My Dyslexia

by Philip Schultz

An inspiring memoir of a Pulitzer Prize winner's triumph over disability.

Despite winning the Pulitzer Prize for Poetry in 2008, Philip Schultz could never shake the feeling of being exiled to the "dummy class" in school, where he was largely ignored by his teachers and peers and not expected to succeed. Not until many years later, when his oldest son was diagnosed with dyslexia, did Schultz realize that he suffered from the same condition.

In his moving memoir, Schultz traces his difficult childhood and his new understanding of his early years. In doing so, he shows how a boy who did not learn to read until he was eleven went on to become a prize-winning poet by sheer force of determination. His balancing act—life as a member of a family with not one but two dyslexics, countered by his intellectual and creative successes as a writer—reveals an inspiring story of the strengths of the human mind.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Psychology, Audiobook, Education, Biography, Disability

128 pages, Hardcover

First published August 29, 2011

About the author

Philip Schultz is the author of seven collections of poetry, including the Pulitzer Prize-winning Failure. He is the founder and director of the Writers Studio and lives in East Hampton, New York.

Reviews

[Dr. Appu Sasidharan (Dasfill) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Philip Schultz, in this memoir, tells his extraordinary journey as a dyslexic child who did not know to read at the age of eleven to become a Pulitzer Prize-winning poet. He mentions almost all the problems he faced as a dyslexic child. We can see teachers avoiding him, other children bullying him, his intellectual dilemmas, and his inability to understand what was happening in his life. This is one of those few memoirs that touches our hearts and brings tears to our eyes.

My favourite lines from this book
“I am good at chess. Thinking one or two steps ahead comes naturally to me. This type of thinking comes from compensating my dyslexia ”

"It was amazing to comprehend that all the cat-and-mouse games my mind plays, all its endless scheming and compensatory, roundabout thinking, not only owned a name, but was a disability many others also suffered from, in many cases knowingly."

“Now even thinking about writing, about my dyslexia depressed me.”

“The cure for loneliness is solitude. -Marianne Moore”

"I had no idea that my dyslexia was the reason why I ate alone every day in the restaurant ordering the same dish in school."

"For nonconformity, the world whips you with its displeasure"? Ralph Waldo Emerson”

"To some extent, bullies depend on their victims, feeling helpless and losing all conscious control over their ability to reason. That is why they often taunt in the public arena where the shame and stress are greatest for their victims."

"Ignorance is perhaps the most painful aspect of learning disability."

—————————————————————————
You can also follow me on
Instagram ID - Dasfill | YouTube Channel ID - Dasfill | YouTube Health Channel ID - Dasfill - Health | YouTube Malayalam Channel ID - Dasfill - Malayalam | Threads ID - Dasfill | X ID - Dasfill1 | Snapchat ID - Dasfill | Facebook ID - Dasfill | TikTok ID - Dasfill1

[David Hornik · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book literally changed my life. For years I have dismissed the impact dyslexia has had on my life. I have been happy to sweep it under the rug. But as I read this book on an airplane I found myself weeping. Philip Schultz captures the challenges, the pain, and maybe even the joy, of growing up with dyslexia. A hugely important read for anyone with dyslexia and any parent of a dyslexic.

[Anoud · Rating 4 out of 5]

Being a dyslexic who was undiagnosed til she was 30, who also loves to write poetry and is angry and anxious most of the time, this biography helped a lot. I never thought I'll relate to someone's bio this much, it hurts, but it helps to know in order to grow.

[Carol · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a little gem of a book. I read the whole book in less than two hours but learned so much about the experience of having dyslexia. Even though Philip Schultz won a Pulitzer Prize for ‘Failure’, a collection of poetry, he did not learn to read until he was eleven years old. He did not even find out that he had dyslexia until he was 58! He learned that he had it when his son was diagnosed with it.

Before reading this, I wondered how a man with dyslexia could become a poet. For me it is a very difficult task to write poetry and I don’t have to deal with dyslexia. But then, I remembered my friend who is a child psychiatrist who is dyslexic. Because of the tremendous amount of reading that she had in medical school, she hired a reader but she made it through because she was very determined and incredibly intelligent. Philip Schultz has those same qualities.

Mr. Schultz related the effect of having dyslexia in school and not knowing that he had it. His mind was his enemy. To escape teasing from his classmates, he stole coins from his father’s vending machine proceeds to eat in a restaurant every school day. He ate the same thing each time even though he hated it. He couldn’t read the menu; he ordered what he overheard being ordered. He thought of himself as being a dummy because he was put in a slow class and that is what other kids called him.

His life was filled with emotional pain and anxiety. His mind was truly his enemy. Then in his sophomore year, he fell in love with books. He still could not read them without a huge struggle but he loved them.

This book tells of the emotional journey that Mr. Schultz struggled through until he found that his brain was different from others. He found out that instead of being a dummy he was intelligent. Don’t let the size of the book deceive you, he packed a lot of suffering and then finally relief and self-acceptance in it.

I recommend this book to family and friends of anyone with dyslexia and to people with it whose minds are their enemies.


I received this book from GoodReads but that in no way influenced the content of my review.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

I heard Mr Schultz interviewed on the radio, NPR naturally, and couldn't leave the car until it was over. I tuned in as he was describing having taught himself to read at the age of 11, using comic books. I and, much more so, my son are dyslexic and comic books are his salvation. So much of what he said resonated with me and the traits and tendencies I see in my son. I ordered the book the minute I walked into the house.

I have seen, in some of the other reviews, complaints that the book is too short, too unfocused, not detailed enough, etc. But I would argue that that that is both deliberate and part of it's inherent beauty. He did not write it to be a comprehensive explication of what is life as a dyslexic. I believe his purpose was to help people understand, not just intellectually, but emotionally and physically, how the dyslexic mind is different.

I would argue that the book is very deliberately constructed in a way that both reflects the natural, instinctual processes his brain goes through, and self-consciously builds on and reinforces especially those peculiarities of a dyslexic mind. Note the layout of the front cover - read in the "normal" order, it says, "My Pulitzer Philip Prize Dyslexia Winner Schultz" - and his passage about deliberately making wrong turns when driving because that is how his mind works best.

No amount of anecdotes about life with dyslexia could really let a non dyslexic person understand, and there are many other book that offer great detail on the subject. He uses the form and flow of the narrative to reinforce and expand the central emotional concept of the book: a dyslexic mind works in an entirely different way from a normal mind. A convoluted, tortured, difficult way that offers an unexpected and complex result with a unique beauty that could only have been produced by that very process. His is less a memoir than an embodiment of dyslexia in prose.

*****

My only complaint - and I do not blame him, as from his perspective he could surely see it no other way - is that, despite the fact that much of the point of the book is the inherent value he has found in the results of the way his mind works, he persists in describing the wrongness of dyslexia and how it causes the brain not to process "correctly." It doesn't have to be seen that way. It is neither right nor wrong, it is simply different, and requires a different teaching method from the current standard.

As he so clearly knows, words - and especially words which label people or place on them a relative value - are incredibly powerful and leave a lasting mark, and we must take great care in applying them to our children. I will never tell my son his brain doesn't work correctly. Instead, we talk about how his brain works differently from most and how that may causes him some problems but it also gives him some benefits that others can never have. Like being very tall or very short, dyslexia is simply a trait that must be embraced and used to one's advantage.

[Kathleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Philip Schultz is telling me what it's like to be one of the students I tutor. He was a terrible student, often in trouble in school. He couldn't read. No one thought he'd end up a poet -- let alone a Pulitzer Prize winner. He'd been led to think of his predicament as a mix of stupidity and cussedness, with a tinge of insanity. I've always been the opposite -- what my mom called a "bookworm." I naturally turned to writing and then teaching. People like me are often reading teachers, and we can't get inside the skin of people like Schultz. But he found the name for his predicament -- dyslexia -- not long ago. When he decided to start this book he got depressed. Dyslexia had woven itself into his life in deep and painful ways. Reading still gives him pain. But words give him pleasure. I am glad he finally wrote about how this can be.

[Lanie J. · Rating 4 out of 5]

fantastic memoir, it’s a beautiful story on how his diagnosis changed him and how he grew from it. it was so interesting to read about his life, which was so vastly different to mine, yet we’re very similar in many ways.

[Lina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Audiobook Only: I blew threw this book so fast! It was fascinating to hear his story and experience and gain more perspective into the experience of an individual with a learning disability. It’s a quick listen/read and worth the time to hear his experience.

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this. Though not dyslexic myself, I felt like Schultz was able to describe the experience of having dyslexia. He went beyond the obvious, the repeated stories of just struggling to process language, but talked about anxiety and the impact dyslexia has had on his identity. He writes in such a way that he addresses the intersections of his identity and truly describes the experience of living with and coping with dyslexia.

[Laura Webb · Rating 2 out of 5]

Listened to this one on the road. It was really sad, as the author didn’t find out he was dyslexic until he was almost 60, and spent most of his life being bullied and called stupid or lazy. It gave a very accurate look at what a dyslexic child deals with regularly. Being Mom to my favorite dyslexic kid for 13 years, this book made me really thankful for the support and resources we have today.

[بثينة الإبراهيم · Rating 5 out of 5]

رائع!

[Roxanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a good memoir!

“Writers are archaeologists of their own souls. We dig until we hit bottom, only to find there is another bottom underneath, and another after that.”

[Kerri · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a memoir, not a guide to dyslexia. It’s a great way to understand the effects of dyslexia on a persons outlook rather then the technical books that tell you about the symptoms. It was a great break from the more technical books I’ve been reading.

[Karole-Ann Keniston · Rating 5 out of 5]

A quick read (or listen) that helps those of us that work with children with dyslexia or for parents of children with dyslexia.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

More so about the emotional toll learning disabilities takes on people and what it takes to overcome it.

[Ro · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyed his point of view of how he grew up with dyslexia. Also learning how he deals with it in his day to day life. Won't rate it because again how do you rate someone else experience. I would agree with some of the things but I also had different experiences.

[Ashley · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who experienced growing up with dyslexia and aspiring to become a writer, I was drawn to this book immediately. The memoir jumps from his experiences in grade and high school, college, and after coming to the realization that he has dyslexia, it's written very beautifully. There is no denying that Schultz is a poet; in lines like,” I was suffering the mysterious, perplexing and previously unacknowledged manner in which I received and absorbed all information of any import” (20), it’s easy to get lost in the lyrical flow of his writing. Schultz introduces his memoir by taking the reader through how it felt to share his dyslexia with the rest of the world—write a memoir—and all the insecurities that followed. He goes into detail about his childhood and being bullied.

As we get more of his childhood and his struggles with his faith, what truly permeates through this memoir is loneliness and the desire for solitude because that’s the one place where his anxiety was completely gone and he didn’t have to struggle to be normal. This theme is what stuck with me the most because I related to this immensely. Part of the reason why I’m not only an introvert but also shy is that I fear being thought of as stupid if I stumble on my words or can’t find the right things to say. Being alone eases this anxiety because I'm not being held to anyone’s expectations, and Shultz says it so artfully in his memoir.

I really appreciated how much meaning this memoir packed in such a short book and would highly recommend it to anyone who has a learning disability or knows someone that does have one.

[Flora Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an interesting look into the life of a dyslexic. Philip Schultz talks about his life as he was growing up as a child with an undiagnosed learning disability. He described how it felt to be bullied and made fun of by other students because of his inability to learn to read. And he described his determination to learn to cope and overcome his dyslexia. It was interesting to me to learn that how much more there is to dyslexia besides difficulty reading such as difficulty telling time on an anaolog clock, doing math, or following directions. As a mother of a dyslexic child I found it interesting viewing life from this perspective. It definitely gives a glimpse into their view of life and the difficulties they have to deal with. I would recommend this book for anyone that has a loved one with a learning disability.

[Huda Fel · Rating 4 out of 5]

A dyslexic father of a dyslexic child. This memoir shows how important it is for a person to understand and accept their own disability. Is it ever too late to accept what you are and what you have??

The father had a life where nothing made sense to him; he would read a poem and jump to the other without even noticing something was wrong. He didn't know why he was constantly bullied, why students used to shy away from him or avoid sitting next to him. He sounds relieved whenever he mentions his son; who's unlike him, not only relaxed with what he has, but he also enjoys it.

This is a guy who tends to create characters living his own life with a happier ending!
"How can you write a novel while you're so busy living one?"- My Dyslexia by Philip Schultz

[Katie Kenig · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was myself diagnosed with dyslexia in college. Like the author, I had already built up coping mechanisms and had struggled without support in primary and high school.

I cried through much of this book, because I felt understood in a profound way that I've never felt before. So many aspects of my life that I thought were just my quirks were explained in the context of a dyslexic brain. Amazing.

Extraordinary if you want to understand how a dyslexic person functions, or if you are yourself dyslexic and are interested in a perspective on this life.

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book made me so appreciate the support that learning disabled children get at our school. It's a very quick read, and inspiring to learn all he overcame with his determination to be a writer.

[Esther · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting hearing a dyslexic mans perception of himself and the world.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Although shorter than I expected, there is an awful lot of life and experience packed into Schultz's book. I usually have a hard time with memoirs that jump around in time, but Schultz does it in a way that flows and somehow works, perhaps because it's a book more about coming to terms with how dyslexia has impacted his life in retrospect rather than an attempt to tell his whole life story. Some portions felt a bit on the repetitive side - the same experiences and same emotions again and again - but that also serves to emphasize how his perception of himself throughout his life has shaped his life. The retrospection definitely adds power, such as when he is able to interpret his childhood in light of not only his own experiences, but those of a community of immigrants, as well as when he reflects on his interactions with a Jewish poet and the reactions he had in certain situations without understanding the way in which his dyslexia influenced them. I found it really interesting in those moments when he compares his own experiences to those of his son, who also has dyslexia and whose diagnosis was the reason he was finally able to make sense of his own learning struggles, and I share his gratefulness that his son's experiences are different and hope that this is true of more and more students these days as we learn more about how people learn and how it's not all the same.

"my"

[John Daily · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having been unfamiliar with Schultz and his work, I was surprised at how relevant this book was for me. As someone with Tourette's Syndrome (TS) I, like Schultz with his dyslexia, was bullied mercilessly as a child --not only by other students, but teachers and adults as well, who weren't familiar with it in the 1970s and 80s. TS sufferers also frequently have a secondary, milder form of a neurological disorder and mine is OCD. This causes me to "split" double consonants by aligning them across the bridge of my nose whenever I happen upon them. Depending on the book, this can be a tedious, frustrating, time-consuming process. (As an example, the Harry Potter series (with its double "Rs" and "Ts") took me forever to read.) I'm not comparing this to the struggle of dyslexia except to say that it is different from how most people read.

In this brief memoir, Schultz draws a wonderful, non-cynical portrait of his childhood and shares how he came to terms with the disorder as a writer and parent (one of his children has dyslexia). It's written in a familiar tone, as if one is sitting with a friend and not a clinician. It left me more comforted than empowered, a welcome change from the "WE SHALL OVERCOME!" tone used by most books in the genre.

Recommended.

[Angela Blount · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an enlightening memoir for those who don't have personal experience with dyslexia, but who may be trying to understand the perspective of someone with this flavor of neuro-divergence. Hopefully, this could also be an inspiring read for those who can more personally relate to the author's struggle.

Schultz is in the position of someone who wasn't diagnosed until he was well into adulthood. (The catalyst being the diagnosis of one of his sons.) His life as a student was abysmally difficult, as he wasn't able to learn to read until he was 11 years old. And even then, reading has never come easily or enjoyably to him. Yet on some level, the challenge of it seems to have been the driving force that led him to choose writing--poetry specifically--as his career path.

As someone who took longer than expected to catch on to reading, I found the author's love for words both reasonable and relatable. (To my mind, it's harder to appreciate something that comes easily.) Schultz has a warmly articulate way of phrasing things that convey a strong voice, despite his admission of imposter syndrome (which was also relatable.)

A little drawn out at points, but overall a quick and empathy-expanding read.

[Jill · Rating 5 out of 5]

“On the most intimate level of all, the level of self-worth, every dyslexic owns a history of self-rejection and regret. It can be addressed and understood over time, but it cannot be erased. My image of myself as a dummy is neurologically, phonologically, linguistically wired into the core of my being. It is my phonetic code. When I read, this image of myself reads along with me, interpreting each word, each phoneme. If my ambition as a writer is to overcome this image, it is a futile one.” (Schultz 76)

As a teacher, I ache while reading these sentences. There’s truth in this passage for every reader—our self-image “reads along with” us—but this is especially resonant for those with learning disabilities. Schultz’s book has increased my desire to better support and understand those who learn differently.

[Roberta Lynne Ruben · Rating 5 out of 5]

Being dyslexic, Jewish and about the same age as the author, I found this a wonderfully honest autobiographical sketch of his life as a poet and teacher. The life long anxiety related to reading out loud, the difficulty he had learning foreign languages, especially Hebrew, made me realize that at 72, I still have depression and anxiety related to my disabilities. I was 71 when I learned that my dyslexia is real and can’t be resolved through surgery. The author’s struggles made me remember how, as a child, I was always compared to my sister, and other smarter family members.

Highly recommended to dyslexics of every age because it helps you reflect on the life experiences you try to repress.

[TJ · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a melancholic delight! My heart goes to dyslexics who felt alone and helpless growing up. When I was in elementary, I witnessed children fidgeting and stuttering while getting reprimanded by their own teachers as well as teachers who "gave up on them" like the author had described. Other children laughed at them for being "weird" and "dumb". I knew they had difficulties, yet I couldn't comprehend what intellectual disabilities were at that age (especially dyslexia as reading came easy to me). I had always felt guilty for not helping the bullied kids, I wish I knew better and fought for them. I will never thoroughly understand the pain they (and the author) have gone through. This is available on audible, I highly recommend it!

[Bernie Critchley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading about the author’s experiences with dyslexia, and how he discovered that he was dyslexic later in his life. This was similar for me, and many of the challenges he described resonated with me. This led to a lot of self-reflection, as I thought about my own struggles with dyslexia, and frequently put the book down to make notes! I was slightly less engaged with the book towards the end, as Philip talked about being a writer and poet, which I couldn’t relate to, but it was still interesting. Well worth a read for anyone who would like to learn about dyslexia and how it can impact on an individual’s life.

[Mark · Rating 2 out of 5]

Readability 7. Rating 4. Perhaps I came at this the wrong way. I was hoping for insights into a life of a person with dyslexia - and to a small degree, it does provide that - but it is very much more a more encompassing memoir of a seemingly very wounded person who becomes a poet. The title, then, to me was pretty misleading. It was as much about growing up with a bad father, being Jewish, or being a poet as it was about dyslexia, even if all of those aspects of his life were impacted by being dyslexic and not knowing it.