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Andromeda Klein
Andromeda Klein has a few problems.
Her hair is kind of horrible.
Her partner-in-occultism, Daisy, is dead.
Her secret, estranged, much older and forbidden boyfriend-in-theory, has gone AWOL.
And her mother has learned how to text.
In short, things couldn't get much worse. Until they do. Daisy seems to be attempting to make contact from beyond, books are starting to disappear from the library, and then, strangely and suddenly, Andromeda's tarot readings are beginning to predict events with bizarrely literal accuracy.
Omens are everywhere. Dreams; swords; fires; hidden cards; lost, broken, and dead cell phones . . . and what is Daisy trying to tell her?
In the ensuing struggle of neutral versus evil, it's Andromeda Klein against the world, modern society, demonic forces, and the "friends" of the library.
From Frank Portman, author of King Dork , comes another unique literary experience. Andromeda Klein is dark, funny, smart, and entirely unforgettable.
From the Hardcover edition.
Her hair is kind of horrible.
Her partner-in-occultism, Daisy, is dead.
Her secret, estranged, much older and forbidden boyfriend-in-theory, has gone AWOL.
And her mother has learned how to text.
In short, things couldn't get much worse. Until they do. Daisy seems to be attempting to make contact from beyond, books are starting to disappear from the library, and then, strangely and suddenly, Andromeda's tarot readings are beginning to predict events with bizarrely literal accuracy.
Omens are everywhere. Dreams; swords; fires; hidden cards; lost, broken, and dead cell phones . . . and what is Daisy trying to tell her?
In the ensuing struggle of neutral versus evil, it's Andromeda Klein against the world, modern society, demonic forces, and the "friends" of the library.
From Frank Portman, author of King Dork , comes another unique literary experience. Andromeda Klein is dark, funny, smart, and entirely unforgettable.
From the Hardcover edition.
424 pages, Library Binding
First published January 1, 2009
27 people are currently reading
750 people want to read
About the author
Frank Portman
8 books168 followersI write books and songs. Books: King Dork, Andromeda Klein, and t King Dork Approximately.
***The paperback edition of King Dork Approximately is out now, and includes a free download of the accompanying King Dork Approximately the Album. Basically if you want the book it comes with a free album and if you want the album it comes with a free book.***
Behold, my web presence: frankportman.com
http://www.facebook.com/frankportman
http://doktorfrank.tumblr.com/
doktorfrank.com (blog)
Sounds Radical webstore: http://www.soundsradical.com/store/c1...
Sensitive soul, American dude, noize feeler.
***The paperback edition of King Dork Approximately is out now, and includes a free download of the accompanying King Dork Approximately the Album. Basically if you want the book it comes with a free album and if you want the album it comes with a free book.***
Behold, my web presence: frankportman.com
http://www.facebook.com/frankportman
http://doktorfrank.tumblr.com/
doktorfrank.com (blog)
Sounds Radical webstore: http://www.soundsradical.com/store/c1...
Sensitive soul, American dude, noize feeler.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 170 reviews
May 2, 2011
YA. Andromeda Klein lives so deeply in her head that in the first couple of pages of this you only get a few glimpses of her. She's riding her bike. She's wearing a hoodie. But mostly she's thinking about tarot and the Egyptian god Thoth. She relates to the world through tarot and her thoughts are complicated and infinitely layered, but I have to believe Portman purposely made them as dense and inaccessible as possible -- maybe to show us how different Andromeda is, how alienated from her peers -- because he later explains many of the same concepts in a way that's easy to grasp. In fact, the rest of this book is highly readable once you get over the steep wall of Andromeda's thoughts.
It's hard going, though. The opening throws a lot of new concepts at you. Andromeda has difficulty hearing because of osteogenesis imperfecta, a condition that affects the bones and cartilage, and she's developed her own language based on words and phrases she's (mis)heard. It's a lot to remember, but as chapter four promises:
Andromeda is sly, funny, odd, and always herself -- and she's in high school, so of course that makes life even more difficult -- and this book is about libraries and magic and finding people who accept you for who you are, and it's pretty damned satisfying.
Four and a half stars rounded up to five for good behavior. This starts off ploddingly, but I soon became immersed in Andromeda's world and tore through the second half of the book, rooting, hard, for her. Recommended. Difficult, but rewarding. Use the lexicon in the back.
It's hard going, though. The opening throws a lot of new concepts at you. Andromeda has difficulty hearing because of osteogenesis imperfecta, a condition that affects the bones and cartilage, and she's developed her own language based on words and phrases she's (mis)heard. It's a lot to remember, but as chapter four promises:
Most magical writing is deliberately obscure, designed to hide crucial matters from the uninitiated yet reveal them to those who know how to read the texts properly.That's this book exactly. If you stick with it and learn Andromeda's language, her world will open up to you.
Andromeda is sly, funny, odd, and always herself -- and she's in high school, so of course that makes life even more difficult -- and this book is about libraries and magic and finding people who accept you for who you are, and it's pretty damned satisfying.
Four and a half stars rounded up to five for good behavior. This starts off ploddingly, but I soon became immersed in Andromeda's world and tore through the second half of the book, rooting, hard, for her. Recommended. Difficult, but rewarding. Use the lexicon in the back.
December 19, 2011
In all honesty, I really can't recommend this book in good faith. However, for my part, I'm such an easy critic that it really grew on me. Even so, a book that takes until halfway through to really get moving and only really comes together at the last chapters has some problems in the workings.
Andromeda Klein tells the story of a misunderstood teenage girl who is obsessed with Tarot cards and the occult. Her life is falling apart at the seams. Her best friend died while she was on a family trip, her much-older boyfriend has lost interest in her and the library is weeding out all her favorite books. And now, she is receiving odd signs in her Tarot readings and from the world around her. What does it all mean, and what is the universe trying to tell her? You'll have to slog through the book to find out.
Andromeda Klein read more like a blog, based on the rate it told the story. It was very slow moving, and heavy on character inside jokes based on the main characters mis-hearings of words. However, the book is very well researched and packed with names, dates, references and lexicons to all things magic. I enjoyed the story by the end, but most readers will have closed this book long before the chapters reach the double digits.
Andromeda Klein tells the story of a misunderstood teenage girl who is obsessed with Tarot cards and the occult. Her life is falling apart at the seams. Her best friend died while she was on a family trip, her much-older boyfriend has lost interest in her and the library is weeding out all her favorite books. And now, she is receiving odd signs in her Tarot readings and from the world around her. What does it all mean, and what is the universe trying to tell her? You'll have to slog through the book to find out.
Andromeda Klein read more like a blog, based on the rate it told the story. It was very slow moving, and heavy on character inside jokes based on the main characters mis-hearings of words. However, the book is very well researched and packed with names, dates, references and lexicons to all things magic. I enjoyed the story by the end, but most readers will have closed this book long before the chapters reach the double digits.
March 20, 2013
[Edit: I originally gave this book 4 stars (I mention why in the original review below, which is unchanged), but given that I haven't been able to stop thinking about it or its fascinating main character since I read it, and keep recommending it to friends, it definitely warrants 5. This is a great read (though not for everyone, see review below) and if it doesn't deserve 5 stars, I don't know what does, it just leaves you a little pensive and wistful at the end (at least that's how it left me) so be forewarned.]
I enjoy a good YA novel a lot, sometimes more than books written for the adult market. The territory comes with a certain liberty to incorporate quirky and bizarre themes, and their meditations on coming of age and self-discovery remain identifiable at any age, because everyone either has or is still experiencing them.
Andromeda Klein is a really good YA novel. In fact it's just a really good novel which happens to be centered on a mental being whose temporal prison of (in her own eyes) rather disappointing flesh has yet to find release from that circle of existence which is called High School. And who also happens to practice occult magic (to varying degrees of success), only ever had one more-than-kinda-sorta friend (who is now dead), and is so divorced from contemporary culture she doesn't recognize the band when she hears it.
Despite her more than usual ouijanesse (possessing the qualities of eerie, metaphysical potency), you don't have to be an ectomorphic and extremely introverted occult adept with osteogenesis imperfecta, partial deafness and incorrigibly limp hair for Andromeda to be an identifiable character. Anyone who has ever felt bullied, betrayed, sub-normally attractive to the opposite sex, alienated from their peers, out of step with the world around them, suffered parental persecution or feared they loved someone more than that love was returned can empathize with her plight. Any one of these would be bad enough for a high school junior, and Andromeda has them all in spades. Yet despite her litany of problems, Portman's well-paced and witty writing keeps the specter of "wallowing" at bay, now poking gentle fun at his heroine's genetic under-performance and ironic misfortunes, now exposing an aching vulnerability and pathos that is as deeply moving as it is familiar, without ever allowing it to become contemptible or self-pitying.
I saw one review which complained that the action doesn't get underway until the middle of the book. That is undeniably true. But from the description above, it should be clear that this novel is at heart a character study. The entire plot culminates in the revelation of two acts which set in motion and explain all the other events leading up to their discovery, which only comes together in the last 50 or so pages. So like a mystery, the majority of the book is devoted to planting clues and convergent the significance of which is shadowy until key pieces of knowledge make sense of them. This structure closely parallels Andromeda's own worldview; that the Universe is rational and knowable (though not without the right tools and skills, and maybe not at all in this lifetime) and her obsessive self-tarot readings are her attempts to fill in the gaps in her knowledge to make sense of what's happening, though she learns that she can't ultimately find the answers in isolation.
This is an extremely contemplative book, but despite that and the fact that most of it could be considered one long set-up to the big reveal, it's the complete opposite of slow. It's very funny (I laughed aloud at ), the pacing is superb, chapters are just the right length and the elements of mystery and (literally) existential anxiety kept me up through the night to read one after another. But it's not for everyone. You definitely have to think Andromeda's is a psychology worth discovering, because if you find her the least bit tiresome, there is not enough of a plot outside of her to offer any relief.
Some people might find the integration into the entire book of the Andromeda-specific vocabulary brought on by her hearing defects tedious and a little forced, but I thought it was true to the way we all develop our own idiolectic quirks, which in her case, like everything else, reaches new extremes. I didn't need a lot of the explanations of certain (sub)cultural and literary references or the meaning of basic Latin, but they're entirely appropriate to the target audience and slipped in subtly enough to not grind the narrative to a halt. I haven't read the work of authors like Crowley or A.E. Waite, so I can't speak to how accurate or well-researched they are, but they seemed credible .
Until I finished the last 60 pages of this book, I would have given it 5 stars. I still think it's a great, expertly-crafted book, but something about the resolution left me just let down enough that I couldn't. It shouldn't be taken as too much of a mark against this book though; I have serial difficulty with endings. They're ever harder to write than to read and I think most authors must struggle with them. I guess I also had some implicit expectations that weren't quite met. Still, this shouldn't take away from the fact that the ending deftly brings around everything that came before it, their ultimate meanings revealed. This book is very polished, and very lean. Everything is there for a reason. Reading it, you start to believe, along with Andromeda, that there really are no coincidences.
I enjoy a good YA novel a lot, sometimes more than books written for the adult market. The territory comes with a certain liberty to incorporate quirky and bizarre themes, and their meditations on coming of age and self-discovery remain identifiable at any age, because everyone either has or is still experiencing them.
Andromeda Klein is a really good YA novel. In fact it's just a really good novel which happens to be centered on a mental being whose temporal prison of (in her own eyes) rather disappointing flesh has yet to find release from that circle of existence which is called High School. And who also happens to practice occult magic (to varying degrees of success), only ever had one more-than-kinda-sorta friend (who is now dead), and is so divorced from contemporary culture she doesn't recognize the band when she hears it.
Despite her more than usual ouijanesse (possessing the qualities of eerie, metaphysical potency), you don't have to be an ectomorphic and extremely introverted occult adept with osteogenesis imperfecta, partial deafness and incorrigibly limp hair for Andromeda to be an identifiable character. Anyone who has ever felt bullied, betrayed, sub-normally attractive to the opposite sex, alienated from their peers, out of step with the world around them, suffered parental persecution or feared they loved someone more than that love was returned can empathize with her plight. Any one of these would be bad enough for a high school junior, and Andromeda has them all in spades. Yet despite her litany of problems, Portman's well-paced and witty writing keeps the specter of "wallowing" at bay, now poking gentle fun at his heroine's genetic under-performance and ironic misfortunes, now exposing an aching vulnerability and pathos that is as deeply moving as it is familiar, without ever allowing it to become contemptible or self-pitying.
I saw one review which complained that the action doesn't get underway until the middle of the book. That is undeniably true. But from the description above, it should be clear that this novel is at heart a character study. The entire plot culminates in the revelation of two acts which set in motion and explain all the other events leading up to their discovery, which only comes together in the last 50 or so pages. So like a mystery, the majority of the book is devoted to planting clues and convergent the significance of which is shadowy until key pieces of knowledge make sense of them. This structure closely parallels Andromeda's own worldview; that the Universe is rational and knowable (though not without the right tools and skills, and maybe not at all in this lifetime) and her obsessive self-tarot readings are her attempts to fill in the gaps in her knowledge to make sense of what's happening, though she learns that she can't ultimately find the answers in isolation.
This is an extremely contemplative book, but despite that and the fact that most of it could be considered one long set-up to the big reveal, it's the complete opposite of slow. It's very funny (I laughed aloud at ), the pacing is superb, chapters are just the right length and the elements of mystery and (literally) existential anxiety kept me up through the night to read one after another. But it's not for everyone. You definitely have to think Andromeda's is a psychology worth discovering, because if you find her the least bit tiresome, there is not enough of a plot outside of her to offer any relief.
Some people might find the integration into the entire book of the Andromeda-specific vocabulary brought on by her hearing defects tedious and a little forced, but I thought it was true to the way we all develop our own idiolectic quirks, which in her case, like everything else, reaches new extremes. I didn't need a lot of the explanations of certain (sub)cultural and literary references or the meaning of basic Latin, but they're entirely appropriate to the target audience and slipped in subtly enough to not grind the narrative to a halt. I haven't read the work of authors like Crowley or A.E. Waite, so I can't speak to how accurate or well-researched they are, but they seemed credible .
Until I finished the last 60 pages of this book, I would have given it 5 stars. I still think it's a great, expertly-crafted book, but something about the resolution left me just let down enough that I couldn't. It shouldn't be taken as too much of a mark against this book though; I have serial difficulty with endings. They're ever harder to write than to read and I think most authors must struggle with them. I guess I also had some implicit expectations that weren't quite met. Still, this shouldn't take away from the fact that the ending deftly brings around everything that came before it, their ultimate meanings revealed. This book is very polished, and very lean. Everything is there for a reason. Reading it, you start to believe, along with Andromeda, that there really are no coincidences.
May 3, 2011
I didn't really like King Dork when I read it, so I'm not sure now what exactly got me interested in reading Andromeda Klein. Probably it was the concept of a modern teenager doing ceremonial magic in a very Crowley sort of way. And maybe if you liked King Dork, and you're deeply interested in ceremonial magic, it'll be a great read for you. But I didn't like King Dork, and I have only a passing interest in ceremonial magic, so this was doomed from the start.
The ceremonial magic is very, very well-researched. Which may well be part of the problem. The book reads very much like it's being transcribed from a book of research notes. But this is supposed to be Andromeda's inner thoughts, and people don't really think like that. Not even Hermione Granger. Not unless they're actually consulting their notes. But we start the book following Andromeda on a bike ride, where her thoughts resemble a lecture in ceremonial magic, and it just doesn't ring true. Now, as soon as we get out of Andromeda's head, the world starts to come alive. For the most part, the teenagers are acting like real, live teenagers, and talking like real, live teenagers.
But the plot? It has no end. Things are set up, but nothing comes of them, or we're cut off before the resolution. This is obviously intentional, but it's just as obvious that there won't be a sequel. We're just going to be left hanging on... Well, pretty much everything that could be called a plot thread in this book. I don't know why Portman wrote it that way, but this is your advance warning: nothing that you want resolved will be resolved in any way. And considering the situation that he sets up in the last few pages, I'm pretty displeased. Trying to avoid spoilers, as much as possible, the book ends with Andromeda in a very serious situation, with no hint whatsoever of how it will be resolved. Not pleased.
The ceremonial magic is very, very well-researched. Which may well be part of the problem. The book reads very much like it's being transcribed from a book of research notes. But this is supposed to be Andromeda's inner thoughts, and people don't really think like that. Not even Hermione Granger. Not unless they're actually consulting their notes. But we start the book following Andromeda on a bike ride, where her thoughts resemble a lecture in ceremonial magic, and it just doesn't ring true. Now, as soon as we get out of Andromeda's head, the world starts to come alive. For the most part, the teenagers are acting like real, live teenagers, and talking like real, live teenagers.
But the plot? It has no end. Things are set up, but nothing comes of them, or we're cut off before the resolution. This is obviously intentional, but it's just as obvious that there won't be a sequel. We're just going to be left hanging on... Well, pretty much everything that could be called a plot thread in this book. I don't know why Portman wrote it that way, but this is your advance warning: nothing that you want resolved will be resolved in any way. And considering the situation that he sets up in the last few pages, I'm pretty displeased. Trying to avoid spoilers, as much as possible, the book ends with Andromeda in a very serious situation, with no hint whatsoever of how it will be resolved. Not pleased.
September 3, 2009
Would you judge me if I told you I don't like long books? You'd probably be right to judge me, but I don't. I mean, it's not a hardline absolute thing; I'm just always, like, three hundred pages? That will take a LONG GODDAM TIME to get through. And I DO NOT HAVE VERY MUCH TIME. And I WANT TO HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT EVERY BOOK. How will I have an opinion about every book if it takes me a week to read every book?
My favorite writers are Dennis Cooper and Kathy Acker; I namecheck them in every other review. It's not a coincidence they both wrote a bunch of 190 page novels, y'know?
Anyway, it's a good thing I was two hundred pages into this thing before I I figured out that it was over 400 pages. Then I was actually stoked to have lots of book left! Because Andromeda Klein is a believable enough character, and her occultism rings true in an extremely satisfying way.
I'm having trouble thinking of ways to tell you about how much I liked this book. It's not like it's the most realistic novel, or the most emotionally brutal novel, or anything; it just creates this really consistent, weedgie (ha!) world of its own that's really nice to wallow around in for 400 pages. Plus I love it when a novel goes off the rails a little bit towards the end.
Is this why everybody loves YA fiction so much? 'Cause it's really good?
My favorite writers are Dennis Cooper and Kathy Acker; I namecheck them in every other review. It's not a coincidence they both wrote a bunch of 190 page novels, y'know?
Anyway, it's a good thing I was two hundred pages into this thing before I I figured out that it was over 400 pages. Then I was actually stoked to have lots of book left! Because Andromeda Klein is a believable enough character, and her occultism rings true in an extremely satisfying way.
I'm having trouble thinking of ways to tell you about how much I liked this book. It's not like it's the most realistic novel, or the most emotionally brutal novel, or anything; it just creates this really consistent, weedgie (ha!) world of its own that's really nice to wallow around in for 400 pages. Plus I love it when a novel goes off the rails a little bit towards the end.
Is this why everybody loves YA fiction so much? 'Cause it's really good?
June 18, 2010
I liked "King Dork", so this had been in the queue for a while. This is another coming-of-age story about an awkward teen at the very bottom of the social totem pole. In this case, it's Andromeda Klein, a teenage girl obsessed with magic, tarot, and the occult. Her best friend recently passed away, her older-guy crush won't text her, her parents are nutty, her hair is awful, her friends are more like "frenemies"...This may sound like your standard young adult fare, but throw in lots of randomly-obscure and esoteric references to ancient mythology and magic, a talking guardian angel, an entire lexicon of words misheard by Andromeda due to a rare medical condition, and you've got yourself one weird book. Portman can't resist throwing in punk/rock/indie references and characters here and there, but they certainly aren't the focus like they were in "King Dork".
It takes a while to get into this, (if this might be the type of thing that you could get into in the first place), and if I hadn't already loaded the first 6 discs into my car's CD player for my commute, I might not have stuck it out. However, I eventually enjoyed my small dose of craziness each morning on my way to work. Ultimately, this is one of those books that I just can't properly critique. There were a lot of things left hanging throughout the story and an ending that just didn't really do it for me. Bottom line, you probably won't like it. I don't think I did...
It takes a while to get into this, (if this might be the type of thing that you could get into in the first place), and if I hadn't already loaded the first 6 discs into my car's CD player for my commute, I might not have stuck it out. However, I eventually enjoyed my small dose of craziness each morning on my way to work. Ultimately, this is one of those books that I just can't properly critique. There were a lot of things left hanging throughout the story and an ending that just didn't really do it for me. Bottom line, you probably won't like it. I don't think I did...
August 3, 2010
Terrible... so, so terrible. I didn't actually finish this book (which is pretty rare for me), but there was no listing for "I tried, but it was just WAY too bad." I was SO disappointed in this book, I can't even begin to describe it, so I won't. Instead, I'll make a pitch for Frank Portman's 1st book, "King Dork," which quite possibly ranks as my favorite teen-lit book. Yes... it even beats "Catcher in the Rye." ;) So... if you picked this one up by mistake, don't write off Frank Portman. Go get "King Dork," and you won't be disappointed. Let's just hope he gets back on track for book #3, or sticks to music (see Mr. T Experience), or something.
December 14, 2009
Slow read - often muddied. Wade away from the banks of the first 50 pages and the waters start to clear -- but there is no current that takes you away. Dealing with the occult - one gets the impression the author busied himself so much with reading up on the complexities of the subject that he never got the chance to unstring the tangled points of light into a cohesive plot.
April 23, 2010
I could not finish this book. It read like a text book on "how to....with the occult". I felt like it was a platform for teaching people about tarot cards, witchcraft, new age...etc. It seemed to be less about a story and more about teaching.
November 25, 2009
I started listening to this on audio CD, but when my ears began to bleed I quickly retrieved it from the CD player and calmed myself with some NPR...really, really crappy.
July 15, 2020
This book was weird and relatable.... but in a casually dark, twisted, chemically imbalanced teenage kind of way. Definitely niche for all you kiddos who maybe had a scene / emo / witchy phase.
What I liked best about this particular novel was the style of writing, which sets it apart from other YA, in my opinion. Throughout the book, Portman’s tone remains relaxed. Even when he is discussing some pretty gnarly subjects: divorce, death, and depression. Many YA books tackle these issues with overtly dramatic prose, which usually yields a lack of full reality or sincerity. But I think Portman’s choice to discuss these topics matter-of-factly and with a casual air, creates space for the problems to speak for themselves. Furthermore, his choice to offer brief glimpses of vulnerability from his characters, made those moments so much stronger.
BUT DAMN this book is long & it’s a mental exercise from start to finish. Constantly you are adding new words to your lexicon in order to navigate this book, whilst trying to remember ever single “synch” that Andromeda encounters in her magickal world.
Overall, it was a weird read. But I think I came out on the other side understanding a bit more about the magick in my own world.
What I liked best about this particular novel was the style of writing, which sets it apart from other YA, in my opinion. Throughout the book, Portman’s tone remains relaxed. Even when he is discussing some pretty gnarly subjects: divorce, death, and depression. Many YA books tackle these issues with overtly dramatic prose, which usually yields a lack of full reality or sincerity. But I think Portman’s choice to discuss these topics matter-of-factly and with a casual air, creates space for the problems to speak for themselves. Furthermore, his choice to offer brief glimpses of vulnerability from his characters, made those moments so much stronger.
BUT DAMN this book is long & it’s a mental exercise from start to finish. Constantly you are adding new words to your lexicon in order to navigate this book, whilst trying to remember ever single “synch” that Andromeda encounters in her magickal world.
Overall, it was a weird read. But I think I came out on the other side understanding a bit more about the magick in my own world.
September 30, 2019
I’m happy I kept reading and finished this book, but I would have been ok if I had never picked it up. It was a little underwhelming for my taste. There was so much build-up and a lot about magic, but a bit boring overall.
May 29, 2010
This book is really quite something. First of all a YA book that isn't typeset like a freshmen trying to make their paper longer. Second a YA book that doesn't dumb down the writing. While these are not unknown (octavian nothing springs to mind), I find them rare. In fact, this book elevates typical teen speak to good writing. About a young teen occultist, whose library is oddly stocked with esoterica (the dewey number 133 makes quite a few appearances). The pictures of early 20th century occult writers and writings is so well done I am not sure whether his characterizations are true or false, or whether several of the are real or not, or if the books exist. If they do a bibliography would have been nice at the end. He does an excellent job of getting into the mind of a shy teenage girl and her less savory friends. A lot of the writing style centers around the main character's hearing problem, her tendency to replace phrases with random ones that are similar, these phrases enter the "lexicon" and are used throughout the book. It takes a bit of getting used to, and I was like hey there should be a glossary, so of course when I turned the last page of the book, there it was.
Yes like everyone it was a little hard to get into, I don't know anything about tarot. He throws you into Andromeda's mind with her vast knowledge of the occult and her own lexicon. It takes a bit to sort things out, but once you do it's worth it. It was not what I was expecting. I would have loved a little bit about tarot etc to explain some of it to me. The book reads a bit like a mystery novel.
A couple issues with the characterization of libraries! A lot of the plot revolves around Andromeda's job as a page at the Library, and that the magic books are being weeded and sold on e-bay by the friend's of the libary. First off, yes it is explained why the library has super old books... but i still find it so unlikely as to strain credulity. Second stop making weeding seem like a bad thing, it is very important! Also no one just weeds everything not checked out without a second look. Also there is no such thing as staff checking, clearly a plot device so books Andromeda has checked out will remain without a checkout. Also updating the computers etc so that people actually come to a library is a good thing, though an awesome collection of occult books should be turned into a special collection, that would make the library better. Also probably they should be made non-circulating.
Yes like everyone it was a little hard to get into, I don't know anything about tarot. He throws you into Andromeda's mind with her vast knowledge of the occult and her own lexicon. It takes a bit to sort things out, but once you do it's worth it. It was not what I was expecting. I would have loved a little bit about tarot etc to explain some of it to me. The book reads a bit like a mystery novel.
A couple issues with the characterization of libraries! A lot of the plot revolves around Andromeda's job as a page at the Library, and that the magic books are being weeded and sold on e-bay by the friend's of the libary. First off, yes it is explained why the library has super old books... but i still find it so unlikely as to strain credulity. Second stop making weeding seem like a bad thing, it is very important! Also no one just weeds everything not checked out without a second look. Also there is no such thing as staff checking, clearly a plot device so books Andromeda has checked out will remain without a checkout. Also updating the computers etc so that people actually come to a library is a good thing, though an awesome collection of occult books should be turned into a special collection, that would make the library better. Also probably they should be made non-circulating.
October 18, 2009
I attended a panel at the Book Expo in NYC earlier this year and the editor for the publisher did a great job of hyping this book to librarians.
Pretty much he pitched it as Andromeda Klein, a lowly library page, and part-time occultist versus an evil "Friends of the Library" organization with sinister intensions.
Librarians can have a lot of animosity towards Friends groups that are supposed to help libraries, but somehow very often wind up being an additional source of stress.
The occult plays a very minor role in the story and the Friends are only evil in Andromeda’s eyes. Andromeda is just your typical offbeat teenage girl into Tarot Cards and she has a hearing problem and apparently a bone disease but other than that nothing special.
What also bothers me is a casual attitude to drinking and drug use in this novel, which we know are part of many teens’ lives, but there is no message here that they can be a very bad part of a teen’s life, something that I think would be essential in young adult literature, but too often isn’t.
Pretty much he pitched it as Andromeda Klein, a lowly library page, and part-time occultist versus an evil "Friends of the Library" organization with sinister intensions.
Librarians can have a lot of animosity towards Friends groups that are supposed to help libraries, but somehow very often wind up being an additional source of stress.
The occult plays a very minor role in the story and the Friends are only evil in Andromeda’s eyes. Andromeda is just your typical offbeat teenage girl into Tarot Cards and she has a hearing problem and apparently a bone disease but other than that nothing special.
What also bothers me is a casual attitude to drinking and drug use in this novel, which we know are part of many teens’ lives, but there is no message here that they can be a very bad part of a teen’s life, something that I think would be essential in young adult literature, but too often isn’t.
September 22, 2009
Most of my way through this book I felt overloaded, with the density of the text's narrative information, the detailed occult references, the intensity of being trapped in Andromeda Klein's mind. I like to read fast, and this YA book took me 20 days to push through. Was it worth it? I'm not sure. It was interesting and different, but sometimes felt like a slog. When it focused less on the intricacies of AK's solitary magical thinking, and more on the awkward disconnects of her social interactions with, well, almost everyone, the book was quite good. Dunno really how to score this one. The fact I finished it is an achievement of sorts for me, considering how quickly I like to move on. 2 stars may be more honest to how I feel, but I'm giving it 3 because I want other people to give it a shot. Read it and see what you think. Because this is the kind of book that is going to be someone's unabashed favorite.
October 19, 2009
Frank Portman wrote another YA book, and it's almost as good as "King Dork." I really feel like he has an uncanny knack for the teen voice, and from page one the reader is sucked into Andromeda's world, including her terms for the various things that make up her day to day life, like the International House of Bookcakes and Afternoon Tea. At times, this, as well as the incredibly detailed descriptions of Tarot cards and magical rituals, threaten to overwhelm the narrative, but they do help the reader fully enter her world. I can relate to many aspects of Andromeda, from the trouble hearing people to her mousy shyness to her desire to save books being weeded from her local library, but mostly in the desire to be liked and accepted, and yet still stand apart from the high school norm, that Portman's heroes seem to share. I love how his main characters can be total outcasts in high school and still look down on people for mis-pronouncing things like "Alestier Crowley."
July 15, 2010
GUPTG at page 79, which begins, "Most magical writing is deliberately obscure, designed to hide crucial matters from the uninitiated yet reveal them to those who know how to read the texts properly."
Well, count me out, Jack. And count you out, too, unless "Horus", "Crowley", and "Isis" are household names in yours. I knew that King Dork (which I absolutely loved) would be a tough act to follow, but this just limps behind. I was intrigued by the occult premise, but the references are relentless, and unless you’re an expert, you're apt to be completely lost (at least I was). And somehow the characters fell flat, maybe because this was written in the third person when the author clearly excels in the first. Or maybe they just weren't that interesting. While the riotous belly laughs of KD were in absentia here, there were some worthy glimmers of humor, but not enough for me to persevere.
Too bad!
Well, count me out, Jack. And count you out, too, unless "Horus", "Crowley", and "Isis" are household names in yours. I knew that King Dork (which I absolutely loved) would be a tough act to follow, but this just limps behind. I was intrigued by the occult premise, but the references are relentless, and unless you’re an expert, you're apt to be completely lost (at least I was). And somehow the characters fell flat, maybe because this was written in the third person when the author clearly excels in the first. Or maybe they just weren't that interesting. While the riotous belly laughs of KD were in absentia here, there were some worthy glimmers of humor, but not enough for me to persevere.
Too bad!
December 6, 2009
Andromeda often talks about her favorite author, who, to protect the contents of his book from outsiders, tries to confuse the reader with his writing. I believe that this is a subtle reference to Frank P's intentions when he wrote this book. This isn't a YA book for someone looking for a romance or a thrill- this is a story for young adults who want a challenging book that is geared toward their age group. "Andromeda Klein" uses occultism to confuse the reader at first, but once I began to understand it, I realized that the focus of the book was more about understanding the characters than about trying to come up with an interesting plot- though "A.K"'s plot was great. This is a book that I'm going to have to read again and again to really understand, but I'm looking forward to it.
August 25, 2023
Deaf reader reviewing books with deaf characters. This book is listed on my ranked list of books with deaf characters.
Andromeda is a high school junior who loves the occult. She has osteogenesis imperfecta that caused bone malformations (which she refers to as her "defective ears"), hence a “mild” conductive deafness. This was published before 3D printing of the ossicles, so she references an expensive procedure that replaces cartilage with steel implants (stapendectomy) which she would consider. So Portman is showing off his knowledge here.
Andromeda constantly mishears things. Some are very realistic (“wicker” instead of “wicca,” and “reading” instead of “weeding,” but others are less so—confusing “freak,” “geek,” and “weak,” as well as “reading” and “bleeding,” are much stranger because they are more easily discernible through speechreading, which I assume Andromeda does due to the repeated mentions of her lack of eye contact with others).
One annoyance: when someone mispronounces something, it supposedly “cuts out the middleman” so she hears it as it is spoken, rather than warped as correctly pronounced words are. So when someone says “mageek” to her, that is what she hears, whereas if they had said “magic” she would have heard something else. That’s not how mishearing things works. If someone mispronounces something, it’s even harder for a deaf person to parse out what they meant.
Andromeda has a habit of saying “What?” even as she processes what’s been said and responds before any repetition. People who know her don’t repeat right away anymore.
Portman does well with keeping her deafness straight. That is, she has trouble with higher frequencies, and Portman keeps that consistent. Andromeda’s ears tend to filter out speech sounds but pick up background noise well (lower frequencies). She doesn’t hear distant sirens responding to a fire, reinforcing she has more trouble with higher frequencies.
She also frequently experiences tinnitus, which is very accurate to the deaf experience in general. With her conductive deafness, she would more likely have pulsatile tinnitus.
Something I find very interesting: When Andromeda mishears something, she will inform the reader that the speaker “meant” (not “actually said”) the actual words they used. (E.g., “Are you hiding camels in there?” She meant “lighting candles.”) But she often goes on to use the misheard phrase in the narrated text, playfully adopting it into her own vocabulary. For example, when she misheard “wicca” as “wicker,” she continued to muse about the former while using the latter, occasionally crossing over the two (a worship of furniture).
Again, though, some of these mishearings are contrived: “warnings about unintended camels burning down sickle family gnomes and how interns won’t cover chairlessness and negligees faded out.” (warnings about unattended candles burning down several(?) family homes and how insurance won’t cover carelessness and negligence faded out). Mom probably didn’t pronounce negligence with an “ay” sound as in negligees, and if Andromeda can’t hear higher frequencies she wouldn’t have assumed something like “chair” instead of “care,” given the context of the warnings come right after she’s accused of having lit candles in her room. So Portman is definitely exaggerating a lot of what Andromeda mishears for comedic effect.
I’m not too upset by the occasional taking it too far (whole strings of nonsense out of context as opposed to a few words here and there that she has to guess/figure out), as it’s generally well incorporated. But it does get annoying as a deaf reader because now I have to work extra hard to figure out what she's "mishearing."
I think the weakest aspect of Portman's portrayal of deafness has to do with music.
Andromeda struggles to use earbuds due to her ear shape, and the volume doesn’t go loud enough for her to make out more than chaos and a few lyrics here and there. Mostly just “a growling man with a loud clatter in the background.” This is realistic. But later she is able to understand the lyrics of one song, which are spoken in a reverberant, computerized voice, and recognize it as an almost verbatim list of instructions from an old ritual. This is less realistic.
She listens to a lot of music, and seems to be able to make out everything just fine, even hearing slithering noises (which would presumably be out of her hearing range?). Not sure if this is inconsistency or if old cassette players have a higher volume than CD players. (In the film Sixth Sense, Malcolm turns up the volume enough to hear a ghost’s voice, but I don’t know if that’s a supernatural thing or if cassette players actually go up that high.) Later Byron tells her it’s Led Zeppelin singing, not a woman, so maybe she’s just got the Lady Montegreen effect. Like when we were kids my brother thought Godsmack was singing “I, ravioli” instead of “I stand alone.” (He really loved ravioli.)
I wish it was clearer to the reader what exactly was going on with her music-listening.
At the end, it turns out a big reason for her deafness is buildup, as her ears are oddly shaped and difficult to clean. The doctor cleans her ears and she can hear much more than before—seemingly everything—and is hyperaware of sound for a bit. I don’t really like that this comes at the very end, as it comes across as magic cure. It’s just that we have a “happy ending” and the curing of her hearing plays a part of that happiness/hopefulness. As though if she hadn’t gotten her ears cleaned she would have been less happy somehow. I don't know.
Andromeda is a high school junior who loves the occult. She has osteogenesis imperfecta that caused bone malformations (which she refers to as her "defective ears"), hence a “mild” conductive deafness. This was published before 3D printing of the ossicles, so she references an expensive procedure that replaces cartilage with steel implants (stapendectomy) which she would consider. So Portman is showing off his knowledge here.
Andromeda constantly mishears things. Some are very realistic (“wicker” instead of “wicca,” and “reading” instead of “weeding,” but others are less so—confusing “freak,” “geek,” and “weak,” as well as “reading” and “bleeding,” are much stranger because they are more easily discernible through speechreading, which I assume Andromeda does due to the repeated mentions of her lack of eye contact with others).
One annoyance: when someone mispronounces something, it supposedly “cuts out the middleman” so she hears it as it is spoken, rather than warped as correctly pronounced words are. So when someone says “mageek” to her, that is what she hears, whereas if they had said “magic” she would have heard something else. That’s not how mishearing things works. If someone mispronounces something, it’s even harder for a deaf person to parse out what they meant.
Andromeda has a habit of saying “What?” even as she processes what’s been said and responds before any repetition. People who know her don’t repeat right away anymore.
Portman does well with keeping her deafness straight. That is, she has trouble with higher frequencies, and Portman keeps that consistent. Andromeda’s ears tend to filter out speech sounds but pick up background noise well (lower frequencies). She doesn’t hear distant sirens responding to a fire, reinforcing she has more trouble with higher frequencies.
She also frequently experiences tinnitus, which is very accurate to the deaf experience in general. With her conductive deafness, she would more likely have pulsatile tinnitus.
Something I find very interesting: When Andromeda mishears something, she will inform the reader that the speaker “meant” (not “actually said”) the actual words they used. (E.g., “Are you hiding camels in there?” She meant “lighting candles.”) But she often goes on to use the misheard phrase in the narrated text, playfully adopting it into her own vocabulary. For example, when she misheard “wicca” as “wicker,” she continued to muse about the former while using the latter, occasionally crossing over the two (a worship of furniture).
Again, though, some of these mishearings are contrived: “warnings about unintended camels burning down sickle family gnomes and how interns won’t cover chairlessness and negligees faded out.” (warnings about unattended candles burning down several(?) family homes and how insurance won’t cover carelessness and negligence faded out). Mom probably didn’t pronounce negligence with an “ay” sound as in negligees, and if Andromeda can’t hear higher frequencies she wouldn’t have assumed something like “chair” instead of “care,” given the context of the warnings come right after she’s accused of having lit candles in her room. So Portman is definitely exaggerating a lot of what Andromeda mishears for comedic effect.
I’m not too upset by the occasional taking it too far (whole strings of nonsense out of context as opposed to a few words here and there that she has to guess/figure out), as it’s generally well incorporated. But it does get annoying as a deaf reader because now I have to work extra hard to figure out what she's "mishearing."
I think the weakest aspect of Portman's portrayal of deafness has to do with music.
Andromeda struggles to use earbuds due to her ear shape, and the volume doesn’t go loud enough for her to make out more than chaos and a few lyrics here and there. Mostly just “a growling man with a loud clatter in the background.” This is realistic. But later she is able to understand the lyrics of one song, which are spoken in a reverberant, computerized voice, and recognize it as an almost verbatim list of instructions from an old ritual. This is less realistic.
She listens to a lot of music, and seems to be able to make out everything just fine, even hearing slithering noises (which would presumably be out of her hearing range?). Not sure if this is inconsistency or if old cassette players have a higher volume than CD players. (In the film Sixth Sense, Malcolm turns up the volume enough to hear a ghost’s voice, but I don’t know if that’s a supernatural thing or if cassette players actually go up that high.) Later Byron tells her it’s Led Zeppelin singing, not a woman, so maybe she’s just got the Lady Montegreen effect. Like when we were kids my brother thought Godsmack was singing “I, ravioli” instead of “I stand alone.” (He really loved ravioli.)
I wish it was clearer to the reader what exactly was going on with her music-listening.
At the end, it turns out a big reason for her deafness is buildup, as her ears are oddly shaped and difficult to clean. The doctor cleans her ears and she can hear much more than before—seemingly everything—and is hyperaware of sound for a bit. I don’t really like that this comes at the very end, as it comes across as magic cure. It’s just that we have a “happy ending” and the curing of her hearing plays a part of that happiness/hopefulness. As though if she hadn’t gotten her ears cleaned she would have been less happy somehow. I don't know.
October 3, 2009
I can't even believe this book exists. A highly quotable tale of a teen cripple Tarot fanatic who's fighting a nefarious weeding project at her library job?? WTF?!??! It's just too good to be true!
Here are a few less personal, more objective reasons to love Andromeda Klein:
1)Instead of a boyfriend, she acquires a disciple.
2)Her celebrity crush is on A.E. Waite.
3)She lives a life of the mind, unabashedly.
4)Her dad is a Libertarian.
5)It will make you start looking for synchs.
It has been a looooooong time since reading a book made me feel like a member of a secret society. Thanks, Dr. Frank!
Here are a few less personal, more objective reasons to love Andromeda Klein:
1)Instead of a boyfriend, she acquires a disciple.
2)Her celebrity crush is on A.E. Waite.
3)She lives a life of the mind, unabashedly.
4)Her dad is a Libertarian.
5)It will make you start looking for synchs.
It has been a looooooong time since reading a book made me feel like a member of a secret society. Thanks, Dr. Frank!
December 19, 2010
I love old books, I love old libraries... so does Andromeda Klein. I don't like weeding books merely because they are old or unused... neither does Andromeda Klein. I wish she was a teen employee in the Teen Space.
July 10, 2015
So involved in its own world that it forgot to invite the reader in, too.
April 26, 2019
I had such high hopes for this book. I was excited for it all. Unfortunately, while there's nothing wrong with the actual writing ability, the characters and writing style itself are not great. Andromeda is obnoxious. She looks down her nose at Paganism yet everything she does in the book IS PAGANISM no matter how hard the author tries to disguise it as magical theory and "higher learning."
Andromeda is not quirky. She is not eccentric. Alright, maybe she is, but she's also judgmental and rude and boring. I suspect this has WAY more to do with the authors overall opinion of things, which colors the plot and narrative far too deeply and distracts from what could have been an interesting Magical Realism story.
The first 30 or so pages are all hidden jokes between characters we the readers haven't met yet and thus don't care about. It's all weird nicknames taken from number code or magical code or some vague abbreviation of some historical figure far, far back in time. It starts to read like a text book and if I wanted to study magical theory it'd be great but that's not what I wanted when I opened this novel.
I admittedly lost my patience when I got to the part where a male character is described as feminine and then continuously roasted by the narrative. It was clear to me that the tired, toxic masculinity that is social expectations was far more the projection of Frank Portman rather than the opinion of any of his characters. If you can't separate who YOU are from who THEY are, the characters probably won't be very good or hold anyone's interest.
(shrug) 2/10.
Andromeda is not quirky. She is not eccentric. Alright, maybe she is, but she's also judgmental and rude and boring. I suspect this has WAY more to do with the authors overall opinion of things, which colors the plot and narrative far too deeply and distracts from what could have been an interesting Magical Realism story.
The first 30 or so pages are all hidden jokes between characters we the readers haven't met yet and thus don't care about. It's all weird nicknames taken from number code or magical code or some vague abbreviation of some historical figure far, far back in time. It starts to read like a text book and if I wanted to study magical theory it'd be great but that's not what I wanted when I opened this novel.
I admittedly lost my patience when I got to the part where a male character is described as feminine and then continuously roasted by the narrative. It was clear to me that the tired, toxic masculinity that is social expectations was far more the projection of Frank Portman rather than the opinion of any of his characters. If you can't separate who YOU are from who THEY are, the characters probably won't be very good or hold anyone's interest.
(shrug) 2/10.
May 31, 2017
Frank Portman's first book is one of my favourites. That said, upon reading this second book of his, the formula for his storytelling is so front and center that it somewhat hampers the book. Don't get me wrong, it is a good formula and he is great at it. I've never read another author who can so perfectly paint a satirical yet accurate picture of high school life and then tell the story of a colourful yet bland outcast student, and then tie in a surprise twist ending where everything comes together. But this is two books where he did that exact same thing. Granted, Andromeda's tale offers a unique and interesting venture into the world of occultism, but strip that away from her and instead give her an ambition to start a punk rock band, swap her genitals out for a penis and she is not all that distinguishable from the main character of King Dork. The ending of her story felt a contrived and unlikely as well, like through the whole story the narrative wasn't quite sure what kind of climax it was reaching for until it became time to tack one on. But for all that I still did enjoy reading this book. I was very tempted to rate it four stars, because it's still clever, funny and interesting enough to keep those pages turning at a steady pace. Portman is very good writer, but if he wants to be a great one he is going to have to step out of this comfort zone that he has built for himself.
February 14, 2022
I absolutely loved enjoying this book, but I think I was especially primed to because I fall into its relatively niche intended (or I guess, ideal?) audience: I am open to YA fiction as a genre I can enjoy, and I know enough about western occultism that all of the obscure references in this book (of which there are many!) made sense to me. I can see why others felt pretty lost as to what the fuck Andromeda was thinking/saying, especially since you're just dropped into her world and left to orient yourself. Despite a third-person narrator, this book reads not unlike a stream-of-consciousness piece in some respects. I saw another reviewer say it was like reading someone's blog posts, and I can see that, too.
I found the whole thing a little chaotic, deeply engaging, and in some unexpected ways, actually very sweet. It's fun to imagine what it would have been like to have been as well-read of an occultist as Andromeda, back when I was her age. Serious Magicians™ may find this book too irreverent (and/or erroneous) to suit their tastes, but I thought it was a trip. If you're a "woo" (or as Andromeda says, "ouija") friend who has a 101-level awareness of early 20th-century British occultism (and its earlier influences), I think you'll find this one fun.
I found the whole thing a little chaotic, deeply engaging, and in some unexpected ways, actually very sweet. It's fun to imagine what it would have been like to have been as well-read of an occultist as Andromeda, back when I was her age. Serious Magicians™ may find this book too irreverent (and/or erroneous) to suit their tastes, but I thought it was a trip. If you're a "woo" (or as Andromeda says, "ouija") friend who has a 101-level awareness of early 20th-century British occultism (and its earlier influences), I think you'll find this one fun.
May 24, 2017
Here's the good stuff: I enjoyed having Andromeda tell us all her favorite occult books. The library scenes were nice, and her tarot decks sounded so pleasing.
Here's the bad stuff: I really think this book needed another pair of eyes before even sending it to the publishers. This book was really dismissive of any pagan religion and especially of Wicca. I'm not saying that the character needed to be pagan or wiccan at all. I was totally fine with the idea of a magical scientist. However, the tone could have been better suited toward, "She didn't feel it was her journey to take." Also, the ending was too rushed. The romance between Andromeda and Bryon could have been drawn out a bit more. I wish the story more had to do with Her, Bryon, and Breanna (Brenda?).
Here's the bad stuff: I really think this book needed another pair of eyes before even sending it to the publishers. This book was really dismissive of any pagan religion and especially of Wicca. I'm not saying that the character needed to be pagan or wiccan at all. I was totally fine with the idea of a magical scientist. However, the tone could have been better suited toward, "She didn't feel it was her journey to take." Also, the ending was too rushed. The romance between Andromeda and Bryon could have been drawn out a bit more. I wish the story more had to do with Her, Bryon, and Breanna (Brenda?).
June 12, 2017
Honestly, I couldn't get past the first hundred pages. The author tried to hit all the tropes: outcast teen, supernatural stuff, dead friend, unrequited love, strained relationship.
I felt so overwhelmed by all these plot points that the author was using to manipulate the readers emotions that I couldn't connect naturally. I might have liked the story if it wasn't for the in-my-face manipulation.
I felt so overwhelmed by all these plot points that the author was using to manipulate the readers emotions that I couldn't connect naturally. I might have liked the story if it wasn't for the in-my-face manipulation.
October 4, 2019
A great book if you're familiar with Wicca and know a lot of big words. While reading this book, I didn't know what a lot of the words meant so whenever I came upon a word I didn't know, I looked up the definition and wrote it in a notebook. Once I finished the book, I realized that all of the definitions to the words are in the back of the book. I was duped. Still very interesting, just hard to understand at times, at least for me.
December 29, 2017
I loved KING DORK so have been looking forward to this. The amount that I now know about super niche occult and magik is vast. Overall- the narrative felt long but was captivating had many great parts that I imagine will stick with me for a while in my own vocab. Dig the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJg76...
December 17, 2017
If you are keen on Tarot, Magic and the history and practices of metaphysical groups like Order of the Golden Dawn along with teenage angst in a wild mysterious mix, you will like this book. Totally not your average YA book and not all easy reading. I'm glad I bought the hardcover with the paper jacket that has Andromeda's drawings on the other side.
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