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Spine Slaughter
On a warm summer's day the village of Wincing On Thames is attacked by the most unlikely of monsters. Hoards of deadly hedgehogs are on the loose and out for blood. Can ASBO wielding Jason and his friends survive the onslaught? ... Warning: This story contains gore, profanity and gratuitous nudity. There's a children's tea party at the beginning though, so something for everyone, I think.
51 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 10, 2010
78 people want to read
About the author
Nick Spalding
37 books1,398 followersNick Spalding is an author who, try as he might, can't seem to write anything serious.
Before becoming a full-time author, he worked in the communications industry, mainly in media and marketing. As talking rubbish for a living can get tiresome (for anyone other than a politician), he thought he'd have a crack at writing comedy fiction - with a very agreeable level of success so far, it has to be said. Nick is now a multimillion seller. This flabbergasts him every single day.
Nick is now in his fifties - and is rather annoyed at the universe about it, because it gave him no choice in the matter. He's also addicted to Thai food and roast potatoes (not together), loves Batman and Warhammer, and has a dreadful singing voice.
***
Find out more about Nick and his books at www.nickspalding.com
Before becoming a full-time author, he worked in the communications industry, mainly in media and marketing. As talking rubbish for a living can get tiresome (for anyone other than a politician), he thought he'd have a crack at writing comedy fiction - with a very agreeable level of success so far, it has to be said. Nick is now a multimillion seller. This flabbergasts him every single day.
Nick is now in his fifties - and is rather annoyed at the universe about it, because it gave him no choice in the matter. He's also addicted to Thai food and roast potatoes (not together), loves Batman and Warhammer, and has a dreadful singing voice.
***
Find out more about Nick and his books at www.nickspalding.com
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
September 4, 2011
Truly and utterly ridiculous. Those are the words that come to mind when thinking about describing the short story that is “Spine Slaughter.” Even the author himself states that this story may be the most ridiculous thing you have ever read.
I would even go one step further and state that “Spine Slaughter” is unique. I’ve read a lot of horror and a lot of short stories, but NEVER have I come across a tale quite like this. I mean, how Spalding even came up with the idea of turning the gentle and almost useless hedgehog into a ravenous creature of terror, I have no idea.
It’s also no very common I laugh in the middle of reading a book. Spalding changed that for me too. Obviously this a very British book and the humor is drier than the Sahara desert, but I’d be lying if I said it weren’t funny. I don’t want to give any lines away because that would ruin both the timing and the hilariousness of the jokes, but trust me when I say, Spalding knows how to meld humor and horror together like no other.
Of course, as I always say with short stories that are this amazing: “Slaughter” was way too short. I spent only 20 minutes reading this and before I knew it, it was over. I suppose making it any longer would cause this short story to loose some of its craziness and complete lack of seriousness, but it’s written so well and it’s so flat out stupidly good, that it’s hard to not want more.
Still, I loved every minute I spent laughing and cringing (usually at the same time) along with this one. Totally worth your time!
I would even go one step further and state that “Spine Slaughter” is unique. I’ve read a lot of horror and a lot of short stories, but NEVER have I come across a tale quite like this. I mean, how Spalding even came up with the idea of turning the gentle and almost useless hedgehog into a ravenous creature of terror, I have no idea.
It’s also no very common I laugh in the middle of reading a book. Spalding changed that for me too. Obviously this a very British book and the humor is drier than the Sahara desert, but I’d be lying if I said it weren’t funny. I don’t want to give any lines away because that would ruin both the timing and the hilariousness of the jokes, but trust me when I say, Spalding knows how to meld humor and horror together like no other.
Of course, as I always say with short stories that are this amazing: “Slaughter” was way too short. I spent only 20 minutes reading this and before I knew it, it was over. I suppose making it any longer would cause this short story to loose some of its craziness and complete lack of seriousness, but it’s written so well and it’s so flat out stupidly good, that it’s hard to not want more.
Still, I loved every minute I spent laughing and cringing (usually at the same time) along with this one. Totally worth your time!
November 8, 2011
I kept thinking of an army of maniacal Sonic The Hedgehogs while reading this story and chuckling. The author says in the foreword not to take this seriously and I don't see how any reader could. It reminded me stylistically of some bizarro fiction I've read so that's the category I used.
I don't often think a short story I've finished should be shorter but I think with humor especially there's a point when the joke starts getting stale. About halfway through this one I felt Crazy Sonic had run his course.
Still, a fairly humorous read.
I don't often think a short story I've finished should be shorter but I think with humor especially there's a point when the joke starts getting stale. About halfway through this one I felt Crazy Sonic had run his course.
Still, a fairly humorous read.
August 1, 2011
Hedgehogs run amok in this spine tingling giggle-fest. It is a strangely schizophrenic short story trying to make up its mind whether to be a teenager's idea of a B-movie horror story or an adult's idea of a silly romp. A lot of fun, but I thought it had rather a sudden, unsatisfactory ending.
April 13, 2012
This is a 10 minute, (yes TEN minute) kindle read.
Mindless, ridiculous, misogynistic puerile nonsense..... Loved it!
Was free (now .49p) on Amazon so thought why not.
Probably best to wait for it to freebie again.
Mindless, ridiculous, misogynistic puerile nonsense..... Loved it!
Was free (now .49p) on Amazon so thought why not.
Probably best to wait for it to freebie again.
October 23, 2016
This was a short yet entertaining tale of hedgehogs going mad and slaughtering everybody in a small British town. The author didn't spend any time explaining how or why the critters went mad, just jumped right into the visceral action! Fun!
July 14, 2011
I haven't read something so smart, so funny, and so stupid all at the same time.
July 20, 2011
VERY VERY FUNNY and SILLY.
This is a short story about man-eating hedgehogs - what more can I say.
Free on amazon kindle at the moment and I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK.
This is a short story about man-eating hedgehogs - what more can I say.
Free on amazon kindle at the moment and I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK.
July 25, 2011
Weird but gave me a giggle
April 27, 2015
This story is a delight of humor and absurdity. I totally loved it. Reading this short story was the best 45 minutes I've spent today. I will definitely check out more from Nick Spalding.
August 3, 2011
Incredibly daft and quite entertaining.
August 14, 2011
Killer hedgehogs! Good, silly story.
September 3, 2011
Hahaha, so ridiculous and funny!
September 1, 2011
At times, this was laugh out loud funny - think Mr Spalding has a future in comedy...
October 11, 2011
This book was funny. A great fun book. It was short, fast and a good laugh.
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September 19, 2018I’ve put this as ‘Read’ as I simply cannot find it for sale anywhere; should any of my friends read this and you have it, please let me know ! 😢
Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews