Are You Waiting for "The One"?: Cultivating Realistic, Positive Expectations for Christian Marriage

by Margaret Kim Peterson, Dwight N. Peterson

Does God want to write your love story? Well, maybe not―especially not if it is the culture's romanticized ideal of happily ever after! Margaret and Dwight Peterson help us sort out the difference between how our surrounding society often depicts marriage and how Christians really should approach this particular gift of God to all humanity. They guide us through many aspects of a growing, maturing marriage including being a family, handling conflict, friendship, children, household economics and weathering the transitions of life. In the end they show how Christian marriage is far deeper and stronger than a romantic fairy tale. In fact, it reflects the kind of love God has for us in the gospel of Jesus Christ who gave his life for us that we might have his life in us.

Genres: Marriage, Christian, Christian Living, Relationships, Nonfiction, Christianity

232 pages, Paperback

First published May 4, 2011

Reviews

[Joel Wentz · Rating 5 out of 5]

This should be required reading at every Evangelical youth group, summer camp, and university. As a late-twentysomething who grew up in all these settings, I dearly wish someone had told me the advice contained in these pages a decade ago. The Petersons write with down-to-earth wisdom, and a deeply practical outlook, that is grown from experience and intimate knowledge of culture. This book stands out among the many trite, cliche "Christian romance self-help" pieces out there. The chapters on sex, hospitality, friendship, and growing old together absolutely impacted the way I think about these topics, heading into my own marriage in a few short months.

If you are swimming in Evangelical culture, like me, I really cannot recommend this one more highly. Single, dating, engaged, or married, you will be thankful you grabbed this!

[Bob · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is my new book to recommend to anyone thinking about romance or marriage. The authors are both biblical scholars who teach a marriage class at Eastern University. They puncture many of the Christian romance, wedding, and marriage fantasies that end up leading to the discouragement and disillusionment of many when real life doesn't work like this. They replace this with a realistic portrait of what a good marriage can look like. What I most appreciate is how much they talk about life after the wedding--sexuality, family, money and even "older love".

[Alice · Rating 4 out of 5]

My now favorite book on dating/marriage. The authors enthusiastically and with some tongue-in-cheek cover all the bases on marriage life. Chapters range from conflict to forming an economic partnership to friendship in marriage to old love. I'd recommend this to anyone thinking about what makes a good partner and considering the Christian marriage.

[Autumn Kern · Rating 5 out of 5]

A friend recommended this book to me, and I must admit- I wasn't thrilled about reading it. I am glad that I listened to her advice, as this is probably the best book I have ever read on marriage. I would recommend it to both singles and those who are already in relationships.

[Courtney Carlson · Rating 1 out of 5]

Several chapters were useful and well-considered, but because of the dreadful advice offered in a few chapters, I couldn’t give it more than one star.

[Hannah Andrews · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hey- people who grew up in the evangelical church and have no realisic framework to make smart decisions about marriage and relationships in adulthood. This book is for you! It covers a wide range of issues with really simple language and style that makes it easily accessible for all readers-- it's definitely worth the read!

[Yuxian Du · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very helpful Christian view of dating and marriage

I would strongly recommend this book to anyone who has been battling with the concept of "the one". This book demonstrate what a Christian view of dating and marriage, taking off the burden of finding "the one" completely.

[Andrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent book on marriage, and not simply for the unmarried who wish to be married or who are preparing for marriage, as the title seems to imply, but for the married as well. This is the second book I've read by Margaret Kim Peterson (this one is cowritten with her husband), and both have been so helpful and thought-provoking. I appreciate their very practical and specific advice, undergirded with a healthy view of what it means to live our lives as Christians. And just like Keeping House (my other favorite from this author), this book will be well worth re-reading.

[Angélique (Angel) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the most realistic yet thoroughly Christian book on relationships I have ever read. The Petersons tackle both the frequently discussed and the frequently ignored questions of the young adult heart with candidness and compassion, challenging many of the flawed assumptions we make about relationships. Their approach allowed me to not only recognize some of my erroneous beliefs but also to consider new ways of thinking about Christian relating.

[Christina Moss · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the best Christian marriage book I've read, by a mile. It's sensible, practical, and doesn't fall prey to the gender essentialism that characterizes every other marriage book I've read. It directly addresses domestic violence, which is refreshing. Overall, it's realistic, sensible, and hope-filled, although the section on contraception was a little too ambivalent for my taste.