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And Never Stop Dancing: Thirty More True Things You Need to Know Now
Dr. Gordon Livingston’s national bestseller, Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart, has drawn tens of thousands of readers who have embraced its thirty bedrock truths about life and how best to live it. Now, in And Never Stop Dancing, Dr. Livingston — a Vietnam War veteran, psychiatrist, and parent twice bereaved — offers thirty more true things we need to know now.
The fresh truths Dr. Livingston explores Paradox governs our lives. Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves. We are defined by what we fear. As we grow old, the beauty steals inward.
Once again, here are Dr. Livingston’s sterling a deep understanding of the emotional tumult that courses through our lives — our hidden hypocrisies, desires, and evasions; an unerring sense of what is important; and his own ability to persevere — to hope — in a world he knows to be capable of inflicting unjustifiable and lifelong suffering.
These qualities — plus his perfectly pitched sense of humor and a singular voice — add up to another extraordinary book — one which, like its predecessor, offers us a gentle, generous, and unusual alternative to the trial-and-error learning that makes wisdom such an expensive commodity.
The fresh truths Dr. Livingston explores Paradox governs our lives. Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves. We are defined by what we fear. As we grow old, the beauty steals inward.
Once again, here are Dr. Livingston’s sterling a deep understanding of the emotional tumult that courses through our lives — our hidden hypocrisies, desires, and evasions; an unerring sense of what is important; and his own ability to persevere — to hope — in a world he knows to be capable of inflicting unjustifiable and lifelong suffering.
These qualities — plus his perfectly pitched sense of humor and a singular voice — add up to another extraordinary book — one which, like its predecessor, offers us a gentle, generous, and unusual alternative to the trial-and-error learning that makes wisdom such an expensive commodity.
208 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2006
55 people are currently reading
422 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 49 reviews
July 17, 2011
The thirty brief essays in this book by a Columbia Md psychiatrist have wonderfully aphoristic titles: paradox governs our lives, much of what we think we know is untrue, forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves, every snowflake in an avalanche pleads not guilty, etc. He writes about family, love, grief, growing older, social and moral responsibilities, and his own life experiences, including his service in the military and Vietnam. One essay, "Attachment is the source of all suffering", begins " It is impossible to comprehend the experience of grief with mere words. And yet what else do we have to help each other understand it?". The search for meaning in our lives is one of the other beyond-words topics that are explored.
February 27, 2015
Received this book as part of an "inherited library." A friend of a friend moved away, left the friend their books, and this was one of the books my friend didn't want, so he offered it and others to me. Since I'll read anything, and I have a Little Free Library to keep stocked, I took whatever he offered.
I enjoy these short-essay style bits of wisdom. In the same vein as Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, Livingston gives some quality bits of life advice. In some instances, his words helped me clarify some things I personally believed and was relieved to hear from another source.
This is definitely one I'll go back to when I need a little help working things out.
I enjoy these short-essay style bits of wisdom. In the same vein as Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, Livingston gives some quality bits of life advice. In some instances, his words helped me clarify some things I personally believed and was relieved to hear from another source.
This is definitely one I'll go back to when I need a little help working things out.
June 9, 2014
Though there were little nuggets of interesting insights, I found great swarths of this book, and its predecessor, largely useless. As others have described, many chapters were largely repetitive, espoused subjective experience as fact or were just personal stories that seemed to have no connection to a larger point.
Livingston's commentaries on the futility of war, the responsibility of nations and how he found meaning after the death of his sons I found particularly fascinating and worthwhile however, and was almost enough to justify the read.
Livingston's commentaries on the futility of war, the responsibility of nations and how he found meaning after the death of his sons I found particularly fascinating and worthwhile however, and was almost enough to justify the read.
August 15, 2011
I love Dr. Livingston's books. There are always several passages that speak to me directly. He reminds me of things I already know but sometimes dont want to face.
May 29, 2022
This book reflected many of my own beliefs, so of course that made me like it, but not learn anything. There were a few chapters that were thought provoking though. Gordon Livingston has a talent to put things very succinctly.
August 20, 2021
how do I rate a book 0 stars 😐
December 30, 2018
Nice little inspirational read.
December 5, 2019
Wise, practical, and entertaining. Gordon Livingston was a gifted writer with a deep and principled outlook on life. He has a talent for clearly discussing what actually are true things you need to know to lead a more satisfying and worthwhile life.
June 24, 2018
I had a hard time relating to this author. I found his tone a little condescending. Some good points, but overall a little preachy.
March 25, 2020
We have no choice but to keep a goin'.
October 14, 2021
His stories are insightful and raw. Written as a series of short stories or "lessons" I liked hearing some of the things I would never dare say I thought or felt out loud, someone else has felt too.
November 15, 2021
*Listening it via audio book on Libby
December 3, 2022
Like listening to a wise knowledgeable grandpa telling partly his memoir, political and religious beliefs, and nuggets of wisdom.
A general feel good book written with love.
A general feel good book written with love.
January 20, 2023
Don`t bother
October 4, 2023
I am a big self-help book person but this one just wasn’t for me. But definitely some good pieces of advice and quotes within.
November 6, 2025
Слушах тази книга на няколко ходения до супермаркета и беше добре.
March 25, 2017
A quick and easy to read collection of thirty essays by Livingston, a veteran and a psychologist. For some people, this book will go deep.
My favorite part was the chapter on paradoxes.
My favorite part was the chapter on paradoxes.
March 15, 2014
I read the description and laughed at the phrase "fresh truths". Probably half of the truths inside this book made an appearance in the previous work: "Too soon old, too late smart". Perhaps Livingston felt it was necessary to elaborate on things mentioned in passing.
Some define happiness as the ratio between accomplishment and expectations, and it must be noted that both are self-defined. We can be proud of the smallest achievements, if we so choose.
We do not release transgressors from accountability by forgiving, we free ourselves from the burden of bitterness.
We are entitled to receive only as much as we are prepared to give.
Anger begets anger. Break old destructive patterns.
Rather than medication, Livingston prefers to challenge his patients to relinquish passivity, stop waiting for answers outside themselves, mobilise their courage and determination, and try to discover what changes will bring them closer to others and to the people they want to be.
Perhaps the entire self-help industry is dependent on a 'life is hard, then you die' world-view, in which people will necessarily need a lot of help and guidance. The problem with that is that it keeps expectations low and stress levels high.
The Chaplain Corps was a wholly owned subsidiary of the military and concerned itself with providing a kind of theological justification for the task at hand, instead of simply ministering to the souls of the soldiers.
People engage in what turns out in most cases to be a disappointing quest for the person who will save them with the unqualified approval and support that is our deepest wish. Seldom does this search take the form of asking the really important question: "What can I make of myself that would make me worthy to give and receive such love?"
It is only when we are too obtuse, frightened or distracted to ask the important questions that we are truly lost.
Above all, we might do well to cultivate a certain humility about our particular conception of what constitutes an ethical life and be willing to accept those who peacefully disagree with us.
It requires the certainty of the true believer to justify the forcible imposition of one's view of the world.
Each of our stories deserves to be told, and yet to whom can we tell them?
The act of listening has the effect of establishing and reaffirming our concern about the other person.
It is a commentary on our close relationships that it is so unclear to many whether their spouses are supporters or adversaries.
Society has a very narrow and misguided definition of heroism. Many do not choose to die, (whether in combat or otherwise, they were simply unfortunate) Our heroes are our role models when it comes to the hard choices, so we should choose who we look up to carefully.
Knowledge requires the assimilation of information into a framework that promotes understanding.
To criticise this country when its (always temporary) leadership violates the core values of individual worth and human dignity is a profoundly patriotic act. Those who endorse the idea of "my country, right or wrong" are subversives who would use the flag to blindfold us all.
Writing one's own obituary is a good self-reflection tool, especially when we are still young enough to act upon our regrets.
Some define happiness as the ratio between accomplishment and expectations, and it must be noted that both are self-defined. We can be proud of the smallest achievements, if we so choose.
We do not release transgressors from accountability by forgiving, we free ourselves from the burden of bitterness.
We are entitled to receive only as much as we are prepared to give.
Anger begets anger. Break old destructive patterns.
Rather than medication, Livingston prefers to challenge his patients to relinquish passivity, stop waiting for answers outside themselves, mobilise their courage and determination, and try to discover what changes will bring them closer to others and to the people they want to be.
Perhaps the entire self-help industry is dependent on a 'life is hard, then you die' world-view, in which people will necessarily need a lot of help and guidance. The problem with that is that it keeps expectations low and stress levels high.
The Chaplain Corps was a wholly owned subsidiary of the military and concerned itself with providing a kind of theological justification for the task at hand, instead of simply ministering to the souls of the soldiers.
People engage in what turns out in most cases to be a disappointing quest for the person who will save them with the unqualified approval and support that is our deepest wish. Seldom does this search take the form of asking the really important question: "What can I make of myself that would make me worthy to give and receive such love?"
It is only when we are too obtuse, frightened or distracted to ask the important questions that we are truly lost.
Above all, we might do well to cultivate a certain humility about our particular conception of what constitutes an ethical life and be willing to accept those who peacefully disagree with us.
It requires the certainty of the true believer to justify the forcible imposition of one's view of the world.
Each of our stories deserves to be told, and yet to whom can we tell them?
The act of listening has the effect of establishing and reaffirming our concern about the other person.
It is a commentary on our close relationships that it is so unclear to many whether their spouses are supporters or adversaries.
Society has a very narrow and misguided definition of heroism. Many do not choose to die, (whether in combat or otherwise, they were simply unfortunate) Our heroes are our role models when it comes to the hard choices, so we should choose who we look up to carefully.
Knowledge requires the assimilation of information into a framework that promotes understanding.
To criticise this country when its (always temporary) leadership violates the core values of individual worth and human dignity is a profoundly patriotic act. Those who endorse the idea of "my country, right or wrong" are subversives who would use the flag to blindfold us all.
Writing one's own obituary is a good self-reflection tool, especially when we are still young enough to act upon our regrets.
December 13, 2008
Using the same short-essay approach that made Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart such a interesting and insightful read, And Never Stop Dancing collects 30 observations about how we live and relate to one another, distilling the wisdom of Dr. Livingston's experiences as a psychiatrist and a student of the human condition.
I am not usually a fan of self-help books. What makes this one stand out is its clear-eyed outlook and direct, unadorned style. Livingston does not hold to simple remedies to complex problems, but he does simplify our understanding of the forces at work within us all. If you're looking for the kind of inspiring, feel-good anecdotes that have sold millions of Chicken Soup for the Soul books, then go back to that series and its imitators. Livingston frankly admits that life is not easy, and his solution for our difficulties is not simply to "have faith." Nor does he follow the trends of the psychiatric profession in general and prescribe medication for every ill. Rather, he encourages us to engage with the problems that are at the root of our symptoms of loneliness, depression, and dissatisfaction. This is a less popular approach than the alternatives he avoids, but that is in part why his advice seems so full of wisdom. The more arduous path in these cases is the one more likely to have a real and lasting effect.
I am not usually a fan of self-help books. What makes this one stand out is its clear-eyed outlook and direct, unadorned style. Livingston does not hold to simple remedies to complex problems, but he does simplify our understanding of the forces at work within us all. If you're looking for the kind of inspiring, feel-good anecdotes that have sold millions of Chicken Soup for the Soul books, then go back to that series and its imitators. Livingston frankly admits that life is not easy, and his solution for our difficulties is not simply to "have faith." Nor does he follow the trends of the psychiatric profession in general and prescribe medication for every ill. Rather, he encourages us to engage with the problems that are at the root of our symptoms of loneliness, depression, and dissatisfaction. This is a less popular approach than the alternatives he avoids, but that is in part why his advice seems so full of wisdom. The more arduous path in these cases is the one more likely to have a real and lasting effect.
March 14, 2009
Good inspiration, I would say a lot of wisdom from lifetime experience. I would recommend. Writing down quotes from the different books I read, I wrote 23 of them for this one, that is quite a lot! So for sure I would say that I found something in this book.
However, not being american, at time, I did not feel the same calling ... a bit moralist, certainly someone who is still angry at his government (Bush was President at the time of writing the book). Yes, we all know that Vietnam was a BIG mistake and we shall never do it again ... and Irak is again a lost cause. Without these little paternalist intake, I would have given a 4.
However, not being american, at time, I did not feel the same calling ... a bit moralist, certainly someone who is still angry at his government (Bush was President at the time of writing the book). Yes, we all know that Vietnam was a BIG mistake and we shall never do it again ... and Irak is again a lost cause. Without these little paternalist intake, I would have given a 4.
July 4, 2014
OK, but way too much repetition of similar ideas from the first book (Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart). Also, the chapter titles (things to "know") often don't correspond completely with the content; at times the writing seems to veer off topic. Many chapters were somewhat lacking in structure and cohesiveness.
Nevertheless, there are some gems of wisdom throughout the book (and in the previous book) that are worth knowing.
Nevertheless, there are some gems of wisdom throughout the book (and in the previous book) that are worth knowing.
September 8, 2014
"Choose you partner VERY carefully; take care of your children; don't be worried by a divorce, just do it; don't parent if you are a step-parent; enjoy your old age; die gracefully".... these are few suggestions which the author has given in this book. The book seems like a senior citizen (who happens to be a psychiatrist too) sitting on a bench in a park, reflecting on his life. Nothing impressive.
I like the title of the book though. That is quite inspiring.
I like the title of the book though. That is quite inspiring.
February 15, 2008
I enjoy reading these sort of books...inspirational, how to be happy and kind etc...how to enjoy life. You only have to learn one new little thing and it is worth the read. This book in particular is easy to read...short chapters which one can read on their own without having to read the whole book.
January 22, 2008
This isn't a story it's simply inspiration an understanding, written by someone who has seen a fair bit and understands the human mind. i like books like this. who doesn't need a little bit more inspiration or knowlegde in their life
February 23, 2013
Interesting perspectives from a man that has many life experiences and a window into human behavior through his career choice. These are truly aspects in everyones lives and things we should all be contemplating. Good read!
January 28, 2016
The chapters are short but each brings an intriguing story endured by Livingston's personal life.( He is a master at story telling.) I consider this book authentic and very grounded. It brings consciousness and awareness through the defining lens of experience and age.
December 28, 2016
While there were some chapters I disagreed with, the overall text is a concise read with practical counsel. I've adopted the method of creating my own obituary (despite being 22 years young) which will be routinely updated throughout my entire life.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 10, 2008
I loved it. I'm currently reading the prequel to this book, and am surprised to find that I don't love it as much.
January 23, 2008
Great self-contained chapters make it easy to break up the reading and digest the thoughts. Keep it on the nightstand!
July 2, 2008
The sequel to Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart and it's just as genius! Everything I said about that one applies to this one too!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 49 reviews