If She Only Knew Me

by Jeff Gray

If She Only Knew Me is a creative way to help teachers and principals rethink their daily interactions with children. As tough as it is, we must keep in mind that each student has their own set of special circumstances. The challenge is knowing our students. The book reaffirms the belief that effective teachers and principals are careful not to jump to conclusions when it comes to analyzing student behavior and actions.

Genres: Picture Books, Cultural, Teaching, Nonfiction, School, Teachers, Emotion

28 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

Reviews

[Emily · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting story about a student's life in many of the schools I have worked at. The only thing I wish is that it was less about giving a kid a break, and more about giving a kid a hand up, connecting with their family, etc. to help them to succeed and do their homework. Great message though to those who have NO idea what our students go through everyday.

[Paul Hankins · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's a wish of mine that every teacher I knew/followed/am friends with would find this delightfully poignant book that follows Justin around his typical school day. The story is told with the repeating line, "If she only knew me. . ." Each entry is accompanied by a picture of this wonderful archetypal/unique child. My favorite is the one that reads:

If she knew that I
get really upset when
Leonard talks about my
momma, her biggest rule
would be, "No talking about
other people's mommas."

We see depictions wherein Justin is denied an extra cereal (one box per student--that's the rule), threatened with calls to his father (who has left his mother some time ago), put in the corner for not completing his homework (having stayed up late to care for his brother while his mother hung out at the park).

This is not a book about accountability OR making exceptions for every student. It's about our being accountable and making every student feel exceptional. This little picture book was made in 2005 which leads me to believe that little Justin from the book must be a senior now. I wonder where his life's path has taken him and where he is today.

The last page is a reminder to us all that our students DO know things.

[Leslie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great reminder for all teachers. I especially love the last page with the list of all the things he does know. it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking about all the things these kids don't know, but there are so many things they KNOW and we need to find ways to acknowledge that and connect with that, so we can teach them the OTHER THINGS they need to know.

[Vanesa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book really made me more aware that each child has different home-life/upbringing. We need to look take in to consideration the different circumstances and help children out more when we can

[Jonathan Santiago · Rating 5 out of 5]

it was a good book and it was interesting

[Erin Chambers · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think that this book makes a great point. It shows how just because you are from different lifestyles or neighborhoods or whatever the case may be doesn't mean that the you, or the other person, is better or not as good. It points out that we shouldn't judge or assume anything about anyone if we don't know their situation. We should get to know people for who they are and explore what they do know and what they can contribute. Just because someone may not know what we know, or believe what we believe, or view things in a different light than we do doesn't make them less. That person most likely knows things that you do not know, don't count them out because they aren't what you think they should be. Life lesson for all ages. Reading this to your class can open their eyes and minds to getting to know people and understand that people are different from one another but that doesn't mean you are better. It could teach them all of the things that I have already mentioned and a student may be able to relate to this and it could help them feel accepted and understood and not alone.

[Victoria Dimmitt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Touching story about a little boy who lives in a broken home and has to take on responsibilities that most little boys don't have to. This story is written to his teacher that doesn't take the time to understand why his homework isn't done or why he was late to school. Makes you realize that all children are different and grew up in different homes. Just because they don't have certain reading or math skills, doesn't mean that they don't have other skills; such as drawing and survivial skills.

[Cheryl Kays · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved the way this book made me think about the way we treat others and just assume we know why they are the way they are. As a future educator, it will be important for me to keep this book in mind so that I never assume anything about my students and I don't judge them without knowing what they're going through. I think this would also be a great book to read to a class if they are learning about bullying or accepting diversity. This will help them see that everyone is fighting their own battles and it's not fair to judge them until they've walked a mile in their shoes.

[Angela · Rating 5 out of 5]

This a really good book for any one who is thinking about being a teacher, is going to college to be a teacher, or even is a teacher. This book touched me, it was a very heart felt book. This book would be appropraite to read to any age of child frome 2nd grade up. If read to students this may open the door for them to let their teacher to get to know them better, and understand them. This book was about a young boy who was misunderstood by his teacher, because she never took the time to really know him or how his life was.

[Stella · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderful little book that would benefit all educators to read. Each precious child has a story - a story that is worth learning. We must look at the child as a whole. So often, it is too easy to be concerned with how a child's behavior affects our own needs as educators, in the midst of the demanding expectations and limited resources of the education system. This book reminds us to focus on learning and understanding the unique background and needs of each child.

"No significant learning occurs without a significant relationship." - Dr. James Comer

[Ali Strang · Rating 5 out of 5]

Age: 5 and up
Review: This book is great for both students and teachers. It gives teachers a different perspective of how to view their students. It shows the reader that everyone comes from a different background and that things are happening in their lives that we will never know about or understand. It really touched me as a soon to be teacher because it showed me that my students are all living completely different lives and have different set backs. I will definitely have this on my shelf and remember this whenever I am working with students.

[Hope · Rating 5 out of 5]

The "she" in the title, is the teacher. If the teacher knew the child, she would have a better understanding of why this child is who he is and perhaps, she would have compassion. Everyone has their own battle to face and it goes beyond the walls of the classroom, this is the same for teacher's as well. Brought tears to my eyes, but served as a reminder that we all have our own stories to tell and not all of them are like is portrayed on Disney.

[Priscilla Schelling · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book addresses the need for future teachers such as myself and present teachers to really know their students and think about the "why" before they judge the outcome. Many problems arise outside of school that really impact the lives of the students, and teachers need to understand this and be supportive. Sometimes, teachers are the only positive role models in a student's life, so they need to be there for their students.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This will be the book I refer to most to use as a motto for teaching. "If She Only Knew Me" is heartbreaking to me, but it inspires me to become a more open-minded person that my students can trust and rely on when they may not have that in their life. Teaching goes way beyond academics and this book nails that on the head. I have seen this in many classroom libraries, but I will keep an extra copy for my own personal admiration and inspiration.

[Emily Knight · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book in seminar before going to the poverty simulation. This is a sad book, but I really liked it. I would recommend it for all teachers to read. This was told from a little boys point of view. The line repeated over and over was "If She Only Knew Me". He would say this when he would get in trouble or do something wrong. This book teachers you that every child has a different life at home and you need to put that into consideration when teaching students.

[Jenna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful book! I am not a teacher yet, but I would recommend this to any of my peers in the program or thinking of entering the program. This is an honest example of judging others, which we are all guilty of. If She Only Knew Me made me take a second look at not only the students around me, but also adults we judge. We do not know what goes on behind closed doors, so we should respect and understand everyone equally at all times.

[Logan Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quick read. Appropriate for 4th or 5th grade. Very inspiring, explains that we need to look at children and people in general as more than what little we know about that individual. This book explains that what we don't know about people is far more than what we know in most occasions. Therefore, as teachers we need to keep an open mind when talking and working with children.

[Mary Ellen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think every reader wishes that they could have given this short book to at least one of their former teachers. It should be a must-read for all teachers, especially when they are feeling frustrated with a particular student. How easy it is to forget that even children come to us with baggage. As teachers, we should help to lighten the load and not add to it.

[Elizabeth Schrank · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very powerful. It is a must read for all teachers and future teachers. It helps to realize just how important it is to know the background of your students. This book puts into reality what many children go through outside of school and how it effects them in school.

[Taylor Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very powerful book about the importance of creating relationships with each of our students and getting to know all of them. Every new teacher should read this becuase it will help us learn to realize each student is different and comes from different backgrounds.

[Lydia Moses · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was shown to me during an education seminar. It helped us relate to the students we would be working with who lived in poverty and had to deal with hard things before they came to school. I was surprised to see this in the school when I was in the classroom.

[Amber · Rating 3 out of 5]

Every teacher should own a copy and when they forget how are kids really live these days should reread it. It's eye opening sad but very true. It can also be used to show children that some aren't as fortunete as they are and they should be greatful.

[Carlee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very powerful. It is a must read for all teachers and future teachers. It helps to realize just how important it is to know the background of your students. This book puts into reality what many children go through outside of school and how it effects them in school.

[Hannah Moss · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved the message behind this book. As teachers we do not what students go through outside of our classroom and we should take that into consideration. We may be their only support system and also the only place where they feel safe. A must read for all teachers!

[Mallory Brooks · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a future teacher an a student who went through similar ignorance a at school this book is amazing and I loved it so much. I recommend it to anyone who works with children. I got a little choked up even. Crazy the ignorance that lack or classroom management to do to a poor kid

[Brian · Rating 5 out of 5]

A good learning tool for any teacher. Shows us that we need to look at the big picture and ask questions before jumping to conclusions.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must read for every teacher. This books makes you take a step back and look at what is going on around you and your students.

[Kelly Triplett · Rating 5 out of 5]

An eye-opening book that should be read by every person who works with children, particularly teachers. It gives another perspective to an unfortunate reality.

[Hope Mullinax · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a must read for every teacher. As an educator, we can never be too careful trying not to pass judgment on our students.

[Candice Call · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good books for all teachers to read. Opens your eyes to what some of your students may be dealing with and how to see things in a different point of view.