NO SPOILERS
SMERSH wants to damage England. What better way than to destroy their secret agent hero, James Bond? SMERSH hatches a plan. They pick out their prettiest worker and send her to Bond. To sweeten the already honeyed deal, she's carrying a Russian encryption machine. Bond is initially suspicious of this beautiful Russian spy who's defecting to England, but his suspicions are gone once he beds her (moron!). But SMERSH has big plans for Bond, and surprisingly they are not plans to give him endless orgasms...
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My stomach clenched painfully at the thought of reading this book again. I couldn't remember exactly why, but I knew it was going to be bad. In fact, I put off reading this for a day or two, trying to mentally prepare myself for what was coming. It didn't work.
Fleming starts off strong, with what is perhaps the best opening chapter I have ever read. He paints a very ideal, normal scene but laces it with dark and sinister undertones, and he does so beautifully. There's no doubt that Fleming is a great writer.
Bond doesn't even appear in this book until the halfway point. Instead, Fleming uses his first 10 chapters to introduce us to the inner workings of SMERSH (Death to Spies) the Russian counter-espionage organization.
We meet Donovan Grant, a psychopath who was born in Ireland. A serial killer, young Grant starts by killing animals but quickly finds that's not enough for him. After he starts killing humans (always on the night of the full moon) he runs into a bit of trouble. He becomes very interested in working for the Russians, which I guess he sees as an all-you-can-eat buffet of killing and torturing. I thought Fleming did a good job showing how someone like Grant, a killer who enjoys killing and has absolutely no morals works hard to please his Russian masters and actually has to undergo things he doesn't like (school and learning) in order to get where he wants to be (SMERSH's #1 killer).
We meet Rosa Klebb, evil lady torturer. Described as disgusting and "sexually neutral," Klebb is a short, toady, ugly woman who is always described in the most disgusting terms possible so that the reader develops revulsion for her not only based on her actions, but her physical self. Fleming also uses bisexuality to induce "fear and disgust" in the reader, showing that Klebb is a "pervert" who will satisfy her sexual urges with either men or women.
Lastly, we have Tatiana Romanov,(24, brown hair, blue eyes, Bond will be her 4th lover) a stunningly beautiful and innocent and goodhearted member of SMERSH (WTF?). She is just so innocent and fresh and sweet. Even though she works for one of the most evil organizations ever, she's just a good girl who could never hurt anyone.
Tatiana is called up by Klebb and given the good news: she will sleep with James Bond. No matter that she has no idea who Bond is, or the small issue of deciding for herself when and with whom to have sex - she is told:
"You will seduce him. In this matter you will have no silly compunctions. Your body belongs to the State. Since your birth, the State has nourished it. Now your body must work for the State. Is that understood?"
Well, Tatiana (who I feel is not very bright) can't argue with that logic!
Now comes a very hard part for me to read: Tatiana being examined naked. Tatiana being forced to give SMERSH her lovers' names so that they can be interviewed about her sexual talents (or lack thereof) and her subsequent training on how to please a man in bed. I'm shuddering in revulsion even writing this down. It's sick. I hate it. It's degrading and humiliating and disgusting. Especially since Fleming keeps stressing Tatiana's innocent and sweet nature and how she is now looked on as a whore and men just leer at her and joke about her all the time. Vomit-inducing.
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Okay. Now Bond. La, la la, Bond's going soft. Where's the war? Where's the mission? He hasn't been on assignment in a year. He's so bored. Tiffany Case left him and moved back to America (extra points to Fleming for mentioning a past Bond girl and not just "disappearing" her).
Then Bond gets a call from M.
...the bell of the red telephone had been the signal that fired him, like a loaded projectile, across the world towards some distant target of M's choosing. ... M. gestured to the chair opposite him across the red leather desk. Bond sat down and looked across into the tranquil, lined sailor's face that he loved, honored and obeyed.
Bond is told that a young, beautiful spy from Russia who works in the filing office has developed a huge crush on him. From reading his file. The British Secret Service actually buys this load of hogwash, because they can't pass up the opportunity to get their hands on the encryption machine.
Bond is told on no uncertain terms that he is to seduce Tatiana. Please her in bed. Make her fall in love with him. Do whatever he has to do to get that encryption machine! Now, let's examine this a bit:
ANALYSIS:
It's very interesting what Fleming has done here. Both Bond and Tatiana are told to whore themselves for the governments' benefit.
But Fleming shows the differences in the organizations' approaches. SMERSH doesn't give Tatiana a choice. She's told: your body belongs to us. She's cruelly interrogated about her sex life in detail. Her lovers are hunted down and also forced to go into excruciating details about her skills in bed. Then she is physically assessed and given "hands-on" training in how to give men pleasure.
Bond, on the other hand, is first asked by M. if he's still with Tiffany. M. doesn't want to involve Bond in this if he's involved with a woman. Once it's established that Bond is single, he's given a choice. Would he like this mission? Bond agrees, after having a discussion in depth with M. about the dangers, what the mission will involve, etc. etc. (Contrasting with Tatiana who is completely in the dark and also being lied to.) While James Bond is told verbally to make Tatiana happy, seduce her, and make her fall in love with him, he is certainly not stripped naked and forced to have sex with multiple women in order to assess his orgasm-giving skills. None of his ex-lovers are questioned.
In this way, while Bond and Tatiana are kind of in the same situation, Fleming is showing us that England = good and Russia = evil. And women = should be treated like objects, and men = have agency and can be trusted to make their own choices.
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VOMIT INDUCING #2: When Bond first meets Tatiana, he's buck-naked and she's in bed wearing only a ribbon around her neck and some stockings. They have some cute banter and then have sex.
My problem? Two male SMERSH operatives are taping the whole thing through the huge mirror wall. It's also implied that they are really aroused and possibly masturbating while doing this.
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James Bond makes a good friend in Turkey. A friend named Kerim. This charming individual is a rapist and a racist. I despise him.
Here are some excepts:
By good luck, I had taken a few minutes off to relax on the couch over there with a young Rumanian girl who still believes that a man will tell secrets in exchange for love. The bomb went off at a vital moment. I refused to be disturbed, but I fear the experience was too much for the girl. When I released her, she had hysterics.
Here's a dose of his views on Turks:
That is the only way to treat these damned people. They love to be cursed and kicked. It is all they understand. It is in the blood. All this pretence of democracy is killing them. They want some sultans and wars and rape and fun. Poor brutes...
Wow. Are you ready for this one?
All women want to be swept off their feet. In their dreams they long to be slung over a man's shoulder and taken into a cave and raped.
Or the time he kidnaps that woman, strips her naked, chains her to his table, feeding her scraps and making sure that she knows "who is master." When released (Kerim is slightly embarrassed his mother finds out he's got a naked slave-woman chained in his kitchen) she won't leave him and has fallen in love with him. I'm not joking, this whole scenario really happens in the book.
He also has the wonderful idea of taking Bond to visit his Gypsy friends. There, two women are fighting each other to the death over the chief's son.
Of course, there's lots of rending of clothes and bared breasts and biting and stuff. All the men look on hungrily.
Unfortunately, this delightful spectacle is cut short by an attack. After it's all over and the smoke is cleared, the Gypsy chief is like, "Bond. You could be useful to us. Why don't you come live here to kill for me and tame my women?" Bond graciously declines and makes a request that both women who fought be allowed to live. He'd hate to see one die! The gypsy king is like, "That's an annoying request, but okay." He also makes it clear that the women "belong" to Bond and that if he ever gets the urge to just pop on by, they will be always sexually available to him for as long as they live. Actually, the exact terms were "until their breasts sag." Charming.
The women aren't consulted at all on their thoughts on this matter. Actually, I don't think they even speak in this book.
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"You won't let me get too fat, James. You won't let me get so fat that I am no use for making love? You will have to be careful, or I shall eat all day long and sleep. You will beat me if I eat too much?"
"Certainly I will beat you."
- Charming.
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Last point: This is the 4th (FOURTH!!!) time in the series that a "Bond girl" tells Bond, "This man/situation is dangerous. You should be careful/suspicious." And this is the 4th (FOURTH!!!) time that Bond just pats the girl on the head and says, "Oh you silly woman. Don't think so much! Ha, ha, ha. So cute." And then promptly gets attacked. You'd think, being a spy and all, he'd FINALLY learn after the 4th (FOURTH!!!) time this has happened that maybe... just maybe... it's worth at least CONSIDERING a woman's opinion when she says, "You gonna die." Grow a brain, Bond!
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Tl; dr - An EXTREMELY TO THE MAX chauvinistic piece of trash with tons of rape, sexual humiliation, women as animals, women as sexual objects, racism, and women as stupid.
UPDATE: THE 1963 FILM WITH SEAN CONNERY.
Wow, this is actually a good movie. When did these James Bond films stop being good spy movies and start becoming campy jokes like Moonraker and Live and Let Die?
Some notes:
1.) What was with Connery smacking Tania around? Unnecessary, unattractive, and not in the book.
2.) In the movies, Bond always has sex with three or four different women. In the books, it's one book: one woman. He's much more promiscuous in the films. In this film he has sex with Sylvia at the beginning, BOTH the gypsy women (in the book he turned them down when their chief offered them to Bond), and Tania.
3.) I think the movie was pretty faithful to the plot and spirit of the book, minus the whole SPECTRE/Blofeld thing. What the heck was all that about?