She Literally Exploded

by Christopher Howse, Richard Preston

What phrase enrages you most? "How are you spelling that?" perhaps, or, "issues around"? When the question came up in the Letters page of "The Daily Telegraph", hundreds of readers nominated the ones they loathed, and thousands more were posted on line. Provoked beyond endurance, Christopher Howse and Richard Preston compiled "The Infuriating Phrasebook", drawing on written and spoken insults to the intelligence from television, radio and the press. Infuriating and entertaining, this A-Z lexicon covers politicians' cliches, business jargon; shop assistants' rudenesses; public-service padding; menu madness and idiotic innovations. "The Infuriating Phrasebook" is sharply illustrated by the "Telegraph's" award-winning cartoonist Matt. All right - You all right there? A patronising enquiry made by nurses to old ladies already humiliated by being addressed by their Christian names. It is also used by shop assistants to customers who have been waiting a long time for service. Blue-sky thinking - Species of daydreaming for which businesses are usually billed by the hour. It can lead to thinking the unthinkable or saying the unsayable [qv]. Enjoy! - An order issued by waiters or baristas [qv] after they have delivered yours. First invented by - The second inventor is deservedly less well known. I'll let you go now - But you'll buttonhole me later. Inappropriate - Used by officials who want to blame people for behaviour that is not illegal or forbidden. The patient used an inappropriate tone when raising issues around ward cleanliness. Jus - gravy. Pan-fried - instead of being fried in an old dustbin-lid. Serving suggestion - On the label of a prepared meal, a warning that the plate, tablecloth, and accompanying boar's head shown in the picture are not included in the small plastic container. Spiral out of control - Residents feared that costs for the leisure complex would spiral out of control. When aeroplanes spiral out of control they go downwards. Spiralling costs seldom do the same. See also: Escalate. You're a star - Excessive and therefore patronising term of thanks for the performance of a routine duty. See also: legend, hero.

Hardcover

First published May 24, 2007

Reviews

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

the trouble with this "infuriating phrasebook" (2 words, surely?) by the Telegraph's excellent christopher howse is that it gets *me* literally exploding at the mangling of the language that's come over to the UK from my erstwhile home of the US. I thought most of these spoken insults to the intelligence were restricted to a square mile off the Bainbridge Ferry but no - they seem to be everywhere and ... well don't get me started, as they say.
it's a book that will have you boiling and a surefire hit as a present.
it's arranged as a dictionary and passes my first test by listing fulsome (used as if it meant 'very full'. in reality it means disgusting by excess of flattery. even my best pals seem not to know that.

i was going to quote to sound funny and flash but every entry begs citation and i'd only lose it if i started going thru the book looking for the bigger howlers.

[Sally Wilson · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book should be called "A Guide to Remaining Rigid and Colourless, Unlike Our Ever-Changing Language" or "How To Go Plebbie-Bashing, Without Affection or Respect." I gave it 2 stars because it has some really funny bits about how language is often used to deceive rather than illuminate.