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My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife: A One-Year Experiment...and Its Surprising Results
Author Sara Horn always admired the Proverbs 31 wife, but when she became a busy writer and mother, she deemed this model to be dated and impossible. Or is it? Join Sara as she heads into a one-year domestic experiment and offers full access to see if this biblical model can be embraced by a modern woman―even one who can’t sew. With humility and humor, Sara sets out to pursue the Proverbs 31 characteristics through immersing herself in all things domestic, but when her family's situation changes and she must return to a full-time job, she's forced to look at the Proverbs 31 woman with a whole new viewpoint. Through it all, she and readers discover: This thought-provoking, surprising, and entertaining personal account will inspire women to try their own experiments in living out God’s purpose for their lives.
208 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2011
61 people are currently reading
1398 people want to read
About the author
Sara Horn
11 books41 followersSara Horn is passionate about encouraging women. Through her books, she writes to share honest life wrapped in biblical truth and challenges women to live out the same.
An award-winning writer, Sara has published numerous articles and more than six books in her decade-long career. She is also the founder of Wives of Faith, a military wives ministry she began in 2006 when her husband prepared to leave for his first deployment to Iraq as a Navy reservist.
Sara's first book, A Greater Freedom: Stories of Faith from Operation Iraqi Freedom, was written with Oliver North and received a nomination for a Gold Medallion, the highest honor given in Christian publishing.
Since then she has focused on subjects very close to her heart as both a military spouse and wife and mom including the book GOD Strong and the Bible study, Tour of Duty. Her purpose as a writer is to encourage women to seek God in every aspect of their lives, whether in the midst of a deployment or every day challenges.
Her most recent book, My So-Called Life as a Submissive Wife, released in 2012 as the sequel to her most popular book to date, My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife.
Sara has been married to the love of her life, Cliff, for fifteen years, who is currently serving in his third deployment overseas in the last six years and they have one son, Caleb, who is in seventh grade this year. They reside in the Baton Rouge area.
An award-winning writer, Sara has published numerous articles and more than six books in her decade-long career. She is also the founder of Wives of Faith, a military wives ministry she began in 2006 when her husband prepared to leave for his first deployment to Iraq as a Navy reservist.
Sara's first book, A Greater Freedom: Stories of Faith from Operation Iraqi Freedom, was written with Oliver North and received a nomination for a Gold Medallion, the highest honor given in Christian publishing.
Since then she has focused on subjects very close to her heart as both a military spouse and wife and mom including the book GOD Strong and the Bible study, Tour of Duty. Her purpose as a writer is to encourage women to seek God in every aspect of their lives, whether in the midst of a deployment or every day challenges.
Her most recent book, My So-Called Life as a Submissive Wife, released in 2012 as the sequel to her most popular book to date, My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife.
Sara has been married to the love of her life, Cliff, for fifteen years, who is currently serving in his third deployment overseas in the last six years and they have one son, Caleb, who is in seventh grade this year. They reside in the Baton Rouge area.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 110 reviews
February 3, 2016
The title of this book should be Hypocrisy and Why Feminists Can’t Be Proverb 31 Wives.
You can’t call yourself a Proverb 31, if you, like Sara Horn:
-Constantly emasculate your husband and his abilities to take care of the household. (There goes the noble character.)
-Consistently moan and complain how your unemployed husband doesn’t have a job and yet do nothing to encourage or help him (So much for the “She speaks with wisdom” category.)
-Focus on your own desires and wants and get aggravated when family responsibilities get in the way of you accomplishing work.
-Resent the idea that a married woman’s place should be at home taking care of her hard-working husband who provides her with food, shelter, love, and safety
-Expect to be a working wife/mom and still be able to properly take care of your husband
-Resents that your husband’s honorable military service might impact you getting the job of your dreams while he’s unemployed. (So much for bringing him good, not harm. A bruised self-esteem puts a damper on things.)
-Constantly volley for the power in the household and call yourself a Biblical woman when the Bible clearly states that the husband is in charge, and the wife is to submit to him
--Express more joy at having your military husband deployed than having him home
-Take control of the household and insist on working outside the home, yet complain when your husband doesn’t help you around the house because you put a job and other things first before family.
Sara Horn is nowhere near being The Proverbs 31 Wife. You can’t pick and choose which parts of the Proverbs 31 verses you get to do and which you can skip. Since it’s a feminist’s goal to assert herself as dominant and even better than a man and to ‘have it all,’ Sara profits by using Biblical concepts as the Proverbs 31 Wife as her central theme, when in reality, her actions and words and thoughts show the opposite conduct of a biblical wife. I feel sorry for her emasculated husband who probably doesn’t know he has become the female in the relationship while the pants are worn by his shrill, macho, self-centered, and power-hungry counterpart that calls herself his wife and a Martha 31. Try more like Man Hater 31.
You can’t call yourself a Proverb 31, if you, like Sara Horn:
-Constantly emasculate your husband and his abilities to take care of the household. (There goes the noble character.)
-Consistently moan and complain how your unemployed husband doesn’t have a job and yet do nothing to encourage or help him (So much for the “She speaks with wisdom” category.)
-Focus on your own desires and wants and get aggravated when family responsibilities get in the way of you accomplishing work.
-Resent the idea that a married woman’s place should be at home taking care of her hard-working husband who provides her with food, shelter, love, and safety
-Expect to be a working wife/mom and still be able to properly take care of your husband
-Resents that your husband’s honorable military service might impact you getting the job of your dreams while he’s unemployed. (So much for bringing him good, not harm. A bruised self-esteem puts a damper on things.)
-Constantly volley for the power in the household and call yourself a Biblical woman when the Bible clearly states that the husband is in charge, and the wife is to submit to him
--Express more joy at having your military husband deployed than having him home
-Take control of the household and insist on working outside the home, yet complain when your husband doesn’t help you around the house because you put a job and other things first before family.
Sara Horn is nowhere near being The Proverbs 31 Wife. You can’t pick and choose which parts of the Proverbs 31 verses you get to do and which you can skip. Since it’s a feminist’s goal to assert herself as dominant and even better than a man and to ‘have it all,’ Sara profits by using Biblical concepts as the Proverbs 31 Wife as her central theme, when in reality, her actions and words and thoughts show the opposite conduct of a biblical wife. I feel sorry for her emasculated husband who probably doesn’t know he has become the female in the relationship while the pants are worn by his shrill, macho, self-centered, and power-hungry counterpart that calls herself his wife and a Martha 31. Try more like Man Hater 31.
June 25, 2012
I'm sure that Sara Horn is a very nice woman and I feel badly about giving her book a low rating but here goes: I found her whining really annoying. I also found the fact that her husband is unemployed and not really working at finding another job very off-putting. You have GOT to be kidding me. She writes as if he's pretty damned casual about it. She finally takes a full-time job herself but it doesn't work out. Her husband is deployed with the Navy reserve so there's not much money coming in and she and her son move in with her in-laws. Good grief. Unless you are totally enthralled with reading about the Proverbs 31 woman I would stay away from this one. Sorry, Sara.
January 14, 2013
Made myself finish it - glad it's over. Appreciate the scripture and her intent with living like the Proverbs 31 woman, but did not enjoy this particular book at all.
January 7, 2013
I am not the target market for this book, as I'm not a devout Christian and didn't even remember Proverbs 31 until the line about rubies. But it was in a list of ebooks on sale at kobo.com and Horn's voice was engaging in the preview so I gave it a shot.
It was a quick and reasonably compelling read but I'm docking a few stars for whining, not enough follow through on some of the questions she struggles with (are women supposed to be the workhorses of the family? How do you make this biblical model of being a good wife work when your husband can't find a job?) and repeatedly revisiting but not really answering the question of whether the Proverbs 31 wifely model is outdated and impossible. Unlike Horn I am a feminist and when I read the bible passage in the first chapter the inspiring bits that jumped out at me weren't the sewing and domestic stuff but the business acumen and kindness/caring. I did wonder a few times why she was so focused on meal planning when her husband enjoys cooking and is very good at it.
The parts of the book where Sara Horn was focusing on being a kinder, calmer wife and mother were the most resonant and relevant. Despite our different lives and perspectives, I enjoyed her humour, writing and self-awareness as she struggled with her sometimes conflicting goals as a wife, mother, Christian, writer, and community member.
It was a quick and reasonably compelling read but I'm docking a few stars for whining, not enough follow through on some of the questions she struggles with (are women supposed to be the workhorses of the family? How do you make this biblical model of being a good wife work when your husband can't find a job?) and repeatedly revisiting but not really answering the question of whether the Proverbs 31 wifely model is outdated and impossible. Unlike Horn I am a feminist and when I read the bible passage in the first chapter the inspiring bits that jumped out at me weren't the sewing and domestic stuff but the business acumen and kindness/caring. I did wonder a few times why she was so focused on meal planning when her husband enjoys cooking and is very good at it.
The parts of the book where Sara Horn was focusing on being a kinder, calmer wife and mother were the most resonant and relevant. Despite our different lives and perspectives, I enjoyed her humour, writing and self-awareness as she struggled with her sometimes conflicting goals as a wife, mother, Christian, writer, and community member.
September 13, 2011
I needed to laugh. I needed to remind myself why I reaching for chocolate wasn't the best solution (okay it is) and reading "My So Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife" was a laugh reliever to lighten up my day. Filled with wit and humor, if you ever find yourself having imaginary arguments with the Proverbs 31, at the same time, feeling guilty and yet thinking, Martha Stewart, begone, you will enjoy this humorous, humble and insightful look as the author pursues, study and discovers how far (or close) she and we are sometimes are to the outline of what a Proverbs 31 woman is.
Expressing the same thoughts, feelings and questions, we all have had at some point, this was really an entertaining book to read and share with close friends, and even provoke thoughts for a fun filled bible study of "What is the Proverbs 31 and how close or far are we".
The timing is good particularly for those who find themselves juggling many roles in whatever capacity you may find yourself in and written with a witty style, you'll find yourself laughing and thinking, "that is so what I think or feel".
Whatever role you are playing right now...this is an engaging book to read.
Expressing the same thoughts, feelings and questions, we all have had at some point, this was really an entertaining book to read and share with close friends, and even provoke thoughts for a fun filled bible study of "What is the Proverbs 31 and how close or far are we".
The timing is good particularly for those who find themselves juggling many roles in whatever capacity you may find yourself in and written with a witty style, you'll find yourself laughing and thinking, "that is so what I think or feel".
Whatever role you are playing right now...this is an engaging book to read.
September 30, 2012
Horn brings up a few good points, but the book is overall lacking, in my opinion. It's more like a diary than a book. Only once or twice does she bring up Scripture; most Scripture reference is how she remembers it in her head when she's writing in her diary. A few things were incorrect (e.g., King Solomon did not write Proverbs 31, King Lemuel did—or at least that's the consensus). Most of what she debunks are her own false assumptions about the Proverbs 31 Woman, most of which I either don't hold or have never heard of because they're not anywhere in Scripture. Overall, I think her heart is right, but this wasn't my favorite book in the world, nor was it very interesting.
Maybe it would have been better if I was warned that this was going to be a journal-type book. The book is good if you're into that kind of thing.
Maybe it would have been better if I was warned that this was going to be a journal-type book. The book is good if you're into that kind of thing.
August 8, 2011
Sara Horn decides that her life would be better if she would only be like the Proverbs 31 Woman (Proverbs 31: 10-31). She sets on a year-long journey to see if she can become more like “Martha” everyday. With hilarity, honesty and a hint of sarcasm, Sara proves that the Proverbs 31 Woman isn’t all she’s proclaimed to be. If you’re like me and sick of trying to be something we’re not…then this book is absolutely perfect for you! The truth is that the Proverbs 31 Woman is not real. She’s a proverb.
So, the next time I hear my friends proclaim that they want to be like her, I’m giving them a copy of this book! In the meantime, I’ll join Sara in the real adventures of being a mom & wife.
So, the next time I hear my friends proclaim that they want to be like her, I’m giving them a copy of this book! In the meantime, I’ll join Sara in the real adventures of being a mom & wife.
June 6, 2013
This book started out promising, and then really failed to live up to its stated intention. When I chose a book about a woman trying earnestly to live as a Proverbs 31 wife for a year, I thought it would be in the vein of A.J. Jacobs - with real goals, a game plan, and interesting tidbits and insights along the way. Instead, this book read like Ms. Horn's personal journal, with many references to her thinking about Proverbs 31, but not so many examples of her actually following through on those thoughts. I think this might have been a fun blog to follow, but was ultimately not impressed with it as a book.
March 3, 2013
The joke in our house is that I could be more like the Proverbs 31 woman if I only had the maidservants. So, when I saw this book, I thought, "Hey, maybe this person has some better insight into all of this." And frankly, I'm a bit more than disappointed. The author's tone is whiny, complaining, and never seems to draw any solid conclusions. She seems to jump quickly from one thought to another without truly wrapping up the first one before moving on. The best conclusion she came to was, focus on God first and foremost and you'll become a better wife and mother.
September 26, 2016
I really thought this book would be about how to be a Proverbs 31 Wife the 21 steps to greatness. I was wrong in the best kind of way! This book took you through Sara's personal life and how she challenged her self to be everything a Proverbs 31 Wife is. It was entertaining and I could so feel her pain. How can you do it all with only 24 hours in a day. I think this book is a must read for anyone striving to be the biblical wife we hear about. It really gets to the heart of the matter. I can't wait to read the sequel!
February 5, 2015
This book is hard for me to review. I'm struggling with being painfully honest and being nice (she is a "small time" Christian author after all, and I want to be encouraging of her work). So I shall try to find a balance between the two:
Overall, I enjoyed the book. There were a couple grammatical errors that I found distracting (improper use of parenthetical statements, and randomly switching between past and present tense), but I know that's what an editor is for so I can hardly fault the author for these things. Plus, I'm a grammar snob. I know that. I also know that most people aren't.
I found the content/subject matter of this book intriguing, to say the least. I couldn't identify with the author during much of the book, because she and I have such differing personalities (it sounds like I'm more like her husband). I really liked reading her perspective on everything, because I've often wondered what the inner workings of a business minded/driven woman are like. Does she feel guilty leaving her child(ren) for someone else to care for each day? Is she perfectly fine with it? Does she regret it, or does she just shove past it and get the job done without thinking about it? Sara Horn answered a lot of these questions, and it was refreshing to see how her own perspective of the "stay at home wife" changed over time.
When I became a stay at home mom I struggled with my own identity. Who was I now? What was my purpose in life? Is this what motherhood was really like? I'd gone from earning a decent income in a business setting to wiping tushes and being vomited on and not getting paid a dime for it! It took me several months, but I eventually realized that I was earning something...something so much more valuable than money. I had always planned to be a stay at home mom, and I never looked down on women who chose that path for their life. It was very interesting to read from the perspective of a woman who was once one of "those" women who did look down on the stay at home mom. And, it was rewarding to watch her life change and unfold until she reached a point of realization that she had missed out on a higher calling than that of a businesswoman: being a good wife and mother.
I really appreciated her honesty. She was able to honestly state how self centered she had been in not focusing more on her family, how this life isn't about her. Its not very often that you find a woman (or person) with her personality type who is strong enough to do that!
In the end it was rewarding to see her come to the same place of understanding for her life's purpose that I did.
My hat's off to Sara Horn! I think that overall, she did an amazing job in transforming herself into the "Proverbs 31 Wife." I especially liked the Epilogue, where we discover just how well she can submit her life to God and trust that He will provide for her and her family.
Overall, I enjoyed the book. There were a couple grammatical errors that I found distracting (improper use of parenthetical statements, and randomly switching between past and present tense), but I know that's what an editor is for so I can hardly fault the author for these things. Plus, I'm a grammar snob. I know that. I also know that most people aren't.
I found the content/subject matter of this book intriguing, to say the least. I couldn't identify with the author during much of the book, because she and I have such differing personalities (it sounds like I'm more like her husband). I really liked reading her perspective on everything, because I've often wondered what the inner workings of a business minded/driven woman are like. Does she feel guilty leaving her child(ren) for someone else to care for each day? Is she perfectly fine with it? Does she regret it, or does she just shove past it and get the job done without thinking about it? Sara Horn answered a lot of these questions, and it was refreshing to see how her own perspective of the "stay at home wife" changed over time.
When I became a stay at home mom I struggled with my own identity. Who was I now? What was my purpose in life? Is this what motherhood was really like? I'd gone from earning a decent income in a business setting to wiping tushes and being vomited on and not getting paid a dime for it! It took me several months, but I eventually realized that I was earning something...something so much more valuable than money. I had always planned to be a stay at home mom, and I never looked down on women who chose that path for their life. It was very interesting to read from the perspective of a woman who was once one of "those" women who did look down on the stay at home mom. And, it was rewarding to watch her life change and unfold until she reached a point of realization that she had missed out on a higher calling than that of a businesswoman: being a good wife and mother.
I really appreciated her honesty. She was able to honestly state how self centered she had been in not focusing more on her family, how this life isn't about her. Its not very often that you find a woman (or person) with her personality type who is strong enough to do that!
In the end it was rewarding to see her come to the same place of understanding for her life's purpose that I did.
My hat's off to Sara Horn! I think that overall, she did an amazing job in transforming herself into the "Proverbs 31 Wife." I especially liked the Epilogue, where we discover just how well she can submit her life to God and trust that He will provide for her and her family.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 29, 2013
I had the privilege of meeting Sara Horn when she came to the base chapel to speak to a roomful of military wives (which she is one of.) We as a group had just finished going through her previous book, God Strong, and to meet the author of that fabulous study was quite an honor. She is a warm, gracious woman and the military connection is something that can't be duplicated by the "outside" world.
My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife is not quite as good as God Strong. It reads like a log book or diary without much depth. She struggles with what it means to be a Proverbs 31 wife, and she sets out to "do" the right things. Toward the end, she finally realizes it's not the doing that it happens, but in the "being." It's a heart issue, not a list of accomplishments.
I would recommend this to a young wife, perhaps one starting a marriage AND a military career with her husband. It's a good place to start, particularly if she is new to the concept of the Prov. 31 woman. I have read other books on this subject that contained deeper spiritual applications, but since I know the author, I was able to relate better to her efforts, failures and successes. This book isn't as intimidating as some of the others I have read.
My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife is not quite as good as God Strong. It reads like a log book or diary without much depth. She struggles with what it means to be a Proverbs 31 wife, and she sets out to "do" the right things. Toward the end, she finally realizes it's not the doing that it happens, but in the "being." It's a heart issue, not a list of accomplishments.
I would recommend this to a young wife, perhaps one starting a marriage AND a military career with her husband. It's a good place to start, particularly if she is new to the concept of the Prov. 31 woman. I have read other books on this subject that contained deeper spiritual applications, but since I know the author, I was able to relate better to her efforts, failures and successes. This book isn't as intimidating as some of the others I have read.
October 15, 2011
Oh my goodness! You mean I'm not the only one that isn't the perfect Proverbs 31 wife? This book was such a refreshing take on Proverbs 31. Like the author, most times I read that notorious chapter I end up feeling like I should just beat my head against a wall because there is no way I will ever stack up. Most days it's all I can do to just keep my head above water and I'm not making any progress at all. Reading Sara's experiences with trying to be the perfect Proverbs 31 wife was so freeing for me. It made me realize that I don't have to be perfect, but I shouldn't just give up, I need to at least attempt and strive for better. It was convicting with out being condemning and above all it was filled with refreshing honesty!
January 27, 2013
I really disliked this book. I found the author's voice whiney and found her impossible to please. She wanted her husband to do more, then got upset because he was the better cook and she sometimes failed in that department. I think she missed the point of everything until the very last sentence. I also think that she rushed through the writing of the book when she was in a busy and difficult time in her life (this is described in the book). A big thumbs down from me.
January 24, 2012
I loved this book. Couldn't put it down. So nice to read about someone else struggling to balance everything while wanting the family to be God centered. One I will defiantly be sharing with friends.
July 5, 2012
as much as I wanted this book to be a guide toward being a better momma and wife thru the things I do for my family, it wasn't. simply put, being a faithful daughter of Christ makes me a better mom and wife. and when I put my hope on Him, that's all I need.
March 4, 2013
I liked the book, however it became apparent she and I don't share a lot of the same values. I can't judge the book really based on that though. I'm not sure if I would give it a 3 or a 4...I liked it but some things had me rolling my eyes! Lol ;)
August 10, 2013
This book was terrible! I understand the author's point was to learn something from Proverbs 31 so it would have been better if she had actually learned something. I only finished it to find out if there was something redeeming at the end. Don't bother.
March 25, 2012
Easy and quick to read but felt scattered, there was no real flow. Gave me things to think about though.
June 2, 2013
Funny, but not incredible. Made me think some, but didn't really work for a Bible Study like we had hoped.
July 7, 2011
MY REVIEW:
This is one of those books that I had such mixed emotions about. First I liked it, then I didn't, then I did again. It's also a bit different than any other book I have read - not fiction, not really biography, not Bible study...more like reading someone's diary which in turns make you think about your own life.
I recommend this book for those who want another perspective on the Proverbs 31 Woman or for those who think that she's too old fashioned to apply to their lifestyle. While I don't personally agree with every thing that Sara said or concludes with...I appreciated her light-hearted, yet very thought provoking, and personal look at this unnamed woman and how we can learn from her even in today's culture. It was a fun read and made me feel like I had a new friend as I eavesdropped on Sara's life for a whole year. For women looking for a relaxing yet thoughtful read, this is for you.
BOOK OVERVIEW:
Author Sara Horn always admired the Proverbs 31 wife, but when she became a busy writer and mother, she deemed this model to be dated and impossible. Or is it? Join Sara as she heads into a one-year domestic experiment and offers full access to see if this biblical model can be embraced by a modern woman—even one who can’t sew.
With humility and humor, Sara sets out to pursue the Proverbs 31 characteristics through immersing herself in all things domestic, but when her family's situation changes and she must return to a full-time job, she's forced to look at the Proverbs 31 woman with a whole new viewpoint. Through it all, she and readers discover:
what it means to be a godly woman and a wife
how investing in family and faith refines priorities as a spouse and a parent
how mistakes are opportunities for growth
This thought-provoking, surprising, and entertaining personal account will inspire women to try their own experiments in living out God’s purpose for their lives.
This is one of those books that I had such mixed emotions about. First I liked it, then I didn't, then I did again. It's also a bit different than any other book I have read - not fiction, not really biography, not Bible study...more like reading someone's diary which in turns make you think about your own life.
I recommend this book for those who want another perspective on the Proverbs 31 Woman or for those who think that she's too old fashioned to apply to their lifestyle. While I don't personally agree with every thing that Sara said or concludes with...I appreciated her light-hearted, yet very thought provoking, and personal look at this unnamed woman and how we can learn from her even in today's culture. It was a fun read and made me feel like I had a new friend as I eavesdropped on Sara's life for a whole year. For women looking for a relaxing yet thoughtful read, this is for you.
BOOK OVERVIEW:
Author Sara Horn always admired the Proverbs 31 wife, but when she became a busy writer and mother, she deemed this model to be dated and impossible. Or is it? Join Sara as she heads into a one-year domestic experiment and offers full access to see if this biblical model can be embraced by a modern woman—even one who can’t sew.
With humility and humor, Sara sets out to pursue the Proverbs 31 characteristics through immersing herself in all things domestic, but when her family's situation changes and she must return to a full-time job, she's forced to look at the Proverbs 31 woman with a whole new viewpoint. Through it all, she and readers discover:
what it means to be a godly woman and a wife
how investing in family and faith refines priorities as a spouse and a parent
how mistakes are opportunities for growth
This thought-provoking, surprising, and entertaining personal account will inspire women to try their own experiments in living out God’s purpose for their lives.
May 27, 2016
While I identify with Mrs. Horn in many ways and enjoyed her writing and sense of humor, ultimately I felt there was something missing from this book. I think it was that even though the theme was built in by the scriptural basis, she never really took it anywhere. In the end, she did come back to doing less outside work and focusing more on family, but the only real lesson she seems to have reached is that she needs to be more God-fearing—which she never defines. She seems confused about what comes from God’s prompting her and what comes from her own motivations. That's not a criticism, just a note that she suffers from the same malady as all humans, but this problem deserves more attention than she gives it. She also clearly rejects a lot about what the Bible says about a woman’s role—a struggle I think many, many of women have—but at the same time, she has made Christianity the center of her identity as a woman, both personally and professionally. It’s more than a little cherry-picking. That’s not necessarily a bad thing—we all do it—but she seems unaware that she’s doing it and doesn’t address it at all. I guess the theme running through my criticism of Mrs. Horn’s book is that there’s enough that’s good here to make me want more depth, but the book stays resolutely on the surface. It reads more like a series of blogs than a coherent study.
In the end, though, I think Mrs. Horn has probably struck the right tone for her intended audience. I am likely older than her average reader and I come from an academic background. When I think of many of the women I know who are part of the Proverbs 31 revival that seems to be going on, I think most of them would enjoy and profit from this book.
Also, whatever my quibbles, they are not enough to keep me from reading another of Mrs. Horn’s books in the near future. In fact, I'm looking forward to it.
In the end, though, I think Mrs. Horn has probably struck the right tone for her intended audience. I am likely older than her average reader and I come from an academic background. When I think of many of the women I know who are part of the Proverbs 31 revival that seems to be going on, I think most of them would enjoy and profit from this book.
Also, whatever my quibbles, they are not enough to keep me from reading another of Mrs. Horn’s books in the near future. In fact, I'm looking forward to it.
September 14, 2011
My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife by Sara Horn offers hope to every woman who has ever felt intimidated by that paragon of female virtue. Horn, the wife of a of a Navy Reservist, is a free-lance writer who has always taken pride in her work, which leaves her at odds with the Martha Stewart of the Bible in Proverbs 31 who cooks the meals, sews the clothes, keeps the house clean, harvests crops, sells property, makes money, and has her husband bragging up her at the city gate while her children call her blessed. Horn is not the traditional Christian woman who stays at home, is a genius in the kitchen, and homeschools her children, and proudly so! So her quest to try and live up to this example seems almost humorous, but Horn is sincere in her desire to be a better wife and mother by embracing Martha 31, as she nicknames the unnamed woman. But Horn's husband Cliff is a better cook than she is, leaving her often discontented by his enjoyment of cooking for the family, she never manages to sew anything, and the family's circumstances change radically when Cliff can't find a job, forcing Horn to take a job at a college in North Carolina and uprooting the entire family. But what Horn, and readers, learn that it isn't about whether she can master all of Martha 31's talents, it's about whether Horn is using her God-given talents to the best of her ability to bless her husband and child. This is a vital lesson for women like me who have often felt a failure compared to Martha 31 and her seeming perfection. Horn is an engaging writer, keeping the reader entertained whether her plans are wildly successfully or crashing beyond belief. She offers hope for those of us who will never be Martha Stewart or Martha 31 that God loves us just as we are .
July 24, 2015
I'm still not 100% sure how I feel about this book. The author is very honest in her struggles with the Proverbs 31 woman. She is honest in her somewhat-resentment of her because it seems like such an impossible standard...and I think we all feel that way at times. She's honest in her struggles trying to be as much like her as possible...which we all experience some (ok, a lot for me). She's honest in her frustrations with her husband, which we all experience. I appreciate the honesty, don't get me wrong. I would much rather read how hard it is than to read how easy it is to cook every night and sew and run a side business and home-school your kids and give your husband attention and and and... But at the same time, the honesty comes off kinda negative and discouraging at times. In the end, she decides that fearing God and prioritizing relationships rather than actions is the best course. Which I agree with. Overall, it was good, but it didnt give me a burning desire or motivation to drastically change my life to strive to be more like the Proerbs 31 woman, if that makes sense.
September 9, 2011
Proverbs 31 has long been upheld as the standard for the Christian wife. It has also been the source of much fear and trepidation among women who want to be good wives but do not think they have a chance when Proverbs 31 is the plumb line. Sara Horn puts these fears to rest. In My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife, Horn tackles each phrase of Proverbs 31 and provides an interpretation suitable for 2011.
Readers will be relieved to find that this is not another book of rules to live by but rather a humorous account of Horn’s day-to-day life as she attempts to apply Proverbs 31 to her living one day and one concept at a time. Balancing family, work and personal goals can be challenging. Readers will laugh as they discover that Horn’s struggles are their struggles too. They may also find that they are closer to being a Proverbs 31 wife than they ever thought was possible. Through My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife Horn provides a much needed breath of fresh air.
Readers will be relieved to find that this is not another book of rules to live by but rather a humorous account of Horn’s day-to-day life as she attempts to apply Proverbs 31 to her living one day and one concept at a time. Balancing family, work and personal goals can be challenging. Readers will laugh as they discover that Horn’s struggles are their struggles too. They may also find that they are closer to being a Proverbs 31 wife than they ever thought was possible. Through My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife Horn provides a much needed breath of fresh air.
January 22, 2012
Reading the title of Sara's new book instantly grabbed my attention. We all know that good ole Proverbs 31 woman. The perfect wife and mother, the one who hovers in the shadow of
our existence nagging us, I mean calling us to higher standards with her example. It is a love hate relationship with this biblical icon for most I believe.
As it she was for Sara Horn when she decided to face her head on and try to become more like the Proverbs 31 women in a year long experiment.
Sara names her mentor Martha 31 and sets out to learn and grow from her as written in scripture. As a writer, mother, wife and homemaker Sara looks to find the balance in her life that she feels that Martha 31 would be proud of. This is Sara's journey and in the midst of it, advice and ideas for us as she learns more and more how to grow in her relationships with her family and her God.
Perhaps after reading it you too will want to try an experiment like Sara's.
our existence nagging us, I mean calling us to higher standards with her example. It is a love hate relationship with this biblical icon for most I believe.
As it she was for Sara Horn when she decided to face her head on and try to become more like the Proverbs 31 women in a year long experiment.
Sara names her mentor Martha 31 and sets out to learn and grow from her as written in scripture. As a writer, mother, wife and homemaker Sara looks to find the balance in her life that she feels that Martha 31 would be proud of. This is Sara's journey and in the midst of it, advice and ideas for us as she learns more and more how to grow in her relationships with her family and her God.
Perhaps after reading it you too will want to try an experiment like Sara's.
Read
June 17, 2011I guess this one is a little harder for me to review, because I'm probably not the intended audience. I'm not a wife, not about to be a wife, and not really sure I'm ever looking to be a wife. But, it's the story of a wife attempting to live out the Proverbs 31 expectations, as the title pretty much states. She takes the reader through a series of short chapters, each of which recaps an attempt to learn the virtues of the Proverbs 31 wife. With a good mix of humor, humility, and spunk, Horn discovers that while she may never be perfect, she can truly make each day a chance to live her marriage with Godly intentions -- and she learns that her husband comes to value and love her more each step of the way. Quick, cute, touching read, but this is probably one more for the wives, obviously, than the single gals like me.
March 10, 2012
This book was okay. Personally, it was a little religious for my taste, I read this for a book club so it is probably not something I would have chosen on my own. I felt that all of the chapters started the same (I have been thinking about the Proverbs 31 wife . . . ) and I felt some aspects could have been more developed.
I did enjoy reading about someone else who struggles with balancing work, home, children, and hobbies (writing!!) as I have been feeling the same way. I think many times, we, as wives and women find it hard to balance being a good wife and mother while still maintaining some part of our own identity. Add working full time to that and it is the recipe for feelings of failure. Definitely something that I could relate to.
While this book wasn't my cup of tea, I am really interested to hear what my book club thought.
I did enjoy reading about someone else who struggles with balancing work, home, children, and hobbies (writing!!) as I have been feeling the same way. I think many times, we, as wives and women find it hard to balance being a good wife and mother while still maintaining some part of our own identity. Add working full time to that and it is the recipe for feelings of failure. Definitely something that I could relate to.
While this book wasn't my cup of tea, I am really interested to hear what my book club thought.
February 20, 2018
Finding this title perched on the library shelf pleased me. I have been doing a bit of a "Christian wife" reading since I married for the second time, and this appeared to be a light-hearted tale of introspect and insights. But it did not resonate with me AT ALL. It's a "me too" book, attempting to mix A.J. Jacob's "The Year of Living Biblically" with Julie Powell's "Julie and Julia: My Year of Cooking Dangerously". I completed the book because it promised to reveal the author's insights from her "Year of Focused Attention on Proverbs 31". But I really didn't see much humor in the pages. It's probably me.
The author chats about her husband in uncomfortable ways:
"...I have trouble sometimes with resentment and thinking if he only did this or if he only did that, he would have a job by now... Cliff has a lot of wonderful qualities, but I would not consider self-discipline and assertiveness to be in that list. I often feel as if I'm working for both of us, trying to keep myself going as a freelance writing and then trying to encourage him to do...whatever."
"Apparently, the three of us were very dirty last week, because we used every single towel we own. And they were all lying in a pile outside the laundry room door. Normally, this would have been my signal to complain. If you start the laundry, you need to finish the laundry. And my husband does finish the laundry, it just takes him all week, and by the time it's finished, guess what? Yep, there's another pile of laundry to do."
"Sometimes my husband's observation skills drive me crazy. How is it he can ignore that the bathroom hasn't been cleaned in weeks or the stove top has spaghetti sauce splatters all over it, but he can notice a watermark stain on a dark-colored shirt halfway across the house?" (Weeks of dirty bathroom which she uses too...and it's hubby's job to clean it, after finishing the laundry, of course!)
The book doesn't read like a book, more like a blog or personal journal of WHATEVER seems to be on her mind and bothering her that day. The short sections come across as complaining and whining, mostly about meals and finances and her husband. She discusses different aspects of Proverbs 31 but the applications seem contrived, as if done solely for the writing and marketing of the book, and few insights are drawn from her attempts.
"We're so poor." "We are going on a cruise!" "We're so poor." "I purchased airline tickets for the entire family to fly with me to an interview!" "We're so poor." "I'm shopping for new home decorations!"
There were lots of unfinished thoughts. The family looks for a new church and attends one across town. Did they like it? Did they return?
She mentions knitting and sewing as a skill to learn, and at one point describes attempting a scarf for her husband. How did it finally turn out? When did she give it to him?
The author often mentions that she has a ministry for military women. That's it, just that she has a ministry and it takes a lot of time (which she feels guilty about), and she doesn't want to give it up. Nothing else.
The strangest part was that, despite being a Christian, she didn't seem to recognize the goodness of God in life.
"Ms. Nancy has also told me many times how she helped Cliff's dad find a job after they were forced to leave the Navy because of a medical discharge. She made the calls and did the legwork. She found him a job and their family a place to live. Am I being completely selfish thinking my husband should find his own job? Am I failing in a wife's duty?" (Was God on vacation during her MIL's situation? Does the author not think He will help her husband's difficulties?)
"Cliff started coughing. And complaining of a sore throat. And fever... Six hours later, as I'm packing up the kitchen, I see Cliff walk out of the bedroom with boxes in his hands, heading toward the office. And I breathe a silent prayer of thanks that I have indeed married a man's man. And that Tylenol works really, really well." (Where is the grace of God in this situation? Not needed, we have Tylenol to save the day!)
STRANGEST SENTENCE: "And that honey gets a lot better results than gasoline."
The book ends with the author crying because she still can't cook and burned a sandwich on the stove. The sewing machine is sitting in the corner unused because she's had no time between her job, book projects, and life, and she still can't knit. Her husband is deployed for a year, she has a full-time job she loves (and gloated about for pages on end when her husband did not get a job he desperately wanted and needed), and a nine-year-old child in school, and she gives up and goes to live with her in-laws because her life is too stressful. The end.
All of the insights I was hoping for are on page 178. Read that page and the gems she has to share are there. "Our first responsibility is to God. I don't think we can say, "We just need to balance." Because saying we need to balance implies making things equal, and God is not equal with anything... By placing him first the rest comes together."
"...What if I just wake up and say, "God, help me be the wife and mom you want me to be today," and leave it at that."
Just in case you need it, the author includes her recipe for Shrimp Pasta Florentine using a frozen entree.
2 stars, because it was entertaining enough for me to finish reading without skimming.
The author chats about her husband in uncomfortable ways:
"...I have trouble sometimes with resentment and thinking if he only did this or if he only did that, he would have a job by now... Cliff has a lot of wonderful qualities, but I would not consider self-discipline and assertiveness to be in that list. I often feel as if I'm working for both of us, trying to keep myself going as a freelance writing and then trying to encourage him to do...whatever."
"Apparently, the three of us were very dirty last week, because we used every single towel we own. And they were all lying in a pile outside the laundry room door. Normally, this would have been my signal to complain. If you start the laundry, you need to finish the laundry. And my husband does finish the laundry, it just takes him all week, and by the time it's finished, guess what? Yep, there's another pile of laundry to do."
"Sometimes my husband's observation skills drive me crazy. How is it he can ignore that the bathroom hasn't been cleaned in weeks or the stove top has spaghetti sauce splatters all over it, but he can notice a watermark stain on a dark-colored shirt halfway across the house?" (Weeks of dirty bathroom which she uses too...and it's hubby's job to clean it, after finishing the laundry, of course!)
The book doesn't read like a book, more like a blog or personal journal of WHATEVER seems to be on her mind and bothering her that day. The short sections come across as complaining and whining, mostly about meals and finances and her husband. She discusses different aspects of Proverbs 31 but the applications seem contrived, as if done solely for the writing and marketing of the book, and few insights are drawn from her attempts.
"We're so poor." "We are going on a cruise!" "We're so poor." "I purchased airline tickets for the entire family to fly with me to an interview!" "We're so poor." "I'm shopping for new home decorations!"
There were lots of unfinished thoughts. The family looks for a new church and attends one across town. Did they like it? Did they return?
She mentions knitting and sewing as a skill to learn, and at one point describes attempting a scarf for her husband. How did it finally turn out? When did she give it to him?
The author often mentions that she has a ministry for military women. That's it, just that she has a ministry and it takes a lot of time (which she feels guilty about), and she doesn't want to give it up. Nothing else.
The strangest part was that, despite being a Christian, she didn't seem to recognize the goodness of God in life.
"Ms. Nancy has also told me many times how she helped Cliff's dad find a job after they were forced to leave the Navy because of a medical discharge. She made the calls and did the legwork. She found him a job and their family a place to live. Am I being completely selfish thinking my husband should find his own job? Am I failing in a wife's duty?" (Was God on vacation during her MIL's situation? Does the author not think He will help her husband's difficulties?)
"Cliff started coughing. And complaining of a sore throat. And fever... Six hours later, as I'm packing up the kitchen, I see Cliff walk out of the bedroom with boxes in his hands, heading toward the office. And I breathe a silent prayer of thanks that I have indeed married a man's man. And that Tylenol works really, really well." (Where is the grace of God in this situation? Not needed, we have Tylenol to save the day!)
STRANGEST SENTENCE: "And that honey gets a lot better results than gasoline."
The book ends with the author crying because she still can't cook and burned a sandwich on the stove. The sewing machine is sitting in the corner unused because she's had no time between her job, book projects, and life, and she still can't knit. Her husband is deployed for a year, she has a full-time job she loves (and gloated about for pages on end when her husband did not get a job he desperately wanted and needed), and a nine-year-old child in school, and she gives up and goes to live with her in-laws because her life is too stressful. The end.
All of the insights I was hoping for are on page 178. Read that page and the gems she has to share are there. "Our first responsibility is to God. I don't think we can say, "We just need to balance." Because saying we need to balance implies making things equal, and God is not equal with anything... By placing him first the rest comes together."
"...What if I just wake up and say, "God, help me be the wife and mom you want me to be today," and leave it at that."
Just in case you need it, the author includes her recipe for Shrimp Pasta Florentine using a frozen entree.
2 stars, because it was entertaining enough for me to finish reading without skimming.
January 15, 2012
This was a quick and easy read, and I loved her honesty. I also appreciate that fact that she is a working Mom, and trying to work through this Proverbs 31thing through that lens, dealing with a lot of the same struggles that I do. A good read for Moms who need to be reminded that they aren't alone in being imperfect, and a good reminder and challenge of what matters most.
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