"The Worm that Dieth Not..."

by Kerry L. Barger

If anyone who reads my life story can somehow prevent even a single child or teenager from repeating my mistakes and avoid unnecessary future suffering, then my struggles will not have been in vain. Imagine being arrested, handcuffed and locked behind the bars of a large, dark, cold jail. The next day you are forcibly dragged to a high-rise building and thrust into a 4'x 8’ solid steel-walled cell. Your freedom is ripped away, even though you have not been charged with a single crime. The prison guard tells you, “They are going to lock you up and throw away the key!” You are driven to an insane asylum where a psychiatrist prescribes shock treatments. The first electric voltages pass through your brain, and your heart stops. You are revived, then given a series of nine more ECT treatments without anesthesia. Each one feels like a sledge hammer to your head. You remain confined indoors and drugged for months. Then one day you are told you can go home and to “Have a nice life!” This is my story. --Kerry Barger

Genres: Mental Health, Nonfiction, Mental Illness, Biography

226 pages, Nook

First published September 1, 2010

About the author

For FREE book offers, visit the author's website at https://sites.google.com/site/kerrylb...

From the Author: "I am a native Texan and proud of it. My family's heritage in the state predates the American Civil War when they came to Texas on horses and in covered wagons to homestead the land. One of my great grandparents was a Native American Blackfoot, a genetic fact that some believe explains my intolerance for injustice and hard liquor. My daughter was awarded a college scholarship a few years ago by the Daughters of the Republic of Texas, the oldest patriotic women’s organization in Texas. The Wright brothers of Kitty Hawk, President Grover Cleveland, and General Robert E. Lee are all listed in our family tree.

After working for 30 years in the state's mental health care system, I have since retired and visited ancient cultural sites in the US, Mexico, and Europe, while researching ancient biblical mysteries and writing a few very controversial books. Most readers appreciate them, but some despise what I have revealed with a passionate fervor. I am just grateful that we all have the freedom to openly express our opinions and ideas fearlessly.

The chapters within each of my books can potentially provide at least one or more answers to some of your own personal, fundamental questions. I hope you find them entertaining, as well." --Kerry L. Barger

"Elohim: Ancient Science Fiction or Biblical God?" offers an unconventional explanation of mankind's origins and biblical literature. (It is definitely not for the 'religious-minded'.)

"Elohim II: Ascension of the King" is the science fiction sequel. It was released in February of 2014.

"An American Holocaust: The Story of Lataine's Ring" details events of the worst school tragedy in U.S. history. My mother's cousin and childhood playmate was killed in the catastrophe.

Not long ago, I received a personal message from a Facebook friend who recently subscribed to my Author's Fan Page. She wrote: "I have just finished reading An American Holocaust and it brought me to tears. I honestly did not know of this tragedy until recently. I grew up in the Midwest a few decades after the event. I suppose you grew up knowing about it. I knew the smell was added to natural gas, but didn't know this event triggered it's important addition. Very touching story and full of personal accounts. I am more appreciative of life having read it. Thank you."

In "High Times and Rough Rides of a Bipolar Addict" - The front page Dallas Morning News article dated March 22, 1969 (entitled "Youth Who Defended 'Pot' Is Committed") is reprinted in its entirety. This book is intended for those who have bipolar family members struggling with sex, drug, alcohol, relationship or any number of other devastating addictions.

Paperbacks under $10 & KINDLE versions of his books are available at http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_nos...
You don't need a Kindle to read Kindle e-books.

Hardcover versions are under $20 at http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/KerryBa...

You can visit the author's website at https://sites.google.com/site/kerrylb...


*(Notice to literary agents, publishers and producers: all applicable rights are open for bid. Contact information is available at the end of the books or via the author's website.)

Reviews

[Kerry Barger]

The following editorial review was posted by Priscilla Estes, a writer from Yardley, Pennsylvania. An Independent Writing and Editing Professional and Director of Christian Life Center and Activities, she was on the faculty of ETSU for twenty-four years. She has authored and co-authored a number of successful publications including "New Orleans Swamp Romp" and "Take Me to The River". A Texas '2-stepper', she grew up in a local rural community of Maryland near Washington College.

"Below are my five recommendations to avoid going insane (like I did) and to avoid insuring that you become some kind of worthless, pathetic, immoral, blubbering idiot in the future."

The cover shows an adorable pre-school cowboy clutching matching six-shooters and grinning at the camera. The Roy Rogers image belies the misery on the pages that follow. What started as a private, therapeutic journal steamrolled into an honest account of a life derailed by grief, drugs, and addictive relationships.

Barger does not apologize, make excuses or ask forgiveness for the way he lived his life. He merely tells it... He chose to take drugs, have affairs and break the law. If this were a novel, he would not be a sympathetic main character. And he'd be the first to agree, describing himself as "moral scum," and his need for love "pathetic."

Even so, Barger's unapologetic denigration of self renders him vulnerable and strangely likeable. After all, he didn't choose his broken, alcoholic family; he didn't choose institutionalization and ten electro-convulsive therapy (shock) treatments at age seventeen; he didn't choose genetic mental illness and a deep, gnawing emptiness inside. But he did choose to devote his life to working with the handicapped in state mental facilities in Texas and to write this book.

Barger's factual style, callous accounts of womanizing and angry outbursts are sometimes uncomfortable to read... The book is a brave chronicle of how not to live and admonishes readers to follow their bliss, go for their dreams, and never give up. (Posted in the US REVIEW)
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TRUBBLE wrote: 5.0 out of 5 stars! This book should be required reading at A.A. and N.A. (Posted on Amazon)

"I was given 'High Times & Rough Rides' by a friend to read because i have a bipolar disorder, a drinking problem and have been a prescription drug abuser since i was a teenager. It is an autobiography by someone I could finally relate to. His stories hit home so hard i had to take another look at how i live my life. The author has been to hell and back again to tell the truth about his life and his recovery. I've heard similar stories all too often during my years working on my own stuff in my AA and NA meetings. I decided to take the author's advice after reading this book. I'm still a recovering addict, but now i'm only addicted to Facebook and drinking CRAZY WATER instead of taking lithium! READ IT !!!"
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Elizabeth B. Waniewski wrote: 4 out of 5 stars! Good book on bipolar (Posted on Amazon)

"He has Bipolar and he knows it. He makes no excuses for his actions. I like the book a lot. It was a real page turner. I didn't want to put it down. Thanks for writing it."

[Books and Brews · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is a descent into madness- a must read if you're working with people who have, or you yourself have, bipolar mood disorder. The story is honest and not pretty. It does not offer resolution; just survival. I would have given it more stars if the author had grammar checked and edited more carefully. Still, I finished the book in 3 hours and could not put it down.

[Michelle Cothrin · Rating 1 out of 5]

I continued reading in hopes of finding a redeeming value for this book, plus I have read another of his books that I did enjoy. However, I got to the end of the book thinking, "what an egotistical jerk."

[Tina Harwood · Rating 3 out of 5]

read in two days. Was nice to see that after all the bad he went through he ended up doing good to help change the system.

[Theresa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting story. I'm always fascinated by issues like this. Educational and enlightening.

[Elka R Gilmore · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent prose

This was a great read. Very informative. I learned more about being bipolar than from other source. Thank you Kerry!
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[Michael Harrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't want to say this book was just interesting... because it is simply a MUST READ for anyone who is dealing with sex, drug or alcohol addiction (or knows someone who is). It is intriguing, insightful, and delves into the private world of a teenager who was unaware of his bipolar nature until he found himself locked away in a cell in a mental institution. It is not for the squeemish or faint of heart. The author's private mental and emotional experiences are described, as his spiritual quest from childhood into later life unfolds throughout his process of recovery. This book should be recommended to be included in the toolkit for anyone in 12-step program. This book would be invaluable for anyone dealing with similar life struggles.

[Michael Harrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't want to say this book was just interesting... because it is simply a MUST READ for anyone who is dealing with sex, drug or alcohol addiction (or knows someone who is). It is intriguing, insightful, and delves into the private world of a teenager who was unaware of his bipolar nature until he found himself locked away in a cell in a mental institution. It is not for the squeemish or faint of heart. The author's private mental and emotional experiences are described, as his spiritual quest from childhood into later life unfolds throughout his process of recovery. This book should be recommended to be included in the toolkit for anyone in 12-step program. This book would be invaluable for anyone dealing with similar life struggles.

[Michael Harrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't want to say this book was just interesting... because it is simply a MUST READ for anyone who is dealing with sex, drug or alcohol addiction (or knows someone who is). It is intriguing, insightful, and delves into the private world of a teenager who was unaware of his bipolar nature until he found himself locked away in a cell in a mental institution. It is not for the squeemish or faint of heart. The author's private mental and emotional experiences are described, as his spiritual quest from childhood into later life unfolds throughout his process of recovery. This book should be recommended to be included in the toolkit for anyone in 12-step program. This book would be invaluable for anyone dealing with similar life struggles.

[Kris Pride-Helm · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book was very disappointing. I was excited by the title but it did not live up to its name. It barely even addressed an addiction, in fact, he is clearly judgmental of alcoholics. I do not doubt that the author is bipolar. I wouldn't be surprised if this book was written in three days during a manic episode. To me, he just isn't very likable... He is arrogant & delusional. I almost stopped reading this book several times but I held out, hoping that he would gain some insight or at least something exciting would happen but it never did.

[Jen · Rating 2 out of 5]

(I received this book as a First Reads Giveaway.)

I was really looking forward to reading this book as I have two family members who are recovering addicts. However, the author's story was very flat- he did not go into much detail of point of view or emotion and basically just told his life story in a fashion such as "I moved here in this year, was in love with this girl, worked here...". It was a quick read, but it left a lot to be desired.

[Jeanne · Rating 2 out of 5]

I felt like this book was a bit self serving and there was no real story here. It just a guy who goes on and on about his messed up life in which he seems responsible for most of the messed up things that happened to him. Its like he tries to justify what an jerk he was because he was a bipolar addict. I kept reading just to see if in the end he did anything to redeem himself and he kind of did when he quit working for the state but it was not enough.

[Kris · Rating 2 out of 5]

Received this book free through Good Reads First Reads. Barely touched on the topics of Bipolar and addiction. I was not impressed in the least.

[Therese]

$0.0

[vivian bryant · Rating 2 out of 5]

Strange story to read

It is interesting but it's hard to tell you why. I couldn't put it down. I couldn't rate it any higher because I didn't figure out the book