Guiding Principles for Life Beyond Victim Consciousness

by Lynne Forrest, Eileen Meagher

"Guiding Principles for Life Beyond Victim Consciousness" deftly describes how most of us move in and out of what Lynne Forrest calls "victim consciousness," and then provides a set of well-defined tools or "Guiding Principles" which can be used to break free of this limiting mindset.  Lynne defines victim consciousness as "the habit of thinking something outside of us is responsible for our happiness or unhappiness."In this remarkably timely and highly significant book, Lynne outlines a step-by-step process for activating what she calls "observer consciousness" which is the antithesis of victim consciousness.In Lynne's own words, "Observer consciousness is a personal state of awareness that allows us to recognize the happenings in our lives as intentional opportunities to further our connection with ourselves and with Source."Lynne is a seasoned professional who has helped and supported her clients through all kinds of life addiction, problematic relationships, spiritual malaise, etc. She uses a unique blend of ideas and methods distilled from the more classic works of Karpman, Byron Katie, Eckhart Tolle, and others, and presents, as a result, a clear, profound, and easy-to-follow program. These methods are grounded in universal and metaphysical principles. "How we deal with life's challenges, not the challenges themselves, determine whether or not we are in victim consciousness."  -Lynne Forrest Read this book if you want to learn to forgive and accept yourself and if you are ready to experience a degree of harmony between you and your loved ones that you may have never thought possible."[I met Lynne] and I was introduced to a 'Higher Way'...(I guess that phrase [applies here], 'When you are ready to learn, the teacher will appear...' and Lynne appeared for me. Lynne is a true healer and my spiritual mentor. Lynne will take you as deep as you are ready to go.  She is a...spiritual mystic."-Nancy K. Miller

Genres: Psychology

180 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2011

Reviews

[Jude Arnold · Rating 5 out of 5]

In June 2016 my therapist said "if you move beyond victim consciousness you graduate from therapy; you won't need me anymore!" I then found and began studying Lynne Forrest’s book, Guiding Principles for Life BEYOND VICTIM CONSCIOUSNESS. It’s a book I think everyone would benefit from as it has great healing potential! We're all spinning around in ourselves and in our relationships. Around and around. We think we've been abused. We think that gives us the right to disrespect other's boundaries. We become abusive. Round and Round. I'm ready to get off this ride. Are you?

“Victim consciousness is an energy field created by negative mental thoughts [inherited or inflicted] that are strengthened and empowered by unhealthy beliefs.”
We verify these unhealthy beliefs through the three roles found on the victim triangle. Picture an upside down triangle. The Victim is at the bottom; The Rescuer and the Persecutor are the top two points of the triangle. Interacting from one of these roles is the only style of relating many of us know. When I’m in victim consciousness I identify most and get hooked into playing first the role of Rescuer, believing my own personal needs are irrelevant. Prosecutors believe they constantly need to protect themselves. Victims believe they are weak and need someone to rescue them.

It is possible to transform the upside down victim triangle into a right side up triangle of health and well-being. We interact with ourselves and others differently when we respond from the higher frequencies of these roles: The Observer (top), The Nurturer and The Asserter. To become the Observer is to be our best self and compassionate witnesses to life circumstances. The Nurturer focuses on taking care of self first and only then extends a hand to others. The Asserter perceives life as positively abundant and radiates self assurance.

“How we deal with life’s challenges, not the challenges themselves, determines whether or not we are in victim consciousness.” In other words, the only thing we can control in the circumstances life presents is our reaction.

There are 3 steps to wake up and recover from victim consciousness: show up, align and clear. I acknowledge myself with gratitude for showing up (being present and willing) for myself these last 5 years especially. I align with a higher frequency in my commitment and intention to a daily practice of meditation, yoga, prayer and music. Techniques I find invaluable to clear negative beliefs, thoughts and feelings, include Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping), “The Work” of Byron Katie, and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (Journaling.)

“Observer consciousness is a personal state of awareness that allows us to recognize the happenings in our lives as intentional opportunities to further our connection with ourselves and with Source.” I’m really impressed with the healing power of these skills in my mental health toolbox; and very grateful to Lynne Forrest and my other teachers for giving me hope. There are no mistakes, ever. The Universe is unfolding as it should; it always has and it always will.

[Connor Pritchard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Whenever I cross paths with an interesting stranger, I always ask them for a life-changing book recommendation. I recently met a chiropractor who told me to read Lynne's book. The principles are fairly simple and straight forward, but they will change the way you look at your relationships and the political situation in America. Short, profound and instantly applicable to your life. Highly recommend for anyone on a spiritual journey of self improvement.

[Dorothy Nesbit · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have long been familiar with Karpman's work on the drama triangle and I followed up on a mention of Lynne Forrest's work after she was mentioned by someone I respect. I bought her book after reading her article on the drama triangle which sits on her website. I thought the article was excellent. I had high expectations of the book and felt some disappointment on reading it. For me, it was a bit of a "parson's egg" of a book - good in parts.

The parts I found valuable? There is a useful introduction to the Victim Triangle (as Forrest terms it) in Chapter 6, along with a description of the difference between observer consciousness and victim consciousness in Chapter 5. Together, these chapters help to identify both the drama triangle and the roles of the drama triangle and at a high level, how we get off it. I found her chapter (Chapter 3) on Self Responsibility helpful, both in identifying what we do to avoid self Responsibility and what we do to embrace it. There is also more detailed information about methods for getting off the drama triangle and these I found helpful, including The Core Belief Cycle (Chapter 6.)

What did I find less helpful? I am not sold on the idea of "high-" and "low-" frequency thoughts and feelings. I would love to see a more compassionate approach and a more scientific approach, such as I find in Sarah Peyton's work, for example. Anyone who is living out of unhealed "core beliefs" has underlying trauma that needs healing over time. It seems to me to be unhelpful to use language to describe that trauma that seems to punish people who have already experienced the impact of various experiences at a time in their life when they had neither the skills they needed to accompany themselves nor the resonant accompaniment of others.

My main conclusion about this book is that it builds on the article on Forrest's website, but not enough and not well enough for me to want to recommend the book. I am basically saying that Karpman's work retains its value and Forrest's website article is a valuable explanation of Karpman's concept. I'm less confident of the value of Forrest's book.

[Taylor Ellwood · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book explores how to move beyond victim consciousness by learning how to recognize when you are engaged in a victim mentality and then creating distance between yourself and the thoughts and emotions by observing them. The book has a couple good practices it recommends, though it never fully takes off from the theoretical. Additionally the author uses italics and bold way too much in the text and I question whether she’s really experienced trauma because of how she brushes off traumatic events. While I think the practices shared in this book have value, I also think the author is a bit out of touch.