The Fruit of Her Hands: Respect and the Christian Woman

by Nancy Wilson

Imagine where the Church would be today if the men in it were respected as they ought to be by their wives. What power would God unleash through godly men who were respected in their homes? In this short book, Nancy Wilson exhorts wives to stop focusing on their husbands' problems and shortcomings and to look at their own responsibilities and learn the contentment which the Bible continually exhorts us to. This book is part of the Canon Press series of books on the family, which has helped many people trying to deal with the on the ground messes that come with sinners living under the same roof. This book on marriage for women reminds us to keep our eyes fixed on what the Bible defines as our duties and not on the modern lies which flatter us.

Genres: Marriage, Christian, Nonfiction, Family, Christian Living, Christianity, Theology

114 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 1, 1997

About the author

Nancy Wilson (née Greensides) is the wife of Pastor Douglas Wilson, mother of N.D. Wilson, Rebekah Merkle, and Rachel Jankovic, and grandmother of seventeen who are (as yet) unpublished. She lives in northern Idaho.

Reviews

[Caitlin]

I highly respect Nancy Wilson and enjoy some of her podcasts, but I felt this book heaped a load of commands on the heads of Christian women and added unbiblical ideas to the biblical idea of the husband being the head. I for sure gleaned some good tips and reminders as a woman, and the book spurred on some good conversation, but I would never encourage anyone to read this.

[Samantha · Rating 1 out of 5]

I don't even know how to begin to review this book.Rotten fruit. I honestly couldn't believe some of the archaic thinking that I read in this book. I agree with the premise of respecting one's husband, but the "all women belong in the home"/ "women can't have their own ministry, but must be under their husband's" mentality of the author left a bad taste in my mouth.

[Becky Pliego · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful. I love how biblical and practical Nancy Wilson's book is.
Full review on my IG account: https://www.instagram.com/tv/CKpU6P6h...

[Leah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ahhh so I feel like some chapters were a solid 5. really good chapters for me to think through especially in my own marriage, but then some chapters were a 2 or a 3 rating. I can see how this book could be pretty polarizing and while I don't necessarily disagree with the things she says, I also feel like some things aren't as black and white. She writes more from a practical approach-- which can be helpful, but obviously won't touch up on every possible scenario out there. I'd say for women to read it, but read it with discerning eyes! Don't get too bogged down on the details, but the overall picture is worth thinking through

[Katlin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was directed more toward women who were already wives and mothers, but it still gave me, an unmarried young woman, quite a bit to think about and apply. I think that one of the most valuable aspects of the book was that it showed me that the trials and temptations I struggle with now are ever present in the life of a Christian woman. The attitudes I foster about the things I now face will really effect how my marriage and child rearing will go. I get a head start! And if I don't begin to work on my character now I'll just have that much more to work on later. Now there were a few points that I would disagree with the author on, but I found so much helpful information throughout the book. I would say that this one is a keeper.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nancy's advice is biblical and refreshing as always.

[Leanne · Rating 3 out of 5]

This wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I liked what the author had to say about submission and respecting your husband. I didn't agree with the idea that a wife cannot have any ministry or employment that is distinct from her husband, but the author presented her case and gave backup for it, so it was thought-provoking none the less.

A few off the cuff remarks made me wince... like fears are simply sin because of not trusting God enough. To me, that falls into the same category as saying that if you're sick, it's because there is sin in your life. Rubbish!

There was more that I shook my head at, and if I were to rate this book solely on the basis of what I agreed with, I would have rated it lower. I rated it as I did because it made me think, which is more than I can say for a lot of the books out there!

[Katie Bolhous · Rating 5 out of 5]

extremely good. ground in biblical truths with practical applications. what a high calling it is to be a wife! and how often i take it lightly! highly recommend.

[Abigail Weaver · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read. Nancy Wilson is precise, perceptive, challenging and encouraging at the same time. She does a great job handling temptations and challenges specific to women by providing Biblical wisdom and insight into how to be a God honoring and fulfilled wife and mother. Although the book is written to married ladies, Mrs. Wilson provides practical wisdom to women in all walks of life. I especially appreciate how she cuts through preconceived ideas and assumptions and challenges us to realize fully our created purpose and potential.

[Bianca Hosking · Rating 4 out of 5]

The chapter on principles and methods was brilliant and was something I NEEDED to hear as a young wife who often falls into the trap of comparison often. If I could, I would almost put it earlier in the book. Personal preference but I feel like it ended on a random note without tying it all together, but still good :)

[Kevin Godinho · Rating 3 out of 5]

Audiobook. My wife has read all of Nancy's books and loves them. I listened to this on Canon+, and it was really good. There isn't anything extremely profound here. It's just biblical headship from a woman's perspective. Nancy does a good job of being an older woman who is teaching younger women how to be women of the Word.

[Jordan Treece · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was fine. Not for me, since it's directed towards women, which isn't a problem. And probably because of that, I don't really have much else to say about it.

[Mary A · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great little book, one that only took a few hours to read but had so many deep thoughts in it that I will need to come back to it again and again. I found this book very challenging in the best way possible. Nancy pointed out sins I didn't even realize that I had but now they seem so obvious. And she doesn't just focus on sins of outward appearance; this isn't just one woman's list of personal rules-- they are sins of the heart, based on God's word. Having her example as a godly older woman really makes me feel like it is possible and, what's more, hopeful that God will work on these sins as I give them up to him. I feel excited about how God can change me in my marriage and family, and this conviction was the first step.

I especially liked the chapter on not confusing "principles" vs. "methods". I think this concept will prove to be very helpful as I wade through all the choices that a young mother has to make, and ensuring I don't ruin my friendships in the process. I also learned a lot about what it means to respect my husband, which is so important because the world we live in is so anti-respect; I realized that my version of respect isn't quite up to God's standard, yet.

Nancy is an extremely challenging and convicting writer, and that is something that all young women need in their lives. I am thankful for this book and her ministry.

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

There's enough convicting points in this book to last any wife a lifetime, and yet it's a short read. Wilson isn't flowery in her writing. She simply presents the case, backs it up with Scripture, and says "go and do likewise." I will be using this book in counseling other women, and as a regular refresher for my own life and marriage. Wilson covers many aspects of marriage that most writers are afraid to broach because of the hostile, feminist culture in which we live: respecting your husband, being a "keeper at home", cultivating a quiet spirit, etc. It's a great read, but only if you're looking to change yourself, not your husband. Four stars, only because the writing is a bit choppy. Content wise, I give it five stars.

[Bambi Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one I should probably read yearly and I wish I had read it years ago. It explains a wife’s submission so beautifully but the book touches on many other areas of Christian womanhood. No fluff here, just straightforward truth.

[Marliss Bombardier · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a difficult book to read--very convicting. I agreed with it all.

[Samantha Williamson · Rating 1 out of 5]

i miss the person i was before i read this because literally wth

[Brooke Chessum · Rating 4 out of 5]

I appreciated this little book more than I anticipated. I so appreciate her straight to the point sections (without droning on in anecdotes) and the at times overly simplistic approach of bringing many aspects of life as a married woman back to the basics of scripture. It is limited in its scope, as all complicated situations must be handled with wisdom and discernment and we can’t just slap a verse or passage from a book on it. But overall we do have a high and uncomfortable at times (as we fight the flesh) calling as wives. This book and much of scripture is quite countercultural. I love her sections on respecting your husband, prioritizing biblical principles over methods, and avoiding the temptation to be a busybody which is praised even in the church amidst our social media soaked culture. At the end of the day much of our (or lack thereof) application of biblical principles in marriage is a direct result of unbelief that God really means we are to do what He says and this book provides a wonderful reality check for that.

[Cait Hutchison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Enjoyed this. Very practical and speaks on being a woman of God and wife in a God honoring way. Touched honestly on topics many marriage books don’t which I really appreciate. And shed light on what it means to respect the way that God commands us to in His word. Humbling and a lot of it is still applicable now!

“If you are feeling good about your standing before God, because of anything you do, you are not looking to Christ or trusting in him.” 🔥

[Julie Freeman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recommend this book to all wives, mothers, and soon to be wives. Nancy shares so much practical wisdom and gives clear and specific advice to wives in a variety of situations on how they can glorify God by respecting their husbands, loving their children and caring for their homes. Definitely going on my reread list!

P.S. the chapter on "principles & methods" was very encouraging to me as a young mother and helped me work through some fears/shame I've been feeling in a Biblical way.

[Brittany Wolffram · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book packs a good punch! Each chapter alone brings so many practical biblical truths that honor God in our roles as woman while also gives deep insight into what the Bible says as a woman, wife, mother, friend, widow. Any woman at any stage of life should pick up this book and be challenged, encouraged and sharpened.

[Kristin Rogers · Rating 5 out of 5]

I should read this every year

[ᴀᴍʙ · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent primer and Christ-centered read that IMO, every Christian woman should read, married or single. I thank God for this precious gem of a book and for using Nancy Wilson in such an edifying way!

[Lauren Mock · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a swift, convicting kick to the teeth 🥵 must read for Christian women, especially wives

[Shannon · Rating 3 out of 5]

One thing I always really appreciate about the Wilson clan is their unapologetic confidence that what the Bible says is true and for our joy. No pats on the back with "I know it's so hard," but "God is good! He's spoken truth to us for our good! Obeying this will be good!"

That being said, the Gospel is often assumed not preached, so I wouldn't say this is a great intro point for those just beginning their study of the theology of womanhood. It contains some of my pet peeves, such as overgeneralizing about the opposing viewpoint, and it isn't very interested in smooth transitions or overall structure. It's just headings with good solid advice under each one. I'm not even sure how they decided to group some of the headings into chapters.

My best takeaways:

"When we adopt a method, it would be preferable to call it a biblical approach rather than the biblical approach." (60)

"Every form of works-righteousness is rebellious at the bottom. It does not matter if it is tithing spices, or praying on street corners, or home educating or home birthing--if you are feeling good about your standing before God because of anything you are doing, you are not looking to Christ or trusting in Him." (64)

(On our anxiety that we maybe should be doing more)
"One night as I was washing the dishes . . . my mind wandered off. . . . Shouldn't I be leading Bible studies? Shoudln't I be involved in more active evangelism? Couln't I 'disciple' someone? Didn't God want me to do something for Him?
Immediately I realized what He wanted me to do. He wanted me to do the dishes." (75)

[Brian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Why on earth am I reading Nancy Wilson? I'm not the target audience. The explanation is simple: we're putting out a slightly revised version of the Family Series very soon, and I proofed the new edition for errors. So here I am, a fish out of water, and as such if some woman comes up to me and says, "You know, you may like this book, but you didn't understand..." I'll be open minded.

That said, I was encouraged by this little book. A lot of wisdom here, as with Doug's books, and I do need to say, as an insider, that the family is very consistent with what they preach. Nancy knows women temptations to grumble, gossip, and ruminate quite well. A lot of it wasn't my business, really, but the stuff on not introspecting at 11pm was indeed helpful and could have helped me years ago. Anyway, I highly recommend this book.

[Andrea Jardon · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so good. One of the better books I've read in a long time. It has very basic biblical truths about what being a woman of the word looks like in reference to marriage and the role of a woman in her home. I love how simple and straightforward Nancy writes, there's no empty words and fluffiness (is that a word?) to it just plain and simple this is what the Bible says and here's how we must live in obedience to it. I went underlining crazy I nearly underlined the whole book it was so good! I want to re-read it and re-read it and re-read it again! and give all my friends copies!!!

[Leslie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This would be one of those books that you could reread with some frequency and learn something each time. I wish I had have read it several years ago, but I am grateful to have read it now and not continued to have it in my “to be read” stack.

There is a lot of wisdom, a lot of conviction, and a lot of encouragement here. Especially greatful for the chapter on Principles vs Methods and the practical advice when it comes to respect.

[Sara Shipley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I came upon this book in a used book store. I feel like I found a diamond in the rocks. I just got married a little over a year ago, a have been blessed to have Titus 2 woman in my life. I it was easy to take in what Nancy Wilson was writing because it was constantly backed up with scripture.

[Bethanie Brayley · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very good book giving what I see as the beautiful, biblical woman! I appreciate Nancy's boldness, kindness and clarity in expressing things that our culture at large despises. This is a great "refer to" kind of book, and great for discussion with a group.