We have an obligation … wake up!
A friend just asked me to describe "The Dome" by Nova Sparks and this is what I came up with: "It's a horror story, because this dude that's cheating on his wife is having prescient nightmares about... someone offing The President of the United States? No wait, it's a disaster story, something is happening (comets, earthquakes, we're never quite sure ... oh and don't forget the bear attack!). No, it's a first contact story because the aliens save some of us. Oops, back to horror, those aliens do not come in peace! Or YA love story? Emma - our bright, drug-cooking, troubled but brilliant teenager - has refused her human boyfriend of 3 years who wanted to deflower her with his bad breath and clammy skin (well, not literally WITH those, but he was pretty gross) ... but the alien she met 3 days ago has captured her heart... and almost broken her hips because he's YUUUUUUGE!"
This whole place is nothing but a beautiful lie.
So that was the short version. In terms of the long version, look: I realize that science fiction by its very definition is pretty much allowed to run rampant when it comes to plot-lines and the scenarios that arise. But to underline this a few times, "the DOME" seemed like it could never settle on any given direction or intent or genre or etcetera. One minute we're looking at the mentioned catastrophic series of events (was this plural? I was never really sure?), with a mere 5,000 humans surviving thanks to their apparent rescue by… wait for it … aliens. However, in between all of this, we also have the marital infidelity issues as well as enough YA angst and theatrics to fill a separate series on its own. And kids, that's not even half of what eventually arises - though to be fair the alien-human sex is kind of hot! Both literally and figuratively… But for the overall pot of gumbo that is this book, I can confirm that it does NOT all work together.
In three days the President will be dead and then everyone else.
Ignoring the plethora of incompatible sub-genres for a moment, the book also is dragged down by an almost insufferable cast - see previous issues in regards to an unfaithful husband or a drug-brewing daughter that could have used a few months in Juvie to get her to calm TF down. Again, it just never seems to blend into one functioning story, a fact made even more obvious by the redundant nature of things as we progress. Sam - The Dad - is the kind of really swell guy that thinks things like "One more lie can’t hurt, especially if it’s for her own good." Then without fail Sam does A, feels bad about A, but then he does B, defends doing B, runs into C, has to do something about it… AND REPEAT. Same goes for our YA lead who I've mentioned before, namely Emma, aka the teenage daughter, where if she called her dad by his first name just one more time - or batted her eyelashes at the alien boy whose skin heated up around her - I would have screamed my head off. But thank goodness we do have a new species that she can already read like a book and with whom she can consider giving up her oddly still intact virginity that remains despite her other rather deviant shenanigans.
The Earth being destroyed is the best thing that ever happened to me.
And I don't know if being "saved" by aliens counts as a First Contact scenario or not, but the behavior of every single human present on this new world is so utterly mind-boggling to me that I still can't make sense of it. As are all the convenient similiarities between the "aliens" and us humans (they have penises and apparently somewhere to put them, too, yippee! Makes ya' feel like, quote, "a prized fucking pig" don't it?). But hey, getting back to the complaints being filed: oh wow, it's been a FULL WEEK since you landed on this alien world that's billions of light years away from your own destroyed planet? Oh wow, every single one of your needs has been seen to but you're upset by not being able to go shopping?
I take a deep breath, secretly hoping I’m not making chicken pot pie out of lemons.
[reviewer note: WTF?]
Well, by golly, who can blame you for not understanding everything and demanding answers from your hosts? Time to kick some butt and Make Syri Great Again! The hell with needing some time to deal with the fact that Earth is gone and billions of lives have been lost… what about my stock options, dammit? Personally, I kept hoping the Syrions would just take them all back to whatever was left of Earth, even if that wound up being just a few rocks colliding in roughly what might still be considered the Goldilocks zone of our previous solar system. If this is how the remnants of humankind behave in such a random situation (yeah, right, it's pretty obvious it's not) then I think the Federation or High Council or whoever is in charge in this Universe votes like the Prime Directive insists they do and just lets us die out.
Even in a crisis, people still seem to practice self-preservation over human decency.
Yeah, kind of a defeatist attitude, but I'm still grumpy after reading this poorly executed and boring book. What it needed was a good editor wielding a really big axe. The plot was silly and ultimately it did not resonate with me in any way whatsoever. The editing was also very poor with a host of spelling, formatting, grammatical and punctuation errors that simply should not have made their way through to release. But most of all, I didn't sympathize with any of the cookie cutter characters - human or otherwise - and the redundancy just drove me nuts. In the end, I was reading to just see if the ending would save everything… but that was just time wasted.
Why did you save us? Why didn’t you just leave us on Earth to die?
Oh well, I have had a good stretch for a while in terms of new authors and their offers, so I was bound to eventually have a crash and burn. But remember kids, if you start dreaming about the president being murdered for no apparent reason, grab all your friends and run to the nearest high altitude landmark, because The End is Nigh. I mean, DUH, right? Or whatever anyone else outside of the continental US did. Who knows, even the folks from Hawai'i had no comment. Just another one of the many gaping plot holes that weren't filled to any degree of satisfaction (noting I couldn't even continue the "trilogy" in that Book 2 - if it even exists - is not available for sale in ANY format in my region). OK, I need to stop, maybe I should take a good stroll outside of the Dome. I know, I know, be back by dark! And if I see a place to pick up tampons or pads, I'll get some…