Runaway: Diary of a Street Kid

by Evelyn Lau

Bright and talented, but at odds with her parents, 14-year-old Evelyn Lau ran away to spend the next two years submerged in drugs, prostitution and despair on the streets of Vancouver. The journals she kept provide an account of life on the streets for a young girl.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Biography, Canada, Autobiography, Biography Memoir, Womens

272 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 1989

About the author

Evelyn Lau was born July 2, 1971 in Vancouver, British Columbia to Chinese-Canadian parents, who intended for her to eventually become a doctor. Her parents' ambitions for her were wholly irreconcilable with her own; consequently, her home and school lives were desperately unhappy. In 1986 she ran away from her unbearable existence as a pariah in school and tyrannized daughter at home.

Lau began publishing poetry at the age of 12; her creative efforts helped her escape the pressure of home and school. In 1985, at age 14, Lau left home and spent the next several years living itinerantly in Vancouver as a homeless person, sleeping mainly in shelters, friends' homes and on the street and often supporting herself by selling her body to much older men.

Despite the chaos of her first two years' independence she submitted a great deal of poetry to journals and received some recognition. A diary she kept at the time was published in 1989 as Runaway: Diary of a Street Kid. The book was a critical and commercial success. Topics and individuals discussed in the book include some of Lau's various relationships with manipulative older men, the life and habits of a group of anarchists with whom she stayed immediately after leaving home, Lau's experiences with a couple from Boston who smuggled her into the United States, her abuse of various drugs, and her relationship with British Columbia's child support services. The film The Diary of Evelyn Lau (1993) starred Korean-Canadian actress Sandra Oh.

Lau had a well-publicized romantic relationship with University of Victoria creative writing professor and author W. P. Kinsella which led to the filing of a libel case against her[3]. She currently lives in Vancouver, where she freelances as a manuscript consultant in Simon Fraser University's Writing and Publishing Program. For invitations to poetry readings and festivals, the author may be contacted through Oolichan Books.

Reviews

[Krystal · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was hard to read. I know it was supposed to portraying a harrowing period in the life of Evelyn Lau, now poet laureate of Vancouver, but is still difficult to read. At first, it was at first heart-breaking to read about Lau's transition from an unhappy suburban, repressed existence, to a street kid in a world of drugs and prostitution, and then kind of tediously disturbing as it settled into the pattern of an addict unable to break from various addictions. It's full of candor and naivety and the kind of intelligence that produces incredibly on-the-nose insights and self-awareness, which do not translate to any abilities to strategically manipulate events or people - it's endearing and genuine, but, pragmatically speaking, not optimal.

I gave it 2 stars because I admittedly did not like it; the writing is extraordinary for a teenager, but not a joy to read. It's like that time that I watched the 4-hour documentary about an insane asylum in Yunan, at VIFF. About 300% too long. But the length is necessary to convey the misery and feeling of being trapped. It is, however, an impactful reading experience that I would recommend.

[Clover]

This book caught my eye because she's Chinese and lives in Vancouver (like me!!!). But to be honest this book is a real downer. She goes on and on about the horrific time she has trying to get away from her parents and taking too many drugs. It's kind of TOO MUCH. I mean it is a teenager's diary so pretty much by definition it's got to be miserable right? And it's cool that it's a REAL diary; I have so much respect for that. As a book though I don't think I'll be coming back to this unless I were feeling gross too and wanted to commiserate with Evelyn.

[Zoe · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Epilogue summed it up. Here was a street kid. You saw into her mind, into her feelings of hopelessness. Fending for herself at a young age. It was a frustrating read at times because you were caught in her world. But it gave me the insights I had hoped for upon picking up the book :)

[Ceeceereads · Rating 2 out of 5]

I tried this one but didn’t gel with the format- diary excerpts of a runaway teen. It read more as daily instalments written by a teenager rather than the insightful reflections I had been anticipating.

[Nina Staum · Rating 4 out of 5]

A reread for me. I first read this book when I was about the age that Evelyn is in the book, and I'm now reading it as a parent to kids that age.

This book is impossible to put down both now and then. Evelyn leaves her abusive childhood home at 14, and turns to a life of prostitution and addiction. When I read this as a teenager, Evelyn was a tragic hero, fighting the good fight against repression, writing with wild passion and preferring to self-destruct rather than be unheard and mediocre.

My expectation on this reread was that I would feel pity or judgement for Evelyn. It's a testament to her skill as a writer that I did not. Even as a mom, I admired her as someone with a rare initiative and bravery to change her life. I was with her on every mistake and bad decision and paralyzing moment of self-doubt. The world building in this book, of Vancouver's streets in the 80s, is so real and specific that it breaks your heart over and over.

This book is not without flaws. It is a diary, and other reviewers have correctly noted that it's depressing, glorifies addiction and terrible life choices and ends in a really random spot with no narrative pay off. She's too young and the wounds are too fresh for character development. So, not everyone is going to like this - and as far as I'm concerned, their loss.

[Brian Cham · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very interesting autobiography/diary of a young teenager who runs away from home and becomes a drug addicted prostitute. It's about as depressing as the premise would suggest, and goes to depths I didn't know were possible, especially when she encounters so many people who have experienced the same thing. The first-person diary perspective makes it very fascinating and unique as it reveals an utterly naive perspective where she thinks she is the one in control of her life (hint: she isn't). This is a far cry from the lucid and mature perspective we would see if she wrote this entirely from an adult perspective like in the epilogue. The writing is rambling and repetitive at times and often skips over large sections of time that should have been included, but is otherwise straightforward (she seems to think she's a literary genius though). What struck me was how much she engaged in self-sabotaging behaviour, squandered so many opportunities to improve her life and trusted people she knew she should not have. I was mostly impressed by Dr. Hightower's patience and sympathy after everyone else had given up on her. To be honest, despite my initial sympathy with her situation, I found it hard to empathise with all her boneheaded decisions and emotions no matter how she tried to explain herself.

[Anne · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a challenging read both because the author's 14 year old self describes regular sexual assaults with the casual flippancy of someone for whom that is daily life. It's also reads like what it is: excerpts from a teen's diary. Every emotion and consequence is heightened, though because of her experiences this ranges from not wearing the right clothes to school to illegally crossing a border with fake ID (definitely a pre-9/11 read). Also interesting from a socio-historical point of view as it takes place largely in the Downtown Eastside just after Expo-'86 and there are references to the evictions and attempts to "clean up" the area along with the Granville Strip. This was largely done by pushing people away from homes and businesses to the more desolate industrial parts to tragic results.

[Wren · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant writing. There were so many times when I wanted to hold Evelyn and tell her it would be all right, and sometimes I wanted to shake her and tell herself to get together. A brilliant (cannot say this enough) piece. The glimpse into her mind showed me that there were similarities between us, despite me leading a completely different life, such as the inability to fit in well or feel apart from other people. Couldn't put the book down, and it really increased my need to write in my own diary. Definitely a recommended read.

[Lester · Rating 5 out of 5]

When a writer writes words for others to read..and those words are so deeply personal..that life lived written for others to read, watch, absorb..that writer always deserves the respect of the readers.

This was a difficult book to read. I have heart sisters that lived/existed in/on Vancouver Eastside..as young as when Evelyn began existing there. I hold my friends very close and listen deeply when they talk..and when they don't.

All these years later after Evelyn writing this book..thank you Evelyn..thank you.

[Victor Lavoie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good story.
Difficult to follow at times but I guess drugs and poetry will do that.

[NancyB · Rating 5 out of 5]

I bought another book by this author, Inside out, at a book sale. When I started reading it, I realized it referred to this one. I stopped reading Inside out and bought Runaway, to get the whole picture. I have no regrets. Runaway was a hard read because of its content, but wonderfully written, and even more fascinating considering it goes into the author’s mind as she was just a teenager. It is a raw, honest and mesmerizing story. Will restart reading Inside out, now.

[Sabrina Rutter · Rating 1 out of 5]

I spent a lot of time on this book becuase I read it while I was in the middle of a move and didn't have much time for reading. I thought that I wasn't enjoying it due to the amount of time I spent on it, but after sitting down determined to finsh this one I decided I just don't like it. Evelyn is definantly a great writer, but this book is slow in my opinion. She focuses on the people treating her and her interactions with them more than what she does in between the times of her doctor, and various social worker visits.
Since I read half of the book I don't know if Evelyn ever went back home to her parents, but I will say up to the point I read to she didn't give them another chance once she had run away and made her feelings known in a very strong way.
I'm not finishing this one because it is just way to depressing for me. I usually enjoy these type of books, but this one just seems to be one long letter of complaint. Evelyn messes things up even when they are going her way and I just can't stand to read another page of this book. She claims to be an ultra smart teenager, and while that may be true for her academically she definantly runs short in common sense.

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I still clearly remember this book after reading it about 25 years ago - that, to me, is one of the signs of a good book. It is an honest and unapologetic account of life on the streets. It may be depressing and frustrating to read in some parts, but that’s what makes it so good and so true - cliché as it may sound, sometimes reality sucks.






As an aside, I am surprised at some of the negative reviews by people simply because they thought the author was ungrateful for the help offered to her. I feel these are the same people that step over homeless people while saying they should just stop being addicts and get a job. It’s that easy, is it?

[Erin Emily · Rating 1 out of 5]

So far I find this book really annoying. It's incredibly well-written, but it really is a teenager's diary: whiny. I find it REALLY hard to sympathize with Lau in this book, and I fear this will come abandoned.

[kim · Rating 2 out of 5]

blah blah blah

[Krisz · Rating 1 out of 5]

Tömören:
Ha egy drogos könyvet olvastál, már mindet olvastad. Azaz Kubiszyn Viktor Drognaplója olyan mélyen és olyan irodalmian rántott le a mocsokba, hogy ez a könyv már nem tudott újat mondani. Legfeljebb annyit, hogy egy lánynak miben más a függőség, de azt magamtól is kitaláltam, sőt, sokkal durvábbnak képzeltem… persze az ott Kanada, ez meg itt Magyarország. Nálunk nem kapna egy 16 éves gyerek saját lakást, csak azért, mert drogozik szegény…
Hosszabban:
Egyszerűen nem tudtam egyetérteni és együtt érezni ezzel az egésszel. Ha egy gyereket ver az apja és folyton szobafogságra ítélik, mentálisan, verbálisan bántalmazzák, akkor hogy lehet, hogy a szociális munkások erőltetik, hogy menjen vissza a gyerek a családba? Nem inkább a családot kellett volna megvizsgálni? Az is csak kb. a könyv közepén derült ki, hogy a lánynak van kistestvére. A gyámügyesek hogyhogy nem szálltak rá a szülőkre és figyelték meg, hogyan bánnak a kicsi lánnyal?
A másik, ami zavart, bár értem, hogy a napló nagyon tinédzseresen önközpontú volt. Ha már megjelenik és irodalomként tekintünk rá, akkor én igenis elvárom, hogy legyen irodalmi értéke, és tárja fel előttünk a szülők és a gyerek kapcsolatát, lássuk a két szemünkkel azt, amit csak a kislánytól és csupán érintőlegesen hallunk: jaj, a szüleim rosszul bántak velem. Mert számomra egyértelmű, hogy a szülőnek joga van szobafogságra ítélni a gyerekét, joga van azt mondani neki, hogy barátnőzés és fiúzás helyett inkább tanuljon. Még megütni is joga van, amúgy, ami kész szerencse, különben a családok 99%-át szét kellene szakítani véletlen balesetek és felháborodások miatt. Szóval ha ennyi az ok, az még kevés. Azt kellett volna bemutatni, hogy pszichésen mit jelentett ebben a családban felnőni, és hát ezt nem sikerült.
Zavart a sok szerencsétlenkedés, annak ellenére, hogy értettem az okát: egy normális tini is sorra hoz rossz döntéseket, hát még egy burokban nevelt. Szóval ez valóságos, csak éppen egy könyvben már zavaró, ahogy a cselekmény újra és újra ismétlődik. Volt is itt egy kb. 50 oldal, amit simán átugrottam.
Ha objektíven végiggondolom, ad-e ez a könyv valakinek valamit, sajnos arra a következtetésre jutok, hogy nem. Talán egy drogfüggőnek egy tiszta pillanatában érdemes a kezébe vennie, de ha már egyetlen könyvet választ, akkor meg nem EZT ajánlanám, hanem a Drognaplót, szóval…

[Gdybym-wiedziała · Rating 4 out of 5]

Książka opowiada o ucieczce z domu, nie tylko fizycznej, ale przede wszystkim emocjonalnej. Lau opisuje swoje życie na ulicy, prostytucję, uzależnienie od narkotyków, relacje z mężczyznami pełne przemocy, a także głęboką depresję. Pisze o tym wszystkim z brutalną szczerością, a jednocześnie z pragnieniem ocalenia siebie poprzez pisanie.
Już jako dziecko wiedziała, że chce być pisarką:

„Kiedy miałam sześć lat, postanowiłam zostać pisarką. To nie był przelotny kaprys; wiedziałam, że mogę to robić dobrze i czerpać z tego radość (...). Już wtedy ważne było dla mnie oderwanie się od rzeczywistości.”

Pisanie było dla niej nie tylko pasją, ale i sposobem na przetrwanie. Z czasem dziennik stał się schronieniem, przestrzenią, w której mogła bezpiecznie rozpakować swoje emocje:

„Jednocześnie pragnę być sobą, pragnę pisać w dzienniku o wszystkich problemach, zamiast je dusić w sobie, spychać narkotykami do podświadomości. Pragnę czuć się pełnowartościowa, zdrowa i szczęśliwa, chcę sobie radzić ze wszystkim bez prochów”.

To nie tylko książka o życiu na ulicy, to opowieść o przetrwaniu. O kruchości i sile. I o tym, że słowo może ocalić wtedy, gdy wszystko inne zawodzi.

[Joss · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read Runaway: Diary of a Street Kid by Evelyn Lau back in college for a creative writing elective, and honestly, it completely changed how I feel about reading. Before that class, I never cared much for books, but this one along with another memoir I read at the time, opened my eyes. Within four months, I went from hating reading to falling in love with it, and it’s all because of stories like this.

Yes, the book can be dark and disturbing at times, but that’s what makes it so powerful. Evelyn’s story is raw, emotional, and brutally honest. It reminds you that not every story is sunshine and rainbows, but sometimes, sharing the hard parts of your life is what helps you (and others) heal.

This book made me truly appreciate storytelling and the courage it takes to share your truth. I 100% recommend Runaway: Diary of a Street Kid. It’s one of those books that sticks with you long after you’ve finished reading. They also made a movie from this book about it, I can’t wait to watch it! Heard it’s good.

[Dorote Lin · Rating 3 out of 5]

It is difficult to judge whether this is book is good simply based on my level of enjoyment. The book was very frustrating, and I found myself skipping big chunks as a result. That being said, this book is a highly realistic and raw portrayal of the inner workings of a child who is experiencing homelessness and struggling with substances - the frustration is inevitable. Although the writing is incredible, the overall lack of a bigger picture in her mind throughout the book (and this is not on her, she is literally 15) makes it a hard read. It was very repetitive and reminded me of my own journals in high school (possibly why I found it aggravating). I am curious as to what the author thinks of the book now.

[Lectures · Rating 2 out of 5]

I finally finished Runaway diary of a street kid by Evelyn Lau after many days struggling to get through the first half. I found it really hard to read and was conflicted at the start to wether or not I was giving it my full attention, it wasn’t until about half way that I realised that it was just not for me.
It was a very slow read, the same theme dragged on throughout the whole book (very repetitive).

Evelyn Lau writes about transitioning from honour student to street kid at just fourteen years old. Evelyn ran away to spend two years submerged in drugs, prostitution and despair on the streets.

[Nicole C · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bravo to Evelyn Lau for chronicling her journey in the streets and through drug addiction. This is a raw account where you can very much feel the detached, isolated, hurt person she was. It feels weird rating this because how are you supposed to rate someone's life? I like that Lau is honest in her memoir and she doesn't sugarcoat a perfect happy ending.
I do think the book is a little long as I skimmed through towards the end, but as Lau mentions, her first draft was much longer and it was hard cutting things out.

[Korea Herald Books Podcast · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of Beth's picks for AAPI Heritage Month 2022.
This book would be among the most influential ones I read as a teenager. It inspired me to broaden my perceptions of how someone of Asian descent and from an immigrant background could be in the world -- as an artist, writer and human being. It's heartbreaking and difficult to read at times, but breathlessly addictive. It really shifted my paradigm on how honest someone could be on the page about shame, desire, addiction and trauma.

[Marilou · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting read, to say the least. This book is at the junction of many things: memoirs about living on the streets, addiction and prostitution, yes, but also writing, trauma and healing. I’d say go ahead and read it if you are interested in psychology, you’re gonna enjoy it for sure.

I think I would have enjoyed it more had I not read another memoir about addiction a week ago—my bad!

[Tina · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had to read this for one of my classes and although we only had to read half way, I decided to finish it. The book was a little repetitive but I get it, it was basically her struggle with addiction and prostitution over a 2 year time period. It’s hard experiencing that as a teenager but nothing stood out.

[Therese Bergwall · Rating 3 out of 5]

Läst på svenska: Gatans barn

[Evan Mitchell]

Great book reflecting on substance abuse and overcoming many issues.

[Rhiannon Rabby | 31 · Rating 1 out of 5]

It was very introspective and I wanted to like it so badly, but I just didn’t enjoy it.

[Natalie Gladwish · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5⭐️ heavy heavy stuff, I found it to be incredibly hard to read/follow. Definitely changed the way I think and my perspective.

[Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow. I wish I read this in highschool.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

"There is so much that I still dare to want to change. Everywhere I turn there is somebody who is innocent, who is doing good and who is being crucified for it.

I see myself going nowhere, running constantly, wishing to hide in a different personality, behind a different mask. Moving, but in circles. Trying to run away from life and from its eyesores that only the truly brave can face and attempt to change. It will go on and on: somebody being battered by rain down on Skid Row, on any street in any city, and people walking by. You give up after a while or else you go crazy.

Some people do beautiful things, once or twice in their lives, and create something for somebody else—a freedom, a glimmer of hope. Each of us measures happiness differently. If all of us could just be brought down to the lowest rung of existence, wouldn't we understand better what happiness is about?

Another move. Barren walls. Going nowhere, leaving behind (now it seems, as it does each time) everything. The ashtray sitting lonely on the windowsill, smeared with ashes. The closet with one T-shirt hanging. Suitcases and backpacks waiting for morning.

I want to do something good in this world. I want a life for myself, a life not chosen at random and too easily disposed of, but a life that will create something concrete for people. It isn't enough just to have visions but nothing in my hands to give.

I don't know how to live reasonably. I don't know how to stop from being hurt at the most insignificant things, from being overresponsive to people, except by shutting and locking doors firmly, checking them twice to make sure no one can penetrate. How does one manage?

I want people to be good to each other, but I don't know how to begin changing anything because I myself can barely cope with other people and with being alive."

At the age of 14, Evelyn Lau ran away from home. This book, comprised of journal entries from that, detail her eventual spiral into drugs and prostitution

Sometimes you forget you're reading a "real" journal when reading this book, and then you'll forget that you're reading the words of a 14-year-old Chinese-Canadian girl. I put "real" in quotations because I do believe that the book was heavily edited, and I gave it four stars instead of five because there are clunky parts that seem to have been inserted after everything had been "said and done", things that might not have actually been part of her original journals. Of course, we'll never know, which is the draw for creative non-fiction for me. Still, this book was published when she was only 18-years-old, and she had to fight from there on to be taken seriously as a writer and not just some extremely talented young writer who was meant to be a "one-shot" wonder, a young girl who fell into drugs and prostitution.

I would recommend this for fans of Asian-American literature, as well as those interested in first-person narratives, especially those with dealing with minorities, drug addictions, etc. Be warned that it can be a very triggering book, however, as Evelyn is very forthright with many aspects of the life she was living on the street--but her honesty is part of what makes the book such a captivating read.