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Klan-destine Relationships: A Black Man's Odyssey in the Ku Klux Klan

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While marching in a cub-scout parade, young Daryl Davis was pelted by rocks and bottles. As a teenager he was told he would be shipped back to Africa. Driven by an intense need to understand those who hate him because of the colour of his skin, Davis decided to seek out the roots of racism.

The author, who is a professional musician, recounts his courageous, lifelong confrontations and conversations with members of the Ku Klux Klan in an attempt to unearth the roots of bigotry and foster harmony between black and white, often using music to bridge the divide.

315 pages, Hardcover

First published November 15, 1997

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About the author

Daryl Davis

13 books44 followers
Daryl Davis is an American R&B and blues musician, activist, author, actor, and bandleader. His efforts to fight racism, in which, as an African American, he has engaged with members of the Ku Klux Klan, have convinced a number of Klansmen to leave and denounce the KKK.

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5 stars
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52 (31%)
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31 (18%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews
Profile Image for Doug.
Author 6 books8 followers
November 25, 2013
It has been a while since I got captured by a book that I could not put down until it was finished. Daryl Davis is a musician who experienced racism all his life. And so he decided to start meeting leaders of the Ku Klux Klan. He would call (or have his secretary call - he was a successful musician) Klan people to set up meetings, and just forget to mention he was black, and they would be surprised! Woo!

The thing is... they would still talk to him. And they weren't all what he expected. And he started to make friends with them. And he'd attend Klan trials and Klan rallies and it would weird people out when these leaders would greet him friendly by name, and boy howdy we have a book.

One thing you learn right away is that there is no one Ku Klux Klan - there are many splinter groups, some of which are rivals. Some more violent than others. (And yes, he gets to know some hate-crime murderers) There are the white supremacists and the white separatists, and they consider themselves very different.

How do you make friends? You find common ground, and he does find common ground with people who believe Blacks are an inferior species who should all go back to Africa. The Klan members are mostly very anti-drug, as is Daryl. And who doesn't like country music?

I'm writing this review the way I write, which is nothing like he writes, so I'm giving you the wrong impression. The book is sometimes funny, but it isn't a humor-book. It is fascinating. Some of Daryl's new friends change a bit as a result of their relationship, and some don't. But the conversations they have... wow. And it isn't just a bunch of interviews. Things happen. A Klan-friend of Daryl gets arrested on a trumped up charge, just because cops and judges often discriminate against people in the Klan. And the irony does not escape Daryl, although it does escape the Klan member. And if Daryl is friends with the leader of one Klan faction, members of another one don't really take kindly to that.

In some cases - I really do mean "friends." Like socializing, calling on the phone, "how are you, pal?" friends.

Three flaws: One - everyone in the book speaks in a similar voice. Given that I doubt Davis was allowed to tape-record his conversations, I'm assuming that the quotation marks are not to be taken literally, and he is writing dialogue around his memories. So that took some getting used to. Also, the chapters of the last fourth of the book get short and have a little less depth, as if he finished his book, and saw all these post-its and notecards that he forgot to include, so he wrote quick chapters. Still interesting, but weak pacing. Finally, (and I didn't realize this until I was writing the review), while I got to know Klan leaders, it would have been nice if the book was a bit longer and had some more about rank-and-file members. My hunch is that Davis didn't talk to a lot of them; while a leader might be able to get away with talking to a Black person at a restaurant or home, I doubt a regular member would. But still, it would have been interesting.

I am sure people got mad at this book, because we are supposed to think of The Klan as cardboard villains, or (if we are all progressive and liberal) as tragic ignorant manipulated figures. After reading this book, you see them as people, which was really Davis' point, but it puts you in another kind of minority.
Profile Image for Onionboy.
560 reviews2 followers
July 5, 2022
This book was promoted as the story of a black man who personally got 200 people to leave the KKK by individually befriending them. That’s not what I found when I read it. He befriended many people in the KKK and had many honest discussions with them, but I only noticed one person who changed at all and left the KKK because of Daryl. And that was because he saw how Daryl was treated during a court case.
Many people commented about the author’s apparent lack of writing skills. I did not notice this in any way that bothered me. Others commented that they felt the KKK people who met with Daryl were using him to their own end. I wondered about their motivation in meeting with him and telling him so much about the KKK. The most likely reason in my mind is to make themselves feel better and justify their beliefs by treating him well.
I got something out of this book that I never expected, and I don’t think was the intention of the author. KKK members are a group of people I have never met and know nothing about. Rather than seeing them as one-dimensional hate machines, I came to see them more as I think Daryl sees them, as real people with real life issues. They have come to a different belief for reasons that they can clearly explain. That does not justify their beliefs or actions, but it does explain them, and that is the first step in making a change.
I think Daryl’s friendship did a similar thing for them regarding black people. It replaces a one-dimensional stereotype with a real person, who is much harder to hate.
Still, in the end, the main feeling I am left with is that this book presents a false premise - that Daryl personally "coverted" 200 KKK members into non-racists. I wish it were true, but I just don't see that in the book at all.
Profile Image for Samarth Gupta.
154 reviews26 followers
August 2, 2018
"Racism is similar to cancer; unless treated, it will spread and eventually consume the whole body. If the afflicted body procreates after being attacked with such a deadly malady, whether it be cancer or racism, there is a good chance that any offspring will be exposed to it as well. And the terrible process will begin all over again in a new generation."

"The FBI in the 1960's devised a top secret counter-intelligence program which they named 'COINTELPRO.' Information was gathered by informers on the groups that were under surveillance. Then, through dissemination of misinformation, internal strife was created within the power structure and rank and file of an organization."

"It amazed me that while Klansmen know where Hoover stood in regard to them, they still insist that dr. King was a Communist because they assert J. Edgar Hoover and the FBI said so. For whatever reason, although they also state Hoover made up lies about the Klan, they refuse to believe that Hoover could have lied about MLK Jr."

"'There is one thing people don't realize. A Klansman is not punched out of a standard cookie cutter. You have all walks of life coming into here for all various reasons. Some of them hate basically juste hate Jews. A lot of them just hate Negroes. Some of them hate both. Some of them don't like Orientals and that's why they joined. It depends on what part of the country you're from as to what your problems are.' I wondered, as I gazed at the man before me, if he realized the full meaning of his words - that people who joined the Klan had problems and that perhaps the most significant similarity between them was the feeling of hate."

"In fact, I was discovering some common traits of the Klan members and one that surprised me was that hardly any Klansmen have visited places outside the United States and many have never gotten beyond the state in which they reside."

"Supreme Court Justice Hugo Black had been a Klansman in Alabama in the 1920's. Senator Robert Byrd from West Virginia, who is still a Senator today, had been a Klansman in the 1940's."

"I work with a newspaper. I feel it is wrong that the newspaper ignores a lot of things. I have probably never seen as many news stories incorrectly printed as I have since I have been a Klan member."

"Nevertheless, I believe the best way to reach the hearts and minds of those who oppose you is to allow them to be themselves."

"Though the idea of being friends with a person whose belief system you despise sounds like an impossibility, I believe I have demonstrated that it is indeed, very possible for two diametrically opposed human beings to learn and accept enough about each other to co-exist without strife."
Profile Image for Priscilla.
Author 2 books75 followers
March 21, 2015
This book and its author are extraordinary. What courage! Daryl is an inspiration for us to always strive to see the humanity in others and seek common ground, rather than dismissing folks with polar opposite views out of hand.

"Time and exposure is a great healer--perhaps the only healer for irrational fear and hatred. Laws can be made to take people out of the Klan, but laws cannot be made to take the Klan mentality out of people. The best way we can learn to respect each other is to know each other."

"There are people who feel that racism and those who propagate it should be ignored. They think that giving such beliefs any type of attention will only promote them. I believe some things can be ignored and will eventually go away, like the teaser or bully we have all encountered in grade school. However, I do not feel that racists fit into that category. Racism is similar to cancer; unless treated, it will spread and eventually consume the whole body. If the afflicted body procreates after being attacked with such a deadly malady, whether it be cancer or racism, there is a good chance that any offspring will be exposed to it as well. And the terrible process will begin all over again in a new generation."
Profile Image for Susan.
399 reviews10 followers
June 14, 2018
I'm so glad I read this book. I wasn't sure what to expect. Would it be a diatribe against the Klan? A history? A voyeuristic look at the weirdness of white supremacists?

Davis's book was none of these things. It was instead a thoughtful balanced discussion of how Davis went about answering the question: How can someone hate me when he doesn't even know me?

I was very impressed not only with Davis's persistence in seeking out Klan members and getting to know them, but also with how insightful his perspective on race relationships really was. The premise is almost alarming in its boldness: a black man reaching out to Klan leaders and interviewing them about their perspectives on race relationships, and even forging unlikely friendships with some of them.

But even more interesting than that is Davis's discussion of equality and fairness. The majority of the book is simply reporting the things Davis did, events he attended and the conversations he had with various individuals. However, he does occasionally let his personal opinions peek through, and these were the sections I found most fascinating.

Davis believes strongly that equality means equality for all--even Klan members. For example, one situation Davis describes involves a Klan member whose hood was stolen by a white bystander. The Klan member was falsely accused of assaulting a police officer during the incident, but no such thing actually happened. As an eyewitness, Davis defended the rights of the Klan member to a fair trial. Ultimately, the Klan member was convicted of an assault which never occurred and the bystander was not prosecuted. Davis concludes the discussion with these comments: "It was sad to see that if someone belongs to a minority group or holds beliefs that are not in alignment with the general sentiment of the majority, they will not find justice; at the same time those who uphold the sentiment of the majority can count on the support of the legal system to allow them to commit "permissible" unlawful acts.

Davis is in no way defending the Klan. He is instead defending the right of every citizen to receive justice--even if that citizen holds unpopular (and even clearly wrong) views.

Still, Davis concludes with a more encouraging note: "The change in Tom Tarrants [a former member of one of the most violent Klan groups in the south, who later became a Christian and renounced his former views and associations] is perhaps the best argument that with God's help, all is possible. Like Tom, I believe the healing power of God is so great, a person, organization, or even a nation can be reborn...I pray for the time when people focus on showing each other what they are capable of accomplishing, rather than concentrating on what color they are or from where their family originated."

I love his final statement in the book: "Perhaps my experiences will shed more understanding and others will be inspired to seek out and eradicate racial prejudice with education, not only the academic type one receives in school, but the kind we attain when we learn about our fellow human beings from one-on-one, non-confrontational encounters. It is my dream, that through this new discourse, in a new millennium of brotherly love and friendship, we will overcome hatred and prejudice."

Don't read this book for the beauty of its prose. Davis isn't a writer; he's a musician. But he has an important message to communicate, and that's what makes this book so powerful. Read it to gain a new perspective from someone who was willing to give his enemies a chance, and in so doing, turned a few of them into friends.
Profile Image for Ryder Seamons.
22 reviews1 follower
July 28, 2025
This book earns five stars purely for the bravery of its author. Daryl Davis has spent his adult life befriending Klan members, white supremacists, and Neo-Nazis, not as a covert effort to eventually show them the error of their ways but just to understand them. He is the embodiment of "love your enemies" and "bless those that curse you." The current standard for how to treat the people you disagree with is to come in with guns blazing, use belittling and hurtful language, and smear your opponent's character. Daryl Davis teaches us that we can separate people from their beliefs. We can recognize their value and dignity even if the ideas they subscribe to are wrong or even dangerous. This is perhaps the most beautiful takeaway from this book. I sometimes wonder what I would do if I encountered a white supremacist or a Klan member in robes. What does Daryl Davis do? He shakes their hand and talks to them and asks for a picture. This approach has encouraged dozens of people to change their beliefs and re-route their lives. It makes me wonder how many of our disagreements could be solved by kindness, patience, and bravery.
Profile Image for Sharon.
57 reviews
December 29, 2015
After reading "Natchez Burning" I wanted to read a nonfiction book about racism in Maryland, where I live. A friend recommended "Klan-destine Relationships" by Daryl Davis. Daryl is a local black man, who wanted to better understand the causes of racism and hate. Daryl is a unique man, who had the courage to infiltrate the KKK, interview them, go to their homes, meet their families, and learn their history. Daryl was able to patiently listen to their hate, calmly ask them questions that made them think, and eventually he became friends with most of them. His story is worth reading and is courageous, hopeful, and an eye opener of our past history.
Profile Image for Dani Dányi.
634 reviews84 followers
April 2, 2024
Daryl Davis fekete amerikai zenész, és nem is akármilyen: Jerry Lee Lewis, BB king, Chuck Berry mellett is játszott, többek között. Szóval kőprofi.
Emellett ahogy szinte bármilyen fekete amerikait a 60-as, 70-es években, őt is érintette a rasszizmus, egyéni, közösségi és rendszerszinten is. És foglalkoztatni is kezdte a dolog: egyáltalán mi ez, miért utál valaki egy komplett idegent annak a bőrszíne miatt?
Aztán nem elégedett meg olvasással és elmélkedéssel, hanem kiment a komfortzónájától legtávolabbra, és elkezdett összejárni beszélgetni a Ku Klux Klán tagjaival. Annyiban nem volt nehéz dolga, hogy mindenhol ott nyüzsögtek, ahol (meglehetős flegmával szerintem, de) fellépett.
Daryl Davis szinte naív, fatalista öntudattal és hittel végigtolja ezt a több évtizedes kalandot. 1998-ban járunk a könyv végére. Rengeteg találkozást és beszélgetést ír le, veető figurákkal egy egész csomó különféle Klan alcsoportból. Van akivel a börtönben beszél, van akivel otthon, van akivel barátságot köt, van aki idővel kiugrik a rasszista gyűlöletcsoportból. De Daryl nem kiugrasztóember: ő egyszerűen ott van és kérdez és figyel, könyvet ír, kiáll amikor ki kell és látszólag leszarja, hogy milyen színű ember ellen történik épp igazságtalanság.
Nagyon meredek könyv. Pont azzal, ahogy ítéletmentesen, semlegesen beszél és mesél. Nehéz megszookni, hogy valaki ilyen pártatlanul és személyesen írja le, ahogy hosszú beszélgetéseket folytat - hogy ellenségeivel vagy sem, az már induláskor ambivalens.
Elsőre erősellenérzéseim voltak, nyilván a Klan tagokkal szemben, az ostoba és otromba véleményeik, militáns neonáci gyűlölködésük, elszánt szemellenzősségük - és nem is mértékben a tényelg kisiskolásan nevetséges titulusaik és hierarchiájuk... nem is ragozom, de emellett kissé hülyének néztem a szerzőt is, bevallom. Elvégre nyilvánvaló mi a rasszizmus és hogyan működik - mondom én, de az igaz, hogy kevés, és egyre kevesebb nyíltan vagy akár burkkoltan rasszista emberrel van dolgom. Erre mondjuk manapság, hogy "buborékban élünk", vagyis ritkán vagyunk kitéve ellenkező, vagy akár ellenséges embereknek, az eleve kűzdőtérnek berendezett politikumon kívül. Davis hozzáállása lenyűgöz. Kölcsönös és emberi odafordulással áthidalni a legmélyebb szakadékot, és helyrehozni a látszólag helyrehozhatatlant. Nagyon is hiszek a kölcsönösségben mint alapértékben, és elképesztő számomra, mekkora munka és ráfordítás volt ennek a könyvnek az alapanyagát előállítani. Persze ezt nem alapanyag: ez egy valódi életmű, és legalább olyan jelentős, mint a zenei.
10.7k reviews35 followers
May 20, 2024
A BLACK MUSICIAN GETS TO KNOW SOME KKK MEMBERS, ON A FRIENDLY BASIS

Musician and author Daryl Davis wrote in the Prologue to this 1998 book, “I am on a long journey… my arduous journey is an odyssey of the mind, heart and spirit, on which I, a Black man, have set out to meet those who do not know, but hate me---the members of the Ku Klux Klan. To them, because of the color of my skin, I am the enemy and I must know why. That is the reason I have come to this lace and many others like it. My aim is not to expunge the past of the Ku Klux Klan. Its history of violence and terror are part of me and my race forever. But I believe we must, while never losing sight of the past, move forward… we must first have a cease fire so that we can meet and find a common ground. This is why I began my search. This is the goal of my journey.”

Roger Kelly, a KKK Grand Dragon, told him, “I wouldn’t go along with gay-bashing, but, I would go along with being harder on gays than I would be on Blacks. I don’t believe you bought your skin, but I believe that a gay went out and produced what he is today. You didn’t have a say if you were going to be Black or White, but a gay, I believe he could change if he wanted to. It’s like being born a racist; everybody says that you’re not born a racist, it’s bred into you, so how can you be born a homosexual?” (Pg. 42)

He continues, “He told me that he had approached the head of the local chapter of [NAACP] about having a parade in which the Klan and the NAACP would march together in an anti-drug crusade through the streets of the local low-income projects to denounce drugs. He said his suggestion was flatly turned down by the NAACP leader. This, according to him, is one of the things that has caused Roger to disrespect the NAACP.” (Pg. 44)

Kelly goes on, “We consider [Martin Luther King Jr.] a Communist, and the United States sent millions of people overseas to kill Communists, but we have Communists in our own society. We actually believe he was a Communist whether he was Black or White. We’re not saying because he’s Black he’s a Communist.” (Pg. 51)

Davis asked him, “Was [Governor George] Wallace a Klansman, a secret Klansman or just a Klan supporter?” … He pondered my question silently… before answering, ‘Well, I can’t say one way or the other, but I know he wasn’t that much against them. Then again, all the people liked him in that state, both Blacks and Whites. In fact, they loved him and they loved his wife. I don’t know for a fact that he was, but if I was to take a bet, I would probably bet that he was a member.” (Pg. 59-60)

Davis wrote, “Having read about the incident in which the NAACP didn’t like the idea of me being in the Klan. That was not the case with the Blacks working with me or the ones I was working with. They were all in favor of me working. There was one of the biggest Black rallies to support me that Maryland has ever seen. You didn’t see that on the news either, incidentally.” (Pg. 65)

Davis explained, “the Klan became a target of COINTELPRO. The FBI paid informers to gather information. Later, letters were sent anonymously to the employers of Klansmen telling of their affiliations, costing many of them their jobs… The plan was that Klansmen would think that someone within their organization has betrayed them, creating an air of doubt and causing everyone to be suspicious of each other. Letters were also written under female aliases to the wives of Klansmen, detailing, and sometimes fabricating, sexual, adulterous adventures of their husbands… It has amazed mt that while Klansman know where Hoover stood in regard to them, they still insist that Dr. King was a Communist because they assert J. Edgar Hoover and the FBI said so. For whatever reason, although they also state Hoover made up lies about the Klan, they refuse to believe that Hoover could have lied about Martin Luther King.” (Pg. 69-70)

Davis asked Robert White (another Grand Dragon) if he supported David Duke, and was told, “To an extent I do, to an extent I don’t. He changes hats too much depending on whatever situation will suit his purpose.” Davis asked, “Why have many of the Klan groups today aligned themselves with White Power Skinheads, Nazi movements and other White Supremacist and Right-Wing groups? Twenty years ago, most Klans would not do that. Today, some of them hold joint rallies and march together.” He was told, “The need of support… there is strength in numbers. Back in the Seventies we … invited the Nazis. We didn’t allow them to distribute their literature, but we did let them speak.” (Pg. 101)

Davis asked White, “Being a former police officer, how do you feel about what you saw on the videotape of the Rodney King beating?” He was told, “What I saw on the tape looked bad… King was actually subdued. He was on the ground…. All they had to do was handcuff him and take him to jail. They didn’t have to do what they did…. they were wrong… As far as what everybody did in California, setting the city off like that, that was wrong. Stuff like that is going to lead to a race riot … and there’s going to be a lot of innocent people killed for no reason at all. The police were wrong as far as I’m concerned.” (Pg. 102-103)

Davis noted that White and a member of the Black Panthers had worked together on some cases of prisoner’s rights while they were both in jail: “Did it seem odd to people there?’ ‘Yeah, it seemed odd to people who saw us getting along pretty good together. I liked him. He had a lot of balls…’ I shook my head. ‘A Black Panther and a Klansman working together side by side. You found a common ground to stand on.” (Pg. 129)

Davis observes, “I am not advocating the views of Roger Kelly and his Klan. How could I, a Black man, do so? But can reverse discrimination be justified by assuming the posture, ‘Well the Klan has done it to us before, so now we are going to do it back to them?’ That is one way to look at it, but that also can do more to polarize the races instead of allowing all races to be educated about one another’s fears and concerns through communication.” (Pg. 159)

When Davis was at a KKK/Skinhead rally, “A policer officer walked up to me and said, ‘Get out of the pavilion.’ ‘I know some of these Klansmen,’ I replied to his order… Just them the Grand Knighthawk, the Grand Klaliff and the Grand Dragon arrived. The Grand Klaliff said, ‘How are you doing Mr. Davis?’ The police officer’s eyes opened wide… he asked me, ‘Just whose side are you on?’ … I replied, ‘Our future’s.’” (Pg. 178)

Chester Doles (a KKK member) explained to him, “If you’re an Anglo-Saxon and you want to join and you’re Catholic, that’s fine. The reason Catholic at one time were not allowed in the Klan started during immigration time when Catholics were coming over here from Rome, Italy, whatever... They were putting the Pope in their country above the President of the United States, but yet they wanted to be American citizens. That’s when the Klan took the stance against all immigrants and said that you had to be a true Anglo-Saxon.” (Pg. 192)

He accompanied a ‘Klanslady’ as she sang at her home. “During that time at the piano, we were not a Black man and a White women divided by our skin colors. We were just musicians, having a good time. But, although her feelings of dislike for Blacks had momentarily evaporated, I knew that no matter how friendly she was or how hospitable, those feelings were deeply entrenched and alive. Nevertheless, it was a beginning.” (Pg. 277)

Davis explains, “If a Klansman is unsure whether or not a certain person is a Klansman, he may attempt to find out by use of the code word, ‘AYAK,’ and acronym for ‘Are You A Klansman?’ For instance, he may say to someone, ‘Do you know Mr. Ayak?’ … he might respond with something like, ‘Yes, I know Mr. Ayak, and I also know Mr. Akia,’ a countercode acronym for ‘A Klansman I Am.’” (Pg. 299)

He concludes, “Racism is perpetuated when people have little personal experience with those they fear or hate. I only hope my relationships with Klansmembers can act as an antidote. You can’t force anybody to change, but you cannot disavow a friendship when you see it in the making.” (Pg. 303) Roger told him, “If I should die before you Daryl, I would like you to be at my funeral and I’ll put that in my will.’ It was a measure of how far our relationship had come… Two months ago Roger and his new wife had a baby girl and named her Megan. Yesterday I became Megan Kelly’s godfather.” (Pg. 304-305) He adds, “I felt it was time we get to know one another on a social basis and not under the cover of darkness… Klanmembers have invited me to their homes for dinner. And some members have quit the Klan as a result of getting to know and respect me and my non-racist beliefs. Time and exposure is a great healer… The best way we can learn to respect each other is to know each other.” (Pg. 308-309)

This book will be of great interest to those seeking reconciliation between different peoples.

95 reviews2 followers
April 22, 2025
4.5 stars, rounding down to 4.

"A Black man with a White woman meeting with the Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan and his bodyguard in a truck stop motel room for two hours seemed inconceivable based on what I had heard and personally knew from the Klan. I went looking for a violent man who hates people for no other reason than the difference of skin color. The quest failed...We disagreed on many things and saw humor in others, proving that a Black man and a Klansman can stand on common ground, if only momentarily."


This was a book that I genuinely thought I'd never get the opportunity to read!

It sat on my TBR for years after I, like millions of others, listened to the author's viral TED talk on YouTube in the late 2010s. Why did it sit on my list for so long? This book, first published in 1998, has been out of print for several years, so a new copy is out of the question. This book does not have an e-book offering, and used copies cost nearly $300 (at the time of this review). I am not a stranger to waiting for a good deal on rare books, and I've even found some success in acquiring books that are challenging to pin down. But after years and years of searching, I was nearly ready to give up and remove this book from my TBR entirely.

Alas, God has a sense of humor. While browsing my state's interlibrary loan site, I saw one copy in circulation. It was located in a town I lived in for nearly 4.5 years! Sometimes what you're looking for has been right in front of you the whole time.

Klan-Destine relationships covers the research of Daryl Davis, a Grammy award-winning musician with a strong interest in hate groups, particularly the Ku Klux Klan (or the Klan, which is the shorthand he uses in the book and is the shorthand I will use in this review). Davis is an American with diplomat parents and spent much of his childhood abroad. It was only when he came back to the U.S. that he experienced racism, and those experiences fueled some of his interest in the topic of hate groups. When one of his friends wound up joining the Klan, Davis decided that he wanted to speak with the Imperial Wizard (akin to a "National Director") of the Klan that his friend joined. From that initial meeting, more followed, and he even began to form relationships with some of the members.

"I had a Black house guest upstairs and I wondered what he would have thought if he knew that the three men he heard laughing and joking downstairs were wearing robes and hoods only a couple hours earlier."


Davis's intentions in meeting with members of the Klan were twofold. First, he wanted to collect information about the Klan from primary sources. Second, he wanted to find common ground. Davis, in summary, says this at the end of the book about his efforts:

"Before I began my journey, I realized in seeking out the driving forces behind the racism I found in members of the Ku Klux Klan, I would hear a lot of things that would bother and sometimes anger me. However, I decided to meet those who held views opposed to my own and get their side of the story. Some Klanspeople I met were persuaded by my opinions, and others were not. Nevertheless, I believe the best way to reach the hearts and minds of those who oppose you is to allow them to be themselves."


So, was Davis successful in his endeavors? That depends on how you look at things.

THE GOOD: Many have left the Klan as a direct result of Davis’s efforts. In recent interviews like this one, Davis claims to have the robes of over 200 people who have left the Klan as a result of his bridge-building efforts. But few, if any, of those people left the Klan before the book was written. Only two of the subjects interviewed and documented in this book verifiably left the Klan, and one subject left the Klan decades before they were interviewed by Davis. Whether this increase in Klan defectors can be attributed to Davis’s personal efforts or to his increased notoriety, I cannot definitively say. But, if it is the former, it’s interesting to see the length of time that it took for some of the Klan members to finally leave. While Davis’s approach may not be the fastest method to get people out of the Klan, it does seem to be effective. It’s a helpful reminder for us all: true, lasting change doesn’t happen overnight.

THE BAD: Though many people eventually left the Klan, many did not. And while most of the Klan members interviewed in the book were willing to speak to Davis, invite him into their homes, and even befriend him, they still maintained their racist beliefs. While the outward behavior of many may not have been as vile as one might expect, one thing is certain: their hearts were not changed. Conversation alone cannot fix someone who is hateful enough to join a group like the Klan, and I am inclined to disagree that conversation with those who are different from us is a meaningful metric that we can use to measure progress. Only Christ can change and soften hearts. As a Christian, I was sad to see that Davis, who also claimed to be Christian, did not spend more time challenging the spiritual beliefs of the Klan and leading them to true faith in Christ and repentance. There were some situations where faith was addressed, but this was not at the forefront of most of the conversations.

“My talks with Tom added a new dimension to my odyssey. For the Southern Klan group of which he had been a catalyst was reputed to be the most violent and murderous of all. Studying and listening to him, it was hard to believe he was once called ‘the most dangerous man in Mississippi’, who some years ago would have soon killed me as to look at me. The change in Tom Tarrants is perhaps the best argument that with God’s help, all is possible.

“Like Tom, I believe that the healing power of God is so great, a person, organization, or even a nation can be reborn.”


Racism, prejudice, and hate should be publicly addressed, but we cannot forget that they are symptoms of the problem of sin.

THE UGLY: Davis shows an interesting and sometimes concerning amount of sympathy towards the Klan members he interviews. He financially and emotionally supports a Klansman who likely assaulted 2 black men, allows himself to be a kind of Klan “diversity poster child” at a conference, and even seems to sympathize with their claims of unfair treatment with law enforcement, in society, and in the justice system, sometimes even likening them to the struggles that other people of color & members of marginalized groups experience.

“The whole trial seemed theatrical. The man who snatched the hood was not present. Most surprisingly, the best witness for the prosecution, the police officer whose back the Klansman allegedly pounced upon, was not present at the trial either, nor was any written affidavit on his behalf presented. It was obvious to me that while the Klansman did have an extensive criminal history, he was convicted and sentenced this time just on the basis of his being a member of the Klan. I could see no merit or reason for this. I thought perhaps the judge was trying to teach him a lesson by giving him a dose of the Klan’s own medicine: guilty for being Black; guilty for being Jewish; guilty for associating with a Black, jew or homosexual; guilty for being anything but a Klansman or a Klanswoman.”


These experiences, in my opinion, cannot be conflated. In most situations, members of marginalized groups should not be treated as monoliths because the situations that cause them to be members of these groups are usually outside of their control. The same cannot be said for members of the Klan. They, in my opinion, have earned their treatment in society as a direct result of their beliefs and actions, which can be changed or rehabilitated. Listening to & recording their beliefs for research purposes is one thing, but sympathizing with them is another matter entirely. I can understand that as you get closer to someone and form a relationship with them, it’s easier to feel sorry for them and empathize with their perspective. But we must be on guard in these situations.

Many reviewers of this book claimed that the writing was so poor that it detracted from the book. I wholeheartedly disagree with this criticism. The majority of the book is comprised of transcriptions of conversations, and if you read the book with that context in mind, it's very easy to understand.

Despite my ideological concerns with this book, I would wholeheartedly recommend it to anyone who can get their hands on it. I pray that, through Davis' story, we are encouraged to fearlessly and publicly confront and correct the evildoers of our day.
Profile Image for Patrice Doten.
1,300 reviews19 followers
June 17, 2023
A thought-provoking glimpse inside the minds of deeply bigoted people, I found this book sad, disturbing, and angering in turn. I’ve always held the view that racism results from ignorance and can therefore be overcome by education and extended interaction over time with members of the despised people group. Daryl Davis’ firsthand account of his experiences shook that theory. I now find myself having to consider the possibility that while some people can be educated out of bigotry, it’s extremely difficult to dislodge in those for whom it’s been incorporated into the core identity. This is a disheartening realization. I can’t say I enjoyed the book, as I often found it sad, disturbing, and angering in turn, but it’s well-written and definitely worth reading.
Profile Image for Clarissa.
586 reviews4 followers
December 23, 2018
Very interesting and to be read by all to start understanding racisms. I was able to relate to Daryl Davis on a special level as we both grew up in different countries (not the one from our parents) and we learned earlier to accept all human without discrimination. Could you not stop reading it.
Profile Image for Jennifer.
269 reviews4 followers
February 14, 2008
It was a crazy story, but it could have been much more than that in the hands of a more capable writer. Also, the constant name dropping got pretty old pretty quickly
Profile Image for Hildey.
38 reviews
November 9, 2020
"How can you hate me when you don't even know me?"
Davis shows that the key to solving a lot of issues (not just racial ones) is mutual respect and dialogue.
Profile Image for Byron Fike.
Author 2 books4 followers
September 30, 2017
Daryl Davis is not a reporter or civil rights worker. He's not politician nor does he even appear to be that politically active. He doesn't particularly like to be called African-American although he did live in Africa for 10 years and has great appreciation for his African heritage. He's a professional musician who happens to be black. His music resume is impressive. He's played with Ray Charles, Jerry Lee Lewis, Willie Nelson and Chuck Berry (to name just a few).

The book records his journey of discovery. Daryl wanted to know the roots of racism. He wanted to know why people hated him simply because of the color of his skin. He begins meeting with individual members of the Ku Klux Klan. The purpose of the meetings was not to argue, or to change their mind. Rather, he wanted to listen. He wanted to learn what would cause someone to be a racist.

I loved his approach, and so did most of the Klansmen and Klanswomen he interviewed. He did not set out to develop friendships but that happened on more than on occasion. He did not set out to influence people to leave the Klan, but that also happened on more than one occasion. The reader doesn't discover that Daryl is a Christian until one has read 2/3 of the book. However, his approach is one that Jesus would certainly endorse.

When Imperial Wizard Chester Doles was arrested, his pregnant, 19 year old girlfriend was left caring for his other children. Without telling Chester, Daryl called the girl and asked her to meet him. Knowing she was without any means of support while Chester was incarcerated, he gave her some money to help. Davis writes, "Whether or not Chester Doles ever changes his feelings towards members of another religion or race, one thing is for sure: he is a Klansman who will never forget and can never deny that a Black man helped keep food on his children's table" (p. 251). What a beautiful illustration of the teaching, "If your enemy is hungry, feed them" (Prov. 25:21; Rom. 12:20).

At a Klan rally, Davis was talking to one of Klansmen with which he has previously met. Specifically he was conversing with the Grand Klaliff, the Grand Knighthawk and the Grand Dragon. After the Klan members walk away the officer asked, "Just whose side are you on?" Daryl's answer was prophetic, "Our future's" (p. 178). Indeed Daryl Davis shows a way for our divided culture to move forward. What would happen if we became serious about meeting with those with whom we disagree simply to listen and understand?

In meeting with those who hated him because of his skin color, Daryl discovered that often there would be things said that he could agree with. He suggested they work together to get drug dealers off the streets, for example. Likewise, those who met with him would often say horribly offensive remarks at first, but over time they came to see that their racial stereotypes were not present in the man meeting with them. They developed respect for Daryl Davis and would often protect him from potential threats.

In thinking about his journey of discovery Davis writes, "Racism is perpetuated when people have little personal experience with those they fear or hate. I only hope my relationships with Klanmembers can act as an antidote. You can't force anybody to change, but you cannot disavow a friendship when you see it in the making" (p. 303). He also wrote, "I remained honest with each and every Klanmember I met, and, most importantly, I remained honest with myself. I did not pretend to be anything other than what I am, and though I allowed each Klanmember to know where I stood, I never forced my beliefs upon anyone. Over a period of time, this, I believe, became the basis for their trust and respect for me" (p. 308).
Profile Image for Eden Silverfox.
1,228 reviews102 followers
May 26, 2025
Daryl Davis is a musician who has played with people like Chuck Berry and B.B. King. He spent most of his early childhood in other countries because his father was a Foreign Service Agent. Daryl grew up around people of many races and cultures. He experienced racism for the first time at 10 years old.

He moved back to the United States with his parents. Rocks hit Daryl while he walked with the Cub Scouts during a local parade.

Daryl didn't know why people were attacking the Cub Scouts. He realized later that the people weren't attacking the Cub Scouts but attacking him. He didn't understand how people could hate him because of the color of his skin.

This incident, and others later in life, led Daryl to question why he and others like him are hated.

After a performance one night, Daryl talked to someone who was in the audience. The guy informed Daryl that he was a member of the KKK. The man and Daryl became friends and eventually gave him contact information for the KKK.

This led to Daryl interviewing members of the KKK. Over the years, he has been able to get some members to leave.

Daryl believes finding common ground is the key to getting people like KKK members to change their views. It has worked for Daryl Davis, and I've always believed that we all have more in common than we think.

It takes bravery and lots of patience to do what he does. His story is inspiring, but I don't like people who use his story to put down others for not having patience with racists. I admire him for what he does, but we all don't have to do it. I know I do not have the patience he does. And even he gets angry sometimes.

Daryl is an interesting person with an upbringing that not many people have had. While he has experienced racism in the States, his childhood experiences in other countries were different, and that might explain why he tries to connect with people who have racist views. He's trying to understand as well as help others see we're all just human.

If you like this book, I recommend checking out his documentary, Accidental Courtesy, released in 2016.
Profile Image for Jason Dyer.
7 reviews
May 25, 2025
After watching Mr. Davis on the Joe Rogan Experience, I knew I had to read his book. The interview was fascinating and his storytelling was top-tier. My favorite quote from the interview was this: “The cure for ignorance is called education. Fix the ignorance, there’s nothing to fear…if there’s nothing to fear, there’s nothing to hate.”

It was interesting to read the origination of the KKK and how they became radicalized even against Grand Wizard Forrest’s wishes. After reading they dissolved in 1870, I blown away by how many members the KKK had after the klan was reconstituted (100,000 in 1921 and 2,000,000 in 1922).

One of the more powerful quotes at the very beginning of this book was: “To them, because of the color of my skin, I am the enemy and I must know why.”

I thoroughly enjoyed page 308 as it explains that ignorance breeds hate and violence. I am so glad I read this book and go to understand the conversations he had throughout.

Finally, another quote I found vital was on page 310: “Racism, and prejudice, however overt or subtle, are rampant in our world today. They are most common in those with poor self-esteem. Until people feel positively about themselves, they will look for someone else to step on in order to negatively gain what they cannot positively achieve.”

I absolutely loved the epilogue where Mr. Davis provided updates on the lives of the people he had conversations with throughout this book!
290 reviews13 followers
August 8, 2021
While quite articulate, Daryl Davis's book rates 5 stars for me due to the sheer courage and determination he, being a Black man, exercised in examining and interviewing members of the Ku Klux Klan. His stated objective was to seek for common ground and understanding. It was an eye-opener to discover there several different branches of the KKK with varying philosophies. Some are white supremacists, others separatists, yet each of the leaders Davis interviewed showed respect for him, developed different degrees of friendship with him, and were opposed to violence. Klandestine Relationships challenged the stereotypical image I had of the Klan, and coming to an understanding of the viewpoints of non-violent Klans disturbed me, because I can see all too clearly the point of view of largely lower income, less-educated people, feeling disenfranchised from their country, and being primed to buy into Klan rhetoric. It is altogether too reminiscent of pre-WWII Germans, angry with the state of their country, turning against and exercising violence against specific segments their society. Chilling.
704 reviews7 followers
May 22, 2024
This's the account of a black man who sought out members of the Ku Klux Klan to dialog with - first (he says) in an effort to understand the roots of their racism, and then out of an attempt to convince them otherwise - and also, in some cases, out of friendship. He claims to be directly responsible for between forty and sixty people leaving the Klan.

Unfortunately, the writeups of his conversations appear to show a very awkward style that would appear unengaging on a personal level. I've seen tons of online forum threads that would beat them hands-down in reasoning and style and personal touch! Given Davis's actual success - and his professional career as a musician - I can only assume the conversations lose out in the writeups. Plausible motives for this might include poor memory, or perhaps reluctance to appear to be giving the Klan a platform.

So, I could recommend this book to people who want to see what the Klan is thinking but are shy about seeking it out more directly. Otherwise, however much I admire Davis's actual deeds, I hesitate to recommend this book.
Profile Image for Joel Alex.
389 reviews3 followers
June 1, 2017
An amazing look into one man's mission to better understand racism through members of the KKK. Daryl Davis recounts his conversations with members and leaders of the KKK. Instead of seeing them as hate mongering racists, he sees them as people. This builds a foundation of decency and humanity which, at times, turns into deep friendship. I found myself amazed at the ability of Davis to carry on meaningful discussions with people from a completely different and antagonist worldview. These discussions may not have changed a person immediately, but they have certainly, over the course of his life, made our world better. During this political climate, I often find myself wondering how I can carry a meaningful conversation with someone of a different political view or opinion, Davis provides me ample motivation and a wonderful example. I listened to Davis on the podcast "Snap Judgement" http://snapjudgment.org/unrequited and I needed to learn more.
Profile Image for Ruth.
166 reviews
April 7, 2020
A black American man's quest to understand racism in our country by interviewing the KKK.
"It is fear that is instilled in us through ignorance that often breeds hate. Hatred, if not kept in check, will sometimes escalate to destruction. Racism is similar to cancer, unless treated, it will spread and eventually consume the whole body.
In trying to understand how other people think, he also wants to get people to know him, as a person and his main focus is on the next generation. How do we stop the hate?
Profile Image for Katie.
644 reviews14 followers
August 19, 2022
Special thanks to the ILL opportunities through my local library - I was able to get my hands on a physical copy to read.

A really fascinating read - it was so interesting to hear Davis's account of his interactions with various klan members. There's been a few reviews stating that only one klan member changed their affiliation after meeting with Davis, but that isn't true - Davis references several, but he doesn't laud over them. In later interviews he says there have been 13 that quit and gave him their robes.
Profile Image for Tiff.
62 reviews
July 2, 2021
The book is a little dated but the story is no less extraordinary. Daryl Davis has a VERY unique approach to racism. I didn't know much about the KKK before reading this, and it was frankly fascinating/disturbing at times to read some of the interviews. The author has a brilliant mind and...guts. Sheer guts, to do what he's done. But most impressive was his determination to question and learn. All of us could learn from Davis to say the least.
Profile Image for Kat Robey.
126 reviews
October 9, 2017
Daryl Davis engaged in his beliefs by listening and learning about fellow human beings one-on-one in non-confrontational encounters. Hatred, name-calling, and avoidance do not serve those who hope to end prejudice. Engagement with the "other" whose ideas are diametrically opposed to ours and seeking common ground is the only way to shift the discussion toward unity.
Profile Image for Mist Willingham.
142 reviews
October 5, 2018
Daryl Davis is not a wonderful writer, but he IS a wonderful human being who embarked on a momentous journey to delve into the reasons for racial hatred. This journey is both moving and eye-opening, and I enjoyed traveling every step with him. This is a wonderful book for anyone who either hates or is hated for the colour of their skin, their religion or their sexual orientation.
55 reviews
April 10, 2021
Page 213: "It was sad to see that if someone belongs to a minority group or holds beliefs that are not in alignment with the general sentiment of the majority, they will not find justice; at the same time those who uphold the sentiment of the majority can count on the support of the legal system to allow them to commit 'permissible' unlawful acts."
Profile Image for Hana Gabrielle (HG) Bidon.
241 reviews8 followers
April 9, 2022
Glad that Daryl Davis went to the heart of racism in the United States to befriend Klan members who actively perpetuated racism especially against Black people. I'm glad he convinced some of the KKK members to unlearn their racism and leave the organization all together. Davis has done much more to end racism than some of the SJWs on Twitter.
Profile Image for Shelley Shoemaker.
184 reviews10 followers
March 12, 2024
An unbelievable journey taken by a Black Christian man to truly understand racism by sitting down and having real conversations with members of the KKK. He even eventually befriended several of these members. Daryl's only goal has been to break down barriers and foster understanding one human being at a time.
Profile Image for Grady R..
105 reviews2 followers
April 2, 2024
5/5

The content and rawness of the book alone satisfies five stars. What is even more impressive is the fact that every time I put it down, I wanted to keep reading. By the end I wished for more stories by him. There are definitely hard topics to read about, but it you are lucky enough to get your hands on a copy, do yourself a favor and read it.
Profile Image for Dacy Briggs.
185 reviews1 follower
April 23, 2024
Fantastic book about curiosity of other perspectives, the author goes into relationships with Klan members with an open mind and a Jesus-like method of hating the sin, not the sinner. Davis’s story of being given a standing ovation at a Klan rally was just awesome and showed that we are really all the same at the end of the day.
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