The Modern Fae's Guide to Surviving Humanity

Green Man #0.5

by Joshua Palmatier (Editor), Patricia Bray (Editor), Seanan McGuire (Contributor)

What if the fae were still here, living among us? Perhaps living in secret, doing their best to pass for human? Or perhaps their existence is acknowledged, but they're still struggling to fit in. How have they survived? Are they outcasts clinging to the edges of society, or do their powers ensure success in the mortal realm? Here are fourteen fabulous tales-ranging from humor to dark fantasy-that explore how the creatures of fae are fitting into the modern world.

From a mortal who offers to do internet marketing for Oberon...to a woman bent on reclaiming her baby from the Queen of the fae...to a dyad grove menaced by urban expansion...to a Selkie in need of a new home and career...these are original looks at how the world of the imagination can survive and perhaps even thrive in the everyday mortal lands.

Includes:
Introduction by editors Patricia Bray and Joshua Palmatier
“We Will Not Be Undersold” by Seanan McGuire
“Changeling” by Susan Jett
“Water-Called” by Kari Sperring
“The Roots of Aston Quercus” by Juliet E. McKenna
“To Scratch an Itch” by Avery Shade
“Continuing Education” by Kristine Smith
“How To Be Human™” by Barbara Ashford
“How Much Salt” by April Steenburgh
“Hooked” by Anton Strout
“Crash” by S. C. Butler
“Fixed” by Jean Marie Ward
“A People Who Always Know” by Shannon Page & Jay Lake
“The Slaughtered Lamb” by Elizabeth Bear
“Corrupted” by Jim C. Hines

Genres: Fantasy, Anthologies, Short Stories, Urban Fantasy, Fiction, Fae, Speculative Fiction

309 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published March 6, 2012

About the author

Joshua Palmatier started writing science fiction and fantasy novels and short stories in the eighth grade, when the teacher assigned a one page Twilight Zone-ish short story. He wrote a story about Atlantis. It was from the perspective of one of the inhabitants as he escaped in a spaceship, watching his world being destroyed by water from one of the viewports of the ship. He got an A. Joshua hasn't stopped writing since.

"The Skewed Throne" is Joshua's first published novel, but it's the fourth novel he's written. The sequels--"The Cracked Throne" and "The Vacant Throne"--are now all available. His next series--comprising the novels "Well of Sorrows," "Leaves of Flame," and "Breath of Heaven"--was initially published under the pseudonym Benjamin Tate, but is being released in June 2016 under his real name. He is currently hard at work on the third book in his latest series, "Reaping the Aurora," with the first book "Shattering the Ley" now available and the second "Threading the Needle" due out in July 2016. He's also managed to write a few short stories, included in the anthologies "Close Encounters of the Urban Kind," "Beauty Has Her Way," "River," and "Apollo's Daughters."

Joshua is also the founder of a small press called Zombies Need Brains, which is focused on producing SF&F themed anthologies. There are two anthologies currently available--"Clockwork Universe: Steampunk vs Aliens" and "Temporally Out of Order"--with two new anthologies due in August 2016 titled "Alien Artifacts" and "Were-". Find out more about Zombies Need Brains at www.zombiesneedbrains.com.

Bibliography: Novels:

Throne of Amenkor series:
The Skewed Throne
The Cracked Throne
The Vacant Throne

Well of Sorrows series:
Well of Sorrows
Leaves of Flame
Breath of Heaven (forthcoming)

Novels of The Ley:
Shattering the Ley
Threading the Needle (July 2016)
Reaping the Aurora (forthcoming)

Bibliography: Short Stories:

"Mastihooba" in Close Encounters of the Urban Kind edited by Jennifer Brozek (APEX).
"Tears of Blood" in Beauty Has Her Way edited by Jennifer Brozek (Dark Quest).
"An Alewife in Kish" (as Benjamin Tate) in After Hours: Tales from the Ur-Bar edited by Joshua Palmatier & Patricia Bray (DAW).
"The River" in River edited by Alma Alexander (Dark Quest).

Bibliography: As Editor:

After Hours: Tales From the Ur-Bar (DAW)
The Modern Fae's Guide to Surviving Humanity (DAW)
Clockwork Universe: Steampunk vs Aliens (ZNB)
Temporally Out of Order (ZNB)
Alien Artifacts (ZNB; forthcoming)
Were- (ZNB; forthcoming)

Reviews

[Wanda Pedersen · Rating 3 out of 5]

A collection of short stories, mostly to my taste. To my complete surprise, the first story by Seanan McGuire did not come anywhere close to being my favourite of the batch!

Remarkably few of these authors have books listed in my public library catalogue, so I may not run into some of them again, unfortunately. A couple of them seem to have only contributed to anthologies thus far in their careers, some have only a book or two to their credit, and some must just not be on the radar of the acquisitions dept. of our library. I realize that they can’t afford to order everything!

I guess the point is that some of these authors are just starting their writing careers and that we have good things to look forward to, if this collection is any indication.

[Dev · Rating 2 out of 5]

actual rating: 2.5

As I continue my journey of reading mediocre anthology books just because Seanan McGuire has a story in them. And hers was the first story in this one so it was almost all downhill from there. There was a pretty cool story with a trans werewolf that was second from the end so I guess I'm glad I didn't drop it completely. Nothing really wrong with any of the stories, it's just very hard to introducing both a gripping plot and relatable characters in the span of 5-7,000 words and most authors it seems are simply unable to do it.

Breakdown:

4 star: We Will Not Be Undersold, The Slaughtered Lamb
3 star: The Roots of Aston Quercus
2.5 star: To Scratch an Itch, Crash, Fixed
2 star: Changeling, Water-Called, Continuing Education, How To Be Human,
How Much Salt, Hooked, A People Who Always Know, Corrupted

Which comes out to a technical 2.46 which is why I rounded down. Also I skimmed or DNFed a lot of these so giving 3 stars wouldn't really feel right to me. I'm sure many people would like this book but it takes a lot to draw me into a short story.

[Nighteye · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the very good anthologies with more unknown authors on a fashinating theme.

[E.V. Svetova · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lovely collection - a bit uneven, perhaps, some stories reading more amateurish, but then others ones fully compensate for that with richness and sophistication of true literature. Overall, absolutely enjoyable and thought-provoking.

[Lea · Rating 3 out of 5]

very readable. Especially the first story by Seanan McGuire.

[Carolyn F. · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have only read the story noted below but plan on reading the rest of the anthology.

The Slaughtered Lamb by Elizabeth Bear. You had me at Drag Queen Werewolf. 4 stars. I read this as part of the anthology Magic City: Recent Spells

[Unwisely · Rating 3 out of 5]

Practically every these two are the only two I liked of the bunch. So odds weren't good for this one.

However! Pretty good for a multi-author short story collection! I didn't hate any of the stories, and it made time pass pleasantly, which was it job. (I have started reading kindle books on my phone at the gym. OMG, what sort of weirdo does that???) Not sure it rises to four stars for the universe of all books, but good for what it was.

[Linda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked up this book because I had already read After Hours: Tales from the Ur-Bar, edited by Bray and Palmatier, and had thoroughly enjoyed it.

The Modern Fae’s Guide to Surviving Humanity shorts are written by some established fantasy writers and a few unknowns. Interestingly, two of my favorites turned out to be by a couple of unknowns: To Scratch an Inch by Avery Shade, a tale about a little Fae girl who finds out why it’s not wise to scratch every itch and How Much Salt, a tale about how Selkie are adapting to the invasion of their beaches by humans, by April Steenburgh. I also enjoyed The Roots of Aston Quercus, by Juliet E. McKenna, a tale about dryads who learn that social activism pays and Seanan McGuires’ We Will Not Be Undersold a satirical tale about working for Undermart.

If you are looking for some fantasy to read while waiting for the dentist to get to you, or for the mechanic to get done with your car, you could certainly do worse. And you might even find a new author you want to read more of. I give The Modern Fae’s Guide to Surviving Humanity four stars.

[Earl C · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some surprisingly good stories in this collection. The one major disappointment for me, was Seanan McGuire's "We Will Not Be Undersold". I bought the collection both because she recommended it and because she had a story in it. Sadly, I was was unimpressed with her entry. On the bright side, the rest were all very engaging and some were downright great.

To be fair, I think my expectations are very high. I've enjoyed her Toby Daye series a great deal, Discount Armageddon was a fun and engaging read and I absolutely love her writing as Mira Grant.

On the whole the collection averaged from 2 to 5 stars with several strong entries in the 4 star category. Well worth the read if you enjoy urban fantasy and stories about the Fae in particular.

[Wealhtheow · Rating 3 out of 5]

A collection of stories centered on the idea of fey creatures dealing with the modern world. My favorite was by far Jim Hines's "Corrupted," followed by Kari Sperring's "Water-Called" and SC Butler's "Crash." I really wanted to like Elizabeth Bear's "Slaughtered Lamb" because there were so many character and world-building concepts there that I loved, but the execution itself didn't work for me. My immediate reactions to each short story can be found in the "status updates" section.

Overall, this was a much better collection than I'm used to reading. There wasn't a stinker in the bunch (which is horribly rare!), and a few were very good.

[Melissa J. Katano · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another solid anthology put out by Joshua Palmatier and Patricia Bray!

The stories run the gamut from light hearted to down right creepy. One of my favorite stories was by Jean-Marie Ward.

If you like urban fantasy, but don't want to read a novel right now, this is a fantastic alternative.

[Kat · Rating 5 out of 5]

A collection of clever stories combining fae in different forms with our reality.
I've already started reading some of these authors and look forward to finding more by others.
All around a very cool anthology, I recommend it!

[Jai · Rating 3 out of 5]

(review originally posted here)

This is an anthology of short stories that I bought while I was at Lunacon earlier this year. The concept behind each of the stories is how fae creatures may have adapted to modern times. I guess you can say all urban fantasy explores this idea, but these stories really focus on the clash of cultures and creative ways a square peg can fit into a round hole.There are fourteen stories in this book and I don't plan to give away spoilery details to any of them, so this review is going to be really brief overviews and impressions of each story.
 
1) We Will Not Be Undersold by Seanan McGuire - This story centers around big-box store Undermart. Regular-guy Dan is an employee dating Nimh, one of the junior managers, and all is well until he begins to notice odd behavior at work. This was a quick, cute, tongue-in-cheek read and a good one to start anthology on a light note. It feels very different from what I've read from Seanan McGuire before. There's something of a young adult air to it.
 
2) Changeling by Susan Jett - Marisol, a new mother distraught over complications during her son's birth, discovers how the fae have adapted to New York when her midwife remembers just where she saw the birthing nurse before. A hero's journey story that has a few familiar folktale elements and a thought-provoking ending.
 
3) Water-called by Kari Sperring - Jenny is some sort of water spirit or elemental that has fed on humans that have fallen into her canal for centuries. Lately the bodies have been leeched prior to their dumping and Jenny is forced to deal with the hunter infringing on her territory. This is a story set in the nighttime, with a main character that is far removed from human concerns and emotions. She is a predator -- ancient and terrible. I enjoyed the tangible descriptions of the canal and its surroundings and everything to do with Jenny. Where this story went wrong for me was the 'hunter' character.
 
4) The Roots of Ashton Quercus by Juliet E. McKenna - Another story with fae as the protagonist, but this time with less predatory concerns than the last story. It is about a grove of dryads that have discovered that their trees are about to be razed for a new road. I liked the solution they came up with and how their group dynamics played out within the story.
 
5) To Scratch an Itch by Avery Shade - This time the fae in question is a little girl named Avery Sky who was told she had to abide by three rules, and one of them has to do with telling her parents if she ever got an itch between her eyes. This is what happens to Avery when the itch finally comes. This was a sweet story about childhood. I liked that the mystery behind the itch rule is revealed to the reader at the same time it is to Avery.
 
6) Continuing Education by Kristine Smith - Lee Kincaid is enrolled in an MBA program at the Old Campus of Monckton College, but her school's professors are more than they appear to be. This was a mostly straightforward tale, but touches on the idea of the symbiotic relationship between the fae and humans.
 
7) How To Be Human™ by Barbara Ashford - A jaded "menopausal male fairy" uses his charismatic powers to make money off of self-help seminars. I liked both the premise and the link between power, age, and cynicism in the fairy world.
 
8) How Much Salt by April Steenburg - This is a story about a selkie named Dylan who is forced to go inland because of the way humans are encroaching on the sea shores. The story revolves around where he ends up. I was mildly amused by this one but wouldn't have minded if it had gone further.
 
9) Hooked by Anton Strout - Hooked is the sort of story that changes as you read it. It starts off with a man knocking on a door because of a flyer, takes a little turn I wasn't sure I liked, veers into something darker, and then twists and lands elsewhere. Hmm. The destination was OK, but I liked the journey there more.
 
10) Crash by S. C. Butler - A female trader hears a rumor about leprechauns on Wall Street and follows up on it. This left me with a feeling like I'd been gently nudged to imagine some twisted humor in some real world events.
 
11) Fixed by Jean Marie Ward - Jack Tibbert starts off as a cat and is taken to an animal shelter where trouble ensues. This was another story that felt decidedly YA since the narrator, Jack, is a teenage boy and definitely notices the teenage girl who picked him up. There was a good sense of urgency and action in this one, but I could guess where the story was going.
 
12) A People Who Always Know by Shannon Page & Jay Lake - A sort of cloak and dagger story that reveals political fighting between older traditionalists and younger upstarts among the fae. I always like stories that have something of a battle of wits in them so I liked where this went, but I wish there was more to this.
 
13) The Slaughtered Lamb by Elizabeth Bear - I think The Slaughtered Lamb was one of my favorite stories in the anthology in terms of the world building. It had that gritty UF style, and a New York City where magic overflow means there's a "liaison between the real world and the otherwise one". This is conveyed to us through the eyes of a transvestite werewolf with achy feet. I liked the characters more than what was actually going on, mostly because the action was quickly dealt with. The characters lingered longer. Yup, another I wanted to continue.
 
14) Corrupted by Jim C. Hines - This was (in my mind) the darkest of the stories, so this book closes on a very different note from which it began. A fairy whose job is protecting humans from those of her own kind, has to pay a high price to keep people safe. I thought this was very grim.
 
Overall: I think my reaction is on the middle ground when I look at the anthology as a whole. There were bits and pieces of each story that sparked my interest but I didn't find a story that really burned itself in my brain. All of these stories stood alone just fine (if they were companion stories to a series, I couldn't tell), but there were a few stories here whose worlds I wouldn't mind revisiting - Elizabeth Bears', Shannon Page and Jay Lake's, and April Steenburg's, in particular. Many felt complete and satisfying as they were (Susan Jett's, Juliet E. McKenna's, Barbara Ashford's, Seanan McGuire's and a few others), then there were the 3 or 4 stories that felt a little flatter than the rest. These focused on the premise of the fae creatures surviving among humans but I didn't really notice other elements to them. The stories that incorporated some sort of growth and/or inner conflict, or conveyed the adaptation while telling a bigger story were the most memorable for me.

[David H. · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a fun theme and title for an anthology, though it pretty much just works out to "urban fantasy." My favorites were probably Juliet E. McKenna's "The Roots of Aston Quercus" and Jean Marie Ward's "Fixed," but honestly, this felt like a pretty average anthology, and just about everything else felt a bit ill-thought-out (Elizabeth Bear's "The Slaughtered Lamb" was oddly disappointing due to how she structured it, and a few others either had anticlimactic endings or had elements that bored me).

[Andrew Ahn · Rating 4 out of 5]

The first ZNB novel I read with some of my favorite authors like S.C. Butler and Elizabeth Bear. I love to look at other people's philosophies on what/how Fairies are and do and many of these stories have fun viewpoints. Are all the stories to my liking? I don't believe any anthology can accomplish that feat. But most are enjoyable to say the least.

[Kate · Rating 2 out of 5]

I think this anthology could be better named, as it is about faeries living in a modern world, and not really particularly a guide to living in amongst humans. I was also underwhelmed by most of the stories, which is sad as I generally like quite a few of the authors.

[Alan · Rating 4 out of 5]

the concept of the anthology is amazing and definitely makes this worth reading. the book is filled with good stories, some bland ones and plenty of really amazing ones that make u wish they were part of a series. definitely recommend

[Hilliary · Rating 4 out of 5]

Couple of fun short stories here!

[Malvika · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 stars to Were s 2.5. Great idea but incomplete and inconsistent execution.

[Bookymonster · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love short stories. And these were so imaginative. Some sweet, some scary, all magical in their own way. Just great!

[LaShawn · Rating 4 out of 5]

For “We Will Not Be Undersold” by Seanan McGuire

[Jessica Lerbs · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed almost all of the stories, and there were a few authors I'd like to find more from.

[Christopher Gerrib · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have never read any of the works of J. R. R. Tolkien. Besides that fact that this admission may force me to give up my Official Nerd ID Card, this should tell you that I am not a fan of fantasy, epic or otherwise. However, since I knew several of the authors in this book, I decided to give it a chance. I’m glad I did.

The conceit of the anthology is that traditional fantasy characters, elves and the like have to survive in the modern day. This keeps the epic down to a low roar.

The first story out of the shoot is Seanean McGuire’s “We Will Not Be Undersold,” which is a wonderful tale of selling one’s soul (perhaps a bit too literally) to one’s work. Anybody who’s ever stepped foot in a “big box” discount store would appreciate this gem.

“Changeling” by Susan Jett is a fascinating story of a mother’s love, and it’s followed by “Water-Called,” a story of science and fantasy intersecting in the form of a water fairy. “The Roots of Aston Quercus” marries the old concept of dryads with urban renewal and modern environmentalism. Avery Shade’s “To Scratch an Itch” proved to be a fine coming-of-age tale.

The next story in the line-up, Kristine Smith’s “Continuing Education” was a story I had the privilege of hearing the author read at a Chicago-area convention. It was unique in that Smith told her story from the point of view of a normal human, not (as in the other stories) from a fae. This was bookended nicely by Barbara Ashford’s “How To Be Human ™,” which was the story of a fairy trying to make a living as a motivational speaker to humans.

Anton Stout’s story “Hooked” proved to be an interesting twist on a detective story, set in New York’s Central Park. This was followed by S. C. Butler’s story “Crash,” also set in New York, which told the tale of what really happens if you get hold of a leprechaun’s treasure.

“Fixed” by Jean Marie Ward was an interesting tale with a surprise ending, discussing the downsides of being able to change from animal to human form. Elizabeth Bear, one of the most prolific authors in SF and Fantasy, contributed a neat story called “The Slaughtered Lamb” which mixed traditional fantasy and very non-traditional gender roles. Closing out this anthology in strong fashion was my friend Jim C. Hines, going darker than his novel-length work with a short story called “Corrupted.”

All in all, a very solid collection, and well worth your time, even if you don’t read fantasy.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this actually a week or so before the release date, and alas, I don't have my copy in front of me (it hopefully has made a trip to a signing or so, and I waiting for it to return). So in fairness, I know the editors, and know at least one of the authors (and have met one or two others in passing at other book signings).

That said, this is a strong anthology. I would never class it as OMG! You will love every story and will not put it down, because as with every single anthology on the market, there are some strong(er) stories then others. The editors did a good job getting a representation of fantasy authors, and a representation of fae, so, you want a book entirely a certain fae species, go elsewhere.

The stories within do provide a nice range of emotional tones as well, ranging from the light to dark, sorrowful to playful.

All over all this collection well worth the read - a great spring opener. Just to get you wondering who exactly that was you passed on the nice warm day walk, anyway.....

[Shazza Maddog · Rating 4 out of 5]

A collection of short stories which take place in the here and now, involving the fantastic. Each story offers a glimpse into another world, some of which I'd love to go back to, or see more of, by the author's skills.

I won an autographed copy of this book, and am very pleased (and hate that it took so long for me to read it). There are some very delightful stories in the collection! My favorites include the shapechanger stories, "Fixed", "How Much Salt", and "The Slaughtered Lamb" (the last title made me laugh out loud, because of the reference to one of my favorite movies).

The other stories include a Wall Street trader searching for a leprechaun, the reason why Big Box stores are so popular, a woman who thinks the fae may have stolen her newborn son and a fairy who works for the FBI, taking down those of her people who've been corrupted by iron and the other poisons in our world. Each story is its own little world, and all of them are fun.

I'll be looking for more works from these authors!

[Renee King - Hooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

An absolutely delightful trip through the world of the fae. Come join fourteen journeys that take you down paths you've never traveled before, some bright and sunny and some dark and deadly, but all with a flavor of their own.

These offerings are as varied as the authors who wrote them. I won't list a favorite when they all leave you with a different sprinkling of spice in your mind. I will say I personally enjoyed them all. The only downside I will mention is it ended too soon. So enchanting to read such gratifying adventures.

I know when you decide to make a book of others' stories the task of picking what you consider the best must be a very difficult task indeed. Not one I would relish myself, however Mr. Palmatier and Ms. Bray make the task look easy.

The only thing else I can say is "Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!"

God bless.

[Fran Jacobs · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a real mixed bag of stories. The majority are ok, interesting, but not particularly amazing, though some have made me laugh, in places. A couple were good, showing imagination (the faerie as a life guru for instance. that was interesting and amusing) A couple were poor (making me wonder how bad the rejected stories must have been!) Only one stood out, Kari Sperring's story of Jenny Greenteeth. That was excellent. Vivid, beautifuly described, dark, the only story that I wasn't indifferent to. It was the only one that really seemed to show any knowledge of faerie mythology, and avoided all the typical faerie traditions (fear of iron, beautiful creatures) and so on.

A disappointing collection, overall. It passed the time, and Sperring's story was excellent, but it wasn't something i would recomend beyond people reading that one story.

[Amber · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked this up while wandering a local bookstore that I like supporting. It had potential to be amusing and I haven't really read that many urban fantasy books that had fairies or really any fae creatures besides werewolves and vampires in a very long time. What I found was interesting, and amusing. Some writing and stories were much more captivating than others, but overall, the anthology is a good one. My two favorites are Changeling by Susan Jett and To Scratch and Itch by Avery Shade.

Changeling covered a topic that has always interested me; how do the fae actually switch out or steal infants. I loved the way Ms. Jett described the emotions of the human mother in this story.

To Scratch an Itch followed a young girl and her trying to figure out her and her family's place within the world. It's a sweet, well-written story and I will have to watch for more work by Shade.

[Taldragon · Rating 4 out of 5]

What if the fae were still here, living among us? Perhaps living in secret, doing their best to pass for human? Or perhaps their existence is acknowledged, but they're still struggling to fit in. How have they survived? Are they outcasts clinging to the edges of society, or do their powers ensure success in the mortal realm? Here are fourteen fabulous tales-ranging from humor to dark fantasy-that explore how the creatures of fae are fitting into the modern world.

From a mortal who offers to do internet marketing for Oberon...to a woman bent on reclaiming her baby from the Queen of the fae...to a dyad grove menaced by urban expansion...to a Selkie in need of a new home and career...these are original looks at how the world of the imagination can survive and perhaps even thrive in the everyday mortal lands.

[Jess Mahler · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reactions to this book are going to range from 'meh' to 'OMG' depending on how you like your fae. As someone who enjoys exploring new takes on the classic fae, this hit the spot. My fave is definitely "The Slaughtered Lamb" (yes, it's werewolf. Do you have idea how hard it is to find and ORIGINAL werewolf story these days????) but there were a number of other good stories as well. I especially liked seeing the creativity of the authors as they each explored a different take on how the creatures of Faerie might fit into the modern world.

As with all anthologies, some stories are strong than others and YMMV.