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Weightless: Making Peace with Your Body
Countless women today are weighted down by the thought that they are not thin enough, pretty enough, young enough, or good enough. While bookstore shelves are well stocked with advice on how to overcome body image problems, very few take a faith-based, much less Catholic, approach to self-healing. Making Peace With Your Body speaks not only to those who may have faced an eating disorder, but also to anyone who wants to live an abundant life, unencumbered by society's obsession with thinness, physical beauty, youth, or food.
Weightless Personal stories that debunk cultural myths about beauty Spiritual tools to help address common struggles Meditations to reshape the way a woman views herself Discussion questions for personal or group reflection
Weightless Personal stories that debunk cultural myths about beauty Spiritual tools to help address common struggles Meditations to reshape the way a woman views herself Discussion questions for personal or group reflection
- GenresCatholicNonfiction
89 pages, Paperback
First published July 5, 2011
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
June 11, 2012
This book is for every American woman who has body issues. (Shall we all raise our hands in unison?) In many ways, I came to terms with body image some time ago. However, no one is immune and every so often I will find myself beating back the mental need to measure up to someone else's terms. This book is good spiritual medicine for those times. I wish I could afford to give it to every woman I know, young or old.
Years later, as a married woman with young daughters, Wicker realized that, although there is a plethora of books about handling self worth problems tied to body image, there are very few that offer a Catholic, faith-filled approach. Luckily for all the rest of us, she wrote a book about what she'd learned.
Wicker doesn't restrict the insights to weight. She looks at how media, celebrity culture, and consumer-driven society combine to affect our ideas of beauty from every angle. We respond to these with varying degrees of make up, clothing, hairstyles, eating habits, and more. Wicker helps provide much needed balance in this easy-to-read, personable book which I enjoyed. She leans on saints, scripture, and solid common sense to pull readers back to center as they reflect on reality versus false standards.
Here's something that spoke to me, not because I'm ninety but because I have suddenly noticed that "old lady skin" is a new feature added to my frame. With that realization, came a new struggle of which standards to apply, and an appreciation for Wicker's refusal to budge in reminding women of every age that beauty begins beneath the surface.
If we apply this sort of realization to whatever issues are bothering us, whether we are young or old, then we can see how important it is to have inner peace about our perceived "imperfections" ... which many would tell us are not imperfections at all. Wicker's book does this in a beautiful, nonjudgmental way that helps us see how to take the first steps in looking beneath the surface.
I am not a fan of self-help books in general, but this is a good book, especially for women who might be stressing over their looks. She makes valid points for all women but the Catholic orientation means that non-Christian friends are not going to get much from the advice about God in here. However, you don't have to be Catholic to get good advice and insights from this book. Highly recommended.
===========================
* You deserve a longer letter than this; it is my unhappy fate seldom to treat people as well as they deserve. — Jane Austen
I should have reviewed this book a long time ago. My apologies to the author who did not deserve me only getting around to reviewing her excellent book now.
Have you noticed how babies delight in their reflections? When they catch glimpses of themselves in a mirror, they smile, squeal, or laugh. When my girls were babies, they would even lean toward the mirror to give their images big wet kisses.Like many girls and women, Kate Wicker struggled with her weight and measured her self worth by how thin or fat she was. After falling prey to bulemia, she went through the long process of realizing self-worth and fighting her way back to health. She relied not only on therapy, family and friends but also on God for inner healing.
How many of us ever feel like kissing the reflection that stares back at us when we give ourselves the once-over in what might be more aptly referred to as the "lambasting glass" than the "looking glass?" The truth is, when faced with our images, many of us stop liking what we see. That big pimple on my chin sure isn't pretty. My arms aren't toned enough. My backside looks bigger today than it did yesterday. Wouldn't it be nice to look more like so-and-so?
You get the picture.
But God doesn't see that picture. He doesn't see what we see at all. God loves what he created — curvy, rifle-thin, disabled, or disfigured. We're his art, his creation.
When we criticize our reflections, we're not seeing clearly. We're blind to the kind of pure, unconditional love that God has for each of us.
Years later, as a married woman with young daughters, Wicker realized that, although there is a plethora of books about handling self worth problems tied to body image, there are very few that offer a Catholic, faith-filled approach. Luckily for all the rest of us, she wrote a book about what she'd learned.
Wicker doesn't restrict the insights to weight. She looks at how media, celebrity culture, and consumer-driven society combine to affect our ideas of beauty from every angle. We respond to these with varying degrees of make up, clothing, hairstyles, eating habits, and more. Wicker helps provide much needed balance in this easy-to-read, personable book which I enjoyed. She leans on saints, scripture, and solid common sense to pull readers back to center as they reflect on reality versus false standards.
Here's something that spoke to me, not because I'm ninety but because I have suddenly noticed that "old lady skin" is a new feature added to my frame. With that realization, came a new struggle of which standards to apply, and an appreciation for Wicker's refusal to budge in reminding women of every age that beauty begins beneath the surface.
My grandmother has no qualms about admitting she needs hearing aides. When you ask her (loudly), "How do you feel?" she replies, laughing and with a twinkle in her liquid blue eyes, "Old."You don't have to be aging yourself to realize the wisdom in this. How many of us know old women dying their hair to hide the white or gray? What about the youthful clothing worn by some women who are grandmothers? Here's the scoop, ladies. You are fooling no one but yourselves.
Nana's age is not a handicap or a source of angst. It is her joy and this is what makes her beautiful. She is well-worn and creased because, she will tell you, she has lived a long, fruitful life, including raising nine children. She's been around long enough to hold great-grandchildren. She prayed to St. Joseph as her husband of almost sixty years sipped into God's care.
To Nana, wrinkles aren't something to be punished with; they're something you earn, God willing. Although she admits that sometimes it's difficult to be aware of your body growing feeble and deteriorating physically, prayer reminds her that every day is a gift to be unwrapped and lived. ...
When I think of the saying "Age before beauty," an image of my old, crinkly grandmother pops up almost immediately. I see so much more than the signs of old age in her. She possesses an ageless, almost supernatural beauty that comes from leading a life of getting to know God better. She's living proof that gray hair is "a crown of glory...gained in a righteous life" (Proverbs 16:31).
Nana doesn't fix her gaze on her age; she's too busy looking ahead to the age to come — the promise of eternity and a new, glorified body in union with Christ. Her faith, her goodness, and her acceptance of her mortal body holding an immortal soul are what make her lovely.
If we apply this sort of realization to whatever issues are bothering us, whether we are young or old, then we can see how important it is to have inner peace about our perceived "imperfections" ... which many would tell us are not imperfections at all. Wicker's book does this in a beautiful, nonjudgmental way that helps us see how to take the first steps in looking beneath the surface.
I am not a fan of self-help books in general, but this is a good book, especially for women who might be stressing over their looks. She makes valid points for all women but the Catholic orientation means that non-Christian friends are not going to get much from the advice about God in here. However, you don't have to be Catholic to get good advice and insights from this book. Highly recommended.
===========================
* You deserve a longer letter than this; it is my unhappy fate seldom to treat people as well as they deserve. — Jane Austen
I should have reviewed this book a long time ago. My apologies to the author who did not deserve me only getting around to reviewing her excellent book now.
May 1, 2017
I read this for an academic purpose and thought it was an interesting little book (only 89 pages). It doesn't feel as if the author talks down to you, and I thought she did a good job of dealing with weight issues, beauty, and ageing (I skipped the chapter on mothers being childfree myself). I liked that she kept returning to the view that we shouldn't get hung up on what we look like as age, and possibly illness, will change us but we should focus on being the best we can and love ourselves as we are. Rating: 4 stars.
August 11, 2016
I wasn't sure if I could read this at first, as at the beginning the author goes into her own eating disorder experience. Such recollections are often difficult for me to read, as they dredge up unpleasant parallels to my own eating disorder. I also get frustrated when I read about how other people seem to check off the boxes of recovery—admit problem, tell family, go to counseling, etc.—and emerge healed. It hasn't worked that way for me. Thankfully, though, that portion of the book is really quite brief, so I'm glad I pressed on.
I liked the balanced, empathetic, and intelligent approach that the author has. The biggest take-away message for me was just how much God loves me—no matter what I look like. It sounds simple, but it's an extremely worthy message that really hit home.
I also liked how short the book is. I often find non-fiction to be daunting and tedious, but at just under 90 pages, this was something I could handle. There were portions of it that I had a hard time concentrating on, but in general the writing style goes down smoothly. My favorite parts of the book, and what I feel is the main highlight of it, were the practical and applicable tips she provided.
There was quite a bit of stuff dealing with motherhood and raising kids, but for the most part I still found those parts to be interesting even if they don't apply to me right now. Sometimes the tone of the book comes off as a little too rah-rah, and it seems like the author has everything figured out, but that might just be due to my perspective or mood when reading this.
I don't agree with everything the author says, but I would say the positives far outweighed the negatives. An example of something I would've changed was when she says to find your healthy weight and “try to stick within a few pounds of it.” I think it is better to focus on healthy habits (e.g., exercise, honoring hunger and satiety signals, eating healthy foods . . . all easier said than done, no doubt) rather than having any kind of enslavement to a number on the scale. I feel sure this is a sentiment she would agree with, so perhaps it was just an unfortunate choice of wording. She also mentions fasting for devotional reasons, which is something I think people with past food issues would need to be very careful with. It can be very triggering and also serve to mask restriction.
Overall, though, this was a pretty good book, and I would definitely recommend to others. It was really nice to read something about this topic from a Catholic perspective, and I feel like I gleaned some valuable insights from it.
I liked the balanced, empathetic, and intelligent approach that the author has. The biggest take-away message for me was just how much God loves me—no matter what I look like. It sounds simple, but it's an extremely worthy message that really hit home.
I also liked how short the book is. I often find non-fiction to be daunting and tedious, but at just under 90 pages, this was something I could handle. There were portions of it that I had a hard time concentrating on, but in general the writing style goes down smoothly. My favorite parts of the book, and what I feel is the main highlight of it, were the practical and applicable tips she provided.
There was quite a bit of stuff dealing with motherhood and raising kids, but for the most part I still found those parts to be interesting even if they don't apply to me right now. Sometimes the tone of the book comes off as a little too rah-rah, and it seems like the author has everything figured out, but that might just be due to my perspective or mood when reading this.
I don't agree with everything the author says, but I would say the positives far outweighed the negatives. An example of something I would've changed was when she says to find your healthy weight and “try to stick within a few pounds of it.” I think it is better to focus on healthy habits (e.g., exercise, honoring hunger and satiety signals, eating healthy foods . . . all easier said than done, no doubt) rather than having any kind of enslavement to a number on the scale. I feel sure this is a sentiment she would agree with, so perhaps it was just an unfortunate choice of wording. She also mentions fasting for devotional reasons, which is something I think people with past food issues would need to be very careful with. It can be very triggering and also serve to mask restriction.
Overall, though, this was a pretty good book, and I would definitely recommend to others. It was really nice to read something about this topic from a Catholic perspective, and I feel like I gleaned some valuable insights from it.
September 15, 2011
Weightless is the kind of book I need to buy in bulk, because it's the kind of book I think just about every woman I know needs to read. What woman hasn't questioned her physical appearance, wondered if she should change, felt a prick of unsurety in the face of a full-length mirror?
Kate Wicker is no stranger to body image issues, and she speaks to the reader as if to a close friend--the kind of friend you can tell the hard stuff to, with complete honesty. Kate shares her struggles candidly, even as she pushes you to seek the higher way.
Kate speaks to the hidden part of each of us, to that small voice that whispers, when we least need it, that our butt's too big or that he can find someone better looking (as though that's his top priority anyway). Kate brings the love of Jesus to her readers, even as she makes you smile and want to hug her.
Don't miss this book. Every woman I know deserves a copy.
Kate Wicker is no stranger to body image issues, and she speaks to the reader as if to a close friend--the kind of friend you can tell the hard stuff to, with complete honesty. Kate shares her struggles candidly, even as she pushes you to seek the higher way.
Kate speaks to the hidden part of each of us, to that small voice that whispers, when we least need it, that our butt's too big or that he can find someone better looking (as though that's his top priority anyway). Kate brings the love of Jesus to her readers, even as she makes you smile and want to hug her.
Don't miss this book. Every woman I know deserves a copy.
April 13, 2021
I think this is a really good starting point for combining body positivity with Faith. But there were definitely some parts of this book that screamed diet culture to me.
Like “if you want a cookie first pray and then go for a walk and then if you still want a cookie eat only one not the whole sleeve”
Or you could just eat a cookie without giving it a second thought and that’s ok.
Even more then one? Yeah still ok!
I also found lots of contradicting points.
How she says food isn’t inherently bad or good it’s just food (true )
But then talks about certain foods in bad lights and the importance of eating “real”food
( guess what all good is real food
Jesus still loves you if you eat a Big Mac )
It particularly made me sad when she felt bad After getting her and her daughters ice cream after a particularly bad day
It’s ok if we use food to soothe that is not a sin.
Also the mention of food addictions and the endorsement of over eaters Anonymous
Made me side eye just a little lol
(Yes I’m addicted to food if I don’t eat it I will die)
And lastly though there is no direct quote in the book ( except that odd deer quote even if it is from a saint )
It definitely gave me the Impression of a little bit fat is ok but there is limits and you cant be to fat for the sake of your health
Witch is problematic however that was only a vibe I got. And won’t go in to that more here
I did however love the parts on motherhood and it had lots of good faith perspectives
Especially seeing yourself how God Does!
All this being said I have looked at the authors more recent activity including social media. And it seems like she has come a long way in terms of body positivity HAES fat acceptance and intuitive eating.
So this review is not a reflection in her. Only a reflection on this particular book and how it might read to a fat person recovering from diet culture and interested in Combining their faith in that recovery from the perspective from the topics listed above
( HAES intuitive eating body positivity
Fat acceptance)
Over all still worth the read !
Like “if you want a cookie first pray and then go for a walk and then if you still want a cookie eat only one not the whole sleeve”
Or you could just eat a cookie without giving it a second thought and that’s ok.
Even more then one? Yeah still ok!
I also found lots of contradicting points.
How she says food isn’t inherently bad or good it’s just food (true )
But then talks about certain foods in bad lights and the importance of eating “real”food
( guess what all good is real food
Jesus still loves you if you eat a Big Mac )
It particularly made me sad when she felt bad After getting her and her daughters ice cream after a particularly bad day
It’s ok if we use food to soothe that is not a sin.
Also the mention of food addictions and the endorsement of over eaters Anonymous
Made me side eye just a little lol
(Yes I’m addicted to food if I don’t eat it I will die)
And lastly though there is no direct quote in the book ( except that odd deer quote even if it is from a saint )
It definitely gave me the Impression of a little bit fat is ok but there is limits and you cant be to fat for the sake of your health
Witch is problematic however that was only a vibe I got. And won’t go in to that more here
I did however love the parts on motherhood and it had lots of good faith perspectives
Especially seeing yourself how God Does!
All this being said I have looked at the authors more recent activity including social media. And it seems like she has come a long way in terms of body positivity HAES fat acceptance and intuitive eating.
So this review is not a reflection in her. Only a reflection on this particular book and how it might read to a fat person recovering from diet culture and interested in Combining their faith in that recovery from the perspective from the topics listed above
( HAES intuitive eating body positivity
Fat acceptance)
Over all still worth the read !
January 15, 2020
I appreciated the religious perspective on body acceptance. The author is Catholic, but I think the book applies to any Christian.
I do think this is only a start to true body acceptance. While I thought the overall message was good, there were a few things that rubbed me the wrong way. The author implies that overeating is sinful (gluttony). But I think that’s a dangerous perspective. Everyone overeats or undereats on occasion—it’s normal. It doesn’t mean we’re not taking care of our bodies—we’re just learning to follow our bodies’ cues better.
I think this is a great book to pair with Body Respect or Beauty Sick, which are both written by professionals who have done tons of research in their fields.
I do think this is only a start to true body acceptance. While I thought the overall message was good, there were a few things that rubbed me the wrong way. The author implies that overeating is sinful (gluttony). But I think that’s a dangerous perspective. Everyone overeats or undereats on occasion—it’s normal. It doesn’t mean we’re not taking care of our bodies—we’re just learning to follow our bodies’ cues better.
I think this is a great book to pair with Body Respect or Beauty Sick, which are both written by professionals who have done tons of research in their fields.
May 13, 2018
For the right audience, this book is probably a God-sent. I thought that I might be the right audience but maybe not because I found it to be underwhelming.
The arguments are sound. The theology is excellent. The quotes are edifying and encouraging. The anecdotes are interesting. But, all of that said, it felt hollow. Or maybe I just failed to connect with it.
Obviously it took me more than half year to read this 83 page book... I just couldn’t seem to get into it at any time that I tried.
The arguments are sound. The theology is excellent. The quotes are edifying and encouraging. The anecdotes are interesting. But, all of that said, it felt hollow. Or maybe I just failed to connect with it.
Obviously it took me more than half year to read this 83 page book... I just couldn’t seem to get into it at any time that I tried.
March 11, 2019
I had to read this book for school so it isn’t something I’d normally read but I enjoyed the personal stories included.
January 24, 2013
This book was over all very good. I only gave it 3 stars because I wish it focused less on women with many children because it would be a great book to give teens and young adults who are struggeling with food. The multipul chapters about the authors children makes it difficult to give to people without kids and still have it be affective. There are some very good thoughts and the meditations at the end of each chapter are a nice touch.
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