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201 pages, Paperback
First published October 1, 2001
Samuel Johnson Is Indignant:
that Scotland has so few trees.

Certain Knowledge from Herodotus
These are the facts about the fish in the Nile:

Samuel Johnson Is Indignant:
that Scotland has so few trees.
There are many ways how to hunt crocodiles; I shall describe the way I think is most worth mentioning. The hunter baits a hook with a pig’s back, and lets it float in the river. He remains on the bank with a live piglet and beats it. The crocodile hears the squeals of the pig, follows the sound, and finds the bait, which it swallows; then the hunter hauls in the line. When the crocodile is ashore, he covers its eyes with mud; then the quarry is very easily overcome, but without that it would be very difficult.
Herodotus, Histories 2,70
We know only four boring people. The rest of our friends we find very interesting. However, most of the friends we find interesting find us boring: the most interesting find us the most boring. The few who are somewhere in the middle, with whom there is reciprocal interest, we distrust: at any moment, we feel, they may become too interesting for us, or we too interesting for them.
- Boring Friends, pg. 1
(see also: "My Husband and I", pg. 140 and "The Transformation", pg. 171)
Q.
A. Jury Duty.
Q.
A. The night before, we had been quarreling.
Q.
A. The family.
Q.
A. Four of us. Well, one doesn't live at home anymore. But he was home that night. He was leaving the next morning - the same morning I had to go in to the courtroom.
- Jury Duty, pg. 51
She knows she is right, but to say she is right is wrong, in this case. To be correct and say so is wrong, in certain cases.
She may be correct, and she may say so, in certain cases. But if she insists too much, she becomes wrong, so wrong that even her correctness becomes wrong, by association.
It is right to believe in what she thinks is right, but to say what she thinks is right is wrong, in certain cases.
She is right to act on her behalf, in her life. But she is wrong to report her right actions, in most cases. Then even her right actions become wrong, by association.
If she praises herself, she may be correct in what she says, but her saying it is wrong, in most cases, and thus cancels it, or reverses it, so that although she was for a particular act deserving of praise, she is no longer in general deserving of praise.
- Right and Wrong, pg. 129
These are the facts about the fish in the Nile:
- Certain Knowledge from Herodotus, pg. 14
We are sitting here together, my digestion and I. I am reading a book and it is working away at the lunch I ate a little while ago.
- Companion, pg. 21
Remember that thou are bu dust.
I shall try to bear it in mind.
- Examples of Remember, pg. 28
that Scotland has so few trees.
- Samuel Johnson Is Indignant, pg.44
At a certain point in her life, she realizes it is not so much that she wants to have a child as that she does not want not to have a child, or not to have had a child.
- A Double Negative, pg. 66
It invariably precedes, even if it do not altogether supercede, the determination of what is absolutely desirable and just.
- Honoring the Subjunctive, pg. 71
You ask me about Edith Wharton.
Well, the name is very familiar.
- Losing Memory, pg. 73
Each seal uses many blowholes and each blowhole is used by many seals.
- Information from the North Concerning the Ice, pg. 92
"It's extraordinary," says one woman.
"It is extraordinary," says the other.
- They Take Turns Using a Word They Like, pg. 98
We know we are very special. Yet we keep trying to find out in what way: not this way, not that way, then what way?
- Special, pg. 137
I am happy the leaves are growing large so quickly.
Soon they will hide the neighbor and her screaming child.
- Spring Spleen, pg. 141
It has been so long since she used a metaphor!
- Away from Home, pg. 167
They have moved into separate bedrooms now.
That night she dreams she is holding him in her arms. He dreams he is having dinner with Ben Johnson.
- Almost Over: Separate Bedrooms, pg. 199
I don't want any more gifts, cards, phone calls, prizes, clothes, friends, letters, books, souvenirs, pets, magazines, land, machines, houses, entertainments, honors, good news, dinners, jewels, vacations, flowers, or telegrams. I just want money.
- Money, pg. 200
I have only to add
that the plates in the present volume
have been carefully re-etched
by Mr. Cuff
- Acknowledgement, pg. 201