Big White Panties

by Dale Alderman

A frightening development is sweeping the nation. Affecting the lives of millions of people, this travesty is eating away at the heart of our society. Rampaging through every community in our great country, this horrible epidemic must be stopped. Ladies, please, we are begging you. Just say no to big white panties. In this hilarious collection of essays about relationships, Dale Alderman explores the different viewpoints men and women have about each other. Although he has been with his wife, Starla, for over twenty years, Dale freely admits that he knows absolutely nothing about women and he has the stories to prove it including: Nothing Says I Love You Like a Leaf Blower, The Thingy Is Going Ggguuurrrgggg, I Want My HGTV, What Is That Smell, Ow, You Are On My Hair, With This Pre-nup I Thee Wed, My Eggs Are Rotting, Boys Do Not Tinkle, and Why Do Men Scratch. Ladies, if you have ever wondered what your man is really thinking, Dale will tell you. Guys, if your lady has ever left you confused and frustrated, you are not alone. Dale has been there, too. To strengthen your relationship, sit on the couch with your soul mate, share a nice box of wine, and laugh out loud at Big White Panties.

Genres: Humor, Nonfiction, Comedy, Book Club, Essays

160 pages, Nook

First published November 22, 2008

Reviews

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book had me in stitches. STITCHES! Every few days I would read one essay before going to bed. I would laugh so hard that I'd be crying and Chris would be shushing me to hold it down or I'd wake up the kids. It was a great stress-reliever. It's as if your funniest, most irreverent friend quit his day job and wrote a book. I made Chris read a few essays and YES he was cracking up too :) I'm going to pick up his other book and I hope he keeps at it. This guy is a RIOT.

[Victoria · Rating 1 out of 5]

Dale and Starla sound like gender caricatures. Look, the "Men and Women Are Different" gig has been done. Some people hate it and find it stale; I think it's safe but still has humor potential. This fell flat. Dale seems like a doofus who can't keep his eyes off of anything in a skirt. Starla seems like an indifferent nag who can't comprehend baseball. And upon these two unhappy creatures, he bases the entirety of both genders. It made me mad. I know guys who think about more than sex and sports. They teach me about culture. I could care less about HGTV--give me a quirky indie flick, cult classic, or police drama any day (Law&Order SVU would be my guilty pleasure). I know my sports...I don't like baseball, but I understand it. I'm a football girl. And the real bummer about this whole book is he thinks he's funny, and makes it obvious he thinks he's funny. NO. I know funny writing. This is not funny writing. P.G. Wodehouse is a humor god. For modern day mentors, he should look to some of my favorites, DOB and Soren Bowie. And I'm still baffled as to why this relationship is being held as the most we should hope for (yes, I get that this was supposed to be funny, but I didn't laugh). Really, this book made me depressed. All he thinks about is...well, dumb. And he's constantly talking about other women in this book. So insensitive. Not funny. Highly sexist. I'm in the middle researching sex crimes and trafficking and prostitution and I read this drivel? It's enough to send me through the roof. Even if it's for "humor" the objectification of women is far more dangerous than many people know. And Starla needs to get over herself and stop wearing flannel. Who can sleep in flannel unless it is sub-zero temperatures anyways? And loose the big white panties...he might stop going on about girls half his age. Yes, I'm ranting. Don't care. He made both genders look horrific.....and it wasn't even funny. I would forgive him all of this if I had just laughed.

[Mark · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dale alderman has a unique perspective on the foibles of men when it comes to figuring out women. This short (VERY short, 106 pages) eBook was an easy read that kept me in stitches. I found myself on more than one occasion recognizing myself, or one of my good buddies, in these tales. I have recommended that my wife read it, and I'll let you know if she thinks it's half as funny as I do!

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

It enjoyed reading this book. Since I had my own experience with the Atkins diet, his writing had me laughing so hard that I couldn't read the section outloud to my husband. I haven't laughed like that in a long time.

[Judith P McLeod · Rating 5 out of 5]

Laugh out loud funny...

And so accurate in his descriptions of dating, marriage, etc. The way he writes makes you feel like you're having lunch and a beer with a good friend.

[Jeannie Weekley · Rating 1 out of 5]

Review of this book

Did not find the book was interesting enough to actually finish it. I would like to discontinue reading this book

[Shelley · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book made me laugh so hard. It is so refreshing to find a book written by a man that is dead on right in so many ways. Alderman talks about the different aspects of relationships between men and women and experiences that he has had during his life. So much of the stuff in here I could relate to, having been married to my husband for 16 years. It just tickled me. Especially the story about gift giving. I read parts of this to my husband and he got cracked up too.

Great book and was well worth my time to read it.

[Carol · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a trifle, a bagatelle, perfect for the beach or the plane. Dale Alderman is a big business guy who had the urge to pick up a pen. While he may be the poorer for it, the world of Erma Bombeck and Dave Barry is the richer. He writes with wry good humor about his life, his family, his kids, and coaching little league. If he had a newspaper column, like Chris Erskine in the Los Angeles Times, I'd be reading it too.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I laughed till I cried in some parts. He may seem like a skirt chasing doofus but Dale paints his characters as he sees them. It is good escapist reading if you need a good chuckle in between those critically acclaimed Oprah books or the latest thriller.

[Anand · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a fun and humourous read, though at times it reminded me of a few cliches (for instance, 'Men are from Mars, Women from Venus'). Nice and easy read on a Sunday if you have nothing else planned.

[Kristin R · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was perfect for a light, quick summer read. It's a lighthearted collection of little essays by Dale Alderman illustrating the differences between men and women. He does it in a way that makes you roll your eyes, but also laugh.

[Roseanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book had been sitting on my Kindle forever and I only recently got around to reading it. Dale Alderman just might now be one of my favorite humor writers! I was entertained the entire time. An easy and quick read (I finished it in a couple of hours), definitely good for some laughs! Enjoy!

[Cate · Rating 1 out of 5]

The writer has a decent sense of humour and style of writing, but it was a pretty sexist (and boring) stereotype of people. If I hadn't been travelling (without other options to read), I probably wouldn't have finished it.

[Issa · Rating 2 out of 5]

A collection of essays, some dragged on a bit but there were some entertaining ones.

[Ashley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute. Some stories really made me laugh. Others didn't. Generally a really cute, quick read.

[Tom · Rating 3 out of 5]

A fairly amusing collection of essays from a male point-of-view.

[Radicaleinzors · Rating 3 out of 5]

Meh. Some of the stories were funny. I had a couple of lulz over the fart story.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha....... very funny.... some sketchy parts but for the most part - - very funny!

[Donna Nickerson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny,Funny book! This guy is a riot!

[Maxie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute and funny, typical male versus female differences but I enjoyed the writers voice and stories. Fun read.

[Sheye · Rating 2 out of 5]

chapter endings are formulaic to the point of interference with the subject matter. I half expected a drummer's barra-ching.

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was hilarious. If you want to know what men are thinking...read this book!! He actually tells you.

[Annie Johnson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Entertaining.

[Jenmarshall · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had some good laughs in this book. Many of his points i've heard before, but his progression kept it fresh. Quick read!

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

Have read this twice now. It was one of the first Kindle eBooks I read, at the recommendation of someone else.
Third time in September 2014

[Liz · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good for a chuckle. Various topics discussing differences between men and women.

[Patricia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute. Funny. A quick light read

[Charlotte · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome!

[Toni · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a good look at the differneces between men and women, done with light humor and no bitterness or anger.

[Farrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious! Highly recommend if you are looking for a quick, clever, fun read that will make you laugh.