Whateverland: Learning to Live Here

by Alexis Stewart, Jennifer Koppelman Koppelman Hutt

An exuberantly, hilariously irreverent guide to life from the hosts of Whatever with Alexis and Jennifer and Whatever, Martha! No one tells it like it is quite like the Whatever duo of Alexis Stewart and Jennifer Koppelman Hutt. Now they share their colorful commentary and edgy common sense on every aspect of life, from food and eating ("Does Talking to Pop Tarts Mean You're Crazy?") to fashion and grooming ("The Devil Wore Palazzo Pants") to cleaning and organizing ("Not a Hoarder, Still a Slob"). You'll see it's okay not to measure up to perfectionistic standards of behavior and achievement at home, at work, and in relationships. Once you level with yourself and lighten up, life can be happier—and a hell of a lot more fun. So what if you're not perfect—whatever! Get the real-deal advice of Alexis and Jennifer in Whateverland. It's definitely not your mother's self-help book.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Memoir, Book Club, Food and Drink, Sexuality, Self Help

264 pages, Hardcover

First published September 9, 2011

Reviews

[Jo · Rating 1 out of 5]

"Whatever" was I thinking? Two bratty adult prima-donnas who think their sass is clever and appealing instead of tiresome and embarrassing. This reads like stream-of-conscious recordings that were transcribed, barely edited and then cut-and-pasted into a cluttered, incoherent format. Uninteresting opinions. Often self-serving, contradictory advice (love yourself but don't overlook all your shortcomings). Repellent confessions. I "sampled" -- some photos have amusement value -- but couldn't punish myself by actually "reading" as intended. Poor Alexis -- resentful of her talented, accomplished mother, slyly whining about all the ways M failed her and yet evidently eager to trade on her celebrity. However, she is right about chutney.

This book is strikingly devoid of class -- go ahead and judge me for that. But it utterly fails to achieve any quality of outrageous, shocking hilarity that might ameliorate that. Schizophrenic comes to mind.

Oh, am I missing the point?

Well, whatever . . .

[Jennifer S. Brown · Rating 2 out of 5]

I am being immensely kind in giving this book two stars. I'm giving it two stars because as horrific as this book is, I couldn't look away. The entire time I read this book, I felt like I was rubbernecking. How can you look away from the disaster that is Alexis Stewart? The horror of her! I don't think I've ever had such a strong reaction to a person I don't know before, but in her tirades of how she is happy going after married men, she thinks it's a fun to cut friends off, how she can't understand how anyone could ever gain weight, well, she's truly unlikeable. Her cowriter is not nearly so depraved and I felt definite sympathy toward her. Her relationship with Alexis is so dysfunctional and comes to a sour end (which really isn't a spoiler as Alexis has been happily parading this fact on the TV morning show circuit).

If nothing else, reading this book will make you feel better about your own life. Because you are not Alexis Stewart. And that's a good thing.

[Renee · Rating 2 out of 5]

Written by Martha Stewart's daughter and side-kick radio host, Whateverland is a mean spirited book spewing the various rants and pet-peeves of both woman (but much more so of Alexis Stewart). These rants are hidden behind self-help tips that anyone going into the first grade would know (ie, bathe regularly, good dental is a must, de-clutter and organize your closet).

Here are a couple examples: (From Alexis Stewart) I love to reject the unasked for and unwanted gifts people give me. It always freaks them out. "NO thank you"; who knew these three little worlds could have such power?

(From Jennifer) I hate it when workmen use my bathroom, it totally grosses me out..I know they have to go and all, but please do your business anywhere else but my house!
If I didn't know better I would think I stumbled onto the book "The Help".

The only thing somewhat interesting was a look into the childhood of Alexis STeward--surprising Alexis was raised very unprivileged (verified by Martha herself), Alexis had to do more chores than most prison inmates, was regularly forgotten to be picked up from her activities-thus driven home by others, was forgotten to be given Easter baskets and had to wrap her own Christmas presents (to name just a few).

She doesn't seem bitter by these great mishaps but feels they have made her who she is. She has stringent rules for maintaining friendships and loves to drop friends when they break the rules on multiple occasions (ie, running very late). What separates Alexis from most of us, is not the emotion of feeling angry at people when they are late, or buy us a stupid gift that clearly says no thought has been given, but the PLEASURE she receives when she can humiliate or hurt someone and completely rid them from her life.

[Lee Anne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alexis Stewart, daughter of Martha, and Jennifer Koppelman Hutt used to do this funny show, "Whatever Martha," where they watched clips from old Martha Stewart shows and snarked about them. They also had a show on Sirius/XM radio. Then Alexis got bored with both, and with Jennifer, and now they no longer are friends or even speak with one another. But just before the bitter end, they collaborated on this book. It's a collection of their opinions on life, food, dieting, fashion, marriage, family, and more, loosely presented as a self-help guide. Both women are funny and bitchy, as you'd expect, but reading this book immediately after hearing JKH in a no-holds-barred interview on "The Howard Stern Show," I felt as if I were searching for clues that revealed why they broke up their friendship. Alexis, perhaps not surprisingly, comes across as very "cunty," a word I heard her use once on her appearance on the Stern show. Jennifer is sweet, but you can see the annoyingly needy side that supposedly drove Alexis away. The book is funny, and I loved hearing the juicy gossip about both of their childhoods (Jennifer's father was in the music industry, and she palled around with Barbra Streisand and Jon Peters; the Beastie Boys and Run-DMC played at her Sweet 16 party), but after a while, the snarkiness wore a little thin.

[Kara · Rating 2 out of 5]

I never read books like this, and I really have no idea why I read this one. I just started flipping through it at work and never stopped. Which I guess says something for it. It is funny. And it does give you an insight into both girls lives. I had no idea who either of them were before I read it and now I know, and I know that I don't think I really like them. They seem to think their life is much harder than it actually is. They swear they aren't super rich, but um...whatever. I believe they tend to define super rich a little differently than most people. They had parents with issues and now they have issues and its all their parents fault!! Whatever, take responsibility for your issues. Your not a mean and grumpy because your parents made you that way. You are mean and grumpy because you wake up every morning and decide to be mean and grumpy! If being chubby is the worst problem you've had in your life, thank God for it.

[Teri Lowder · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was surprised at how many things I identified with these two wealthy ladies. However, none of them were things I would be proud of.

[Sharon · Rating 1 out of 5]

Alexis Stewart... get over yourself!!!

[Lisa P. · Rating 3 out of 5]

I gave this three stars because it is fascinating- but not in the way these two women intended. I have NEVER encountered as cold a fish as Alexis Stewart, in all of my life! She can absolutely be funny with all of her complaining (especially about her Mother- to whom she OWES HER ENTIRE LIFE- as all of her money comes from MS!), but her bitterness must SUCK to live with! (I think she's repressing something- and I also think I know what it is- but- "whatever!") Long live the Ice Princess, but woe would it be to go through life like that!

This Jennifer Hutt woman, on the other hand, is just as messed up (and insecure) but she takes the passive-aggressive route, chirpy and sing-song while saying extremely mean things (as a former fattie who went on a diet- or had the lap-band-which she'd never admit to, I'm sure!)-she says things like: 'Find thin friends. If you hang out with fatties you'll be fat, too!' - even though- for 35+ years SHE was heavy! Nice! (I heard her on Howard Stern, discussing the fact that her and Alexis are no longer friends. Here she went P.A. all over the place, cheerily describing how they 'broke up' 'coz Alexis hates people, and I'm warm!' Way to compliment yourself, sweetie! You're just TOO NICE for everyone. Haaaaa-yeahrrright!) She describes her husband and family as perfect, while all the while saying she's NOT (just to be 'humble')

As an aside, Alexis Stewart was the first person I ever heard say the 'C*nty'....which at the time was borderline shocking, but now I look back thinking: what better source?

A more out-of-touch, self-involved couple of gals you'll never find. Read it and weep (at their lack of self-awareness!) If you turn it into a game though, it's kinda fun.

[B · Rating 3 out of 5]

Whateverland is a collection of thoughts, pictures and advice from two very wealthy women.

Jennifer is likable and it seems like her heart is in the right place, but she is most definitely a woman of privilege. I have a hard time holding that against her since the family we are born into is purely a chance event, but she is lucky enough to have had an obscene amount of money and a lovely family that allows her the security of having all her basic needs met. She has never known what it's like to truly worry about having a home, food, clothes, paying for medical bills or losing her job. For those of us who don't have the luxury of worrying about such inconsequential things as using a public restroom or walking around without a bodyguard, she can be extremely hard to connect with.

Alexis is a different story for me. Although she too has an abundance of resources that allow her to have absolutely no worries - ever - about having food, shelter and (designer)clothing for her and her children, I have to say, her experience of her parents making thoughtless decisions that affect her life is something that registered. Her rough, angry, rigid personality was most definitely molded (at least in part) by her upbringing. I do feel sorry for her. I feel I also understand her a bit. I could never be friends with someone like her and I think many people she meets feel the same way. I think she realizes that, and that can be tough for a person to live with.

[Lorri Steinbacher · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read it in one sitting. Liked it. Am torn because on one hand Alexis Stewart must be such hard person to be friends with, if you even can. On the other hand, I like her unashamed attitude that she is who she is, that she likes to be alone, and that she doesn't seem to put up with bullshit for the sake of appearances. I also think that although she certainly has issues with her mother (who doesn't), she loves her. She got a lot of flak for "exposing" secrets about her mother, but I really just read the anecdotes as funny. Sharp, certainly, but also funny with a very particular type of affection. Not warm and fuzzy, but more grudging admiration.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you liked Whatever Martha then you'll love this! It's hilarious, honest, and I actually learned a thing or two. Both women open up about their diets, how they run their households, and about life in general. I could relate to a lot of it and it made me laugh! LOVED it so you should buy it and then let all your girlfriends read it after you're done!

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

Entertaining but mostly mindless. Now that I know the authors had a falling out, I dislike the book somewhat, because it makes some of Alexis' awful opinions (that previously I thought of as exaggeration) seem all the more real.

If you want to feel better about yourself and to realize everyone is as crazy/dysfunctional as you are, listen to This American Life instead.

[Beverly J. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Great gods what a dismal dance this was, gah.

[Sheila · Rating 2 out of 5]

Guilty pleasure. But after 10 minutes you realize how shallow it is.

[David messner · Rating 1 out of 5]

both authors are extremely UN-likable , ms Stewart more than the other. I did not even bother to finish this , was grateful that it was a library book ,and that I had not wasted money purchasing it.

[Gato Negro · Rating 3 out of 5]

I did not love this book but there were little tidbits of useful information (recipes, tips for organizing closets, etc.) hidden within what amounted to a book of sometimes offensive anecdotes by Martha Stewart's daughter and some other chick whose father was in the recording industry (she is shown in a childhood photo opening Christmas presents with Barbara Streisand which is kind of strange since she mentions how she is Jewish about 1 million times in this book and how "real Jews" do not have Christmas trees, etc.) Martha Stewart and her daughter Alexis (who I did not realize was Martha's daughter until I started reading this book) must have a seriously contentious relationship and I am sure Martha is probably burning every copy of this book she can get a hold of. Not only are there seriously unflattering and judgmental accounts of Martha's behavior but there is offensive material related to overweight people and tips on how to cheat on your significant other without getting caught. (What?) Alexis also refers to women's breasts as "disgusting appendages". Mostly Alexis seems like an angry child who felt the need to embarrass her mother by writing this book.

[Elizabeth · Rating 1 out of 5]

I just saw the most awkward interview ever of the authors on the Today Show and I cannot look away from train wrecks.

UPDATE: The book was a total train wreck on so many levels. Alexis Stewart, daughter of Martha Stewart, reminds me of Chelsea Handler, only a lot less funny and a little more mean. There were parts that were funny and entertaining: Stewart's hyperbolic descriptions of growing up in Martha's house, her tirades against holiday food, her intense hatred of chutney, etc. The rest pretty much consisted of passages like this one:

I love getting rid of friends. It's so much fun. Because usually there's a reason I'm getting rid of them. Like they've done something nasty, which means they're just going to do something nasty again. Or they're annoying, which means they're just going to be annoying again. Or they're chronically late--late to the point where every time you meet them they're forty-five minutes to an hour late. That just means they're not good friends, because they can't show up.

[Linda · Rating 3 out of 5]

OMG, these women are so horrible! They don't even like each other, and they were friends or should I say "friends". But it was fun to read, as long as I don't have to know these very rich, snobby, not even nice to rich parents who support them, daughters. They are aging now, no longer the teenages they seem to want to remain, and it is sad to think they have not learned to appreciate the time
and money that has been spent on them. However, I think someday it will all come back to bite them.

[Kristin · Rating 1 out of 5]

Complete WASTE OF TIME!! Alexis Stewart sounds like a pretty miserable human being. It was AWFUL.

[Susan Longo · Rating 2 out of 5]

I got this to read after I saw that Alexis was nowhere in sight for Martha's big tag sale that she broadcast on tv. Very revealing upbringing - sad gal and neglected -that Alexis. and her friend -or former friend- Jennifer - both of them have such OPINIONS. Their children are now saddled with all their neurotic behavior or something - eating issues for both of them - neither are particularly happy. But of course I like to read about trainwrecks and some insight into why Martha Stewart is so condescending towards most people.

[Donna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just finished reading “WHATEVERLAND - LEARNING TO LIVE HERE” by ALEXIS STEWART and JENNIFER KOPPELMAN HUTT. I read this book while listening to the audible version narrated by DEANNA HURST and CATHERINE GAFFNEY. I really enjoyed this book! It was fun getting to know these reclusive characters. It is part memoir and tell-all and part self-help DIY. Part cookbook, organizing handbook and much more. A fun read that covers dating, grooming, dieting, idiosyncrasies, and much, much more!

[Jenny · Rating 1 out of 5]

Vapid, boring, humor falls flat

I thought it might be interesting to read about Alexis. She's the daughter of Martha but who is she in her own right? Unfortunately the answer is: a bad writer, attempts at humor that had me yawning, mean spirited, and forgettable. This is one of the worst books I've read in a long time. And P.S. There's not even any interesting stories about Martha to save it.

[Laura · Rating 1 out of 5]

Definitely half a star rating. Just two spoiled bitches.

[Sarah D Bunting · Rating 2 out of 5]

Loved Whatever Martha, but this did not age well.

[Jeannine · Rating 2 out of 5]

60% was more than enough... just couldn't finish this book.

[Kerrie P · Rating 1 out of 5]

Nope...

[Lori Trautwein · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book didn't know what it wanted to be and just didn't work. At all.

[Donna Clay · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was pleasantly surprised. Didn't know exactly what I expected but it made me laugh out loud. It made me also wonder how these two evolved into their "sameness". Entertaining!

[Janet · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was a big fan of Whatever, Martha! and really appreciated the snarky, funny comments obviously made with lots a love and affection. What I really appreciate about this book is some of the conclusions you can draw from their anecdotes. Specifically about dating and relationships with men. For that reason I have made my collage-age daughter read some of this book [in between her chemistry]. While they obviously not like you and me, they do have some valuable insights. Moreover, the fact that they are no longer friends is a little sad. They at least recognize their faults and try to deal with them, if necessary. Which, I think, is the whole point of this book

[Dani · Rating 3 out of 5]

Two and a half stars... Enjoyed it but recognize that this is some truly worthless reading. Just two ladies spouting their opinions on anything they can think of. Never heard of either of them or their show before finding this book in the library e-collection. Watched a bit of "whatever, Martha" on YouTube after the fact and was disappointed. It was the title that drew me in. Whateverland. Something about that really appeals to me, that idea of inhabiting a space where you can truly dismiss the things that would bring you down, but shouldn't, because they're not what's really important. Or something like that.