 9.
“Spiritual direction, therefore, explicitly acknowledges what is often only implicit in other forms of pastoral care: that the directees' desire for more life, more integration, more union with God is grounded in the indwelling Spirit and that God is an active Other in the relationship. The working alliance is thus grounded in mystery and explicitly acknowledges that the way, too, is mystery.”
“Spontaneity means that spiritual directors are themselves, not controlled and inhibited by their role as spiritual directors, but able to express their own feelings, thoughts, and hopes when expressing them will be helpful to directees. Without spontaneity, ‘commitment and effort to understand will appear cold, impersonal, and stereotyped’.”
Another favorite quotation that describes so well the qualities of a spiritual director that I’d hope to describe me:
“The kinds of men and women most likely to engender trust in others are those described in the same study as developed persons. They are not perfect, but they are relatively mature. They show signs of having engaged in life and with people. They are optimistic, but not naive, good-humored, but not glad-handers. They have suffered, but not been overcome by suffering. They have loved and been loved and know the struggle of trying to be a friend to another. They have friends for whom they care deeply. They have experienced failure and sinfulness - their own and others' - but seem at ease with themselves in a way that indicates an experience of being saved and freed by a power greater than the power of failure and sin. They are relatively unafraid of life with all its light and darkness, all its mystery.”
Barry and Connolly offered some helpful insight into the realm of entering into prayer with those who may experience God, prayer, church, and spirituality in ways that differ from my own experience. They recommend that spiritual directors possess a knowledge of diverse Christian religious experiences in a posture of empathy and awareness of non-Christian religious experiences in order to “transcend...personal absolutes” and remain open to a “sense of wonder” toward the capability of God to communicate with people through a variety of experience.
In this way, I’m becoming less fearful of the more abstract terms I’ve read in my study of spiritual direction. For example, the following explanation of God as Mystery felt helpful to me:
“The Mystery we call God is just that - mystery; not mystery in the sense of an unknown, but eventually knowable, stranger, but mystery in the sense that God is too rich, too deep, and too loving to be knowable and is, therefore, God. Spiritual directors can be only helping companions to those who travel the way of such a God.”
Another paragraph I found especially helpful as I consider offering spiritual direction as a wife of a parish priest was Barry and Connolly’s description of “working alliances” and “conflicting loyalties” in chapter 9.
“Spiritual direction, therefore, explicitly acknowledges what is often only implicit in other forms of pastoral care: that the directees' desire for more life, more integration, more union with God is grounded in the indwelling Spirit and that God is an active Other in the relationship. The working alliance is thus grounded in mystery and explicitly acknowledges that the way, too, is mystery.”
October 4, 2020
Ch. 2
"In the modern world where unbelief has become or is rapidly becoming 'the natural and normative condition,'believers have two options. One is to retreat into smaller and smaller ghettos of 'true believers; who reinforce one another's 'beleaguered faith.' The other is, for the Christian, to go too the heart of Christianity. (For those of other faiths it is to go to the heart of their faith.) That heart is the. experience in faith, hope, and love that Jesus is my savior and the world's and that I want to respond to him." (18)
Ch. 3
"Spiritual direction is help with the development of one's relationship with God.... Directors do not create relationships between God and their directs; they try to foster such relationships." (31)
Ch. 4
"What does a spiritual director do?" (1) empathetic listening (2) paying attention (3) affirming (4) assisting in clarification (5) raising questions when the direct wants them, and (6) helping the direct to recognize the affective attitudes that influence his or her attitude to God. (47)
In learning to contemplate God: "They would benefit more from spending time at first in some activity they enjoy that has a contemplative aspect to it." (53)
Ch. 6
"Traditional Christian teaching on spiritual life has often spoken of movements of the spirits. In his Rules for the Discernment of Spirits, Ignatius of Loyola describes characteristic movements of the 'good spirit' and the evil spirit.' A major props of the 'evil spirit' is to thwart the movements of the 'good spirit' toward God." (86)
"Since God is semper maior - always greater - one can expect that relating to God will mean being open to continuous novelty and thus continuous change of images. Spiritual idolatry could be seen as the unwillingness to let God be other than one's present image." (93)
"Resistances often crystallize around some kind of secret: There is something I don't want God, or my director - or frequently enough, myself - to know about. The resistance begins to occur when the 'secret' gets close to the surface of awareness." (104)
"Directors should use direct and nontechnical words with people." (106)
Ch. 7
"If we recognize that discernment is, infamy, nothing more than being able to recognize and admit differences, we can appreciate both its simplicity and its value." (109)
"Often enough, such dullness and distance occur (in prayer) because important affective attitudes are not being expressed." (111)
(In prayer) "Ignatius is not alarmed at the prospect of sadness or upset; it is unruffled self-possession that bothers him." (113)
Conclusion
"Those who are familiar with the Exercises often speak of a 'First Week' or a 'Second Week' dynamic. In a language that seems more clearly expressive of the actual experience of retreat ants, we would refer to the 'First Week' dynamic as that stage when directs are desirers of, and struggling against, God's willingness to love and save them, warts and all. the great achievement of this dynamic is the freedom to receive love, salvation, forgiveness from God. The 'Second Week dynamic represents the struggle of Christians to take on the values of Jesus, identify with him, and care for what he cares for. the achievement is companionships with Jesus, their freedom to give or to serve as Jesus gave and served." (206)
"In the modern world where unbelief has become or is rapidly becoming 'the natural and normative condition,'believers have two options. One is to retreat into smaller and smaller ghettos of 'true believers; who reinforce one another's 'beleaguered faith.' The other is, for the Christian, to go too the heart of Christianity. (For those of other faiths it is to go to the heart of their faith.) That heart is the. experience in faith, hope, and love that Jesus is my savior and the world's and that I want to respond to him." (18)
Ch. 3
"Spiritual direction is help with the development of one's relationship with God.... Directors do not create relationships between God and their directs; they try to foster such relationships." (31)
Ch. 4
"What does a spiritual director do?" (1) empathetic listening (2) paying attention (3) affirming (4) assisting in clarification (5) raising questions when the direct wants them, and (6) helping the direct to recognize the affective attitudes that influence his or her attitude to God. (47)
In learning to contemplate God: "They would benefit more from spending time at first in some activity they enjoy that has a contemplative aspect to it." (53)
Ch. 6
"Traditional Christian teaching on spiritual life has often spoken of movements of the spirits. In his Rules for the Discernment of Spirits, Ignatius of Loyola describes characteristic movements of the 'good spirit' and the evil spirit.' A major props of the 'evil spirit' is to thwart the movements of the 'good spirit' toward God." (86)
"Since God is semper maior - always greater - one can expect that relating to God will mean being open to continuous novelty and thus continuous change of images. Spiritual idolatry could be seen as the unwillingness to let God be other than one's present image." (93)
"Resistances often crystallize around some kind of secret: There is something I don't want God, or my director - or frequently enough, myself - to know about. The resistance begins to occur when the 'secret' gets close to the surface of awareness." (104)
"Directors should use direct and nontechnical words with people." (106)
Ch. 7
"If we recognize that discernment is, infamy, nothing more than being able to recognize and admit differences, we can appreciate both its simplicity and its value." (109)
"Often enough, such dullness and distance occur (in prayer) because important affective attitudes are not being expressed." (111)
(In prayer) "Ignatius is not alarmed at the prospect of sadness or upset; it is unruffled self-possession that bothers him." (113)
Conclusion
"Those who are familiar with the Exercises often speak of a 'First Week' or a 'Second Week' dynamic. In a language that seems more clearly expressive of the actual experience of retreat ants, we would refer to the 'First Week' dynamic as that stage when directs are desirers of, and struggling against, God's willingness to love and save them, warts and all. the great achievement of this dynamic is the freedom to receive love, salvation, forgiveness from God. The 'Second Week dynamic represents the struggle of Christians to take on the values of Jesus, identify with him, and care for what he cares for. the achievement is companionships with Jesus, their freedom to give or to serve as Jesus gave and served." (206)
August 23, 2017
Short Review: I am considering going to formal training to become a spiritual director. Because I am who I am, I decided to read widely about spiritual direction as part of the decision making process.
This is a classic (originally published in 1982). The authors are Catholic, but it is widely ecumenical in language and approach. The first two chapters are describing what spiritual direction is and what is supposed to accomplish. The rest is instruction for spiritual directors. This is the most helpful book written for spiritual directors I have read so far.
A slightly longer review is on my blog http://bookwi.se/the-practice-of-spir...
This is a classic (originally published in 1982). The authors are Catholic, but it is widely ecumenical in language and approach. The first two chapters are describing what spiritual direction is and what is supposed to accomplish. The rest is instruction for spiritual directors. This is the most helpful book written for spiritual directors I have read so far.
A slightly longer review is on my blog http://bookwi.se/the-practice-of-spir...
June 20, 2021
If this book wasn’t required reading for my training program, I wouldn’t have read it. It took me nearly three months to finish it, but I did find the last section to be the best section. There was a lot of repetition from other books in the first two sections, but I did find the description of a director and directee as being in an alliance together a good one.
Not a book I would recommend but ultimately useful.
Not a book I would recommend but ultimately useful.
June 5, 2020
"Spiritual direction is a helping relationship, but the help offered is more like that of a companion on a journey than of an expert who, before the journey begins, advises what roads to take and answers the travelers questions" (145).
In this now classic book, Jesuit authors William Barry and William Connolly offer a very good overview of the practice and challenge of spiritual direction. They cover a lot of ground - from the centrality of religious experience in Christianity today to the importance of regular supervision for the individual spiritual director (and everything in between). This book is accessible and useful; it can be read as an introduction for those considering spiritual direction, a manual for those undergoing training in spiritual direction, and a guide for seasoned practitioners in the art of spiritual direction.
In "The Practice of Spiritual Direction" the authors reiterate one thing over and over again: spiritual direction is focused on the directee's personal relationship with God experienced affectively through prayer. This is not counseling; it does not seek to resolve a directee's personal problems one by one or help him or her to come to grips with dark secrets and twisted childhoods. Problems will be dealt with and issues will be overcome, but only through the relation between God and the directee. A spiritual director is not present to give advice, teaching, or solutions. He or she is not a psychoanalyst on the one hand or a guru on the other hand. A director is like a midwife, drawing out from each directee that which already exists. As a midwife, a director asks provocative questions that reach to the heart and allow a directee to manifest thoughts, feelings, and desires directly to God.
I read this as part of a spiritual direction training program. While not as eminently practical and useful as Maureen Conroy's work, this serves as a very necessary overview and foundation for the practice.
In this now classic book, Jesuit authors William Barry and William Connolly offer a very good overview of the practice and challenge of spiritual direction. They cover a lot of ground - from the centrality of religious experience in Christianity today to the importance of regular supervision for the individual spiritual director (and everything in between). This book is accessible and useful; it can be read as an introduction for those considering spiritual direction, a manual for those undergoing training in spiritual direction, and a guide for seasoned practitioners in the art of spiritual direction.
In "The Practice of Spiritual Direction" the authors reiterate one thing over and over again: spiritual direction is focused on the directee's personal relationship with God experienced affectively through prayer. This is not counseling; it does not seek to resolve a directee's personal problems one by one or help him or her to come to grips with dark secrets and twisted childhoods. Problems will be dealt with and issues will be overcome, but only through the relation between God and the directee. A spiritual director is not present to give advice, teaching, or solutions. He or she is not a psychoanalyst on the one hand or a guru on the other hand. A director is like a midwife, drawing out from each directee that which already exists. As a midwife, a director asks provocative questions that reach to the heart and allow a directee to manifest thoughts, feelings, and desires directly to God.
I read this as part of a spiritual direction training program. While not as eminently practical and useful as Maureen Conroy's work, this serves as a very necessary overview and foundation for the practice.
December 10, 2017
I have begun a new position this year, and in that role I am able to offer some spiritual direction to the team members that I work with, and my own spiritual director suggested this book as a helpful and exemplary introduction into the practice. I found it to be just that! Although at times it leaned a bit on the formal and/or instructional side (particularly the beginning, which introduced the history of spiritual direction, and the final chapters that were focused on the elements of the relationships directors have with directees and supervisors), I largely found this book to be really richly written. I was grateful for the attention to beauty that seemed to carry through, subtle but still present and in that way elevating it from being a more straightforward read. I found a great deal of wisdom within its pages that have not only been formative for helping me to understand and shape my fledgling practice of offering spiritual direction to others, but also on a personal level deepened and enlivened my own spiritual life.
July 6, 2024
This book seems very dated. I spent some time in the Jesuits and experienced the type of spiritual direction promoted by the authors. I fully agree with the authors’ proposal that spiritual directors be companions of the directees, and that a contemplative attitude should govern the relationship. But I strongly disagree with the belief that the Director should be nonjudgmental. Companions are judgmental. People in a relationship are judgmental. If there is no judgment, there is no relationship - only sentimentalism. Sentimentalism leads to a spiritual void. It is easy to be a nonjudgmental spiritual director. You are not going to offend anyone by being nonjudgmental; however, you are also not going to help anyone find the Lord. Jesus was judgmental. I depend on my spouse and friends to be judgmental and to hold me accountable and for the same reason they likewise depend on me to be judgmental. History has not been kind to the nonjudgmental spiritual direction espoused by the authors. I saw and experienced firsthand how it lead to the collapse of spiritual formation.
September 8, 2019
Barry and Connolly do a wonderful job diving deeper into the idea of leading someone into finding God in their experiences and using those discoveries to develop one's union with him. This is a must read for anyone wanting to become a spiritual direction, seeing as how our authors clearly line out who a spiritual director is and who a spiritual director is not. Utilizing a variety of ancient Christian writings, psychoanalytic philosophy, and modern experiences, Barry and Connolly show their education and expertise throughout every page. I will warn you. This is not a book to discover "format" for one-on-one or group scenarios. It is a "why" book and not a "how". Thus, this book is not to be taken by itself, but instead can be the field lines in which the game is played, so to speak.
July 6, 2021
3.5. My goal is to read all of the varied perspectives and philosophies on Spiritual Direction. Though SD is not only a Christian practice, this is an explicitly Christian book. The authors do give a nod occasionally to the experiences of others in different traditions, and stress the trust in God inherent in sitting with someone as a companion. Barry and Connolly have a lot of good things to say, especially in the latter half of the book when they get into the interpersonal dynamics of the SD relationship.
September 22, 2023
Read as required reading for a spiritual formation course I was doing, it's not an especially long book by page count, but it is long by virtue of being absolutely packed with ideas and information. There's a lot of interesting stuff in here, even if you weren't looking to it as a kind of text book, on the fascinating subject of the contemplative life. I've used words and phrases like 'required reading', 'information', 'text book' and 'subject'. But as the authors emphasise, in the end the taught foundations need to open out to and support mystery, depth and experience.
March 9, 2022
It’s a basic text for those hoping to become Spiritual Directors, or even just hoping to know more about the process.
Though, I think the book shows it’s age a bit by referring to theologians of the 1960s-80s as “modern” thinkers.
Direction, and Supervision of directors, is discussed almost clinically… which helps in learning but makes it seem formulaic; which they say is anything but since every directing relationship is different.
Though, I think the book shows it’s age a bit by referring to theologians of the 1960s-80s as “modern” thinkers.
Direction, and Supervision of directors, is discussed almost clinically… which helps in learning but makes it seem formulaic; which they say is anything but since every directing relationship is different.
January 15, 2023
One of the required reads for my spiritual direction program, I found this one hard to get into at first but the last sections of the book were most helpful: on the relationship between the spiritual director and the directee with an exploration of transference and counter-transference and on the ways supervision can help address blind spots/obstacles and thereby deepen the director's own relationship with God.
May 14, 2024
A primer in Spiritual Direction. I began reading thinking this was written from a non-Catholic yet Christian perspective but was happy to note that it is authored by two Jesuits. The book offers an interesting introduction to the practice of spiritual direction. It offers foundations and presents some guidelines. Obviously, a very good book for those engaging in spiritual direction and for those training to be spiritual directors.
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December 12, 2025Jeg møtte på ignaciansk veiledning på et retreat på Sandom høsten 2021. Jeg har lenge vært opptatt av Ignacius og jesuittene, og skaffet denne boka i norsk oversettelse (Efrem forlag) for å få innblikk i hva som ligger bak denne veiledningen. Kanskje jeg kan være til hjelp for noen en gang i framtida? Men boka bidro i alle fall til at jeg har respekt for en slik oppgave, det er godt mulig at det ikke er noe for meg.
October 31, 2021
Really solid theoretical intro to spiritual direction. This book did a great job defining terms and getting to the heart of the purpose of direction- facilitating a deeper relationship with the Lord. I'm especially thankful for the chapter on contemplative life. Even though this book is a bit dated, I still found plenty of relevant insight here.
August 30, 2023
An insightful book that I read when beginning my training as a spiritual director. I appreciated the practicality and depth of this book. It was easy to read and immerse myself in (when compared to some of the heavier texts we read). I underlined quite a bit and will be returning to these pages in the future.
February 1, 2022
Excellent book on the nuances of Spiritual Direction, but it is a dense read which means you'd want to sit with it and consider the information carefully. It provides excellent definitions of the purpose of spiritual direction for the director and as a directee.
October 20, 2022
The book is, without a doubt, one of the most profound works I’ve ever come across. What a fascinating theme, practice, and methodology envisioned here. Christ, help us to pursue you and guide others into all truth and life.
April 12, 2023
Great summary of what is really important in SD but sometimes it felt a bit too dry and academic. I plan to type up a brief summary of the main points to help me keep the really important things front and center as I work with directees.
September 4, 2017
Deeply thoughtful and practical. Focused on the specifics of spiritual direction as it's one unique ministry, but very applicable to all pastoral care. All pastors ought to read this one.
May 12, 2018
So many thoughts. I will be delving into this.
January 10, 2019
Top shelf. Written by people who have had long experience in the work of spiritual direction. Realistic and frank; it feels as if the authors have nothing to prove.
August 29, 2019
A Solid Blend
Great mix of history, theory and practice of spiritual direction. Appreciated the fictionalized dialogues as a means to contrast different approaches.
Great mix of history, theory and practice of spiritual direction. Appreciated the fictionalized dialogues as a means to contrast different approaches.
March 20, 2020
Very hulpful and stimulating
This book is very helpful and stimulating to a beginning spiritual director like me. It provides a mirror to reflect on, and grow in one's experience.
This book is very helpful and stimulating to a beginning spiritual director like me. It provides a mirror to reflect on, and grow in one's experience.
June 22, 2020
Very helpful overview on the practice of spiritual direction within the framework of a Christian worldview.
April 30, 2021
The first chapter or two were difficult because it was more theory. The rest of the book is very helpful though for how to deepen your relationship with God and help others do this.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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September 12, 2021Fantastic resource for everyone accompanying others in their walk with God.
November 11, 2021
Helpful for reflecting as a spiritual director
Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews